I'mma lay your LOLs on the dresser and EXCELSIOR them shits with a spiked bat!

This upwelled in me a burbling sort of feeling not unlike a chuckle:

I had to euthanize my wife because of the increased costs of Obamacare. I own a business that would likely have seen a huge increase in insurance costs. These costs would have had to be passed on to the customer. What customer is going to pay 3 cents more for a product? Someone that values the health and well being of a fellow citizen? Yeah right. So I put my wife down. With the savings from that, I will likely be able to keep prices down. If not, I might sell my Porsche.

― Mordy, Wednesday, January 9, 2013

http://gawker.com/5974396/the-biggest-schmuck-on-earth-left-this-as-a-tip?post=55972102

^^^this guy is consistently the funniest voice on Gawker, along with Caity Weaver

nah, that guy sux

wkiw tho

How does he feel about corporal keef i wanna know

wtf is fucken?

― pplains, Thursday, January 10, 2013 8:34 AM (57 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

it's a fuck inside of a chicken

― Solange Knowles is my hero (DJP), Thursday, January 10, 2013 8:37 AM (54 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

this 'fart' shit is beneath you guys

― rap steve gadd (D-40), Thursday, January 10, 2013 10:41 AM (14 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

says D-farty

― 乒乓, Thursday, January 10, 2013 10:42 AM (13 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

sometimes I wonder in Bizarro World there's an XLI poster named PJD whose posts are all like "ok, that's enough dick jokes" and then overrated aerosmith cosigns all his posts

― too many encores (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Thursday, January 10, 2013 8:27 AM (41 seconds ago)

LOL

^^^

like that Star Trek episode...

.. where Den collects particular posts to add onto the collection of entries that really make you think...

is that aero post a parody of a funny joke or someting?

COMEDY LAWYERING COMMENCES...NOW

(quick someone find Lex)

omfg we had Rax here. Went all the time as a kid. Your description is accurate p much.

I have bad memories of the place cuz one day I opened my kid's meal box and there was no cookie inside so my mom nudged me on and i went up to the counter all by myself to tell the lady i didn't get a cookie and she looked back at me with emotionless eyes and said 'you don't get a cookie with that' and my eyes welled up w/ tears and at that moment i became a man

― NINO CARTER, Thursday, January 10, 2013 11:58 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

"Love Sosa" has dropped from its peak of #31 on the hip-hop/R&B airplay chart two weeks in a row now, think it may have lost its momentum

― captain keefaroo (some dude), Thursday, January 10, 2013 2:11 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

also dropped on hot 100 and digital charts

― captain keefaroo (some dude), Thursday, January 10, 2013 2:12 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

u jackin?

― lol cassidy fan club (Whiney G. Weingarten), Thursday, January 10, 2013 2:14 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Film is famously collaborative. You can be a director and not have final cut, for example. Or it can be like Bertolucci's final cut of 'The Last Emperor' and be worse than the studio release. Editing is an immensely important part of cinema but relatively cheap compared to actually shooting. I'm just saying when there are that many red lights and you can not only talk to Soderbergh but he offers you three days of editing, I'd just be curious to see what he came up with and if any of it worked for me, I'd be all, "Sweet! Thanks, Steve!"

― Canaille help you (Michael White), Thursday, January 10, 2013 2:11 PM (7 hours ago)

i feel like your premise requires that a guy who was working with Scorsese when Soderbergh was in short pants to be all STEPHEN SODERBERGH with stars in his eyes

― trey songza (some dude), Thursday, January 10, 2013 2:14 PM (7 hours ago)

"gee, thanks, steve!" vs "i was having awful sex with natassija kinski on the set of cat people when you were cutting together Yes concerts you fuckwad"

― da croupier, Thursday, January 10, 2013 2:17 PM (7 hours ago)

<3

we all just agree that like Kendrick is Jimmy Page and Keef is Johnny Ramone and those are both perfectly fine aesthetics until deej runs up in here on some "NO KEEF IS SECRETLY JAMES BLOOD ULMER GUYS" and then we make fart jokes

― lol cassidy fan club (Whiney G. Weingarten), Friday, January 11, 2013 4:28 PM (17 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Starting to feel like I opened a vortex to Planet Fuck You with this thread.

― Ned Raggett, Friday, January 11, 2013 5:17 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

yes

it's on yr head, raggett

head raggett

what thread?

literary clusterfuck

*reads about vortex to Planet Fuck You*
*immediately wants to know where he can find it*

"I like it when I see white ppl at asian supermarkets, I'm always so intrigued like what exactly are you gonna buy"

once saw what looked to be our middle-school teacher at an asian market? what could she be doing there? three days later we had squid dissections.

― Philip Nunez, Saturday, January 12, 2013 5:12 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

haha

swa just the last line of that and momentarily interpreted it as a Society is in the gutter entry.

ha, otm. something about the rhythms

Re: Richard Marx

--

liked that article, especially how it subdivided his ballads into pre-prom, prom, and post-prom.

― Josh in Chicago, Sunday, January 13, 2013 11:13 AM (49 minutes ago)

Where does that leave Children Of The Night

― 'Separate Lives', by Phil Collins & Marilyn Manson (PaulTMA), Sunday, January 13, 2013 11:15 AM (48 minutes ago)

9 months post-prom

― mark e, Sunday, January 13, 2013 12:01 PM (2 minutes ago)

awes.

ya

Rubin produced the third Slipknot album, and their singer, Corey Taylor, said this about that in 2011:

"There are some people who would love for me to toe the party line, which is basically, 'Working with Rick Rubin was a very enriching experience.' Let me give you the fucking truth of it: Rick Rubin showed up for 45 minutes a week. Rick Rubin would then, during that 45 minutes, lay on a couch and have a mic brought in next to his face so he wouldn't have to move...The Rick Rubin of today is a thin, thin, thin shadow of the Rick Rubin that he was. He is overrated, he is overpaid, and I will never work with him again as long as I fucking live."

― 誤訳侮辱, Sunday, January 13, 2013 3:41 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

you lazy for this one rick

― tylerw, Sunday, January 13, 2013 3:51 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hahahaha

lol

bravo

will remember "9 months post-prom" for as long as i live tho

the last time i had weed in my house the smell was so strong i had to put it in a tupperware containter and then put that tupperware container in another tupperwear container.

― let's go do some crimes (strongo hulkington's ghost dad), Sunday, 13 January 2013 21:30 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

thankfully i didn't go down some meta what-if-we're-all-just-tupperware-containers-inside-tupperware-containers when i finally smoked it

― let's go do some crimes (strongo hulkington's ghost dad), Sunday, 13 January 2013 21:31 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

77

thats a lot of tupperware containers

Moral of the story: don't wee in your house.

Eric, you're hired as my ghost writer.

― the little prince of inane false binary hype (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Monday, January 14, 2013 7:04 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

You pay me in ghosts.

― Zero Dark 33⅓: The Final Insult (Eric H.), Monday, January 14, 2013 7:07 AM Bookmark

did anyone else find it weird foster never used the word "gay" or "lesbian"? might have helped.

― Heterocyclic ring ring (LocalGarda), Monday, January 14, 2013 8:43 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Lesbians dislike labels, gay men insist upon them.

― Zero Dark 33⅓: The Final Insult (Eric H.), Monday, January 14, 2013 8:45 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

didn't know that...

― Heterocyclic ring ring (LocalGarda), Monday, January 14, 2013 8:49 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I didn't either. I ended up with a lot of extra, unused labels.

― Zero Dark 33⅓: The Final Insult (Eric H.), Monday, January 14, 2013 8:51 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

choose somebody you're likely to get along with in general ... as similar to background and personality as possible so you're on the same page. unfortunately my landlord chose my latest roommate, he's some college-age kid with a hoodrat thing going on. he struts around the apartment saying things like "i gotta make some bread, yo!" and it'd pretty comical if i didn't have to see him everyday. good inspiration for getting my own place at least.

― Spectrum, Monday, January 14, 2013 10:46 AM (6 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

you should get him a breadmaker

― DJP, Monday, January 14, 2013 10:48 AM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

otm

Oh god I had the worst time on Tower of Terror. It was my own fault. TOTALLY my own fault. I hate that falling sensation more than anything. But I looked at the tower and I was like, eh it's not THAT tall and maybe this will be a good way to overcome my fear since I love the Twilight Zone and was really into the theme of the ride. WRONG. Oh god it was horrible, the way they made you fall over and over and over again...I screamed the whole time, like crying. Then I sat on a park bench afterwards catatonic like "bubububububbubu" Goldie Hawn in Overboard for like an hour. Again, totally my own fault. I should have stayed away.

but everyone else I know loves it so yes, highly recommended lol

― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, January 14, 2013 12:21 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I'm glad my trauma gives you so much enjoyment

:)

how does yr landlord choose yr roommate? that sounds fucking awful.