The Hobbit films, previously to be directed by Guillermo del Toro and now to be directed by Peter Jackson again.

Ah yes.

"You left the East Wind to me," said Gimli, "but I will say naught of it."
"That is as it should be," said Aragorn. "In Minas Tirith they endure the East Wind, but they do not ask it for tidings."

Transl: "I'm not fucking singing." "Good, we'd rather not have to fucking listen, lol."

If that had ended up in the film I suspect farts would have been involved.

This movie was not marketed as a Disney film or a musical, it was marketed as "Serious adventure is serious, and also hobbits."

Yea, but if it had included all/most of the songs from the books, obviously the marketing would've been different too.

And why can't a musical be serious? Do you think The Umbrellas of Cherbourg is not serious?

The movie was what it was. Of all the criticisms that were provided, and they were legion, I don't recall any of them being "Not enough musical numbers!"

i saw QI tonight (maybe a rerun, in fact do episodes of QI ever air in originality or do they come into being pre-viewed and full-fledged as reruns? i digress) and sandy toksvig was there in a red jacket and i thought to myself that she would make a splendid hobbit, a first-rate bilbo indeed. too late now, but maybe there'll be a chance before her clogs are self-popped for a scriptwriter to have a decent crack at the franchise, eh

i've decided i don't hate Tolkein just this lame literalist murdering of everything that was decent in his books

― syntax evasion (Noodle Vague), Friday, 28 September 2012

confident that this too shall pass and you will indeed in the fulness of time remember that you do in fact hate tolkien

Much as I will probably quite enjoy these, I kind of hope they flop massively just to teach everyone a lesson.

And that somebody on the internet does a single two hour edit of all three that everybody agrees is much better.

Hmm...

http://www.empireonline.com/news/story.asp?NID=35541

I hope he's Bard.

Hahaha if only.

"Black arrow! You've never failed me, and I've always recovered you. I had you from my father, and he from of old. If ever you came from the forges of the true King under the Mountain, go now and speed well!"

songwise, there's the part in the fellowship movie where sam recites a little poem about gandalf's fireworks in lothlorien. watched it once w a friend, and sam says "the finest rockets ever seen / they burst in stars of blue and green / or after thunder, silver showers" and friend suddenly yells "THAT WAS ONE OF GANDALF'S POWERS". still laugh.

HA!

was the green dragon song merry and pippin sing in rotk in the theatrical cut or the extended? ages since i've watched it. was that in the book?

Theatrical IIRC. Not in the book (nor was that whole sequence, because what happened was *two hour lecture follows, everyone flees*).

movies cut out lots of lectures iirc. Also the multiple decades between the birthday party and Frodo fleeing the shire.

http://www.theonering.net/torwp/2012/10/22/63709-tolkiendrim-com-hi-res-photo-of-bolg-spoilers/#

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mbvowvopaT1rqyl6qo2_250.jpg

I'm kind of seeing

http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20090817155808/heman/images/2/29/Beastman1.jpg + http://www.warmphotos.net/img/music/black/black02.jpg

A Saturday morning cartoon about Immortal would be the bollocks.

That's a shit costume.

saw the trailer in the theater the other day and i'm kinda dreading this. i haven't been so much of a JRRT fanatic since i was 12 (tho i'm still enough of one that i get upset when someone casually suggests that jackson's overcooked trilogy is better than the books) but 'the hobbit' is one of my favorite kids' books in the world and i have no desire to see it mucked up with a bunch of pseudo-serious 'this is the real backstory' bullshit. i dug all the LOTR movies at the time but, lke DLH upthread, really don't think that the jackson/LOTR vibe is suited AT ALL for this story and these characters. but yeah, i'm sure i'll still see it.

bilbo baggins is such a great character -- he's like if bertie wooster was suddenly forced into danger and had to develop some jeeves-y cleverness.

http://www.mediabistro.com/prnewser/dennys-hobbit-menu_b48172

Rejoice, ye fans of Bilbo, Frodo, Gandalf and “second breakfast”! Thanks to Denny’s, you no longer need to live in The Shire to eat like a Hobbit. As part of a joint marketing effort with the upcoming flick The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey, the restaurant chain is about to launch a special, limited-time-only menu chock full of Middle Earth-inspired delights.

Beginning November 6, Tolkien fans can choose from 11 breakfast, lunch, and dinner items including “Hobbit Hole Breakfast”, “Frodo’s Pot Roast Skillet,” and “Gandalf’s Gobble Melt”. Denny’s offers plenty of options for any mealtime, whether you’re sitting down to enjoy breakfast, second breakfast, elevensies, luncheon, afternoon tea, dinner or supper.

In support of its promotional menu, the company will launch an accompanying ad campaign including a full TV spot (sneak peek below) set to begin airing on November 12–roughly a month before the movie’s December 14 release. Denny’s hopes to cash in on fans’ growing anticipation by offering trading cards with each special entree; the chain also plans to print QR-coded place mats that enthusiasts can use to unlock movie-related content like videos and online games.

"Hobbit Hole Breakfast" what is this I can't even

gandalf's gobble melt.

anyway this is america we've been eating like hobbits for like sixty years now

Frodo's Pot Roast Skillet is the only one that doesn't sound like an unspeakable sexual act

hobbit hole breakfast already has a subreddit iirc

It gets worse:

Hobbit Harvest Pies
Lonely Mountain Treasure
Radagast's Red Velvet Pancake Puppies
Bilbo's Berry Smoothie
Lone-lands Campfire Cookie Milk Shake

wtf are "Radagast's Red Velvet Pancake Puppies"

like anyone cares about radagast.

They are little red hush puppies made of pancake dough. I only know this because of GIS btw.

but... red velvet implies they are chocolate? chocolate pancake hush puppies?

http://www.discountqueens.com/uploads/2011/11/Red-Velvet-Pancake-Puppies.jpg

radagast should probably see a doctor

red velvet pancake poopies

hobbit harvest pies

how closely related are these to cow pies I wonder

Rereading The Fellowship of the Ring recently, I'm pleased to find that my pre-Jackson ways of imagining these scenes have remained intact. I'm not obliged to view Sauron as literally a GIANT EYE.

http://flyingmoose.org/tolksarc/sauron.gif

Hahah um, I think the original link has been changed a bit...but not by much, really.

We wants it, we needs it. Must have the precious bandwidth. They stole it from us.

http://i.imgur.com/EhzpW.gif

Sauron and family at his wedding:

http://static.rateyourmusic.com/lk/f/a/eb2df878168967bd6d7083481ec37694/1121095.jpg

so all jokes aside i thought i'd still go and see this but i caught the trailer tonight and freeman's 'fair enough' and thorin proving that yet again jackson mistakes speaking slowly for charisma has convinced me that this is a book i don't need a shitty scriptwriter with a flair for visuals to misinterpret for me over a nine hour period

somehow i do not remember bilbo's mood at the start of the book being quite the equivalent of martin freeman running along shouting 'i'm going on an ADVENTURE!'

i'm going to capture jackson and turn him into the gluttony character from se7en

crossed with the writer in misery

chain the fucker to a desk, make him eat and type all day.

Looking at the pictures of the Dennys hobbit meals genuinely nauseated me.

yeah, good point, we'll make him eat those all day

Just funnel the pancake puppies down his throat.

Lots of crazy spoilers

http://io9.com/5954767/massive-secrets-of-the-hobbit--revealed

For instance:

Bombur is quite naïve, and doesn't know what to expect on this journey, but don't underestimate him. He can use his beard—which is braided into an enormous loop—as a weapon. He throws it over his enemies' heads, pulls them into his massive girth, and strangles them. Otherwise, he mostly cooks.

One thing you will notice as soon as you walk into Stone Street Studios is that there are massive green screens everywhere. You can take tours of the real-life places where Lord of the Rings was filmed, but The Hobbit is a largely indoor affair. Where Lord of the Rings was a masterpiece of forced perspective, Jackson opted to try something different this time around.

To film Bilbo, the Dwarves, Gandalf, and the other characters at their respective heights, The Hobbit employs slave motion capture technology, specifically SimulCam. For example, when Gandalf is talking to the Dwarves and Bilbo in Bag End, the Dwarves are over on the set, and Ian McKellan is on a sound stage standing in front of a green screen.

oh good.