my intergluteal cleft is bleeding: fistulas, hemorrhoids, other butt stuff

it did actually feel like somebody had kicked me in the ass! like, that kind of pain, not sharp.

jeez you guys!

great to hear it went smoothly sleeve.

joan crawf please give us an update on your ass when you get a chance.

kate i do want to know about "boofing" please spill.

"so anyway i started getting fucked up the ass and i'm more or less better now" new board description obv

so yeah, thanks Tracer -- and congrats sleeve! update is, there was so much wrong w/my keister, I did a 4 hour train ride on the heels of a plane ride, and the seat on the train sucked I could tell the second I sat down it was gonna be trouble but I didn't know it was the level-up seat, and I guess alll this was the perfect storm to aggravate already-present internal problems and complicate them with giant weeping welts on my inner cheeks, for lack of a less poetic way of putting it. my condition got super bad on day 2 of a 6 day out-of-town-on-biz jaunt, and as soon as it got bad...I had to fly coast to coast early a.m. that really kicked everything into overdrive, resulting in a west coast hotel room pain peak, really incredible. I'm fortunate in that I can get a doctor to come to me if need be so I did, and got stuff that helped a little, but he's a GP and could really only help in the very emergent sense. once home, I got straight to urgent care & got antibiotics & lotions & powders & a consult number for probable surgery. doctors don't really grasp that when I say "I have to schedule all this around work because work doesn't wait and there are people depending on me," I really mean it, but I'm home long enough now that if I can get a consult booked tomorrow & then under the scalpel quick enough I might be able to pull it off and hit the road month after next in better shape. probably still using the donut pillow wherever I go either way but yeesh. feeling about 80% now with the help of the antibiotics, I'm no longer crying out in pain from the bathroom and my cowboy walk is barely noticeable.

omg my dude

I am basically fine now, stiff and sore back there but have accomplished the post-op pee and poo milestones, also only took two oxycodones on the day of surgery and then tylenol/ibuprofen which I consider a victory

so sorry to hear of yr experience, and yes when I flew east in June I immediately put my neck pillow under my butt, it saved my ass (literally)

jeez JCLC, get better soon please!

sleeve, glad you’re doing well. did you actually get a diagnosis? pilonidal cyst?

it was an anal fistula, ty for asking!

I am on lifting-weight limits for 2 weeks and then a followup

Raise Your Skinny Fistulae Like Antennas to Heaven

JCLC hoping you start to get some relief soon. nothing's worse than feeling pain during the one activity (sitting) that nobody can avoid.

just to update y'all, because the situation was both an infection & my usually "it's fucked up back there" problems, I'm feeling MUCH better -- the general inflammation that had basically expanded to the buttocks & perineum is being treated by antibiotics & responding well, and I'm trying to book surgery for the rest, although my schedule doesn't really allow me to accept extended periods of bedrest so we'll see.

support on this thread meant a fuckin lot over the past few days, btw, thanks v much to y'all!

fuck that sounds to have been miserable and good to hear its easing

glad things have improved. is there a diagnosis for this madness yet?

fissure & 'roids that I've had forever, aggravated by extended sedentary time on trains & planes, added cellulitis, that was what really mangled the whole area

ow ow ow

much empathy, JCLC. sounds punishing

to the thread topic, I swear I’d mentioned this here before, but nearly 15 years ago (!!) I had a peri-anal abscess. I notice a weird swelling that isn’t painful, go to the walk-in clinic the next day, they give me antibiotics and set up a consult for Monday

I go into the surgeon’s office. I presume he’s a lower digestive doc, but I think of him as the ass doctor. He is very curt but professional, says we need to drain it, and explains it’s probably a clogged anal gland (am I a dog? I have these things?! wtf!) and before I have time to really consider what’s going on, I’m sideways on one of those reclining medical chairs, he’s injected a numbing agent into my rear area (stabbing my area!!) and then moments later is using a scalpel. It feels like a mild tugging but he’s also pushing, and unexpectedly it’s some terrible viral content (man has how much fluid in this swollen area? let’s find out!).

it’s a bad scene. I’m mildly traumatized, and he gives me a 50/50 it heals up on its own, but I later realize this is optimistic. I go about my life, it heals over, doesn’t heal over, etc.
no blood, but it’s a “channel” and is just kind of… moist? on the surface. I only realize it’s not healed while on vacation. There’s also other life drama going on, which is tangential, but I am finally coming to terms with the fact I need to call the office while I’m on vacation

so long story short I had surgery and they made me… a bigger asshole!

sorry. it was close enough to the orifice they just lay it open and let it heal that way. everything goes fine, I make one call to the office while healing to make sure I didn’t tear out stitches (there were none) and apparently I had some minor other business in the area (healed fissure, maybe hemorrhoids) that he just cleaned up because sure, why not

I feel for people with crohns because this is ongoing nonsense to deal with. I was lucky, everything is normal, and I am only a huge asshole in the social way and not physically

"Wonder what a chair thinks about all day . . . well, here comes another asshole."

(sleeve) is a 57-year-old white male who is done well from his
posterior anal fistulotomy and hemorrhoidectomy. The seropurulent
drainage that plagued him prior to the surgery and perianal pain has
resolved completely. Physical examination today reveals complete
healing of his posterior fistulotomy wound. At this point time I will see
the patient back on a as needed basis.

that's what she said

congrats sleeve!

lol mookie,

Congrats on as needed bum!

My bum is also on an “as needed” basis currently fwiw

congrats on the good news, sleeve.

Great news!

this seems to be returning, doubt I can get a doc appt before January but I need to get another checkup

Oh no :(

I need to be taking more sitz baths, that's the thing that really seems to help, but they are somewhat time-consuming (20+ minutes)

Sorry to hear this, sleeve. Hope you can get checked out soon.

sleeve this sucks, hope it can be healed properly ASAP xx

Those medicos have to get to the bottom of this.

Ugh, ENBB made that joke eons ago.

lol it's OK, plenty more where that came from!

Sitz baths can be really annoying (esp if you have back problems too like me) but they're really important if you're experiencing inflammation. A shower can also work in a pinch if your shower allows for the right angle, though sitz baths are better IME. Hope you're able to get an appointment soon!

getting an adjustable standing desk has helped a lot for me, for both my fistula and my back

yeah I think I need to do something about my work/chair/desk situation, I love my current desk but a different chair might help

Standing desks are great.

This morning I got to observe a fistula repair, a hemorrhoidectomy, and the beginning of a bowel resection done by a robot. It was AWESOME.

Those poor patients though. The surgeon told me in the US the hemorrhoidectomy guy would have been sent home with Vicodin whereas here they only give Tylenol. The thing that gets me with surgery is how brutal and rough it is at times. Also - the patient screamed under anaesthesia. Well, yelped. Didn't expect that.

wow!!

I am still trying to heal mine up completely and taking lots of sitz baths, but it's probably time to get the doc to take another look

Yeah one of the surgeons was saying that the healing time is pretty long for a lot of these surgeries. Things I was surprised to find out - butt surgery is done in stirrups! It makes sense but I didn't know that. Also didn't know they make butt speculums but lo and behold.

lol, that is all excellent info, thx

I've been waiting for an update on this.

i've been shitting blood for like a week now. getting pretty tired of it to be honest.

the first time i started shitting blood i was very concerned and went to the hospital. they said it was normal and gave me a pamphlet telling me to stop doing so much anal. me and my then-wife laughed. why would i ever want to do something like that? i remember that mostly as an example of how ridiculously close-minded i was back then. i don't do anal now but mostly because i find it as "meh" as most other forms of sex. i did _not_ enjoy the prostate orgasm i had at _all_.

anyway the blood is bright red, so i'm not terribly worried about it. i had a big poop and i ripped my asshole open. what the hell am i supposed to do, take a popper every time i need to take a shit? that sounds like fun, and therefore i refuse to do it on principle.

it does remind me that one of the things i have on my desk is a sterile package containing a box. i'm supposed to shit in the box and mail it back to the hospital, where they'll test it for colon cancer. there are a bunch of things i'm supposed to be tested for. i'm trying to manage my multiple health conditions and be regularly evaluated for serious health conditions i _might_ wind up having while still trying to work a full-time job. it's completely possible that i might have colon cancer and that if i shat in a box and mailed it to the hospital _right now_ i might be able to be successfully treated for it. i really don't, if you'll pardon the pun, give a shit. also, like i said, i'm regularly shitting blood due to my hemorrhoids, so i doubt that they'll be able to do a successful fecal culture based on any sample i provide today.

how am i supposed to even shit in a box, anyway? the most confusing thing about having my dick cut off is when they ask me to pee in a cup. peeing in a cup was easy when i had a dick. i was actually always really bad at aiming, even compared to your typical sober man, but that was largely a matter of distance. i have zero distance vision whatsoever, which meant that i aimed about as well as a guy who was three sheets to the wind even when i was stone cold sober. on top of that there was the BPH. i was peeing sitting down for years before i came out as trans for what are, i swear to you, entirely cisgender reasons. unlike some women, i get no gender euphoria whatsoever from sitting down to pee. i do kind of wish i could still pee standing up - i always kinda liked it. because of the BPH, though, there was the dribble.

it really is a shame i'm not into anal. i have a hell of a great prostate. one of my friends got this new form of bottom surgery. she don't have a full vaginal canal, but she's got kind of a tunnel so that it's possible to hit her prostate from the front. they didn't have that when i got my surgery. i'm a little bit jealous, but only until i remember that oh yeah, i don't really enjoy prostate orgasms.

where was i? oh, peeing in a cup. i mean i could get my dick pretty close to the cup. if i remember right, you're not supposed to stick your dick actually in the cup - it could contaminate the sample. the first time i was supposed to pee in a cup it went fine, actually, it was easier than i thought it would be. the second time, though, it just baffled me. i've only had to do it twice. maybe i was just having a bad day the second time.

i was reading something about the speech patterns of "okama", which is an old-time slur used for certain types of effeminate gay bottoms in japan, roughly equivalent to the f-slur. what the thing i read said is that the speech patterns combined the more formal and reserved speech typically used by women in japan with frank and blunt discussion of topics "dignified" women would never discuss. the example given was an "okama" discussing diarrhea using more formal speech patterns typically associated with women. i find that really relatable. it speaks really strongly to my experience as a trans woman.

sorry to hear about the bleeding kate - really hope the doctors can get to the (er) bottom of it!

coincidence that this thread got bumped bc I've been having some inflammation of my surgery site and I'm back on flagyl and cipro this week

gl crut

mine has finally healed I think? don't wanna jinx it lol. but for the last couple months I have been doing this ridiculous primate squat/hand-bidet thing anytime I felt anything at all, just a quick rinse/soap/rinse over a towel, sometimes several times a day. I think it worked!

also, like i said, i'm regularly shitting blood due to my hemorrhoids, so i doubt that they'll be able to do a successful fecal culture based on any sample i provide today.

they will be able to do a successful culture with blood -- please follow through on this. colon cancer is very preventable if caught early.

they will be able to do a successful culture with blood -- please follow through on this. colon cancer is very preventable if caught early.

― J Edgar Noothgrush (Joan Crawford Loves Chachi)

good to know, i'll put the box in the restroom so i don't forget

i called the nurse advice line but they were useless, they're mandated to say "go to the er", i guess cuz there's a chance it'll bleed out into the peritoneum or something. i mean, that's not clinical advice, that's what their lawyers told them to say to avoid malpractice lawsuits. every time i ask a medical provider about anything all they say is "go to the er". this is why i don't bother talking to professionals most of the time. none of them are gonna tell me that they can do a successful culture with blood, it's just "go to the er". i spend an hour on hold and that's what i get for it. i know i sound like a boomer but i got ass bleed like a boomer so i feel like i got the right.

idk what i gotta do so that my rectum heals up, every time i poop it exacerbates things. i should probably follow some diet or another but i don't know which. apparently i should go to the ER so they can give me a handout. because that's efficient healthcare.

shitting blood for like a week now. getting pretty tired of it to be honest

New board description, pls :)

Every month or so, I’m woken up by a dull, increasing butt pain, just inside the anus, like a ball of painpoo is just increasing and increasing. Lasts for two hours and is panic-worthy levels of pain at its peak. Then it recedes, and I forget about it, and forget to mention it to my doctor. A phantom ass visitor! Wonder what it is