Worst Band Names

Circle of Dead Children http://members.tripod.com/~circlegrind/ The google description Aural decimating grindcore possessing the perfect combination of extreme sickening brutality and emotion !

(sad isn't it)

Pig Destroyer

Anal Cunt

Festival of Dead Dear

.. there are hundreds of more, in grindcore/death metal.

moist

ladytron

yes

city-based names: boston, chicago, etc

ratt

Oh yes, Ned Raggetts Atomic Dustbin - f*ck*ng appalling name.

Anyway, band names. The thing about band names is that so many of them have been worn down by endless usage and we forget how awful they are. eg.

The Beatles (apalling and irrelevant insectoid pun) The Beach Boys (to quote Tanya: "they are boys! they go to the beach!") Oasis (sounds like Alan Partridge's backing band)

Something I was thinking the other day - what was the first 'abstract' band name? Not a 'the [noun]s' name or something purely descriptive. Love was fairly early. Ditto Pink Floyd.

Def Leppard Motley Crue

And others are so uninspiring to hear, they have no imagination:

Girlschool Loudness Air Supply

Please give me a break from this jackassery!!!

a moon beneath the grindsludge.

And Ladytron is a shockingly good name for the band (and it is an excellent song by Roxy Music...erm...wrong thread).

the worst of all is Soul Coughing

What's wrong with Ladytron?

Nothing of course...excellent band.

But I remembered another very bad band name (since were into the question of 80s revivalism): Johnny Hates Jazz.

saidflorence - insisted on awful name being spelt lower case.

Fretblanket - no comment needed really.

YES. I should think that Killing Jesus would be worse than Killing Joke. THERFORE, Killing Jesus is a worse band name than Killing Joke. Yes.

Yes, Virginia. There is a worse band name than Killing Joke.

Jester 86 Understands Something.....

Jester Eighty Six LOVES JESUS!

PEACE.

PS.....Cheese is Rice.

Yours In THEE LOVE of JESUS CHRIST,

CAL,

or in other words...

j86.

Apart from Taunton, of course. But then they didn't really exist ...

Grand Prize Winner for this category goes to . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Papa Roach. The name is about as bad as the music.

Deep Blue Something (in the Sixpence None The Richer bracket)

Limp Biskit

(grim, but quite apt I suppose) Muse (hateful. conclusive proof that you can judge a book by its cover, unless it's by Gorky's Zygotic Mynci and it's err.. not a book

Echoboy (yeah - cause that'll really make your band stand out)

The Style Council (was this self parody?)

Stereophonics (90s band name by numbers)

Dub Federation (might have been OK if there wasn't already a Dub Syndicate. at least ADF added an 'Asian' bit for interest)

Almost all those one-word names chosen by every shitpop chancer in mid 90s Britain.

Also, any 90's band name with "Super" in it.

Radiohead.

Coldplay.

The Cranberry Saw Us.

a) It's a Monty Python ref.

b) They represent the West Side. Goleta Power.

LOVE and TOMORROW are contenders.

but maybe THEM predates?

(non-rock answer - tho of course they played rock support slots at the key moment - wd be AMM: explanation of which acronym I notice Keith Rowe is still keeping shtumm abt, in current Wire)

Also "Northern Uproar" did suggest boring meat 'n' 2 veg britrock of the most ZZZzzz-inducing sort. Fortunately.

x0x0

By far, Car Seat Headrest is the worst one mentioned so far.

Beatles is a pretty naff functional name, pun on an earlier archetypal group name. But it got valorised into something by usage and the group being somewhat phenomenal.
The Smiths, artisanal songcraft?
THe Cure arrogant statement on their place in the world, Cure for their non existence? Can't remember where the original 2 word version of that came from Easy Cure .... is it a song or some other reference.

some DJ is calling themselves jichael mackson
FFS

I dislike when a band is called something super basic, like "Cake" or "Live," but they have a convoluted explanation that "It doesn't mean what you think..."

There's a narrow range between basic (The Music, the Band, Television, Can, The The...) and too cute like Ululating Mummies, Pamplamoose, Squirrel Nut Zippers

I kinda wish modern bands would go for more ridiculous names like Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark, but I guess if everyone is an Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark, then no one is an Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark

I listen to a genre where there are a glut of bands that seem to be the founders looking for an obscure pretentious verb and a disgusting obscure medical condition and awkwardly sew them together. so my standards are low.

just no spoonerisms

Hey, Adjective Noun is one of my favorite bands.

Surely you're familiar with their albums Promising Debut and Disappointing Followup.

obscure pretentious verb and a disgusting obscure medical condition

Ah yes, who can forget...

Flagellating Chlamydia

Defenestrated Buboes

Spatchcock and the Goiters

The Collating Hemorrhoids

Televangelize Pimple

I hated both the named Wet Leg and Dry Cleaning, and then was all bummed out when I liked each band's music.

Coming to your town together on the Wet & Dry Tour.

Bahaha

Cal Rifkin

She's... back?!!

https://i.imgur.com/5oDect6.jpg

...Oh.

https://i.imgur.com/THxAfOX.png

Could mean the Whitney museum on tour too..

Oh, I wanna sit awkwardly on a bed with somebody

I wanna wear a shirt with somebody

“@“

https://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/at-mind-palace-music/

Not sure if it’s because their music is generally terrible but I hate the name “Imagine Dragons”

Yeah me too. It's one of those superficially clever band names because one can read it in the imperative: "imagine (that there are) dragons." Or one can read implied punctuation such as "imagine... dragons!" as in sheesh, what the fuck are dragons doing here?

Ditto "Cage the Elephant," which has an imperative reading: "cause that elephant to be caged," as well as the slightly twee notion that there is an elephant named Cage, hence an implied comma: "Cage, the elephant, wishes to be fed more peanuts."

Lots of band names can just die in fire. Maybe bands should all just be issued a number like the Social Security system.

I am guilty too; during an especially weird part of the twentieth century I was in an experimental jazz band that spelled its name differently for every show. I vaguely wish I had kept some of the posters. Curds and Whey, Kurds n Way, Curds + Weigh, Kurds & Whey, etc.

Oh, I wanna sit awkwardly on a bed with somebody

I wanna wear a shirt with somebody

Underrated post

It's one of those superficially clever band names because one can read it in the imperative: "imagine (that there are) dragons." Or one can read implied punctuation such as "imagine... dragons!" as in sheesh, what the fuck are dragons doing here?

Ditto "Cage the Elephant," which has an imperative reading: "cause that elephant to be caged," as well as the slightly twee notion that there is an elephant named Cage, hence an implied comma: "Cage, the elephant, wishes to be fed more peanuts."

🤯 tbh

Hed PE

Is it a Public Enemy reference?

i always thought it was an abbreviation for "planet earth"

hey i was kinda right

Hed PE (also known as (hed) Planet Earth and stylized as (həd) p.e. or as (Hed)pe[12] or (Hed)PE[13]) or (həd) Planetary Evolution, is an American rock band from Huntington Beach, California.

also lol @ all those different variations and me still sitting here going, "so is it like, head pee or HEAD PEE EE?"

Their / They're / There

oh jeez

Makes sense considering the three members were previously in such bands as Cap'n Jazz, Into It. Over It., and Loose Lips Sink Ships.

might as well name their next one Well, Akshually

Pretty good song titles

There's a local shit deathcore band called Catcher And the Rye

I am fairly sure they're just idiots that think that is the title of the book. They are humongous douchebags

probably for a different thread, but cant find one suitable, what's the most obvious band name that hasn't been "taken" yet? Taken by a somewhat notable band who would stop someone else using it I mean.

I have been thinking about this. Animal names are popular - Eagles, scorpions, Owls, Wolves, Coyotes, Worms, Otters, Bonobos, Giraffes, Zebra, Naked Mole Rats, Wallabies, Sloths, Tardigrades, Yellowjackets, Fruit Bats, Bandicoots? Apparently all taken.

But there are some still sitting out there unclaimed. I am not aware of a band called the Ring-Tailed Lemurs, or the Earwigs.

The sneakiest move would be to call your next band The Beetles. Technically it hasn't been taken.

Earwig has already been used - early 90s shoegazer band who later turned into Insides

I once read that the most common band names in America are Paradox; The Rain; and some third one I forgot. Googling confirms that Paradox is a top 10 name, as are Apollo, Atlas, and Zero.

These are fun things to check out on last.fm, for example

https://www.last.fm/music/Paradox

The 1960s was a huge landgrab for common words. You just had to plant a “The” flag in front of it.

xxxpost, I check every once in a while, but there's never been a hardcore band called Lifetime of Abuse

there is Life is Abuse but I don't like the ring of that as well

I was pretty upset to discover Moni Jitchell recently - I thought we'd agreed to stop doing this shit

Buckcherry should have been the last word in that nonsense

pro-tip - if you used to be in the band Saliva and you want to go on tour and do their songs, but Saliva still exists and you can't legally use their name, perhaps best not to use the naming convention "Josey Scott's Saliva"

lol

i had a really good "worst band name" idea last night, but forgot it! it was 2 words and one of the words was 'Pizza'

Sounds like band-name trauma induced by this:

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/F1F4B-7agAEotGg?format=jpg&name=large

Pizza Great Guy

The "ILM Best of 2023 Tracks Nominations" playlist just served me up a song by needanamebro.

they got a new name now bro

https://www.instagram.com/saynow

they're great but I'm glad they changed it that name wasn't doing them any favours

ruby the hatchet

...I had avoided "Amp Fiddler" until a couple weeks ago due to the truly dire choice of name, but turns out he's great!