Lines uttered by Arnold Scwarzenegger (as Mr Freeze) in "Batman & Robin"

he doesn't actually say "Ice to see you" does he?

"you're not taking ME to ze COOLER" was a hilarious stoned catchphrase amongst my friends for about a year after this film came out.

"A frosty reception indeed!"

"Rest assured Batman, this is snow joke"

"Shiver me timbers"

glad again I'm not "into" bad movies

^
"A frosty reception indeed!"

"Adam and Evil!"

omg huge lols

"A laundry service that delivers. Wow!" ???

glad again I'm not "into" bad movies

-- Dr Morbius, Friday, March 28, 2008 3:04 PM (18 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

^
"A frosty reception indeed!"

-- latebloomer, Friday, March 28, 2008 3:05 PM (16 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

lolololol

"In this universe, there's only one absolute... everything freezes!"

orly

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJWpmPGCR1c

contains the laundry line

i mean i might just have to go with "ice to see you," that kind of pushes my buttons, so simple and elegant and completely retarded

lO_ol @ at gratuitous ass shots

"I need to get more diamonds, from my hideout."

^all about the comma

they had to have had a cookie jar full of ice/cold puns which they just pulled up at random and plugged in, wacky mad-libs style

was "ice to see you" a deliberate bite of McBain or is it possible that two individual minds could come up with such genius?

Batman and Robin clearly had about a hundred minds involved in the scriptwriting process.

man Akiva Goldsman has so much to answer for

# Angels & Demons (2009) (pre-production) (screenplay)

# I Am Legend (2007) (screenplay)
... aka I Am Legend: The IMAX Experience (USA: IMAX version)
# The Da Vinci Code (2006) (screenplay)
# Cinderella Man (2005) (screenplay)
# I, Robot (2004) (screenplay)
... aka I, Robot (Germany)
# A Beautiful Mind (2001) (written by)

# Practical Magic (1998) (screenplay)
# Lost in Space (1998) (written by)
... aka LS (USA: promotional abbreviation)
# Batman & Robin (1997) (written by)
# A Time to Kill (1996) (screenplay)
# Batman Forever (1995) (screenplay)
# Silent Fall (1994) (written by)
# The Client (1994) (screenplay)

lost in space might be worse than this though not as lolsome

"Can you be cold, Batman? You have eleven minutes to thaw a bird. What will you do? Chase the villain or save the boy? Your emotions make you weak. That's why this day is mine!"

i think i'd rather have another adam west-era tribute like this than serious dark knight is serious.

"That's why this day is mine!"

^^ useful for IRL conversation

"If I must suffer, humanity will suffer with me."

Schwarzenegger OTM

"Hello, Sorry about the door, Is the party over?"

hope this one was actually sincere

ha, i missed the "thaw a bird" part of that line

"Chase the villain or save the boy"

in every batman story ever...

"If I must suffer, humanity will suffer with me."

-credo of Joel Schumacher

did he mean Robin re 'thaw a bird'?

"Take two of these, and call me in the morning."

what is he referring to here

snowballs

I reckons he meant Thora Hird myself!

'You have eleven minutes to Thora Hird'.

omg, I'm just imagining Arnie saying that.

up and at them

jiminy jillickers!

"I'm afraid my condition has left me cold to your pleas of mercy."

^^ i'm into the failed bloefeld with his eyebrow raised vibe here

i have to go with "let's kick some ice!"

speaking of George Clooney, he and Renee Zellweger came to the theater I used to work at on Wednesday for a special screening of "Leatherheads" (he filmed it here in Greenville, SC).

if i had had the chance to attend i so would've yelled a B&R line at him

man I remember my housemate bringing home the script of this movie (she was doing editing for it) and the many roflz it provided. I never actually saw the finished film tho.

"What killed the dinosaurs? The Ice Age!"

not even scientifically accurate:(

xp: Leatherheads badly needs some of these Mr Freeze lines

all these lines remind me of the 30 rock "ITS SO GREAT WE CAN WRITE WHILE WERE ON COKE" bit

Clooney as Bats is such horrible horrible miscasting.

clooney as freeze, arnold as bats.

"I'm Baaatmaaan! Arrrrrggg!!" (Does bonkers eye thing)

exactly what brilliant skills are needed for a "good" Batman, fanboys?

SOME folx can write on coke, or the original SNL wouldn't have been so much fucking funnier than Tina Fey.

watching the youtube clip of "highlights" i realized i had totally forgotten about the BATMAN CREDIT CARD

"Never leave the cave without it"

SOME folx can write on coke, or the original SNL wouldn't have been so much fucking funnier than Tina Fey.

-- Dr Morbius, Friday, March 28, 2008 4:11 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Link

lol u old

snl funniness levels vary minutely. the rest is nostalgia

thread of the year

taxi driver was written on coke

"Ice to see you!"

definitely "ice to see you" cause mcbain says it too

"you're not taking ME to ze COOLER" was is still a hilarious stoned catchphrase amongst my friends for about a year after this film came out.

man Akiva Goldsman has so much to answer for

Won an Oscar for A Beautiful Mind, too.

YOU HAVE ELEVEN MINUTES TO THAW A BIRD?

"Ice to see you, to see you..."
http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/41646000/jpg/_41646672_bruce.jpg
"ICE!!!"

"Follow the numbers, Batman, for they are the harbingers of your doom."

Hey the thaw a bird vote is going to be split, you have two thaw a bird options!

snl funniness levels vary minutely. the rest is nostalgia

lol, repeat often: Radner/Aykroyd vs Nealon/Meadows

meadows >>>> aykroyd

Gilda Radner's cool but it's not like she's the GOAT

Meadows was pretty funny in Walk Hard

snl's best era is whenever you were 12 years old

^ the new cash sitta

I gotta say - I got the first season of SNL DVDs as a gift (totally unasked for, I might add) and was watching them and uh, the lolz are pretty few and far between. Chevy Chase is actually consistently the funniest. If anything makes watching it worthwhile, its the musical performances.

yer right, Canadian, it was best when it wasn't on the air yet and Aykroyd was at Second City

(Shakey, the 2nd season is better)

snl's best era is whenever you were 12 years old

-- s1ocki, Friday, March 28, 2008 6:47 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

^

yeah s1ocki otm

actually funniest thing in the first season is Paul Simon beating Connie Hawkins in one-on-one

I'm sorry but I think Kevin Nealon is way funnier than Gilda Radner.

Although now that I think about it I probably mean Doug from Weeds Kevin Nealon rather than SNL Kevin Nealon.

morbs, does 30 Rock register on your hate scale?

I've never seen 30 Rock.

we are not talking about post-SNL movies, stoner idiots.

also what kind of hippie parents let kids stay up til 1 a.m.? No wonder you think bad Batman movies are comedy gold.

Paul Simon beating Connie Hawkins in one-on-one

This was the first SNL I watched.

12-year-old kids, I mean

who mentioned SNL movies?

first SNL I saw was when I was 12-13 and it was re-runs shown during the day

i grew up w/my dad sitting me down to watch the chevy chase/steve martin best ofs

xp: ok nickalish said Weeds, non-SNL project.

I get it, whatever original-cast SNL archives you watched when you were 12 was the best.

(and yes, SCTV was better)

also what kind of hippie parents let kids stay up til 1 a.m.?

It's midnight central time. Also, the first SNL I remember watching all the way through was with my parents on NYE 1988 (I was 9), which was mildly embarrassing since it contained the infamous "nude beach" sketch with Matthew Broderick.

I did started watching it regularly at age 12, though. Kids in 7th grade would definitely talk about SNL skits on the bus or in homeroom on Monday morning.

stop it you dumbshits

lol

i remember when magic johnson was first diagnosed w HIV when i was in fourth grade, all the kids on the bus talked about that a lot

saturday ice live

Prepare for a bitter harvest. Winter has come at last.

http://www.metal-rules.com/zine/images/stories/interviews/CelticFrost/1143737384.jpg

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

Different, equally beautiful YouTube compliation: Cheesy ice references in Batman & Robin.

As for the poll, tough choosing between horrible ice puns by themselves, and really gratuitous, awkward jokes (eg the dinosaurs thing). This has a certain rambling, disjointed majesty about it:

"Surprise, I am your new cell mate. And I'm here to make your life a living hell. Prepare for a bitter harvest. Winter has come at last."

In the end, though, it has to be "Everybody chill!" which is especially great because it's an ice pun to a phrase nobody actually uses. Like, have you, or people around you, ever actually proclaimed "Everybody chill!"? So great!

there's even more here:

http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Batman_&_Robin_(1997_film)

Like, have you, or people around you, ever actually proclaimed "Everybody chill!"? So great!

uh, yes?

My condition leaves me cold to your contraindicative evidence.

Bill Clinton tells everybody to chill

If only he had taken his lessons from another, somewhat greater Arnold performance:

John Connor: Yeah. Or, "Later dickwad." If someone gets upset you say, "Chill out." Or you can do combinations.
The Terminator: Chill out, dickwad.

he really was born to play an emotionless robot

Emotionless cybernetic organism.

"I hate it when they talk during the movie."

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f312/Tonito44/ThatsRacist.gif

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

yesssssss

"I need to get more diamonds, from my hideout." 3

I've never actually heard this line uttered but it's pretty fantastic sitting there on the page. The comma makes it work.

That and the unnecessariness of the second clause. Of course he keeps his diamonds in his hideout.

"Allow me to break the ice. My name is Freeze. Learn it well. For it's the chilling sound of your doom."

this one amuses me because it's so belabored yet it scares absolutely no one

and arnold's delivery of it just makes it even more unwieldy and ridiculous sounding

I'm going to watch the Rifftrax version of this tonight

oh man i wish i had a copy handy to do the rifftrax thing with this

"We aim to ... Freeze!"

this thread delivers

this is on TV right now. I've never seen it before. kinda amazing.

amazing in a "completely incomprehensible and nonsensical from one shot to the next/I can't believe this got released by a major studio" kinda way

The Rifftrax is also definitely worth it.

"Allow me to break the ice. My name is Freeze. Learn it well. For it's the chilling sound of your doom."

this one amuses me because it's so belabored yet it scares absolutely no one

― latebloomer, Monday, March 31, 2008 7:10 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark

yup

the timeline goes like this iirc

--McBain says "Ice to see you" as general Arnold parody in 1994
--Batman and Robin comes out in 1997, and I end up saying "Ice to see you" to my friend like 100 times before movie comes out, pretty much every time the preview airs, annoying the piss out of him.
--I watch movie (sucks) and that line doesn't actually appear in it.

y'all wasted yr votes

Also, watching this clip reveals plenty of other candidates. And it looks like it's not "Everybody chill!" but "All right, everyone! Chill! Chill! Chill!"

Still think "hideout," though having no ice references, was robbed.

This is my favorite Batman movie!

John Simon's review (from what I remember) contained one of his all-time funniest descriptions: "...like watching a Halloween-themed gay pride festival."

And this insight:

"The way beautiful women are almost systematically demeaned and made ridiculous in this film (more so than usual) betrays, it would seem, an anti-hetero stance."

The latter quote is also ironic because I think the screenwriter lives in Provincetown, MA.

"I need to get more diamonds, from my hideout." was robbed

"Surprise, I am your new cell mate. And I'm here to make your life a living hell. Prepare for a bitter harvest. WIN

"I need to get more diamonds, from my hideout."

"I need to get more diamonds, from my hideout."

vs.

[Hudson Hawk has just decapitated a villain]
"Looks like you won't be attending that hat convention, in July."

the comma makes them both.

"I hope you save some turkey, for me"

^^^ so is that how you're supposed to say it?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJWpmPGCR1c

3:30
"It's wintah fowevah heya gatha"

"Ice to see you!"

"I need to get more diamonds, from my hideout." was robbed

I just came to say that as one of three proud voters.

"Their bones will turn to ice! Their blood will freeze in my hands!"

"Their disemboweled corpses will turn into snow!"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSGhRMyVv0I

3:30
"It's wintah fowevah heya gatha"

― abanana, Friday, June 5, 2009 8:21 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark

Haha from the screencap I thought this was going to be a clip from some indie skit making fun of the movie, not clips from the movie itself.

http://www.zhippo.com/MikeDevriesTattoosHOSTED/images/gallery/ivy_mrfreeze.jpg

awesome.

"A laundry service that delivers. Wow!"

^Totally should have won.

http://www.comicsalliance.com/2011/07/05/batman-and-robin-movie-review/

^^^ these dudes almost make me want to see this thing, against all odds.

Yeah I was loving that review.

Stop, go back and check out 'Batman & Robin in 5 seconds'.

oh this is totally worth seeing. thankfully i was old enough when it came out to appreciate the 0_o factor rather than be indignant at the Seriousness of Batman being tarnished or some bullshit, like i prolly woulda been a few years earlier.

now i have to go get some more diamonds, from my hideout.

GA-THAM!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VY7MLgy5Whw
^^^ Most of the YouTube links upthread are dead, but one of them was probably this.

It's wintah fowevah heya gatha!

This is my favorite Batman movie!

― sassy cassie (Tape Store), Friday, June 5, 2009 12:40 AM (2 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

I still think TS was someone's pre-brodie experiment in socks

"kick some ice" should prolly have won this poll, imo

Love the delivery on that one, he really savors it.

Was "Have an ice day!" too prosaic for Goldsman?

Lots of missed opportunities really - - "Buy one, get one FREEZE!" "Watch out, Batman! You'll catch your death of COLD!" "Goodness glaciers!" "There's SNOW way!" "Take a COLD shower!" etc etc.

Also could have done self-referential stuff doing cold variants of classic Arnold lines - - "Get to the chiller!" Sigh.

I'm detective John Igloo

"I need your clothes, your boots, and your popsicle..."

Tape Store is a very real person

So is Mr. Freeze

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YkTHtWX7CCY

new, even more complete all-Freeze compilation, featuring the previously undiscussed "Always winterize...your PIPES."

and, someone has re-uploaded the short form highlight reel:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VNaDZIrxh-0

Icy Cold frOST! FREEZE WINter! FREEZING CHILL

Many real life LOLs to this thread this morning. Thank you, Mr. Freeze. You have warmed my cold, cold heart.

"I need to get more diamonds" should have won.

egg-cellent, and that's no yolk

http://blogs.coventrytelegraph.net/thegeekfiles/Vincent%20Price%20Egghead.jpg

Goofs
Errors made by characters (possibly deliberate errors by the filmmakers): Freeze says "What killed the dinosaurs? The Ice Age!" There was no Ice Age when they went extinct.

Yeah... I think that was a deliberate creative choice, to show that Freeze is so bent on his quest that his extensive scientific knowledge is slipping away.

Why are the Planet Hollywood guys wasting their time with the Expendables when they could give us the John McClane & Rambo vs. Mr. Freeze movie America needs now more than ever

still think Arn was funniest in The Jayne Mansfield Story. "Chaynes!"

I'm detective John Igloo

― little mushroom person (abanana), Monday, July 25, 2011 6:17 PM Bookmark

I had forgotten this movie also has Jessie Ventura (as a security guard or something who gets kissed to death by Uma Ivy). The heads of two states were in this movie. Ugh.

they were both in predator, too

That goes without saying.

dying reading these poll options

"Surprise, I am your new cell mate. And I'm here to make your life a living hell. Prepare for a bitter harvest. Win 1

^^^ robbed

"In this universe, there's only one absolute... everything freezes!"

A laundry service that delivers is just.....what???

how did i miss this thread's revival?!?

the timeline goes like this iirc

--McBain says "Ice to see you" as general Arnold parody in 1994
--Batman and Robin comes out in 1997, and I end up saying "Ice to see you" to my friend like 100 times before movie comes out, pretty much every time the preview airs, annoying the piss out of him.
--I watch movie (sucks) and that line doesn't actually appear in it.

y'all wasted yr votes

― Whiney G. Weingarten, Friday, June 5, 2009 12:47 AM (3 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

It's a FREEZE country, Whiney.

"ice to see you" was still a great icebreaker w/ friends and strangers whilst waiting on line at the theater to watch batman and robin.

http://i.qkme.me/35a77t.jpg

LOL cannot believe that's not a line in the movie.

i just saw the new expendables movie and any of these lines would have been preferable to what arnold says in this one.

Watching this just now and after reeling in horror during the museum heist at the beginning I'm not sure that I don't see exactly what Schumacher was trying to do and am actually quite enjoying it.

I don't see exactly what Schumacher was trying to do

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toyetic

Was thinking about this guy the other day. How angry he must have been to be so cold all the time. Just trying to make the best of things with a corny sense of humor and a life of crime.

Was thinking about this guy the other day while waiting for the bus

Was it the.... FROST-TOWN express?

No, it was the ICE-NINE 50.

just a lonely dude standing here thinkin' bout freeze

ze icy Cooooold

I thawed I might find you here

IT'S WINTAH FOWEVAH HEYA GOTHA

"Allow me to break the ice. My name is Freeze. Learn it well. For it's the chilling sound of your doom." is such an underrated sequence

"Looks like my freezemobile is snowed in. Guess I'll have to ride my ICICLE!"

Watched this a few weeks ago. Ridiculously enjoyable movie.

The last great Batman movie :(

http://www.news.com.au/finance/economy/interest-rates/stevens-chills-out-on-cash-rate-cut/news-story/58b1e73eeb2a4a5c21e1c9927ee77ee4

can this guy come back and go on a rampage please? our nation turns its melting eyes to freeze.

cool party robbed

awesome spread of votes though

get well soon!

Get to the doctah!

arnold being 70 just seems... wrong somehow

When I was young, my brother and I spent like ten minutes trying to figure out the pun in that "laundry service" line

this was kind of wild, i found about this during a checkup with my cardiologist. pretty cool to hear it was non-invasive surgery (rather than the chest-cracking one i endured at 10 months of age). maybe if i have to get surgery again i can get the Arnold version