What it is about BEING SINGLE and/or LIVING ALONE that is so ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC!

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you'd think

― gershy, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 15:38 (seventeen years ago) link

Other than the link to the "things my girlfriend and I argue about" page, this is the single greatest thing on the couple-kvetch thread:

Name the one habit or trait that drives you most around the twist about your partner/boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife/whatever

Being Imaginary.

Masonic Boom on Tuesday, February 27, 2007 8:18 AM (Yesterday)

So Kate, It's a damn good thing that thread was started. I laughed so hard over that!

― Beth Parker, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 16:43 (seventeen years ago) link

2) You wash dishes

No, that's the problem. When I'm single, I don't.

― jaymc, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 17:03 (seventeen years ago) link

you can fester in hatred with out anyone to break that cycle

― Ronan, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 17:07 (seventeen years ago) link

you can become embittered and mean without any asshole correcting you for it.

― Ronan, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 17:07 (seventeen years ago) link

can wallow in being single, this isn't possible when not single.

― Ronan, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 17:08 (seventeen years ago) link

you can define yourself by being single to the point where you're never likely to get in a relationship and then act surprised and indignant about this! such fun! erm....

― Ronan, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 17:08 (seventeen years ago) link

jalapenos

― 688, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 17:09 (seventeen years ago) link

why can jalapenos not be a couple thing? we eat them with gusto at my house.

― Ms Misery, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 17:09 (seventeen years ago) link

Ronan OTMx100000

― Rock Hardy, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 17:10 (seventeen years ago) link

2) You wash dishes

No, that's the problem. When I'm single, I don't.

I am much cleaner and more conscientious when I only have to clean up my own mess. The mess is somehow 20x more manageable, even if it's only half the size. I do not know why this is.

― kenan, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 17:16 (seventeen years ago) link

This thread is stupid. Serious answer:

1) I really like being able to go to the gym or work on music as much as I want without feeling guilty that I'm ignoring my girlfriend.

2) Watch whatever movies I want!

― Jordan, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 17:18 (seventeen years ago) link

7689) No fear of being one of those couples I see ALL THE TIME that sit together in pubs, restaurants wherever, in stony silence because there's nothing left to talk about and looking as if their souls have completely withered away. Trapped together out of fear of being single. Fun times.

7690) Being able to talk to, flirt with, even fucking look at any other girl without getting an earful.

7691) And one night stands are slightly less problematic when single.

7692) The routines you slide into when in a relationship. So much harder to break away from.

One bad thing about being single though: seeing less and less of those freinds who are with controlling, jealous partners who never let them off the leash for more than five minutes and even when they do and you get back to theirs after a night out, there's usually a frosty atmosphere between them and you think fuck this I'm better off out of it.

― DavidM, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 19:26 (seventeen years ago) link

You sound bitter, mate!

― Dr.C, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 19:28 (seventeen years ago) link

I don't think this thread is stupid. There are good things about being single, and listing some of them might help someone who's feeling badly (like they're waiting around, or like they're unattractive, or fearing they'll always be single) remember them.

Unfortunately, things like "don't have to cook when you don't feel like it" or "your dishes STAY clean" don't apply when you have roommates and cooking / cleaning schedule. Nope. Nor does "you can watch whatever you want on TV," because what if there's a basketball game on? Or "you can play loud music," because what if someone else wants to go to bed early?

I particularly like not being accountable for anyone for free time, though. And the excitement of meeting people! Oh, and since I'm about to graduate college and move who knows where, it's very freeing not to have to make decisions about the future that involve compromising with someone else's decisions about the future. That's THE big one. Although I suppose having to make decisions with someone else would give a measure of security that you wouldn't be totally alone wherever you go, I've seen it backfire badly as well.

― Maria, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 20:14 (seventeen years ago) link

This is the first time I have ever lived on my own and it is so f*cking awesome I don't know where to start. All of the above otm. All covered. The dancing. The cleaning. The nudity. The MUSIC whilst cooking. Love it all.

― Hard like armour, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 21:47 (seventeen years ago) link

You never have to worry about your sig. other coming in when you're trying to get sleep for work-- it SUCKS when you're on opposite work schedules. Not all couples are, to be sure, but it is the worst.

― Will M., Wednesday, 28 February 2007 21:49 (seventeen years ago) link

I read that as "You never have to worry about your wig."

― Hard like armour, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 21:51 (seventeen years ago) link

I am much cleaner and more conscientious when I only have to clean up my own mess. The mess is somehow 20x more manageable, even if it's only half the size. I do not know why this is.

Yeah, if I'm accountable to no one, I start to develop really bad habits. All the things that are great about being single and living alone are definitely worth celebrating, but once it's 3 AM and you're still on the Internet, staring bleary-eyed at porn, and you've had three beers and you have to get up in four hours and your dirty laundry is scattered across the apartment and a stack of two-week-old dishes in the sink, then it's kind of a drag. When I have girlfriend, I clean more, partially out of simple guilt (not wanting to look like a slob in front of them) and partially because the steadiness of a relationship makes me want to make everything in my life straight and tidy.

― jaymc, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 22:04 (seventeen years ago) link

no one there to talk you out of lunatic ideas that really are pretty fantastic.

― chicago kevin, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 22:05 (seventeen years ago) link

Thank god for the 'or' in the title -- you can be coupled AND live alone, and it's ace. Two houses, so one to go visit when yours is a total tip. Result.

― .stet., Wednesday, 28 February 2007 22:16 (seventeen years ago) link

Yeah, that's my sitch, too.

― jaymc, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 22:19 (seventeen years ago) link

I start to develop really bad habits. All the things that are great about being single and living alone are definitely worth celebrating, but once it's 3 AM and you're still on the Internet, staring bleary-eyed at porn, and you've had three beers and you have to get up in four hours

yeah, see, I do all those things, and also dishes and laundry.

― kenan, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 22:22 (seventeen years ago) link

One bad thing about being single though: seeing less and less of those freinds who are with controlling, jealous partners who never let them off the leash for more than five minutes and even when they do and you get back to theirs after a night out, there's usually a frosty atmosphere between them and you think fuck this I'm better off out of it.

Wow, I never knew David M was David Mamet.

― accentmonkey, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 22:41 (seventeen years ago) link

the novelty of living alone wears off after about a year, at the latest

― the sir weeze, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 23:00 (seventeen years ago) link

untrue, in my experience.

― kenan, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 23:02 (seventeen years ago) link

Nine months of joy to go.

― Hard like armour, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 23:05 (seventeen years ago) link

I particularly like not being accountable for anyone for free time, though. And the excitement of meeting people! Oh, and since I'm about to graduate college and move who knows where, it's very freeing not to have to make decisions about the future that involve compromising with someone else's decisions about the future. That's THE big one.

otm actually..this is quite difficult for me and my girlfriend at the moment...

― Ronan, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 23:11 (seventeen years ago) link

Well, there's the sort of happiness about being alone that people who are involved or live with someone yearn for, then there's the sort that single people throw in others' faces because they're bitter about being single.

I think it's fantastic I can tell the difference between the two because I am recently single.

― mh, Wednesday, 28 February 2007 23:20 (seventeen years ago) link

i don't have to share my onion rings with anyone.

downside, there's no one to share my onion rings with.

― chicago kevin, Thursday, 1 March 2007 14:27 (seventeen years ago) link

this thread makes me want to VOMIT!

― blueski, Thursday, 1 March 2007 14:28 (seventeen years ago) link

That'll be the onion rings, then.

― Forest Pines, Thursday, 1 March 2007 14:31 (seventeen years ago) link

man, my colon has the unique ability to turn something as innocuous as onion rings into zyklon-b. it's terrible. BUT I LOVE ONION RINGS!!!

― chicago kevin, Thursday, 1 March 2007 14:37 (seventeen years ago) link

chicago kevin again finds the nub

― Tracer Hand, Thursday, 1 March 2007 14:37 (seventeen years ago) link

i don't know what that means but if it was a crack about living alone then you can cram it with walnuts ugly.

― chicago kevin, Thursday, 1 March 2007 14:44 (seventeen years ago) link

get to die alone, and no-one berates you for it....

― darraghmac, Thursday, 1 March 2007 14:50 (seventeen years ago) link

man, my colon has the unique ability to turn something as innocuous as onion rings into zyklon-b. it's terrible. BUT I LOVE ONION RINGS!!!

You're not alone. I'm just as bad, and so's my father.

― Forest Pines, Thursday, 1 March 2007 14:51 (seventeen years ago) link

i COULD cram it with walnuts, if i lived alone >:(

i meant you had found the paradoxical nub of the question!

― Tracer Hand, Thursday, 1 March 2007 15:01 (seventeen years ago) link

It would be nice for once in a while to come home and find all my cleaning/dishes done for me. But other than that it's okay, I get to park all four of my bicycles in the kitchen which I'm pretty sure I wouldn't get away with if someone else lived here

― Ste, Thursday, 1 March 2007 15:56 (seventeen years ago) link

i meant you had found the paradoxical nub of the question!

Is that like the proverbial egg in the briefcase?

― jaymc, Thursday, 1 March 2007 15:59 (seventeen years ago) link

Bosko Balaban Stats For Season

Name Bosko Balaban
Team Aston Villa
Total Appearances 0
Starts 0
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Total Minutes Played 0
Avg Minutes Played Per Start 0
Goals 0
Avg Goal Mins When Starting 0.0
Avg Mins Played/Goal Scored 0
Goals Scored As Sub 0
Number of Bookings 0
Total Booking Minutes 0
Avg Bookings Per Start 0
Number of Red Cards 0
Total Red Card Minutes 0
Avg Red Cards Per Start 0
Avg Booking Minutes When Starting 0.0

― 688, Thursday, 1 March 2007 16:04 (seventeen years ago) link

wrong thread dude

― Ste, Thursday, 1 March 2007 16:08 (seventeen years ago) link

it is?

― 688, Thursday, 1 March 2007 16:20 (seventeen years ago) link

don't have to hide secret identity even at home, can drip-dry super costume in bathroom, kick back

no awkward "maybe we can be crime-fighting team" talk when identity inevitably discovered

uninterrupted brooding, revenge schemes

― rrrobyn, Thursday, 1 March 2007 16:23 (seventeen years ago) link

hahaha i heart rrrobyn

― tissp, Thursday, 1 March 2007 16:26 (seventeen years ago) link

If it's not I have no idea of the joke

― Ste, Thursday, 1 March 2007 16:29 (seventeen years ago) link

Kate, I hope your gig goes well, and that you flirt with many, many fans/boys/girls - I have not yet heard Shimura Curves, because you haven't toured Massachusetts. YET!

As for single/couple - separate space is important, because it's good to feel like you're single sometimes. i would prefer separate houses - even separate houses in various countries- but I live in an apartment, so we have worked out: two computers, two tvs, one bedroom, which is MINE, (no clothes tangling up bother) but he usually sleeps there, a "guest" bedroom where his stuff is all happily stored. With all of the boy stuff, including the gigantic tv, the xbox, the remotes, and his clothing. And detritus. And ephemera.
It has taken years to figure this out.
I THINK having kids pretty much rules out the huge internal searching that leads to the "separate, but equal" form of the intimate cohabitation situation.
Unless you are very rich and can have nannies. And multiple homes on various continents.

My unhappiness can be the cause of a breakdown in any system, including this relationship. Having my own "walls to color on" can be the antidote to the situation.
I like to sing, once a week, at an Irish/Celtic music session. I go by myself, get smooched by many musicians, and return home satisfied by my performance, by the companionship, and by the smooches of others. (No tongue, of course!).
I think, Kate, that singing and being adored is going to make you happy and smoochy.
Good luck!~

― aimurchie, Thursday, 1 March 2007 16:52 (seventeen years ago) link

masturbation without explanation. or compulsory participation.

― anhell*ca, Thursday, 1 March 2007 18:52 (seventeen years ago) link

No fear of being one of those couples I see ALL THE TIME that sit together in pubs, restaurants wherever, in stony silence because there's nothing left to talk about and looking as if their souls have completely withered away. Trapped together out of fear of being single. Fun times.

Have been thinking about this since yesterday. Completely otm.

― Hard like armour, Thursday, 1 March 2007 21:59 (seventeen years ago) link

Yeah, dudes, stay out of relationships in case you can't walk away from a shit one? Good theory.

(I am glad, also, that you have such insight into silence. We often sit in a comfortable silence, never thinking what it looks like to others)

― ailsa, Thursday, 1 March 2007 22:44 (seventeen years ago) link

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