Album Covers that beg the Question: What the Hell were You THINKING?

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http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B0000075YL.01.LZZZZZZZ.gif

Here, Kansas lead singer and....apparently....gun nut Steve Walsh displays both his love for firearms and jogging shorts. What the FUCK?

Others?

Alex in NYC (vassifer), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 22:26 (twenty years ago) link

What's he doing over on the left, in the kneepads?

Sam J. (samjeff), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 22:32 (twenty years ago) link

http://image.allmusic.com/00/amg/cov200/drf700/f729/f72912hxdrb.jpg

(though I suppose the band pretty much explains the cover)

Curt1s St3ph3ns, Wednesday, 28 May 2003 22:35 (twenty years ago) link

What's he doing over on the left, in the kneepads?

Not sure. Either he's doing some gymnastics or -- worryingly -- he's assuming "the ready position," if ya smell what I'm cookin'.

Alex in NYC (vassifer), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 22:39 (twenty years ago) link

http://www.antenna.nl/~dinyar/td/248ha47a.jpg

Very determinedly untwee -- which may have been the whole point.

Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 22:42 (twenty years ago) link

Plush. great album, but the sleeve is pretty darn stupid, if a little charming.

http://image.allmusic.com/00/amg/cov200/drd300/d313/d3136073ju6.jpg

electric sound of jim (electricsound), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 22:44 (twenty years ago) link

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B000002KFJ.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

I mistakenly posted this cover first on the "coolest band ever" thread....and while that argument could indeed be made, I'm quite sure Bill Ward's disquietingly form-fitting tights and Ozzy's Kimono/platform soles ensemble render them disqualified for placement.

Alex in NYC (vassifer), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 22:44 (twenty years ago) link

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00000AF94.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

The never shoulda taken it off.

Alex in NYC (vassifer), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 22:48 (twenty years ago) link

And another from our boys.....

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B000001ELN.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

A nicely designed cover to be sure, but there's a fatal flaw. Not sure if you can make it out, but the final panel displays the dogged photographer/critic boldly declaring "I STILL SAY THEY STINK!"

Why arm your detractors so?

Alex in NYC (vassifer), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 22:50 (twenty years ago) link

That second Steve Walsh cover looks like something from Francis Bacon's Southwestern phase.

David Beckhouse (David Beckhouse), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 22:52 (twenty years ago) link

and the first one looks like those paintings in the royal tenenbaums.

jones (actual), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 22:57 (twenty years ago) link

Steve Walsh is a creepy dude.

Alex in NYC (vassifer), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 22:57 (twenty years ago) link

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B000001F9T.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

What exactly gave dear Julian the notion that this was a good idea?

Alex in NYC (vassifer), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 22:59 (twenty years ago) link

COME BACK STEVE WALSH, ALL IS FORGIVEN!

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00002R0SE.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

Alex in NYC (vassifer), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 23:00 (twenty years ago) link

the most shocking thing about this excessive display of band unity is that Rush didn't think of it first.

http://image.allmusic.com/00/amg/cov200/drf500/f588/f58892dwslv.jpg

Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 23:01 (twenty years ago) link

Just in case you didn't think the indian/cop/leather guy/cowboy outfits were silly enough....

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00000HXFB.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

Alex in NYC (vassifer), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 23:03 (twenty years ago) link

"maybe they'll buy our collection of Highlander-oriented material if we put overmuscular blue cartoons of us wearing suits without shirts on the cover. You know those sci-fi fans."

http://image.allmusic.com/00/amg/cov200/drc800/c861/c86178e05u1.jpg

Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 23:07 (twenty years ago) link

first off, there's no number on the thing, TOTALLY confusing the diehard Chicago fan. Not to mention something funny is going on in the back there.

http://image.allmusic.com/00/amg/cov200/drc500/c546/c54681g83y7.jpg

Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 23:11 (twenty years ago) link

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00005YWRD.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg


Which target demographic was in mind when this masterpiece was dreamed up?

Alex in NYC (vassifer), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 23:11 (twenty years ago) link

Alex, the funny thing about the Village People 'Renaissance' cover is that they're all going 'Wow, look what happened to you, how fabulous!' - and yet, it isn't fabulous at all.

colin s barrow (colin s barrow), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 23:18 (twenty years ago) link

Those Bill Ward pajamas always cracked me up.

I always thought this cover was so aesthetically unpleasing:
http://image.allmusic.com/00/amg/cov200/drf500/f532/f53299uy58r.jpg

because it says "Def Leppard" twice; once on the left in the form of a logo and again on the right in a conventional font. Like "duh, our fans might be too stupid to read the logo so we better print it again."

Mr. Diamond (diamond), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 23:20 (twenty years ago) link

Chris De Burgh Album Covers S/D

weasel diesel (K1l14n), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 23:20 (twenty years ago) link

Maybe Steve Walsh is doing some Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.

David Beckhouse (David Beckhouse), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 23:45 (twenty years ago) link

Still mystified by this one...

http://image.allmusic.com/00/amg/cov200/drf100/f182/f182747607k.jpg

Chris Barrus (Chris Barrus), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 23:58 (twenty years ago) link

Walsh used to perform LIVE in those jogging shorts (cf. Kansas video for "People of the South Wind")

Joe (Joe), Thursday, 29 May 2003 00:53 (twenty years ago) link

Alex, I _love_ that Julian Cope cover! Surely I am not alone...?

colin s barrow (colin s barrow), Thursday, 29 May 2003 01:38 (twenty years ago) link

Actually, I love it too....but you must admit, it's pretty fucked up. I know, I know, that's the idea, but it wasn't exactly an open invitation to the uninitiated to come check him out. It's still better than that Kevin Rowland cover, tho'.

Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:20 (twenty years ago) link

I love the Kate Bush cover. And I swear I've seen a different (just as bad) version of the Village People one where the background is pink, and the poses are different. And I think that, especially in its shiny foil-paper original, the Hall and Oates one is kinda cool in a glam, pop-arty way.

Sean (Sean), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:24 (twenty years ago) link

Sean, have you seen the cover to "The Kick Inside"? She appears to be farting little demons from under her dress. And the back cover is even crazier - she's flying through the air looking like a bat.

colin s barrow (colin s barrow), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:25 (twenty years ago) link

Ooops, I mean "Never Forever". By Kate Bush, of course.

colin s barrow (colin s barrow), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:31 (twenty years ago) link

The alternate Renaissance cover:

http://franklarosa.com/ThumbnailServlet?image=/vinyl/BigImg/vp.jpg&width=350&smooth=1

Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:35 (twenty years ago) link

the Who one is kind of "kids these days...!" innit?

Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:51 (twenty years ago) link

http://www.pure.cc/~hine/rock-2/scorpions-drive.jpg

Roman (Roman), Thursday, 29 May 2003 02:59 (twenty years ago) link

http://www.yk.rim.or.jp/~kerokero/pict/nomi-v1.gif

Roman (Roman), Thursday, 29 May 2003 03:01 (twenty years ago) link

My God.

colin s barrow (colin s barrow), Thursday, 29 May 2003 03:20 (twenty years ago) link

Alex, I _love_ that Julian Cope cover! Surely I am not alone...?

some editions of the vinyl release came with a 24" x 36" poster of it! also one of the videos from that album has him crawling around a bit in his fabulous turtle guise... i think "me singing" or "laughing boy."

fortunate hazel (f. hazel), Thursday, 29 May 2003 04:19 (twenty years ago) link

that cover is before.

this one is after:

http://image.allmusic.com/00/amg/cov200/dre700/e772/e77290tlfau.jpg

electric sound of jim (electricsound), Thursday, 29 May 2003 04:41 (twenty years ago) link

Sweet fancy moses.

Kenan Hebert (kenan), Thursday, 29 May 2003 04:45 (twenty years ago) link

Picture of runny shit = thread killer. Who knew?

Kenan Hebert (kenan), Thursday, 29 May 2003 05:20 (twenty years ago) link

not Millie, apparently

electric sound of jim (electricsound), Thursday, 29 May 2003 05:22 (twenty years ago) link

Yeah, that Royal Trux cover really does take the fuckin' cake. Kudos to JBR for digging out the original Rennaissance. I distinctly remember stumbling across that album when it came out and thinking aloud: "What in fuckin' blazes?!?!?!"

Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 29 May 2003 09:10 (twenty years ago) link

Roy Harper owns this thread:

Alex K (Alex K), Thursday, 29 May 2003 10:12 (twenty years ago) link

Each and every one of the breathtakingly hideous Dean prog rock portraits - Yes and the like.

Also, every single one of the Cranberries album covers are just appalling.

Love Kate Bush as I do, most of her album covers are pretty ropey, too, especially the big-hair-horror that is The Dreaming.

russ t, Thursday, 29 May 2003 10:19 (twenty years ago) link

I have a blown up photocopy of this on my desk... 11 x 8.5 really does it better justice, but still worth posting:

http://image.allmusic.com/00/amg/cov200/drf300/f368/f36801ig9ta.jpg

Aaron W (Aaron W), Thursday, 29 May 2003 12:12 (twenty years ago) link


Did they want to make people ashamed to buy the album??!

King Kobra (King Kobra), Thursday, 29 May 2003 14:01 (twenty years ago) link

http://www.cdshakedown.com/1994_pictures/primalscream.jpg
Oops, I was referring to this CD. I don't think I have the fucking nerve to take this confederate flag up to the check-out counter.

King Kobra (King Kobra), Thursday, 29 May 2003 14:04 (twenty years ago) link

Are there any album covers featuring shirtless men that don't seem bizarre now?

To answer myself: Raw Power. But yeah, like Isaac Hayes, Ig is free of the man-pelt.

bendy, Saturday, 4 October 2008 11:37 (fifteen years ago) link

http://static.rateyourmusic.com/album_images/o138979.jpg

Myonga Vön Bontee, Monday, 6 October 2008 04:59 (fifteen years ago) link

(OK, so it's not particularly "WTF?" - it just made me smile, and I wanted to share it.)

Myonga Vön Bontee, Monday, 6 October 2008 05:02 (fifteen years ago) link

What's so weird about the "Controversy" cover?

Tuomas, Monday, 6 October 2008 06:41 (fifteen years ago) link

Why Roger Daltrey, why?

http://static.rateyourmusic.com/album_images/89864.jpg

Ride a Rock Horse?

Nate Carson, Monday, 6 October 2008 08:30 (fifteen years ago) link

seven months pass...

http://i43.tinypic.com/2pyupoo.jpg

abanana, Thursday, 21 May 2009 20:55 (fourteen years ago) link

and your argument is invalid, too

abanana, Thursday, 21 May 2009 20:57 (fourteen years ago) link

xpost looks like James Franco

DJ Mr. Face Stabba, M.D. (Whitey on the Moon), Thursday, 21 May 2009 21:19 (fourteen years ago) link

good god it does too

she started dancing to that (Finefinemusic), Thursday, 21 May 2009 21:30 (fourteen years ago) link

Has everyone here discovered the LPCover Lover blog? Another 5 threads could be filled from there, though most are too obscure for the canon.

Derelict, Friday, 22 May 2009 14:36 (fourteen years ago) link

this is always my go-to choice for these threads:

http://www.oldtimejazz4u.de/Webimg/AHVA197505.jpg

henry s, Friday, 22 May 2009 16:31 (fourteen years ago) link

That's not really too far off from Let it Bleed, which so freaked me out as a kid I didn't want to buy it, even though I really wanted "Gimme Shelter". A lot of Stones covers are WTF objectively, but softened by familiarity.

bendy, Friday, 22 May 2009 16:47 (fourteen years ago) link

lol at that Neil Diamond cover. It's like he's making love to the air or something.

"some dumb fucking indie reason that you refuse to admit" (Bimble), Friday, 22 May 2009 19:41 (fourteen years ago) link

imaginary phantom self donging

your porno name is rodd tundgren (M@tt He1ges0n), Friday, 22 May 2009 20:13 (fourteen years ago) link

Phantom mammoth dong syndrome.

staggerlee, Saturday, 23 May 2009 00:38 (fourteen years ago) link

three weeks pass...
two years pass...

http://991.com/NewGallery/Flora-Purim-Everyday-Everynig-524694.jpg
"Ooh, Freddie's here"

happiness is the new productivity (Hurting 2), Tuesday, 14 February 2012 19:26 (twelve years ago) link

one month passes...

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7jGF8pFTQH8/Sw-5HnUp1FI/AAAAAAAAC6k/Oj8H21fBLVU/s1600/Front-1.jpg

Has there ever been an album cover that managed to do a visual pun on the album name without looking goofy?

Tuomas, Monday, 26 March 2012 13:52 (twelve years ago) link

two years pass...

^^^ that's a good one, because not only is the cover not good technically, I also can't even figure out what the intent was.

A Perfect Ratio of Choogle to Jam (Dan Peterson), Monday, 31 March 2014 20:22 (ten years ago) link

xp guessing that's nora in front of her casa.

sleepingsignal, Monday, 31 March 2014 20:47 (ten years ago) link

it looks dark in there

james franco tur(oll)ing test (Hurting 2), Monday, 31 March 2014 20:48 (ten years ago) link

I think it's one of the most awkward record covers I have ever seen, on many different levels

james franco tur(oll)ing test (Hurting 2), Monday, 31 March 2014 20:48 (ten years ago) link

The first song here “Changüí en la Casa de Nora” is how the changüí was traditionally played before Elio Revé, Sr. migrated to Havana in 1955. Nora was born in the same place as Revé, Sr. and maintains her home there where the jam sessions still take place. After hours of musicians playing and the country dance probably going all night until close to dawn, she is known to serve up her famous soup and seafood. The chorus, always sung rapidly in childish voices, says “Let’s go to Nora’s house to eat ajiaco”.

sleepingsignal, Monday, 31 March 2014 20:57 (ten years ago) link

That Van Der Graaf Generator cover looks like the artist got confused about the American and British meanings of "fanny."

Ned Zeppelin (Leee), Monday, 31 March 2014 22:30 (ten years ago) link

five months pass...

Uncomfortably rapey, Eric Carmen. Gross.

http://i.imgur.com/5SY7Q2g.jpg

Johnny Fever, Wednesday, 17 September 2014 18:38 (nine years ago) link

yikes

Οὖτις, Wednesday, 17 September 2014 18:43 (nine years ago) link

http://cdn2.pitchfork.com/news/49692/1acfde93.jpg

thought this would be here for sure.

akm, Wednesday, 17 September 2014 21:05 (nine years ago) link

"yes a mosquito is nose raping a baby why not listen to our not very good new album"

akm, Wednesday, 17 September 2014 21:06 (nine years ago) link

alex in nyc was very proto-buzzfeed listicle in his old picture threads

slam dunk, Thursday, 18 September 2014 23:10 (nine years ago) link

I like the original Steve Walsh cover! It's got this weird '80s kitsch that that hits me right in the childish sweet spot.

Hakeem Olajuwon Howard (Leee), Thursday, 18 September 2014 23:17 (nine years ago) link

four years pass...

https://i.imgur.com/XTUkrNI.jpg

lispectah deck (unregistered), Tuesday, 26 February 2019 17:17 (five years ago) link

man, reading the first posts in the thread is a trip. i could tell at a glance that styx album cover was a storm thorgerson joint. also fuck you i like the cover to "more you becomes you".

since we're reviving this i would like to note that while the new sunwatchers album "illegal moves" is great, the cover art is, er, not.

the scientology of mountains (rushomancy), Wednesday, 27 February 2019 01:05 (five years ago) link

wow omg @ sunwatchers ...

budo jeru, Wednesday, 27 February 2019 01:31 (five years ago) link

three weeks pass...

Straight nightmare fuel

enochroot, Friday, 22 March 2019 00:39 (five years ago) link

one year passes...

https://direct.rhapsody.com/imageserver/images/alb.214187/500x500.jpg

Can't tell if this is supposed to be kinda sweet or offensive?

Tuomas, Friday, 15 January 2021 23:30 (three years ago) link

eleven months pass...

thought this revive was about this

album cover // pre-save : https://t.co/MDAeut3QY4 pic.twitter.com/96PbZGJA83

— The Weeknd (@theweeknd) January 4, 2022

nashwan, Tuesday, 4 January 2022 14:26 (two years ago) link

one year passes...

michael urbaniak - ecstasy (1978)

https://imgur.com/a/wOLtZDU

idgi

my beard exists more than i do. (Austin), Saturday, 13 May 2023 16:06 (eleven months ago) link

ps- fuck you imgur. nothing you do makes sense and your "share"/"copy url" button has officially lost the plot. thanks for the absolute betrayal.

my beard exists more than i do. (Austin), Saturday, 13 May 2023 16:10 (eleven months ago) link

Alex in NYC must have used a rock-solid image host back in 2003… all his pics at the top of the thread still load.

Did you know that there’s a tunnel under Wayne Manor (morrisp), Saturday, 13 May 2023 16:14 (eleven months ago) link

Amazon links seem to last forever

brimstead, Saturday, 13 May 2023 16:15 (eleven months ago) link

yeah, that's 20 years going strong! impressive💪🏻

anyway, back the regular program: can anyone explain this one to me? like is it implying that our friend mike will pleasure the ladies as he bows his instrument? ARE THE STRINGS THE CLITORIS IN THIS ANALOGY? jfc or is it saying his playing is seductive? i've often joked that i would "lay down and spread my legs for a vibraphone solo" but IT WAS JUST A JOKE I'M SORRY.

anyway, obviously a masterwork of a cover. i don't even want to listen to the album. there's no way it can live up to the artwork.

my beard exists more than i do. (Austin), Saturday, 13 May 2023 16:25 (eleven months ago) link

The font used for his name reminds me of this:

https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/61azmcuN4mL._AC_UF894,1000_QL80_.jpg

Did you know that there’s a tunnel under Wayne Manor (morrisp), Saturday, 13 May 2023 16:46 (eleven months ago) link


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