Acceptable or Unacceptable: Coffeeshops that refuse to serve Espresso-over-ice

xpost goole: concert arenas that serve hotdogs, nachos etc usually have a little stand nearby with kethcup, mustard, onions, jalapenos etc as hotdog/nacho toppings/condiments

cheapskate hippies would make salad from the condiments and eat it as a meal because they are lame

that is nasty enough to serve as its own punishment

onion and jalapeño salad w ketchup and mustard dressing sounds good

the original 'vegan hotdog'

stay away from me dayo, u dirty hippie

the opposite of a loyalty card, but i can't think how it would work yet

Every fourth espresso on ice w/half and half, the barista gets to kick you in the crotch.

americano is my drink yo

I never understand those

If the bean/roast isn't too dark/bitter, the best thing about an espresso is the crema, and diluting that with water ruins the taste

On the one hand, you're totally right. On the other hand, you overestimate the sensitivity of the average US coffee palate.

latte girl, me. no mess, no fuss.

a mocha if I'm feeling fancy.

it's just a different drink. espressos are delicious. americanos are like coffee but tastier.

drip coffee gives me cramping sometimes, lattes are a bit gentler on me (sorry baout tmi)

So, people have a shocked espresso in the morning and a martini with bruised gin in the evening?

i pretty much prefer a black coffee made in the japanese slowly poured drippy filter cone style than the italian espresso style nowadays. tho i like both.

re the savages topping up their espressos over ice, my whole thing is half the time they're adding half-n-half to it. Like, loads of it. Which has to taste beyond foul.

"Sir, it's clear that you hate coffee in all forms...wtf are u even doing here"

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 26 June 2012 20:05 (39 minutes ago) Permalink

Which is exactly how I feel about people who order iced lattes! If you'e going to serve a shot of espresso drowned in milk and ice to the point that you can no longer taste anything other than a vague hint of coffee, why get snobby when people want iced espresso? Because you're a cheapskate cafe owner who wants to do a giant markup on adding milk, that's why, and don't bullshit me about it. Steamed milk over ice is even worse - that's fucking disgusting.

My dad always drinks his coffee w/loads of milk and sugar and I always tease him that what he really wants is melted coffee ice cream.

For that matter, why offer sugar? Let alone splenda or equal, yeesh.

feel like this is the thread that will finally lead to the destruction of ilx

this thread is like a cozy ilx blanket

I don't really do iced drinks. Maybe a blended one on a really, seriously hot day but otherwise hot coffee for me always

this thread is like a cozy ilx blanket

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, June 26, 2012 10:03 PM (6 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

totally, a bit of simulated controversy for a quiet day

also coffee, who among us does not love to drink and talk about coffee

the question is, do you even tip the barista once he refuses?

this thread - A COZY BLANKET OR THE SEED OF DESTRUCTION?

sorry, i just want to make things as dramatic as possible here

A COZY BLANKET OF DESTRUCTION

i like how when i searched for a picture of the COZY BLANKETS full of influenza that were the SEEDS OF DESTRUCTION for the north american indians, it appeared on this page

http://espressostalinist.wordpress.com/genocide/native-american-genocide/

ITT: espresso rockism

i hadn't really thought of this before, but my pov so far:
* refusing on the basis that it leads to a shitty drink is dumb, let people drink shitty drinks if they want to, especially if they're going to pay you for it
* however, people cheating and making bad but slightly cheaper iced lattes out of iced espresso and cream is pretty bad, so refusing on these grounds seems valid
* MOST IMPORTANTLY coffee shops that make "iced coffee" by pouring hot coffee over ice should be burned to the ground so i can urinate on the ashes

catering solely to people with impeccable taste (ie refusing to sell iced espresso because it's bad for the espresso) in a market dependent on $3 and $4 purchases seems like a terrible business model in the u.s. in 2012

are we tucking this cozy blanket over our feet tho?

Acceptable because the only thing funnier than people asking for iced espresso is barisas getting all mad about it.

i can't believe i used to be a barista

baristas getting all mad about it is WAY funnier than people asking for it

I'm not the first one to notice this, but as the indie/alt cultural demographic gets older they've transferred music snobbishness to artisinal coffee and food. I missed being insulted at a record store, but now I can be denigrated at a coffee bar!

that's kind of like when i went into the fancy deli and asked for american cheese and they got upset

even so.....once the customer says they want bad coffee, there is surely a ritual for giving them bad coffee, a series of stuttered/monotone areyousures, an awkward clunking of ice, the mordant stares of coffee lovers nearby, the customer's hurried shamed exit and the absolution of normal service being resumed

*this* is some glorious stuff, and I feel compelled to put a mark in the sand/grounds to say so.

One of the things now with shops in my area seems to be not serving ANYTHING decaf. I can kind of understand not doing decaf espresso because you need a whole separate grinder and group head and everything, and it tends not to be as good, but I don't see the big deal about having a little drip pot of decaf or offering it french press. Or at least have some goddamned herbal tea! But it's probably for the best, no reason to waste money at coffee shops at night.

are we tucking this cozy blanket over our feet tho?

You are if you're sleeping with me.

Acceptable because the only thing funnier than people asking for iced espresso is barisas getting all mad about it.

agreed! also this reminds me of this ridic blowup: http://boingboing.net/2008/07/19/murky-coffees-owner.html

also reminds me of this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JtmOTYmVNII

"No. She is a criminal, I want to talk to her"

* MOST IMPORTANTLY coffee shops that make "iced coffee" by pouring hot coffee over ice should be burned to the ground so i can urinate on the ashes

― congratulations (n/a), Tuesday, June 26, 2012 5:24 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark

yah but is it acceptable to urinate on the ashes over ice

sometimes i make iced coffee that way why because it is easy

what's difference between iced coffee and thai iced tea? powder?

I have over the years veered into coffee-snobbery in certain areas...but til today I never knew that espresso shots over ice was such a verboten thing with certain baristas (stealing cream aside)

so having said that, I have a really dumb question: are coffee snobs saying that no-one should have iced espresso drinks at all? or is there an acceptable coffee snob way of making them that doesn't involve pouring them over ice?

I've never heard of a chilled espresso, but you can get a ristretto

ristretto's just short shots, how is that cold?

(imagine that phrased in a way that *doesn't* sound crabby, sorry dayo)

I'm sorry I meant macchiato

third time's a charm?