yeah but kudos for this too:
Wonder what his handicap will be after this
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Saturday, 28 November 2009 02:18 (fourteen years ago) link
this bit is bullshit right?
Tiger Woods' wife used a golf club to smash a window of his Cadillac Escalade and get her injured husband out of the SUV after he crashed
― I sb'ed your mum (ken c), Saturday, 28 November 2009 02:35 (fourteen years ago) link
i thought you'd be chipping in with a few puns
― nearly 50 in vagina years (onimo), Saturday, 28 November 2009 02:40 (fourteen years ago) link
Denise Higgins used a snooker cue to fend off youths attacking her husband John Higgins
― I sb'ed your mum (ken c), Saturday, 28 November 2009 02:41 (fourteen years ago) link
Coleen Rooney saved Wayne from drowning in lake with football.
― I sb'ed your mum (ken c), Saturday, 28 November 2009 02:42 (fourteen years ago) link
I'm sure there's no chance his wife was chasing him with a golf club following an argument and that he's wasn't reversing too quickly because of his fear of being clubbed.
― nearly 50 in vagina years (onimo), Saturday, 28 November 2009 02:44 (fourteen years ago) link
Wife saves Rolf-Dieter Heuer from burglars by colliding intruders with large hadrons at CERN HQ.
― I sb'ed your mum (ken c), Saturday, 28 November 2009 02:45 (fourteen years ago) link
plot to die hard 5 right there
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Saturday, 28 November 2009 02:51 (fourteen years ago) link
collide hard
― I sb'ed your mum (ken c), Saturday, 28 November 2009 02:59 (fourteen years ago) link
Live Hard or Die Hydrant </ken c>
― ailsa, Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:02 (fourteen years ago) link
fuck, I didn't even pun the right fucking title. Brandy is evil, kids.
― ailsa, Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:03 (fourteen years ago) link
I kind of like the enraged wife story that's developing
― VegemiteGrrrl, Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:08 (fourteen years ago) link
rumours of an affair, eh? the plot thickens
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:11 (fourteen years ago) link
the whole, "omg let me help my husband out of the car by SMASHING THE REAR WINDOW WITH A GOLF CLUB" just screams Desperate Housewives to me
― VegemiteGrrrl, Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:12 (fourteen years ago) link
putt his balls into one ho' too many
― I sb'ed your mum (ken c), Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:13 (fourteen years ago) link
^no need for that to be capitalizedxp
― hope this helps (Granny Dainger), Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:16 (fourteen years ago) link
lol sandtrap
― VegemiteGrrrl, Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:16 (fourteen years ago) link
wouldn't he have put in his 5-iron instead of balls? Or do I not understand how this is done.
― Super Cub, Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:17 (fourteen years ago) link
back window of an escalade, what's that? 4 iron, maybe a 3 depending on breeze?
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:17 (fourteen years ago) link
one thing I know for sure, if I had that kind of money I wouldn't be driving a fucking escalade.
― Super Cub, Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:20 (fourteen years ago) link
yeah if he had an escalade, I don't think I mind him getting hurt a lil bit
― iatee, Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:20 (fourteen years ago) link
xxxpost he must have got wood, surely
― I sb'ed your mum (ken c), Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:20 (fourteen years ago) link
gotta be honest i think i heard escalade mentioned but i'm not 100% sure
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:21 (fourteen years ago) link
i think his caddy lacks an escalade
― I sb'ed your mum (ken c), Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:22 (fourteen years ago) link
stop that
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:26 (fourteen years ago) link
caddy was genius but the pun is a bit sloppy. 6/10.
― Super Cub, Saturday, 28 November 2009 03:27 (fourteen years ago) link
Tiger Woods: Injuries Caused by Wife, Not SUV
Posted Nov 28th 2009 12:08AM by TMZ Staff
Tiger Woods did not suffer facial lacerations from a car accident. They were inflicted by his wife, Elin Nordegren -- according to a conversation Woods had Friday after the accident.
Tiger has yet to be formally interviewed by the Florida Highway Patrol -- that should happen this afternoon. But we're told Tiger had a conversation Friday -- with a non-law enforcement type -- detailing what went down before his Escalade hit a fire hydrant.
We're told he said his wife had confronted him about reports that he was seeing another woman. The argument got heated and, according to our source, she scratched his face up. We're told it was then Woods beat a hasty retreat for his SUV -- but according to our source, Woods says his wife followed behind with a golf club. As Tiger drove away, she struck the vehicle several times with the club.
Tiger WoodsWe're told Woods became "distracted," thought the vehicle was stopped, and looked to see what had happened. At that point the SUV hit the fire hydrant and then hit a tree.
We're also told Woods had said during the conversation Friday he had been taking prescription pain medication for an injury, which could explain why he seemed somewhat out of it at the scene.
Read more: http://www.tmz.com/2009/11/28/tiger-woods-elin-nordegren-fight-accident-suv-lacerations/#ixzz0Y8Qow27E
― ♪♫(●̲̲̅̅̅̅=̲̲̅̅̅̅●̲̅̅)♪♫ (Steve Shasta), Saturday, 28 November 2009 07:00 (fourteen years ago) link
Yeah, I buy all this a lot easier than I do the original story. I hardly ever even remembered Tiger was married before this story (I wonder if he had the same problem).
― Johnny Fever, Saturday, 28 November 2009 07:07 (fourteen years ago) link
O____________________________________O
xp
― we be emi robin' (k3vin k.), Saturday, 28 November 2009 07:07 (fourteen years ago) link
Yeah, I buy all this a lot easier than I do the original story. I hardly ever even remembered Tiger was married before this story (I wonder if he had the same problem).― Johnny Fever, Friday, November 27, 2009 11:07 PM (3 minutes ago)
― Johnny Fever, Friday, November 27, 2009 11:07 PM (3 minutes ago)
ayo P, you're still hetero right?
― ♪♫(●̲̲̅̅̅̅=̲̲̅̅̅̅●̲̅̅)♪♫ (Steve Shasta), Saturday, 28 November 2009 07:11 (fourteen years ago) link
?
― Johnny Fever, Saturday, 28 November 2009 07:42 (fourteen years ago) link
His wife's okay-looking, but whatevs.
― Johnny Fever, Saturday, 28 November 2009 07:43 (fourteen years ago) link
oic
― ♪♫(●̲̲̅̅̅̅=̲̲̅̅̅̅●̲̅̅)♪♫ (Steve Shasta), Saturday, 28 November 2009 07:49 (fourteen years ago) link
I just meant Tiger solo is a much greater public persona than "Tiger & wife," and the only time I ever remember he's married is when I see a picture of them together.
― Johnny Fever, Saturday, 28 November 2009 07:53 (fourteen years ago) link
Kind of like Bono. The only time you remember he's been married for 20+ years is when he brings his wife out for some reason.
― Johnny Fever, Saturday, 28 November 2009 07:54 (fourteen years ago) link
like for a walk or to get her rabies shot
― hope this helps (Granny Dainger), Saturday, 28 November 2009 07:56 (fourteen years ago) link
wait bono is married?
― itdn put butt in the display name (gbx), Saturday, 28 November 2009 08:04 (fourteen years ago) link
which one is she (l? r?)
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2008/10/25/article-1080636-023AEDFF000005DC-479_468x374.jpg
― ♪♫(●̲̲̅̅̅̅=̲̲̅̅̅̅●̲̅̅)♪♫ (Steve Shasta), Saturday, 28 November 2009 08:05 (fourteen years ago) link
c'mon, she's not hard to look at:
http://www.thedailygreen.com/cm/thedailygreen/images/56/bono-ali.jpg
― Johnny Fever, Saturday, 28 November 2009 08:06 (fourteen years ago) link
http://evilbeetgossip.film.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/tiger_elin-500x592.jpg
― Johnny Fever, Saturday, 28 November 2009 08:17 (fourteen years ago) link
sorta reminds me of anna nicole smith
― iatee, Saturday, 28 November 2009 08:20 (fourteen years ago) link
Where's that thread about how Bono sans glasses is Robin Williams....
― kingfish, Saturday, 28 November 2009 09:11 (fourteen years ago) link
LOL have been calling Bono 'Mork from Cork' since the release of October.
― The BFD (suzy), Saturday, 28 November 2009 09:15 (fourteen years ago) link
B-but he's from Dublin.
― Alba, Saturday, 28 November 2009 10:20 (fourteen years ago) link
(duh I know but too OPEN GOAL not to pass up for the sake of a joke)
― The BFD (suzy), Saturday, 28 November 2009 10:35 (fourteen years ago) link
i mean wtf
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Saturday, 28 November 2009 18:09 (fourteen years ago) link
gayo from mayo
― velko, Saturday, 28 November 2009 18:27 (fourteen years ago) link
as well to make a joke referring to his scottishness
― Louis Cll (darraghmac), Saturday, 28 November 2009 18:36 (fourteen years ago) link
Isn't she swedish and doesn't she have a twin sister? I often wonder how the twin sister is doing. At least she doesn't have a husband who drives an Escalade. When they mentioned the woman he philandered with (okay okay fucked), I thought the name sounded familiar. Then I realized she's the one who also seduced the dude from Angel and Bones.
Anyway, this is kinda silly really. They fought about his crappy car and whether or not he fucked that chick in it. Big fucking deal.
― Nathalie (stevienixed), Saturday, 28 November 2009 19:41 (fourteen years ago) link
This story has a fair way to go then...
― Lord Byron Bay of Pigs (SeekAltRoute), Saturday, 28 November 2009 23:39 (fourteen years ago) link
well you all make good points glad this piece of shit got his legs broke
― Blues Guitar Solo Heatmap (Free Download) (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Wednesday, 24 February 2021 23:41 (three years ago) link
I'm sure you know this, but that's not even remotely what I mean. I've always been a huge fan, as most of this thread makes clear. Just suggesting that there's likely more to this than a simple bad-luck accident. We may never know. There are no charges and seemingly no desire to investigate, and since no other driver is involved, and his life has been irrevocably damaged, I think that's a good call.
― clemenza, Thursday, 25 February 2021 00:00 (three years ago) link
Sorry to press the point--I have a particular animus towards speeders in everyday life.
― clemenza, Thursday, 25 February 2021 00:01 (three years ago) link
First news I've heard in months.
https://www.cnn.com/2021/11/29/golf/tiger-woods-full-time-golf-over-spt/index.html
― clemenza, Tuesday, 30 November 2021 00:22 (two years ago) link
I thought he was basically picking and choosing when the accident happened.
― clemenza, Tuesday, 30 November 2021 00:23 (two years ago) link
Would be shocked to ever see him playing again tbh. Dude now has more major surgeries than major titles
― frogbs, Tuesday, 30 November 2021 00:34 (two years ago) link
alright, consider me shocked.
― frogbs, Sunday, 10 April 2022 02:34 (two years ago) link
life crash?
https://www.espn.com/golf/story/_/id/35812811/tiger-woods-girlfriend-asks-judge-resolve-nda-dispute
― omar little, Wednesday, 8 March 2023 20:05 (one year ago) link