tipping

yeah xp

Yeah, that Park Slope guy is a dick. Since I grew up in New Zealand, where tipping is almost non-existent, I learned pretty quickly what was expected. For a few months, it felt like money I wasn't used to spending, but it doesn't take long til it's just part of living in the US. My everyday calculations are pretty simple: 20% for dinner, $1 per drink, $2-3-4 for food delivery (depending on size and some weird perceived difficulty of deliver), 15-20% or whatever I have for cabs. The rest is guesswork! 20% for a haircut, $2 for a bag at hotel, and some money (often forgotten) for maid service. Coffee, nothing.

Food is cheap in the US, and in the bigger picture...if you're out, and spending money, then tipping is part of the deal. I don't notice service too much, or bother keeping tabs on who/how served me. The next day the whole $ thing has disappeared - not to say that I don't notice or get stressed about money, but just that you roll with some costs, and resist others - and tipping is definitely a roll with it thing.

When I order my filet mignon I expect the wages of the peon carrying it to my seat to have already been included in the price!

^^why shouldn't we expect this to be the case? :P

lol i dunno, it's just not! i don't think that either the us or euro system is more valid. paulhw otm--those are like my exact day-to-day guidelines.

I just see tipping as some sort of silly and archaic system that has been grandfathered into our culture. I mean I follow it and try to tip 15-20% and be a good tipper and whatever but I still think it's silly.

I find it the most stressful when I'm left with some combination of bills that will make me look like a bad tipper, as mentioned above, also searching for a window to leave the tip so that the bartender knows it was /you/ who left the tip is stressful too

hmm...usually if you just leave the money in the spot where you were standing the bartender is going to know it was you, right?

First law when I'm made dictator is that everyone has to wait tables, full time, for one year after they graduate high school.

lol plz its not like u were cleaning fukken office buildings @ night or something.

I think the point was more to make people understand how a lack of tipping affects the waiter, not to show them that its some insanely difficult job.

true but i do think a lot of ppl who haven't worked in food service think it's easier than it is

anyway I live in a country now where tipping is not really part of the culture but the service is still the same if not better than it was in the states, and there's no more useless/awkward small talk! so take that, america.

enh im p sure that waiting tables is one of the few low-paying service industry jobs that lots of middle class ppl already relate to if only because its one of the few jobs that lots of middle class ppl have worked or know some1 whos worked. like i dont think cleaning offices is all that hard either but its probably crazy less remunerative

fwiw im cool w/tipping

searching for a window to leave the tip so that the bartender knows it was /you/ who left the tip is stressful too

― noted schloar (dyao), Sunday, February 28, 2010 9:06 PM (28 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

u are overthinking this bro

It's less about teaching people to tip or the hidden difficulties of serving than the fact that being in a service industry where your income is derived entirely from how nice and/or competent you are teaches a valuable skill set (social and economic) and as an added bonus breeds empathy for people in other service roles. I'm pretty sure that I can watch how someone reacts to a busy grocery checkout clerk (or w/e) and decide if they've ever waited tables.

I'm sure that other service jobs teach similar things, but the weight of 'if I'm an ass to these customers/screw up their night, I'm not getting paid' is pretty heavy for an 18-year old.

lol at relying on a job to teach you how to be a nice and charming person

it's a pretty good way, imho

WHERE ARE THE PARENTS, I ASK YOU

Better than the alternative of a nation of disgusting savages. Which is where we're currently at.

The parents are busy spoiling the kids and ensuring that there are no consequences for their actions. This is why we need to press-gang the little fuckers into the nearest TGI Friday's crew.

cosign that

what do you learn by waiting tables at hooters?

what do you learn by becoming a cabbie?

how to drive around big cities in traffic quickly & also u learn what lots of people lose and are annoying when drunk iirc

searching for a window to leave the tip so that the bartender knows it was /you/ who left the tip is stressful too

― noted schloar (dyao), Sunday, February 28, 2010 9:06 PM (28 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

i was going to say that this thread was like if people lived inside actual seinfeld episodes & then dyao posts this, which is a whole major subplot in the episode where george starts eating lunch every day w/ steinbrenner -- george goes to the same cazzoli place everyday & one day the cashier turns around when george puts a buck in the tip jar & george gets all nervous that the guy is gonna think he doesn't tip, so he decides to reach in & grab his dollar so he can "re-tip" and of course the guy turns around & sees george & accuses him of stealing from the tip jar & bans him from the cazzoli joint

aka yall over thinking this imo

u learn what lots of people lose and are annoying when drunk iirc

so, lots of overlap with waiting tables

like, my feeling is that if you go to a place often enough that it's pertinent that the bartender/cashier knows that you tipped they a. appreciate your constant business more than a tip & b. already know what your tipping practices are -- if it's just some random ass place then i don't think it really matters if some bartender you're never gonna see again knows if you left him one dollar

I got worried after reading that some people here tip 2 dollars on the first drink and keep on tipping in the hopes of getting a free round down the line

At busy bars I generally keep cash tips I leave within eyesight until the bartender picks it up, but that's because I'm paranoid about another patron picking it up rather than the bartender thinking I didn't tip.

^^ this too

Good god. Leave the dollar on the bar or put it in the jar. Your attitude (friendly/polite) matters way more than being seen dropping that dollar in their pocket - in the scheme of things, on a night when they'll pull down $100-250, a bartender doesn't care all that much about your individual tip.

I run a tab most places. Solves many headaches.

At the shady club I've helped out for (ugh) almost two years now, we had to chain the tip jars to the bar, people kept stealing them.

I got worried after reading that some people here tip 2 dollars on the first drink and keep on tipping in the hopes of getting a free round down the line

― noted schloar (dyao), Monday, March 1, 2010 1:05 AM (7 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

i usually tip $2 on the first drink just cuz thats how i was "taught" to tip, not cause i expect a free round! tho i guess i figure it cant hurt. but if the bar is so busy that the bartender really wont be able to tell that the dollar bill that you left on the bar right where you just ordered a drink is from you, then its too busy for a free drink

lol at relying on a job to teach you how to be a nice and charming person

haha this is sort of what happened with my brother at his first service job. him: "i've invented a MASK. i smile and act polite no matter WHAT i'm really feeling and people only see the FAKE IMAGE i produce. it's so deceptive." me: "yeah, it's called manners, great skill to develop." him: "but...it's...COMPLETELY INSINCERE!" me: "you think anyone cares how you actually feel?"

heh my brother's just turned 30 and hasn't quite grasped that the awful HYPOCRISY of it all is actually what most people consider 'growing up, dealing'

Best is when you order two $4 drinks, give the bartender a $10, and then just silently walk away while their back is turned.

>>“Do you need change?”

>>Funny you should ask, because I just gave you a $10 bill, and my latte and raspberry scone came to $5.75.

that is a little ridiculous, I don't think I have ever had a server ask that in such a situation.

I think this is just a habitual question that servers ask, not wanting to be presumptuous one way or the other. Not worth getting worked up over, IMO.

better phrase: I'll be right back with your change. This gives them the opportunity to stop you and say keep it, without being presumptuous.

No, if someone orders coffee and a scone, you give them their change. No stupid funny games. If they were going to give you a $4.25 tip, I'm sure they would do it even if you handed them change back.

Also, My everyday calculations are pretty simple: 20% for dinner, $1 per drink, $2-3-4 for food delivery (depending on size and some weird perceived difficulty of deliver), 15-20% or whatever I have for cabs.
You probably have this down better than most Americans! I am constantly having to explain to people that 15% for food is kind of a slap in the face these days.

disagree

i dont think anyone has ever actually asked if he wanted change after he bought a scone with a ten

It just occurred to me that I always tip on the total (incl tax) at restaurants...do other people just tip on the food+drink total? Normally the amounts involved mean that it doesn't make much difference either way, but...just wondering.

some of the biggest arguments I've had with my wife involve me tipping on food and drink and her tipping on the total incl tax

how much of a dollar difference does that usually make?

If you tip on the total including tax, you're more likely to err on the side of generosity. If you have great service, do it J's way and if the service is mediocre or just dinery, do it your way. This seems like a good married-folks' compromise (but may not fool J).

like $1 on 50 xp

haha i mean, id say, "why are you arguing about it if its only a dollar," but i am in a relationship, and i know the answer

the argument I get in w/ my gf is tipping on really small totals...I think there should be a minimum tip and she thinks it should always be a %

you are right fwiw

I know!