The Missionary Position

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DAMN ALL MY ASSIGNMENTS THAT WERE DUE TODAY

― M Matos (M Matos), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 11:56 (twenty-one years ago) link

OK, something Jordan said above (haha) got me wondering: What position did you all lose your virginity in? Me: missionary, with a woman who didn’t really like anything else, unfortunately. (I don’t generally either, though there have been times when it was extremely gratifying, not to mention it’s the position I climax easiest in.)

Also, in my humble (miniscule) experience, m.p. generally worked very well for clitoral stimulation via (a) she holding her legs together while I put my knees outside of them, and (b) thrusting downward rather than up.

― M Matos (M Matos), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 12:10 (twenty-one years ago) link

< /more information than you ever wanted to know about me>

― M Matos (M Matos), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 12:10 (twenty-one years ago) link

can we go back to sweets now?

― g-kit (g-kit), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 12:15 (twenty-one years ago) link

Woman on top re; Matos' q.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 12:23 (twenty-one years ago) link

re; Matos' q.

the mish.

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 12:25 (twenty-one years ago) link

(As nobody else has chimed in with it so far...)

A finger of fudge is just enough to give your kids a treat

― Alan (Alan), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 12:26 (twenty-one years ago) link

the mish
http://www.musicfolio.com/modernrock/Mission_uk.jpg

― Jerry the Nipper (Jerrynipper), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 12:29 (twenty-one years ago) link

"the mish"! yes! I'm calling it that FROM NOW ON!

― M Matos (M Matos), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 12:30 (twenty-one years ago) link

glad i could be of some help

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 12:31 (twenty-one years ago) link

Now it has everything

Nope, it hasn't Reached Rock Bottom yet.

― Madchen (Madchen), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 12:35 (twenty-one years ago) link

Now it has everything

Nope, it hasn't Reached Rock Bottom yet.

I can't really remember. It was years ago and I was on my way back from playgroup.

Will that do?

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 12:37 (twenty-one years ago) link

well, having a rock bottom is yet another argument for the mish....

― M Matos (M Matos), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 12:41 (twenty-one years ago) link

Famous rock bottoms: Morrissey? Ummm...

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 12:43 (twenty-one years ago) link

"Rock Bottom" is a great record.

― Andrew Thames (Andrew Thames), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 12:52 (twenty-one years ago) link

Homosexual piss-orgy flavoured icecream?

...

― Andrew (enneff), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 12:56 (twenty-one years ago) link

Surely that's rock bottom?

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 12:59 (twenty-one years ago) link

i just bought some fruit gums (nestle, but what can you do). Going against the law of sweet nostalgia, these things are MUCH bigger then i remember. they were smaller, not so "tall" with rounded sides (tho obv round from "above" which is different). These new kids are taller with flat sides. they're still much the same with gum/tooth havoc causing.

― Alan (Alan), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 13:25 (twenty-one years ago) link

they are also not as hard as they used to be. You really had to suck them to get them to soften in the old days.

(puns not really intended, but what can you do?)

― Ed (dali), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 13:28 (twenty-one years ago) link

what can you do but nestle? = great title for a song

― mark s (mark s), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 13:28 (twenty-one years ago) link

ts: fruit gums shaped like gums vs fruit gums shaped like fruits

― mark s (mark s), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 13:29 (twenty-one years ago) link

ed, possibly we are better suckers than we were.

― Alan (Alan), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 13:31 (twenty-one years ago) link

they are also less shiny.

YOu can recreate the good old days by buying fruit gums from a particularly cold sweet shop.

― Ed (dali), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 13:32 (twenty-one years ago) link

shininess. u r rite.

― Alan (Alan), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 13:34 (twenty-one years ago) link

The lioness looks v. bored. And why are they doing it doggy style? I mean, they are CATS for god's sake. How embarassing!

I lost my virginity in the m.p. It's only gotten better since.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 13:55 (twenty-one years ago) link

A finger of fudge is just enough to give your kids a treat

This thread has reached child bottom.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 13:55 (twenty-one years ago) link

And is currently groping.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 13:56 (twenty-one years ago) link

Surely that's rock bottom?
-- Jody Beth Rosen (edito...), February 26th, 2003.

http://swc.sports-gaming.com/wm2002/images/WM4.jpg

― ken, Wednesday, 26 February 2003 15:10 (twenty-one years ago) link

when you feel like you've had it up to here, and you're mad enough to scream, but you're sad enough to tear... that's rock bottom.

― g-kit (g-kit), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 15:26 (twenty-one years ago) link

The above picture does not show Rock Bottom, it shows Stone-Cold Steve Austin Bottom.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 18:32 (twenty-one years ago) link

It's about to be a Rock Bottom though isn't it? A proto Rock Bottom?

Realises that have let ILE world know I have some acquaintance with sports-entertainment

― Dave B (daveb), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 18:45 (twenty-one years ago) link

It's about to hit Rock Penis.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 19:35 (twenty-one years ago) link

It's a spunky thread. It's got a way to go yet.

― Lara (Lara), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 19:38 (twenty-one years ago) link

that's a rock bottom alright, not as showy as the people's elbow.

― Ed (dali), Wednesday, 26 February 2003 20:41 (twenty-one years ago) link

old-fashioned boiled sweets

I've always wondered what these were.

Getting back to the subject*, is the man-stands-between-woman's-legs position still considered missionary?

*Whatever it is. There was an original subject, right? We didn't suddenly start talking about candy, lions fucking, and Kate for no reason, right?

― Christine "Green Leafy Dragon" Indigo (cindigo), Thursday, 27 February 2003 02:13 (twenty-one years ago) link

I don't see how that could possibly be considered the missionary position.

― N. (nickdastoor), Thursday, 27 February 2003 02:25 (twenty-one years ago) link

I'm trying to work out what the woman is doing while the man is standing between her legs. Is she lying down? Standing up? Washing the dishes? Doing the hoovering? Fixing a car?

― Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 27 February 2003 02:42 (twenty-one years ago) link

"Rock Bottom" is a great record.

er...

tired of friction, tired of wishin
tired of doing it only in the missionary position

― g*bbneb (gabbneb), Thursday, 27 February 2003 05:59 (twenty-one years ago) link

well, have you guys and girls tried the italian chandelier? did your muscles survive the ordeal?

― nathalie (nathalie), Thursday, 27 February 2003 09:28 (twenty-one years ago) link

tired of friction, tired of wishin
tired of doing it only in the missionary position

this made me laugh, even though i am sad. thanks.
(wrong song, tho...)

― g-kit (g-kit), Thursday, 27 February 2003 10:56 (twenty-one years ago) link

I don't think it has a title track, anyway. It's by Robert Wyatt, I thought it might be redundant to say

― Andrew Thames (Andrew Thames), Thursday, 27 February 2003 11:23 (twenty-one years ago) link

zuh. i got confused, fuckhead that i am. ignore me.

― g-kit (g-kit), Thursday, 27 February 2003 11:31 (twenty-one years ago) link

I'm trying to work out what the woman is doing while the man is standing between her legs. Is she lying down?

Lying down on a bed or other flat surface. It's my husbands' and my favorite position.

― Christine "Green Leafy Dragon" Indigo (cindigo), Thursday, 27 February 2003 13:04 (twenty-one years ago) link

There are a lot of variations to the MP so don't knock it. Also, it is also a good position to be in if you want to pull out and splat on the bird's belly.

― Enormous Genitals, Thursday, 27 February 2003 13:08 (twenty-one years ago) link

welcome to the too much information thread.

― g-kit (g-kit), Thursday, 27 February 2003 13:19 (twenty-one years ago) link

EG, you are a disgrace to our people.

― Ivor Biggun, Thursday, 27 February 2003 13:35 (twenty-one years ago) link

There are a lot of variations to the MP so don't knock it. Also, it is also a good position to be in if you want to pull out and splat on the bird's belly.

That would be rock bottom, right?

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 27 February 2003 14:29 (twenty-one years ago) link

Yup.

― Lara (Lara), Thursday, 27 February 2003 14:36 (twenty-one years ago) link

nine months pass...

Re-reading this thread has made my stomach hurt with laughter.

― Dave B (daveb), Friday, 28 November 2003 14:20 (twenty years ago) link

variations of it rock!

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Friday, 28 November 2003 14:30 (twenty years ago) link

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