Insomnia.

http://images.spoof-media.com/thespoof/pdi/231206-0030prince.jpg

It doesn't look like we're going to get a break from hearing his name uttered aloud anytime soon either, unfortunately. I wish he would go with a symbol.

TCotRNCfkaR

I know it's uncharitable and not his fault, but his name is sound vomit to my brain. The sound of the beast.

I think I want it to be Prince Rebus.

wash Prius, rinse Prius
hit head on pavement
REINCE PRIEBUS

i haven't heard his name in a week! but i did have trouble sleeping last night.

oh man LL I had this same thing happen to me!

a friend of mine posted on FB about how he "reinced his priebus" and I couldn't get it out of my head. And now that I've written it down I fear it'll be back again. :/

the only thing you can do is not think about it and if the toxic priebus gets under your skin, wash it off.

wait, i mean

REINCE IT OFF

aaaaaaaaaahahahahhahahahahahahah

Reince Reince lemonade round the corner Preibus made

Aagggghhhhh

http://media2.kshb.com//photo/2012/05/13/mtp_20120513120336_320_240.GIF

it's 6am, i might as well stop pretending and get up to do things. but god do i hate this, especially the fact that i go to bed feeling reasonably tired, like my entire body is telling me to go to sleep but then my mind starts focusing on silly things and i can't seem to switch it off. tonight for example i started thinking about hemingway and his six word story (which may or may not be a true story) and my mind just couldn't stop making up 6 word stories.

mind starts focusing on silly things and i can't seem to switch it off
silly things aren't so silly if they keep you awake.

really wish my brain was on my side sometimes.
really struggling with sleep lately, when i have to get up and go to work, that's when i start getting tired.

my insomnia battles continue, but they're waaaaay better than they used to be. i get ~6-7 hours nightly on a regular basis, sometimes more. i just give myself permission to stay up until i feel sleepier rather than forcing myself to bed at 10 or whatever.

i will, however, note that i flushed the ambien down the toilet in a symbolic gesture against that malevolent drug.

you should have mailed it to me instead

I can't condone that medication -- it's toxic. I'd be afraid for you if you took it! If you want more deets, I'll tell you privately.

it's worked fine for me in very intermittent doses?

Fucking horrible last night after warming up the previous two... A side effect of the steroids I take as part of chemotherapy, but it took 4 weeks to show up. I don't want to call the doctor cuz I don't want another fucking prescription.

I think I managed to drift off for about an hour on 2 or 3 occasions, during one of which I dreamed I worked for elderly Frank Sinatra, getting his mail.

:/

i would say talk to yr doc anyway. the last thing you want while going through chemo is to feel even worse for not sleeping. I mean, insomnia's bad enough when you're healthy, you know? and if it's chemical, maybe it's just a simple change or diff dosage.

sorry dude, that seriously sucks. but, on the upside, cool dream! :)

jesus morbs, i don't think i understood you were going through chemo. fuck. i'm really sorry to hear that.
are you getting by okay out there?

It's a rollercoaster, but I'm getting better. Just some new bumps from the meds these days.

Good thoughts going out to you man.

my sleeping has gotten so wacky thanks to insomnia and no particular schedule most of the time that i've decided to do the classic realignment tactic of staying up through a whole night and whole day and hopefully then falling asleep at normal human time. i'm really looking forward to being out and about during the morning tomorrow!!

i've been doing this most weekends lately : /

Morbs, I am sorry about chemo, that really sucks.

I think I need to go back on sleep meds, but my health insurance no longer covers medication. Basically I've taken to bumming pain and sleep meds off a relative who had surgery!

Tylenol PM works okay but you have to take more than two at a time to get knocked out.

sixth hour

sorry dude.

Aw Morbs, I'm sorry you are experiencing this. I had the same reaction to a dose of steroids; luckily I was only on them for two weeks. Once I finished I got right back to sleeping like a baby. Hang in there, good man!

Does this ever hit anyone else randomly? Like, "hmmm, I didn't realize I wouldn't be able to sleep tonight..." after weeks of a normal sleep pattern?

on topic, I hope Morbz finally got some sleep.

yes. seeing as i just woke up at 5.30 after going to bed at 2.30

good....... evening?

Morbs, do they not give you oxy/hydrocodone prescriptions? That would help,no? How long is your chemo course?

Mount Cleaners, I take old school Temazepam which is 20 something dollars without insurance.

I've been given Nitrazepam, i had been taking Zopiclone, but the Doc wouldn't prescribe any more as they are very addictive apparently. These Nitrazepam can be taken daily so you can get into a routine/sleep pattern. Once I've had one, you can pretty much set your watch for 40mins and you'll be out. They are quite trippy just as you start to nod off, they also make you yawn a ridiculous amount after taking them. I still wake up in the night, but i can at least get back to sleep, without them once i wake up i stay up. There's no hangover feel or grogginess in the mornings which is a bonus.

I have acetaminophen-oxycodone, ss, which I prefer not to take unless I'm in pain. (And in the chemo-free weeks, I prefer a moderate amount of alcohol.) I took one last night before bed bcz my arms hurt some. Still woke up at 5 a.m. The next chemo fortnight is my last one before being evaluated for stem-cell transplant.

Zopiclone one of the least addictive sleeping pills available, although as with most, it can be brutal if you stop cold turkey - best to taper off slowly. Bigger problem is the awful metallic taste some people (about 1 in 3) get in their mouth for the next 24 hours after taking it. It is effective as a sleeping pill.

Ambien (a.k.a. zolpidem) works great for me.

Oxycodone and hydrocodone don't make me sleepy and generally aren't indicated for insomnia, but they are excellent pain relievers.

home for xmas is a bad time for this

i got it too, past 3 days

http://www.granta.com/New-Writing/Kopfkino

i skipped through all the "this is my own personal nightmare" stuff and found this

There’s a term in German, Kopfkino, which means the imagination left to run wild, often magnifying the disturbing, unpleasant thoughts best kept at the mind’s edge.

i think this is also otm

We are, to a large extent, our own jail keepers. Our conditions define us, add contours, accents, drama to our lives. And the longer they accompany us, our so-called afflictions, the more years we spend together, the harder it is to part ways.

Using insomnia as an anaesthetic is definitely effective even if it has a lot of negative side effects (like every anaesthetic). I've been a lot better lately, not sure why. Fatigue from feeling fatigued?

Another night of no sleep. I'm twitching, my heart rate is crazy, my guts are wobbly, I feel so ILL and DISGUSTING and FUCKED UP, and I can't make plans to do anything to help with my other problems because I can never tell if I'll have collapsed by early afternoon or if I'll be far too shaky and fucked to leave the house again. I have Zopiclone but my doctor has told me not to take it too often so I can't ever get to a stage where my sleep cycle actually resets. Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh.

i started taking cymbalta last week and i have to say that although it doesn't get you to sleep, the sleep you do get is high quality. well, certainly 1000x better than any sleep ive ever experienced.

Zopiclone is vile, emil.y, as I know I've said before! Have you worked things out at all?

Glad cymbalta is working for you ss, getting to sleep is 90% of my problem...

I've been routinely up until 2 or 3 a.m. since coming to Nigeria, sometimes later. It's an hour ahead of the UK and I haven't adjusted, after 3 weeks. On top of my usual insomnia, it's very hot, and I don't breathe well with A/C on. I'm out of Ambien and have only Atarax, which is a total dud. One of those long half-life drugs that makes you drowsy for 24 hours instead of all-asleep for 8. It's not actually a sleeping pill: my GP is a twunt.

I AM QUITE FED UP AND TIRED NOW BRANE. YOU CAN SHUT UP, THX.

what are you doing in nigeria?

Apart from lying awake at 3am cursing my GP, my brane, the heat, lyfe, Goblin Boy and all hys works, etc. etc.? Hanging out in one of the British Embassy compounds mostly, redrafting a novel, swimming, quaffing g&t's. I'm in Abuja, which is like if they'd made Milton Keynes the capital of England. Hotter. It's boring but having a pool in which to unkink my writer's neck is A++.

I wish I had a more interesting reason to be here, but so it goes. My hostess has an exciting job (British representative to ECOWAS), and she spent last week covering for the British ambassador to Mali, up in Bamako. She had 8 bodyguards and ate out for every meal. I wasn't allowed to go. Sadface.

that's a pretty exciting reason. then again my standards are v low for excitement :)

yeah that sounds pretty cool, aside from the non-sleeping part!

It is pretty cool. I do wish I could get out of the compound more, though. We went out a lot in Cote d'Ivoire and I accompanied her up country for meetings with warlords & such, but she was flying solo in Abidjan whereas this is a full-scale mission, with rules and rule-enforcement. Also, Mali. I still think of... let's call her Paddington... I still think of us both as mostly being about 17, so it's a bit weird to wake up and find she's acting head of mission in Mali.