Front page: social workers say Kate Moss is not fit to be a parent
p4: We should boycott shops that sell "inappropriate" clothes for children.
p6: Melanie Phillips says our once great education system lies in ruins, and it's all "the left's" fault.
p10-11: "The great fashion week cocaine binge"
p14: leader comment says children bunking off school are all Tony Blair's fault; PLUS — it's terrible that the police won't lock up gypsies.
p17: one cigarette a day TRIPLES your risk of lung cancer (with pic of woman — possibly an irresponsible mother — smoking).
p20: Council tax bills could go up! Oh, the humanity.
p21: Those pesky gyppos again, complete with a "Guess what?" line in the subhead.
p22-23: "They're known as Moss's Posse — the group of louche stars the tarnished supermodel has lured into her amoral world..." Tells us that Jefferson Hack wanted to marry the mother of his child, "but Kate just wanted to party."
p36-37: two pages of victorian photos of kittens dressed as people.
p39: Teachers can't cope with all the pupils in Portsmouth who speak foreign.
p46-47: the "disturbing truth" about the white British women who have sex with black men in the Gambia.
p49: "Ruthless, career-minded women. An underclass of weak, emasculated men."
p54: The "dark side" of Harvey Nichols.
And so and so forth.
Sometimes it's hard to tell if they're taking the piss...
― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Thursday, 22 September 2005 06:14 (eighteen years ago) link
― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Thursday, 22 September 2005 06:17 (eighteen years ago) link
― Last Of The Famous International Pfunkboys (Kerr), Thursday, 22 September 2005 06:21 (eighteen years ago) link
― CharlieNo4 (Charlie), Thursday, 22 September 2005 06:26 (eighteen years ago) link
― Forest Pines (ForestPines), Thursday, 22 September 2005 06:28 (eighteen years ago) link
Free copy in the office. So there.
My grandad has read the Mail every day for the past 65 years. It shows, too.
― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Thursday, 22 September 2005 06:31 (eighteen years ago) link
This is clearly the greatest newspaper of all time. Photos please.
― gypsy mothra (gypsy mothra), Thursday, 22 September 2005 06:33 (eighteen years ago) link
― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Thursday, 22 September 2005 06:37 (eighteen years ago) link
― Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 22 September 2005 06:39 (eighteen years ago) link
― Last Of The Famous International Pfunkboys (Kerr), Thursday, 22 September 2005 06:39 (eighteen years ago) link
"We only play guitar based pop and rock" she kept repeating.
"Surely Cliff is guitar based rock?" I asked.
"Not really", she said.
― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Thursday, 22 September 2005 06:46 (eighteen years ago) link
Apparently not. Harry Whittier Smith claimed to pose live kittens using "only patient, unfailing kindness."
Though today's two-page Mail exposé reveals that for some of the pics he may have actually just pushed their heads through backdrops.
― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Thursday, 22 September 2005 06:49 (eighteen years ago) link
― Forest Pines (ForestPines), Thursday, 22 September 2005 06:51 (eighteen years ago) link
― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Thursday, 22 September 2005 06:52 (eighteen years ago) link
― Forest Pines (ForestPines), Thursday, 22 September 2005 06:57 (eighteen years ago) link
This edition of the DM is lacking one classic DM ingredient which is the serialisation of a book revealing secrets of the universe, eg. The Crystal Skull, The Bible Code etc. I recommend Who Built The Moon?
― Tom (Groke), Thursday, 22 September 2005 06:58 (eighteen years ago) link
― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:09 (eighteen years ago) link
― The Brocade Fire (kate), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:11 (eighteen years ago) link
― Forest Pines (ForestPines), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:16 (eighteen years ago) link
However, these days I read the Times and the Sun, so maybe I am turning into a rightie.
― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:19 (eighteen years ago) link
"p20: Council tax bills could go up! Oh, the humanity," and possibly
"p39: Teachers can't cope with all the pupils in Portsmouth who speak foreign."
aren't necessarily loony.
― N_RQ, Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:32 (eighteen years ago) link
Now there's a paper I wouldn't mind reading.
― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:33 (eighteen years ago) link
xxpost
― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:35 (eighteen years ago) link
many Daily Mail readers. not actual scientists or anything.
― I'm a Problem for Anthony Blair (noodle vague), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:37 (eighteen years ago) link
― RickyT (RickyT), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:38 (eighteen years ago) link
p17: IT'S IN YOUR GENES YOU WOULD HAVE GOT IT ANYWAY THEY'RE HAVING SEX AND YOU GAVE IT UP IN 1978 GET OVER IT
p20: PEOPLE EXPECTED TO PAY FOR SERVICES THEY RECEIVE SHOCK HORROR YOUTH CULT PROBE
― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:39 (eighteen years ago) link
― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:40 (eighteen years ago) link
― I'm a Problem for Anthony Blair (noodle vague), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:40 (eighteen years ago) link
― The Brocade Fire (kate), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:41 (eighteen years ago) link
― The Brocade Fire (kate), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:42 (eighteen years ago) link
― N_RQ, Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:42 (eighteen years ago) link
― I'm a Problem for Anthony Blair (noodle vague), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:43 (eighteen years ago) link
― I'm a Problem for Anthony Blair (noodle vague), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:44 (eighteen years ago) link
― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:44 (eighteen years ago) link
I don't find either of those particularly objectionable, although the rest of the list is pretty shitty. DOES THIS MAKE ME A BAD LIBERAL.
― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:44 (eighteen years ago) link
― I'm a Problem for Anthony Blair (noodle vague), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:46 (eighteen years ago) link
― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:47 (eighteen years ago) link
― I'm a Problem for Anthony Blair (noodle vague), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:47 (eighteen years ago) link
― Hello Sunshine (Hello Sunshine), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:48 (eighteen years ago) link
p4: IT'S CALLED CAPITALISM YOU WANTED THATCHER YOU REAP WHAT YOU SOW GET OVER IT
― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:48 (eighteen years ago) link
― I'm a Problem for Anthony Blair (noodle vague), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:49 (eighteen years ago) link
Why aspire to 19th smiling faced, so-gooding, robber barondon?
― Ed (dali), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:50 (eighteen years ago) link
― I'm a Problem for Anthony Blair (noodle vague), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:50 (eighteen years ago) link
― N_RQ, Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:51 (eighteen years ago) link
This is idiocy, of course, but it comes from an expected source. A rather less expected source is Stephen Malkmus, who, in the current edition of Index magazine, says it's nice to be in Portland rather than New York, then adds "But the west coast has a downside too, like the number of ridiculous leftists..." He then recounts an anecdote of wanting to shove one of said leftists up against a wall. So that's what "Pig Lib" meant!
― Momus (Momus), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:51 (eighteen years ago) link
― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:52 (eighteen years ago) link
― Ed (dali), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:52 (eighteen years ago) link
And so say, errrrrrrrrrr, some of us!
― Raymond Douglas Dadaismus (Dada), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:53 (eighteen years ago) link
I blame the abolition of Old Labour.
― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:53 (eighteen years ago) link
Malkmus made snidey comments about "leftists" on "Embassy Row" years back. He's probably worried they'd make him get his haircut and stop mumbling.
― I'm a Problem for Anthony Blair (noodle vague), Thursday, 22 September 2005 07:54 (eighteen years ago) link
(I posted this to FB earlier - here seems like a good place to share.)
The Daily Mail used to own a regional newspaper publishing company called Northcliffe Media. One of Northcliffe’s titles was the Nottingham Post, for whom I freelanced between 2006 and 2014. Its website was also under Northcliffe’s control, and built to a standard model. This included scanning all uploaded content for profanities, and replacing any banned words with an equivalent number of asterisks.
The profanity filters operated regardless of context. So, when I described Azealia Banks as wearing a pussy-blow blouse, the website rendered it as *****-bow. And when, reviewing a ska gig, I talked of the crowd skanking, it was translated as *****ing. How readers’ imaginations must have boggled.
Leading and trailing spaces were ignored, too, with delicious consequences. Another reviewer, writing up a Miles Kane gig, mentioned the singer’s monobrow. On the website, it became a mo***row. Reviewing Arthur Brown, I noted his cover of Fleetwood Mac’s “Green Manalishi”. Hey presto: “Green M****ishi”.
In 2012, Charlotte Church came to town. Kicking against her previous media incarnations, she had just “gone indie”, and was writing songs inspired by her rough treatment at the hands of the press. One number dealt with her appearance at the Leveson inquiry into press standards. On stage, she sarcastically dedicated it to Paul Dacre. Or, as the website had it, **** *****.
Somewhere on a Northcliffe server, there must have been a file with the words "pussy", "skank", "nob", "anal" and "Paul Dacre". The thought of this tickled me no end. It still does.
― mike t-diva, Friday, 8 June 2018 11:50 (five years ago) link
Should send that one to Private Eye, I'm sure they're penning a suitable tribute right now.
― Mark G, Friday, 8 June 2018 12:42 (five years ago) link
You're right; I just have.
― mike t-diva, Friday, 8 June 2018 13:54 (five years ago) link
They like it!
― mike t-diva, Friday, 8 June 2018 17:39 (five years ago) link
cool!
― calzino, Friday, 8 June 2018 17:40 (five years ago) link
Awesome, I might have to buy a copy now!
― We can be herpes (Tom D.), Friday, 8 June 2018 17:43 (five years ago) link
ex+
― Mark G, Friday, 8 June 2018 20:35 (five years ago) link
Francis likes it, he's having a word with Ian.
― mike t-diva, Friday, 8 June 2018 21:06 (five years ago) link
heh, look forward to seeing this in print!
― CARL MARKS PRINCIPAL INVESTING AND ADVISORY SERVICES (bizarro gazzara), Friday, 8 June 2018 21:18 (five years ago) link
Seems like a long time ago I worked in the daily mail building probably because it was. Why didn't I stab Simon heffer to death when I had the chance. Tbh I didn't have a knife on me
― Colonel Poo, Friday, 8 June 2018 21:18 (five years ago) link
you could have bludgeoned the cunt with a fire extinguisher ffs!
― calzino, Friday, 8 June 2018 21:23 (five years ago) link
I was in a lift with the cunt, don't think was anything heavy enough to hand
― Colonel Poo, Friday, 8 June 2018 21:31 (five years ago) link
Who actually buys Simon Heffer books? I just want to bring back book-burning and gulags, nothing unreasonable.
― calzino, Friday, 8 June 2018 21:35 (five years ago) link
He writes books? Jesus. Now I feel worse for not beating him to death with my shoes
― Colonel Poo, Friday, 8 June 2018 21:36 (five years ago) link
They are all about either the British Empire or Victorians, and have an "absolutely fucking riveting" - some cunt from The Mail on their cover.
― calzino, Friday, 8 June 2018 21:39 (five years ago) link
"A Short History of Power" gets 3.2 on goodreads!
― calzino, Friday, 8 June 2018 21:42 (five years ago) link
That was my one chance to make the world a better place
― Colonel Poo, Friday, 8 June 2018 21:45 (five years ago) link
his Short History of Power is 160 pages long. Maybe read it for a hate laugh? No No No No No, not a good idea!
― calzino, Friday, 8 June 2018 21:56 (five years ago) link
I feel like him and Tristam Hunt have much History bantz together, despite their obvious political polarity.
― calzino, Friday, 8 June 2018 22:02 (five years ago) link
What, as in "That's you that is..."
― Mark G, Friday, 8 June 2018 22:49 (five years ago) link
probably, but pointing at pictures of their own parents and cousins or cousins fucked by other cousins and so on - ad infinitum!
― calzino, Friday, 8 June 2018 23:01 (five years ago) link
That Paul Dacre profanity filter story is on Page 9 of this week's Private Eye. Props to Mark G for the nudge.
― mike t-diva, Wednesday, 13 June 2018 10:02 (five years ago) link
awesome!
― the Messi inside (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 13 June 2018 10:05 (five years ago) link
Buying a copy later on.
― We can be herpes (Tom D.), Wednesday, 13 June 2018 10:11 (five years ago) link
Me too!
― Mark G, Wednesday, 13 June 2018 10:43 (five years ago) link
gtf in there, mike!
― calzino, Wednesday, 13 June 2018 11:04 (five years ago) link
Ha, that's great Mike!
― lbi's life of limitless european glamour (Le Bateau Ivre), Wednesday, 13 June 2018 11:06 (five years ago) link
Thanks, I'm well chuffed. I meant to submit that story years ago, but the timing was suddenly perfect.
― mike t-diva, Wednesday, 13 June 2018 12:43 (five years ago) link
amazing, props!
― Neil S, Wednesday, 13 June 2018 12:50 (five years ago) link
just read the story in private eye now - nice work mike!
― CARL MARKS PRINCIPAL INVESTING AND ADVISORY SERVICES (bizarro gazzara), Wednesday, 13 June 2018 13:48 (five years ago) link
The Daily Mail is good now!
― lbi's life of limitless european glamour (Le Bateau Ivre), Wednesday, 24 October 2018 08:29 (five years ago) link
didn't realise Dacre had gone tbh but fuck the Mail
― the Warnock of Clodhop Mountain (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 24 October 2018 08:33 (five years ago) link
it's one of David Cameron and Boris Johnson's Eton contemporaries Geordie Greig at the helm now, so you can be sure that a pivot towards socialism will now happen
― Neil S, Wednesday, 24 October 2018 08:36 (five years ago) link
as if some posh cunt is called Geordie!
― calzino, Wednesday, 24 October 2018 08:56 (five years ago) link
affectionate public school nickname because he visited somewhere north of Sandringham once
― the Warnock of Clodhop Mountain (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 24 October 2018 09:03 (five years ago) link
While Dacre was known for retreating to his Scottish Highlands estate, former Tatler editor Greig prepared for the job by taking a holiday in Zimbabwe, which is being written up for the society magazine by his son Jasper – recently appointed as Tatler’s London editor.The Old Etonian, who has taken fellow Old Etonian Tobyn Andreae with him to be deputy editor, is happy to be photographed at celebrity parties and mixes in the same circles as the Rothermeres...
Seriously, it's like the last hundred years never happened.
― Ned Trifle X, Wednesday, 24 October 2018 09:11 (five years ago) link
the last hundred years didn't happen for the rich iirc
― i’ll hufflepuff i’ll blow you away (bizarro gazzara), Wednesday, 24 October 2018 09:14 (five years ago) link
https://i.redd.it/1i8g8gz7uf941.jpg
― 'Sly Cooper' Movie Breaking Into Theaters In 2016 (bizarro gazzara), Wednesday, 8 January 2020 09:47 (four years ago) link
https://ichef.bbci.co.uk/news/320/cpsprodpb/17504/production/_111229459_dm-frontpage-12march2020.jpg
"Cheltenham and Diabetes Pullouts" is all-time
― fetter, Thursday, 12 March 2020 17:18 (four years ago) link
Notice anything about the children the Daily Mail "edited out", in its attack on Educators today? pic.twitter.com/nnaWVbDFNL— Daniel Kebede (@DanielKebedeNEU) May 15, 2020
two black schoolchildren given the Yezhov cut for the cover.
― calzino, Friday, 15 May 2020 10:21 (three years ago) link
I suspect that only one of these photos will be in tomorrow’s Daily Mail. pic.twitter.com/nqrjwOA5Z1— Francis Wheen (@FrancisWheen) July 2, 2020
― calzino, Thursday, 2 July 2020 21:18 (three years ago) link
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EqZrViYW8AAghJg?format=jpg&name=medium
twin peaks. Oh yes I almost forgot the current Mail editor is a friend of the soon to be convicted (or murdered lol) paedo on the cover
― calzino, Tuesday, 29 December 2020 13:04 (three years ago) link
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EsIHG1jXcAAFJfM?format=jpg&name=large
also see: Why I hate this country distilled into one edition.
― calzino, Tuesday, 19 January 2021 23:05 (three years ago) link
how to avoid giving the DM ad clicks for when you need a rage read session
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/textbased/channel-1/index.html
― mark e, Saturday, 11 September 2021 18:15 (two years ago) link
Hope the cunts go bankrupt
Prince Harry, Sir Elton John, David Furnish, Elizabeth Hurley, Sadie Frost and Baroness Doreen Lawrence have launched a legal action against Associated Newspapers, publishers of The Daily Mail, The Mail on Sunday and the Mail Online.— Daniel Sandford (@BBCDanielS) October 6, 2022
Hamlins LLP said the "unlawful acts alleged to have taken place include:1) The hiring of private investigators to secretly place listening devices inside people’s cars and homes— Daniel Sandford (@BBCDanielS) October 6, 2022
2) The commissioning of individuals to surreptitiously listen into and record people’s live, private telephone calls whilst they were taking place3) The payment of police officials, with corrupt links to private investigators, for inside, sensitive information— Daniel Sandford (@BBCDanielS) October 6, 2022
― barry sito (gyac), Thursday, 6 October 2022 16:25 (one year ago) link
has Doreen Lawrence ever commented on the Daily Mail's "murderers" front page? Not that it makes a difference either way to these scumbags being scumbags, but I've always thought it very strange how it was the Daily Mail who took the biggest risk around the case.
― boxedjoy, Thursday, 6 October 2022 16:49 (one year ago) link
The Mail became interested when it transpired that Neville Lawrence had worked for the Dacres as a handyman.
― put a VONC on it (suzy), Thursday, 6 October 2022 16:56 (one year ago) link
A reminder that the Daily Mail was about to do a hit job on the Lawrences then Neville who had done plastering work at editor Paul Dacre’s house rang him up & said it was his son and could he help & Dacre was reminded of their humanity https://t.co/iSSrp8agAR— MARCUS. 🇧🇧🏳️🌈 (@marcusjdl) October 6, 2022
― xyzzzz__, Friday, 7 October 2022 09:21 (one year ago) link
I didn't know the Mail was about to go after the Lawrence family (not exactly surprising).
― xyzzzz__, Friday, 7 October 2022 09:23 (one year ago) link
I knew about the Dacre connection but imagined they were just ignoring the story, rather than planning a hit-piece
― politics is about vibes and the vibes are off (stevie), Friday, 7 October 2022 10:38 (one year ago) link