rolling FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS thread

being bored of available food is like the quintessential first world problem. sometimes i try to remind myself that i have access to a wider variety of food than most monarchs throughout history. i have a pineapple in my fridge at home. it's unheard of from a historical (and geographical) perspective to have that kind of access to exotic foods. (and assuming a solution isn't found for peak oil, we may be in a unique moment of history past and future where these things are affordable and available). xp

being bored of available food is like the quintessential first world problem

I know - that's why I posted it!

lol of course. i'm agreeing w/ u :P

Hmm, Panera, maybe I'll go there for lunch.

if only henry viii had panera, maybe wed all be catholic

-ran out of coffee this morning, had to go to mcdonalds

-no one wants to turn my tumblr into a book deal

been thinking abt this thread a lot, being in a real 3rd world country for the month.

some submissions:

- waiters will never, ever, under any circumstances, bring you your check (or even ask if you want it) until you directly ask them for it. even if your food is bagged up and there is money on the table.

- internet cafes that only have IE

- using alt-gr for the @ sign and bbcode []

- having to wait until the bus is full before you leave

- FALSE GRANOLA (made w/puffed rice)

- no running water except from 5 am to 9 am

- waiters will never, ever, under any circumstances, bring you your check (or even ask if you want it) until you directly ask them for it. even if your food is bagged up and there is money on the table.

never had my cheque brought to me unsolicited before (and have only been asked if i wanted the cheque on a handful of occasions).

i like referring to the bill as "la dolorosa" when i'm in a spanish speaking country. you either get a laugh or you get looked at like you're a weirdo.

I couldn't get over making the "holding out your palm like a pad and squiggling your finger like a pencil" gesture to get the bill. Seemed like the rudest thing to me, but happily expected by the staff.

what's the sign in America?

I usually hold an imaginary pen in the air and sign an invisible chit, but I assume that's pretty much the same thing

we do the same thing in the US, i dont know what PP is talking about

I usually do it without the pad - just scribble in the air with one hand.

Clapping twice briskly while holding your chin up is also the norm here.

i just wipe my arm over the table and let all the plates and glasses clatter to the floor and scream "FINISHED!"

i poop out the food i just ate and then hand it to the waiter and say "were even"

i just always drop a $100 bill on the table when i'm done and yell "keep the change" on my way out

i walk out without paying and when they chase me down the street i say "i own this restaurant" and then i say "youre fired"

I tweet the restaurant requesting a bill and if it doesn't come within 90 seconds I leave and start a hashtag campaign.

i accidentally rub my hair in the flame of the candle on the table, shove my hand into the spaghetti sauce, start writing FUCK in huge letters on the wall with my right palm, and sprint out the store, where one of my friends is waiting for me with a fire extinguisher

i'm bored. at my job. which i have. in a climate-controlled office. where i get paid a reasonable amount for my time.

xp i have a friend waiting for me with a fire extinguisher so i'll say this

being bored of available food is like the quintessential first world problem

another food-related one: being annoyed that daphne's (fast-food greek chain in socal) started putting thousand island on their gyro "street pitas," and that i was so mildly inconvenienced by having to scrape it off with a knife. food made with fresh ingredients, including green vegetables, in a restaurant that adheres to strict health and sanitation codes. it was a hellish experience!!!!!

but that is an abomination

i agree. sigh. this place changed its menu recently to become more "californian," because of financial difficulties. apparently that means thousand island (which i always ask restos to leave off; it's not my thing).

I've always thought that making the exaggerated "writing your own ticket" gesture to a server was pretty stuck up.

Another thing I noticed in some other countries is if you're crossing the street and a car slows down to let you cross, you can do this Marie Antoinette, palm-up, come hither motion to "thank" the driver for yielding. Like what a nod of the head would do in the US.

http://www.gizmag.com/coolware-personal-cooling-system/18431/

don't y'all live in first-world countries?

i was surprised to see that this thread had 36 new answers but it turns out it was just a classic ilx mixture of 'politics of messenger bags'-style narcissism of small differences back & forth and escalation of horrible jokes

opening "rolling FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS thread" on ilx with 36 new answers and finding them to be just a classic ilx mixture of 'politics of messenger bags'-style narcissism of small differences back & forth and escalation of horrible jokes ;_;

every day I fill my water bottle (nalgene) at work with too much water from the water cooler and I have to dump some at the end of the day because I don't want my nalgene o get that halitosis smell and I feel bad about wasting potable water

According to a person who wrote a book about first world water who I heard interviewed on NPR, you should dump the extra water on a plant or something.

or post it to the sahara region

when I want to post an update on Facebook, I have to click on a button, but when I want to leave a comment I just hit Return - what's that all about?

http://whitewhine.com/

Haha - that's actually funny!

i'm bored. at my job. which i have. in a climate-controlled office. where i get paid a reasonable amount for my time.

― pan loco y salsa loca (get bent), Tuesday, 19 April 2011 02:24 (2 days ago)

otmfm

enjoying http://whitewhine.com thanks michael WHITE

agonizing over what to put as the subject of an email

spent my last $5 cash on a protein shake when leaving the gym yesterday, then remembered it was the last day before payday and the last two weeks have drained my bank account and i didn't have anything to eat for dinner at home.

when i got home i grabbed this coffee can i keep spare change in which i'm sure had about $30 or $40 in it.

i spent the next hour driving to three different grocery stores that had coin-counting machines only to find that the first two were out of order and the 3rd didn't have one anymore.

frustrated and hungry, i checked my bank balance on my smart phone and realized that i actually had a few dollars in my checking account so i bought a box of macaroni and cheese, went home, ate it, then watched the "deserts" episode of Human Planet, which featured a segment on Tubu women who ride camels and walk through the Sahara for three days just to get to a well.

:-\

You can actually pay for things with change, you know. As if it were money.

you don't have direct deposit?

i have direct deposit but today is my pay day and this story took place last nite

Our change barrel is now so full that we can't get any more change in it. Fuck change.

so if you'd used your bank card, the transaction wouldn't have hit/cleared until today, when you got paid, so you wouldn't have been overdrawn, right?

sarahel maybe re-read my post

or just click on another thread

i read your post twice! your "first world problem" isn't even a "problem"!

"enduring needless nitpicking from sarahel" qualifies as a first world problem tho right?