Birth Control: Advice and Anecdotes

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I almost want to take the one that uses "There She Goes" in their ad, and I'm really on the fence about the one that shows a woman going on "bad" dates and being dropped off at home and going in alone every time...UNTIL THE LAST ONE, MR RIGHT. It's cheesy and sort of pretends that it's her "first time"...?, but on the other hand it DOES allow her to choose a sexual partner without imposing the marriage assumption. Really I wish there was NO narrative at all but LOL ADVERTIZING etc.

― Laurel, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 16:12 (seventeen years ago) link

I should have elaborated: It's cheesy and etc but it DOES portray a woman planning ahead w/o guilt or secrecy and making independent sexual choices without imposing etc etc.

― Laurel, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 16:17 (seventeen years ago) link

For awhile I was on the short period one that featured the girl visiting pill sites on her laptop and then meeting her indie rock boyfriend downstairs. gag.

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 16:17 (seventeen years ago) link

I was "de-nutted" a couple of years ago, and quickly realized that I should have done it YEARS ago.

― peepee, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 16:20 (seventeen years ago) link

x-post
that girl is super hot in a donna from that 70s show kinda way

― sunny successor, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 16:28 (seventeen years ago) link

laurel that "there she goes" ad kind of freaks me out because I assume everytime they sing "there she goes again" means she having sex again, which is fine, but the song gets stuck in my head all day long.

― sunny successor, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 16:30 (seventeen years ago) link

my gf swears by the ring

― deej, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 16:39 (seventeen years ago) link

The idea of birth control adverts is freaky, I mean tampon adverts are bad enough.Then again the two times I've been to America I was slightly freaked out by all the medical advertising in general ("What are you doing Sally Fields?! I DON'T WANT TO KNOW.")

I've been told I'm sick to often to use the pill and I'm worried about the smoking thing and the family history of breast cancer thing, so that cuts out a lot of the hormonal ones, plus I've had too many friends say what Rumpie said: ie that hormonal contraception made them feel somehow 'other'. Condoms it is. My boyfriend's cool with it, just wish they weren't so bloody expensive (yet cheaper than babies, so I perservere.)

― Anna, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 16:50 (seventeen years ago) link

Condoms cost more than the pill?

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 17:05 (seventeen years ago) link

haha depends how much sex u have

― deej, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 17:06 (seventeen years ago) link

I don't know actually Sam, I've never taken the pill for the mentioned vomiting reason. I assume not as I think you can get the pill on the NHS, or at least subsidised, but you'd have to ask a Britisher who uses it. Condoms are around £8.00 for ten.

― Anna, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 17:14 (seventeen years ago) link

I was on the pill when I lived in England and it was free. I was amazed.

― ENBB, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 17:15 (seventeen years ago) link

Yeah that sounds pretty high although I haven't bought condoms in awhile so am not sure how much they are here. My pills are $25 a mth with insurance. I'm certain we don't have sex often enough to match the amount per use you seem to be getting.

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 17:16 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh, the "there she goes again" ad weirds me out a bit because of the LOLZ HEROIN SONG aspect.

I recently advised a girlfriend to try the ring because of this thread!

― tokyo rosemary, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 17:32 (seventeen years ago) link

that song is stuck in my head now. thanks.

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 17:33 (seventeen years ago) link

no problem

― tokyo rosemary, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 17:35 (seventeen years ago) link

I wasn't speaking directly to you, R/Z, I think it was Sunny's fault! :)

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 17:36 (seventeen years ago) link

If I were to switch from pills to ring (as I'm currently contemplating), is it possible that I'll go through the horrible "going off the pill" symptoms? I don't want to cry all the time, or feel terribly bloated.

― molly mummenschanz, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 17:40 (seventeen years ago) link

my gf swears by the ring

-- deej, Tuesday, May 1, 2007 11:39 AM (1 hour ago)

Yep, mine too.

― jaymc, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 17:50 (seventeen years ago) link

molly, you shouldn't go through any symptoms unless the hormone doses in your pills are drastically different from the ring? it should be totally ok, like if you were just switching between two brands of pills.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Tuesday, 1 May 2007 17:51 (seventeen years ago) link

http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2005/03/16/rings_wideweb__430x301.jpg

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 17:52 (seventeen years ago) link

these never let me and the wife down, not once, totally painless and simple

― Shakey Mo Collier, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 17:55 (seventeen years ago) link

They seem like a good idea, Shakey, but nonoxynol-9 is a detergent, basically, and can be very drying/irritating to some people.

― Laurel, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:00 (seventeen years ago) link

That's great that has worked for you BUT - VCF is NOT effective enough to be used as the sole means of birth control if you really don't want to conceive. It can be great when used in conjunction with other methods but it has a high failure rate if used alone. I have a friend who got pregnant doing exactly that.

― ENBB, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:02 (seventeen years ago) link

Furthermore, per wikiped, the failure rate over a 6-month period of different concentrations of spermicides, used alone, was between 10 and 20%!! Whoah.

Hah XP

― Laurel, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:03 (seventeen years ago) link

BTW - I do volunteer contraceptive counseling so that's why I know a lot about this kind of thing!

― ENBB, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:05 (seventeen years ago) link

I guess I am just lucky then, cuz we went for 6 years with that as our sole BC and never had a problem. oh well.

― Shakey Mo Collier, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:08 (seventeen years ago) link

Nonoxynol-9 gives me severe lady problems. But, I have reactions to a lot of things, so this is not surprising.

― molly mummenschanz, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:09 (seventeen years ago) link

Every woman's different in terms of fertility (and side effects). We were only using withdrawal for 6 mths with no problem which kind of surprised me. (don't try this kids)

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:09 (seventeen years ago) link

Yeah, I know someone who hasn't had a regular period for almost a decade, and has been having totally unprotected sex all that time (I KNOW) and never had a single pregnancy scare...but then there were some lifestyle changes and some emotional ones, and suddenly she had a monthly cycle and then HI DERE, BAYBE. You never know what your mental state, stress chemicals, etc are doing to your total system.

― Laurel, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:12 (seventeen years ago) link

whoah that's crazy!

― Shakey Mo Collier, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:13 (seventeen years ago) link

I know! She had basically already grieved over, and accustomed herself to, being infertile. So now she's deeply happy to find that she CAN get pregnant but this was not the time for it. Oh well! Babies happen.

― Laurel, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:15 (seventeen years ago) link

A woman my husband and I know recently experienced bad cramps and period so heavy that she went to the emergency room after two days thinking she might have a cyst or something. She was examined and told she was in labor. Her response? "I'm not pregnant!!" Well, she was and now she's a Mom. She spotted monthly throughout the pregnancy and didn't gain any weight of course she also drank and smoked for the duration as well. Anyway - I guess this doesn't have much to do with birth control but Laurel's post about the unpredictability of a woman's cycle reminded me of it. Plus, it's a ridiculous story and I still can't believe this happened to someone we know. Babies happen indeed.

― ENBB, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:21 (seventeen years ago) link

WOW THAT STORY IS THE MOST TERRIFYING STORY I'VE EVER HEARD

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:22 (seventeen years ago) link

damn . ..that is some maury povich type stuff. that would be horrible. . was she using any birth control during that time?

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:23 (seventeen years ago) link

Was there a weight issue in that case as well, E? Seems like, logistically, the only way you could NOT know anything was happening without being in denial so profound that it qualifies as a mental illness would be for a woman's weight/figure to pretty well camouflage the situation.

― Laurel, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:24 (seventeen years ago) link

Yeah, wouldn't you feel all kinds of weird stuff going on in inside? bizarre. . .

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:24 (seventeen years ago) link

i have actually read about stories like this previously, and the woman i read about this happening to was not large at all, like she might've been a size 10, and never gained much weight during the hidden pregnancy. something about the way her uterus was situated in her body was weird? and of course the child was on the small side.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:26 (seventeen years ago) link

As someone who worried for years about birth control only to find that it took 23 months to conceive with no explanation as to why from the doctors (17 of those charting), I don't know what to think about birth control any more!

I think I'll use charting combined with condom use during fertile periods once I've given birth. People who I know who've had 'accidents' while charting haven't really been trying to avoid. It's really quite easy to make sure you don't get pg once you've charted a few cycles, but some people either get too slapdash and take risks, or they quite like the idea of having an 'accident'

― Vicky, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:26 (seventeen years ago) link

I've done the pregnancy thing twice and can't imagine not realizing... wow. Just the breast size change would have tipped me off immediately. But at the end, all the kicking! That is amazing.

― Sara R-C, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:27 (seventeen years ago) link

I KNOW! She's the worst possible person this could happen to as well. Works in a bar, lives in a room above said bar, no money, lots of drink/drugs etc., not really stable. I hope it all works out but it's completely CRAZY. A couple of her good friends went to see her in the hospital and as a joke, one brought condoms. That didn't really go down well. Could you even imagine?! She didn't have a crib - nothing!!

She's not big at all but not super skinny either. I haven't seen her in ages (this is a friend from UK) but another of our friends saw her two days before the birth and said she looked thinner than usual.

What MM asked is what I don't understand - I can't believe you wouldn't feel that something was just different somehow.

A friend of ours who is visiting told us about this the other night and I'm still just in shock.

― ENBB, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:29 (seventeen years ago) link

how could you forget until now on this thread! hahaha I would have come to ILX the very next day and started a thread just for that story.

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:29 (seventeen years ago) link

I know. I haven't been around much before today with houseguest and crazy work stuff!

But, seriously! Completely nuts, right?

― ENBB, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:31 (seventeen years ago) link

BTW - I don't know what kind of birth control she was using at the time. She basically started seeing a guy right around the time of what would have been conception but had been dating a bit so she's not entirely sure who the father is.

― ENBB, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:32 (seventeen years ago) link

This story gets scarier by the second.

― Sara R-C, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:35 (seventeen years ago) link

I know, it's shocking. I almost feel worse for the baby!

― ENBB, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:36 (seventeen years ago) link

I've known people who didn't gain ANY apparent weight in any part of their bodies besides the abdomen, ie from the back or the waist up looked totally not-pregnant, but there was still a bulge of SOME size in front!! And one of them was very, very nauseated all throughout, so eating was almost not an option, she had to check herself in for the last month-ish just to stay healthy. Whatever, anecdotes are just that and no more, but they sure are weird sometimes.

― Laurel, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:36 (seventeen years ago) link

poor kid

http://images.ctv.ca/archives/CTVNews/img2/20061102/160_ap_an_smith_061102.jpg

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:36 (seventeen years ago) link

hello ladies,

i hypothesize that if yr seriously into drink/drugs theres a pretty good chance yr not going to notice/care about/think odd strange things going on with yr body

i have heard of something like this happening but i was a pre-teen & dont trust my memory, it involved my older sisters classmate intentionally & successfully hiding her pregnancy until birth

― deeznuts, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:37 (seventeen years ago) link

Seriously. The one thing I'm hoping is that it'll make her straighten her life out and she'll surprise everyone who knows her.
Laurel, I too have never seen a woman who didn't show at least a little but I guess it does happen!

xpost

― ENBB, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 18:39 (seventeen years ago) link

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