I'mma lay your LOLs on the dresser and EXCELSIOR them shits with a spiked bat!

lol

Re: Hugo Chavez:

--

a buncha good links in this Slate article: http://www.theforce.net/kids/coruscant/probe_droid/palpatine.jpg

― the little prince of inane false binary hype (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, March 6, 2013 9:08 AM (5 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

it's got some good building meter data too

― Doctor Casino, Wednesday, March 6, 2013 9:19 AM (5 hours ago)

Omfg

hahah

And, amazingly, this showed up on the Star Wars 7 Shit Talk thread. What is it about Shakey and Star Wars threads?

empty posturing from a loathsome senator? tell me more

― Donkamole Marvin (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, March 6, 2013 4:53 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol wrong thread sorry

― Donkamole Marvin (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, March 6, 2013 4:53 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

well theoretically you could be talking about palpatine

― zero dark (s1ocki), Wednesday, March 6, 2013 4:54 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hahaha what a day for that. It's like the Far Side/Dennis the Menace caption mixups! (Thanks, Ned.)

another day, another Palpatine link

If you crossed Harry with Mick Hucknall you'd get the guy from Toploader.

― Half of these sound like rappers. (snoball), Thursday, March 7, 2013 6:36 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

*ponders googling "Harry Styles Muick Hucknall slashfic", declines*

― bizarro gazzara, Thursday, March 7, 2013 6:52 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

ugh...
Hucknall clearly has a huge boner for them...
One Direction May Be The Next Beatles: Mick Hucknall Says.
“I rather like One Direction, I think they’re good. People can be snobby and say they don’t write their own songs, but it’s the pop industry.”
He added: “When the Beatles first started they were a boyband and then, through their writing, they merged into something else. So who knows what’s going to happen for One Direction.”

― Half of these sound like rappers. (snoball), Thursday, March 7, 2013 7:38 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Mick sighed with relief as he put down the phone. He was beginning to think the journalist would never stop asking him questions.

Suddenly he felt the touch of soft fingers on the back of his neck, running slowly upwards to bury themselves in his flaming red locks.

"So, you 'rather like' One Direction, eh?" laughed Harry, his eyes shining with playful intent in the soft candlelight which lit the silk-draped room. "Oh, if only they knew. If only they knew..."

Then they fucked etc.

― bizarro gazzara, Thursday, March 7, 2013 7:51 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

irl chortling

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/f/f5/BrettAnderson.jpg/220px-BrettAnderson.jpg

"Have you ever tried it that way?"

"Muck Hicknall"

maybe the britishers were really proud of how people from new zealand had made a whole movie

― iatee, Wednesday, March 6, 2013 9:03 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

by jove that island's done it

― christmas candy bar (al leong), Wednesday, March 6, 2013 9:13 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Newsie-wewsie Zealand

A young girl was walking along a beach upon which thousands of horses had been washed up during a terrible storm. When she came to each horse, she would pick it up, and throw it back into the ocean. People watched her with amusement.

She had been doing this for some time when a man approached her and said, “Little girl, why are you doing this? Look at this beach! You can’t save all these horses. You can’t begin to make a difference!”

The girl seemed crushed, suddenly deflated. But after a few moments, she bent down, picked up another horse, and hurled it as far as she could into the ocean. Then she looked up at the man and replied,

“Well, I made a difference to that one!”

― fueled by satanism, violence, and sodomy (elmo argonaut), Thursday, March 7, 2013 2:19 PM (5 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol

presumed that was from RIDING GIANTESS

Anthony Bourdain must be terrible in bed, right? Overly concerned with looking cool and he'd stop mid-thrust to talk about meeting Dee Dee Ramone when both were strung out.

― Kiarostami bag (milo z), Friday, March 8, 2013 9:40 AM (1 minute ago)

lol

Actually the only way I'd ever respect Eric Clapton even a little bit is if he changes the name of this album to I'M AN ASSHOLE

― cwkiii, Friday, March 8, 2013 7:39 PM (22 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Clapton had his pic taken on Tanned Penis Island shortly before Sting's house burned.

― Vol. 3: The Life & Times of E. "Boom" Carter (C. Grisso/McCain), Friday, March 8, 2013 3:25 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i heard a story from some people who worked on a pretty high profile...ancillary star wars entertainment product ....

anyway they heard word that lucas was very excited about the project and was, in fact, so excited about it that he had come up with a brand new character expressly for this project that would become part of the official star wars canon, etc.

obviously everyone was really excited.

the day came for lucas to meet with them. lucas coming to their offices was basically like the fuckin' pope or president coming, huge deal, big preparation, everyone's buzzing around etc etc

so they finally sit down with lucas in the conference room, and he starts by saying how impressed he was, how he wanted this product to be a real core part of star wars lore, blah blah blah...

then he says, "So the character I've created for the [project] is..."

*everyone leans forward, anticipating with bated breath*

"....Darth...Icky"

so they're like, "Darth...Icky"

and he's like, "yes, Darth Icky - I-C-K-Y" and begins to explain the character

so then after they were all freaking out like how the fuck are we gonna write around this retarded character etc, eventually they just drug their feet on it for long enough that lucas had moved on to his next brilliant idea and forgot about it and the public never knew of Darth Icky.

― u r the best magician ever. my bad levitate me pls (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Friday, March 8, 2013 5:14 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol, i completely believe that story

I was going to say.

and he's like, "yes, Darth Icky - I-C-K-Y" and begins to explain the character

this is what kills me

Darth Stinky
Darth Yuck
Darth Slimy

"see, he's ICKY is what he is"

Darth Doyousee

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y153/struggin/Untitled.png

Those are some weird tits.

agony tits

srs tits

Seriously wonder if EVERYTHING in the Star Wars canon post-1978 is one long elaborate Lucas troll on the human race. Suckers!

From I Love Hoops, edited for maximum lolz:

Dave McMenaminVerified account
‏@mcten
Kobe when asked about 'fear': "I don't f--- with bees, man. Other than that, I'm not afraid of nothing."

― 乒乓, Saturday, March 9, 2013 6:47 AM

utah jazz sign bees to a 10-day contract

― lag∞n, Saturday, March 9, 2013 7:09 AM

lool

Lol

am0n do you have a twitter???

― 乒乓, Friday, February 1, 2013 6:26 AM (1 month ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

for a brief time but only to troll jose canseco

― am0n, Friday, February 1, 2013 6:30 AM (1 month ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

u r basically dees illustrations. com
why don't u just dig up thomas nast and vom on his bones, fool

― slam dunk, Sunday, March 10, 2013 10:17 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

OK, I feel like an idiot. How do I listen to this thing? I followed links to iTunes, but it just opens up a page that says JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE next to a photo of JT, and there's nothing to click on.

― jaymc, Monday, March 11, 2013 7:44 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

This is way better than I expected it to be.

jaymc - click on the bottom of the album cover art to the left

― i kant believe it's not buffon (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Monday, March 11, 2013 7:48 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i got that too, and assume it's because i haven't downloaded the supposedly terrible latest iTunes update. have decided i'm fine w/ waiting to hear the JT. (xp)

― some dude, Monday, March 11, 2013 7:48 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

ps the stream won't work if you're on your phone -- has to be computer or ipad

― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, March 11, 2013 7:50 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Actually it wasn't working on my desktop computer (not sure what the issue is -- I just upgraded last week), but I see it is working on my iPad.

― jaymc, Monday, March 11, 2013 7:52 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

if you've downloaded too much hentai it won't work iirc

― balls, Monday, March 11, 2013 7:56 PM Bookmark

http://25.media.tumblr.com/3f3c7566ac1e3384796cb7bedd2a9a66/tumblr_mjdti4vCmA1qdlh1io1_400.gif

prefer vagina

― слабоумие и отвага (cozen), Tuesday, March 12, 2013 8:51 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

imperative mood

― слабоумие и отвага (cozen), Tuesday, March 12, 2013 8:51 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

from the origins of the faux-naif blog voice thread:

i feel like ilx is always in danger of succumbing to this tone

― Mordy, Tuesday, March 12, 2013 6:14 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Totally!

― Creames Fartpoop, Tuesday, March 12, 2013 6:21 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i leave work, there's no pope. 40 minutes later, there's a pope. what a world!

― call all destroyer, Wednesday, March 13, 2013 2:46 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-mTUdpylg544/UKt3drZ9H4I/AAAAAAAABVo/DV-EOVuVyY4/s1600/what+a+country.jpg

i'm sure whoever is chosen will be great
― k3vin k., Wednesday, March 13, 2013 2:32 PM (24 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

for me to pope on
― k3vin k., Wednesday, March 13, 2013 2:33 PM (24 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

<3

lol kev

rip alex chilton

somebody let kathryn know that she doesnt get to be pope

― O_o-O_O-o_O (jjjusten), Wednesday, March 13, 2013 3:04 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

[...]

maybe they could get her up on the dais, but a pope hat on her and hand her some flowers, and then all the cardinals pull the string that drops the bucket of lambs blood on her

― O_o-O_O-o_O (jjjusten), Wednesday, March 13, 2013 3:05 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Pope Dad From TV's "Alf"

― christmas candy bar (al leong), Wednesday, March 13, 2013 12:27 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

sioux city is pretty to look at for sure. I also had one of the most painful dental experiences of my life there so I may be biased

― not feeling those lighters (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Thursday, March 14, 2013 5:00 PM (23 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

you should sioux the dentist

― veryupsetmom (harbl), Thursday, March 14, 2013 5:22 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink