i mean it's like, i have had plenty of good threads, why is this The One
― j lol (surm), Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:22 (twelve years ago) link
(note: i will not actually do this)
― lemon kerrang! (jjjusten), Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:22 (twelve years ago) link
:)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=angi1vwUkQc
― Pleasant Plains, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:24 (twelve years ago) link
" racism, sexism, lol fat people, lesbians are ugly, and watersports "
riyl: dane cook dvds.
― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:25 (twelve years ago) link
it has to do with a friend of mine's 21st birthday. it's like 1:00 (bar close is 2:15 here) and he decides that we all have to go to a strip club. being his birthday we have to say yes so we head on out there. he is nearly blackout drunk by this point. has a few more drinks there and someone buys him a lap dance. after a couple of minutes we hear a scream and the guy bolts for the bathroom. he's yelling "I'm so sorry! I couldn't hold it!" which is funny to us until we realize what we're actually laughing at. he actually vomitted on the stripper while she was grinding on him. obviously everyone in the bar starts giving us death stares and the bouncer says "as soon as he's done in there, you guys are out of here". understandable. we frantically discussed, "how much should we tip her for this??" the conclusion was that it had to be at least $100. i don't think this situation is outlined anywhere. i think that tipping $20 is worse than tipping nothing, but how much is enough to make her feel even a little bit forgiving, or is there no amount? then I realized, if this was like Vegas or something, the tip would have to be at least a grand, wouldn't it?
― frogbs, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:26 (twelve years ago) link
how many people in birthday party were black
― ☂ (max), Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:27 (twelve years ago) link
enjoy an sb from me 2 u
― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:28 (twelve years ago) link
give it a rest man
― frogbs, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:29 (twelve years ago) link
*makes obligatory nick cave ref so none of you nerds have to*
― lemon kerrang! (jjjusten), Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:29 (twelve years ago) link
Man I'm getting Deja Vu from this.
― Pleasant Plains, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:30 (twelve years ago) link
right?
― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:30 (twelve years ago) link
imho yesterday was more deserving of an sb for the casual reference, glad i didn't save it for today
― jon /via/ chi 2.0, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:31 (twelve years ago) link
casual "racism" that should read
― jon /via/ chi 2.0, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:32 (twelve years ago) link
well i had to work yesterday so if you wanna pretend i did it yesterday by all means
― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:32 (twelve years ago) link
close your eyesgive me your hand, darlingdo you feel my sides heavingdo you understandaching sides and allam I only dreamingor is this burningan eternal lol
― chupacabra - a delicious burrito (DJP), Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:32 (twelve years ago) link
imo the story would have been much better if the stripper had done the puking
― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:34 (twelve years ago) link
A very merry suggest ban to you!
http://www.alice-in-wonderland.net/layoutpics/characters/mad-hatter-disney.jpg
― Shart Shaped Box (Phil D.), Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:34 (twelve years ago) link
also if the stripper had been wearing a trucker hat
― chupacabra - a delicious burrito (DJP), Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:36 (twelve years ago) link
someone trying to steal the inappropriate puking in a sexual situation story crown
― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:37 (twelve years ago) link
that story was actually much less awful than i expected
― lemon kerrang! (jjjusten), Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:37 (twelve years ago) link
my first read thru of that winning post had me convinced it wasn't puke that he couldn't hold in
― jon /via/ chi 2.0, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:37 (twelve years ago) link
I kind of like the idea of a Highlander-esque battle over this
― chupacabra - a delicious burrito (DJP), Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:39 (twelve years ago) link
wouldn't lower myself to puke-jousting in a public arena tbh
― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:40 (twelve years ago) link
story does not seem SB-worthy
― Mr. Patrick Batman (WmC), Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:41 (twelve years ago) link
i really want to know how people would answer this question though
― frogbs, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:42 (twelve years ago) link
obviously i have no idea what is or isn't, didn't San Te catch a bunch of shit for posting a gross strip club story
some of us don't have to pay for the chance to puke on people so idk what to tell you froggy
― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:43 (twelve years ago) link
i would answer this question with "i never have to think about this situation"
― lemon kerrang! (jjjusten), Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:44 (twelve years ago) link
i mean i am as big a fan of thought experiments as the next guy but eh this one
losing my faith in frogbs, all that build up and
― dayo, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:51 (twelve years ago) link
it was like all the anticipation and anti-climactic mess cleaning of a lapdance than ends in puke
― jon /via/ chi 2.0, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:52 (twelve years ago) link
what were you expecting?
― frogbs, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:56 (twelve years ago) link
something with a little more pizazz
― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:57 (twelve years ago) link
something with a little more jizz, azz
― Lamp, Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:58 (twelve years ago) link
Not going to criticise, it's not like I have a better stripper vomit story to tell. Thanks for sharing.
― i wanna be yr rhizome (seandalai), Thursday, 23 June 2011 16:59 (twelve years ago) link
I fell in love with vomited on a stripper
― dayo, Thursday, 23 June 2011 17:00 (twelve years ago) link
maybe it ends with you being chased down the street by an angry bouncer (played by ving rhames? make a production note for the next meeting) and you stumble into ANOTHER strip club to hide and there you meet a stripper with a heart of gold who rebuffs your advances at first but eventually learns to love you, as you learn to love little horace, the six-year-old wisecracking genius son she's forced to strip for in order to pay for private school in a better neighborhood.
― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Thursday, 23 June 2011 17:00 (twelve years ago) link
i'm just spitballing here. we could also probably get the fat guy from my name is earl for the bouncer if rhames is too expensive.
― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Thursday, 23 June 2011 17:01 (twelve years ago) link
i think the bouncer needs to be black, otherwise he wont really seem threatening enough, the audience wld wonder why a cool tough guy wld even bother running and not like, punching the bouncer out.
also i do think its impt that we establish a fair market price for getting vomited on while at work
― Lamp, Thursday, 23 June 2011 17:03 (twelve years ago) link
the movie would be called "Five Thousand Bucks" which is the amount frogbs's friend needs to come up with in order to keep the puked-on stripper's boyfriend from kicking the crap out of him. the climatic moment comes when he's forced to decide whether to steal the five grand from little horace's private school fund or take his beating like a man.
― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Thursday, 23 June 2011 17:05 (twelve years ago) link
if a friend barfed on a stripper, i think i'd probably leave a couple 20s on the table and hit the door pronto. then again, i've only been to a strip club once (at a family member's bachelor party), and left quickly without the goad of barf, so what do i know?
― And the piano, it sounds like a carnivore (contenderizer), Thursday, 23 June 2011 17:07 (twelve years ago) link
seriously thinking about spending my two days off writing this script
― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Thursday, 23 June 2011 17:08 (twelve years ago) link
frogbs i promise to cut you in on the profits if we can get apatow interested
― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Thursday, 23 June 2011 17:09 (twelve years ago) link
How much does she make per dance and how many will she miss while she cleans up? Factor that in plus at least a 40% disgust fee.
― Pleasant Plains, Thursday, 23 June 2011 17:09 (twelve years ago) link
strongo in case you didnt know ilx poster 'max' and i are bigshot hollywood producers: ANNOUNCEMENT - CALL FOR PITCHES - MAX AND LAMP FILM PRODUCTION COMPANY LLC & i think wed be very interested in your script
― Lamp, Thursday, 23 June 2011 17:12 (twelve years ago) link
It was $20 or $30 I think, plus it was the end of the night so I would think she's got like one more in her. I like the calculation but there's gotta be like a $100 minimum there
― frogbs, Thursday, 23 June 2011 17:15 (twelve years ago) link
you are a prince among mathemagicians
― lemon kerrang! (jjjusten), Thursday, 23 June 2011 17:24 (twelve years ago) link
so happy
― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Thursday, 23 June 2011 18:16 (twelve years ago) link
i hope this movie gets super famous and gets a "hangover 2" type sequel. "i can't believe you puked on ANOTHER stripper's tits, dude! man, we are in for it now"
― frogbs, Thursday, 23 June 2011 18:20 (twelve years ago) link