The new rolling ILX parenting thread, since the other one was getting unwieldy

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nath, do you mean they won't have time until april? are you thinking of putting ophelia in daycare when the new baby arrives?

No, the daycare, which is in the same street as our shop, doesn't have any place available until April. This is not good news. But since the busiest season (hopefully!) starts at the end of March, it's better than no place at all. And they put me (or rather the baby) on the waiting list and we do get priority because Ophelia will go this year. On top of that our salesperson is most probably pregnant and will deliver at the same time. This could be seen as GREBT, and it is, but on the other hand it's not good since she won't be available when we (or rather I) really need her in the shop. *sigh*

Hopefully Meg delivers! YAY for delivering babies. :-) My water had to be broken. Felt really fun, even though I know that sounds a bit weird. :-)

― nathalie, Friday, 23 February 2007 08:13 (seventeen years ago) link

It WAS labour! H0wie arrived at 8.38am on Saturday after 48 hours of back labour, which ended in a dash to the labour ward for an epidural and ventouse delivery. More details when I have more time... but I am very happy :)

― Meg Busset, Monday, 26 February 2007 16:27 (seventeen years ago) link

Yay congratulations!!!! Awesome news! (uh, except for the back labor - ouch!)

― Sara R-C, Monday, 26 February 2007 16:29 (seventeen years ago) link

YAY!!!! well done Meg, and hello to Howie! Do we get to see a photo of the wee man? Sorry to hear about the back labour, and 48 hours, my goodness, but I'm sure it was all worth it!

― Vicky, Monday, 26 February 2007 16:30 (seventeen years ago) link

Congrats, Meg! February babies are good babies.

― Michael Jones, Monday, 26 February 2007 21:31 (seventeen years ago) link

howie, what a great name! congratulations!

― teeny, Monday, 26 February 2007 23:25 (seventeen years ago) link

Hooray for Howie!

― Ned Raggett, Monday, 26 February 2007 23:26 (seventeen years ago) link

CONGRATULATIONS Meg!!! Can't wait for Howie to make his debut appearance here :)

― Archel, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 12:49 (seventeen years ago) link

Howie! What a GREBT name!!!! I absolutely love it. :-D Happy that you're happy though, boo on the 48 hrs of back labour!

I did a stupid thing of course. I googled for info on the link between lack of morning sickness and having a son. What did I find? That many women tend to miscarriage. EK! Of course I immediately textmesaged my friend who, the sweetie she is, called me up (in the middle of my knitting class) and said I should not google such info. :-) I'm feeling slightly *off* but not as much as with Ophelia. We'll see how it turns out. I'll probably feel crap by the end of the week as retaliation. ;-)

The one thing that does happen now that I'm pregnant: I smell stinky diapers all the time. hah.

My mum suggested we put the two kids in one room. WAH? ARETH THOU MAD! No way. Has anyone done this? I'm not very keen to do this.

Shit, I'm having another kid. PANIC ALERT! :-) (insert blinking red light) :-)

― nathalie, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:08 (seventeen years ago) link

My mum suggested we put the two kids in one room. WAH? ARETH THOU MAD! No way. Has anyone done this? I'm not very keen to do this.

I used to share a room with my brother until I was about six, I think.

― ailsa, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:17 (seventeen years ago) link

O seems to be a good sleeper, she'll probably sleep through any fuss the baby makes. I think this whole one room per kid thing is so new and decadent! And I always heard that you get more morning sickness with girls (although I know plenty of moms with the reverse experience too). I didn't have much morning sickness at all, it was more like a compulsion to keep my stomach full so I wouldn't feel queasy. Yeah they say that morning sickness is a biological protectionary measure to keep you away from environmental stuff that could make you miscarry, but the vast vast vast majority of miscarriages are going to be because of some genetic strangeness and beyond your control. I think they just talk about the morning sickness protecting against miscarriage to make the morning sickies feel better. :)

― teeny, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:26 (seventeen years ago) link

so are you gonna find out the gender this time? and are you gonna tell us? ;)

― teeny, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:28 (seventeen years ago) link

Me too. (With my sister, not with ailsa'a brother. That would just have been odd.)

My parents had a three bedroom house but we had a lodger in the third bedroom for years. Bunk beds rule, nath!

― Archel, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:28 (seventeen years ago) link

Ha, I used to share a room with our lodger at one point, with my two brothers in the other bedroom. In fact, for about six months, when I was about seven and my brother was five, we shared a BED for about nine months while our house was getting built and we were all living with my aunt.

Re: morning sickness, my mum puked for about eight months with me, and not at all with my brother.

― ailsa, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:36 (seventeen years ago) link

Alice's new favourite snack - daddy's nose:

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/183/404593266_fbe060be5a.jpg?v=0

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/162/404593252_cc05e6ca6a.jpg?v=0

― Archel, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:46 (seventeen years ago) link

I was about 4 when my brother was born and his crib was in my room. He used to wake me up by holding on the rail and throwing his stuffed animals at me.

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 13:50 (seventeen years ago) link

I did a stupid thing of course. I googled for info on the link between lack of morning sickness and having a son. What did I find? That many women tend to miscarriage. EK! Of course I immediately textmesaged my friend who, the sweetie she is, called me up (in the middle of my knitting class) and said I should not google such info. :-) I'm feeling slightly *off* but not as much as with Ophelia. We'll see how it turns out. I'll probably feel crap by the end of the week as retaliation. ;-)

The one thing that does happen now that I'm pregnant: I smell stinky diapers all the time. hah.

nath, i didnt get sick at all until 4 months in. ive puked pretty much every day since then. yeah, avoid googling anything. really. everyone is different, of course.

ive been smelling stinky diapers too! when i realized it was like OH MY GOD IM SMELLING THE FUTURE!!!

anyway, congrats to meg! you peeps are so cool post labor.

archel, daddy + baby pics just kill me! so adorable.

― sunny successor, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 14:19 (seventeen years ago) link

also, im due TODAY and here I am sitting at work. woo.

― sunny successor, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 14:19 (seventeen years ago) link

you're a warrior! any plans for inducement or are you just going to wait the tyke out?

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 14:20 (seventeen years ago) link

inducing on friday if nothing happens in the meantime. id rather wait but doc says my blood pressure has gone crazy since last week. well, its plenty higher, anyways. pleasant plains is pleased because march 2nd is the date he was pulling for. its definitely nice to see an end in sight.

― sunny successor, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 14:33 (seventeen years ago) link

That's Texas Independance Day! (perhaps that will please him less?)

yay for impending birth! are you nervous?

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 14:34 (seventeen years ago) link

UH OH!! dont tell him that!

i am in so much denial right now im not nervous at all. its like part of my brain is all 'oh friday 6 months from now, right? '

thursday night may be a different story!

― sunny successor, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 14:36 (seventeen years ago) link

Hope everything goes well! Hope you don't have to wait until friday!

Archel, those photos are just too cute!

― Vicky, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:15 (seventeen years ago) link

Yes, I know it's a bit decadent, but I do want to give my children their own space. We have the ability, so why not?

so are you gonna find out the gender this time? and are you gonna tell us? ;)

you'll probabmy have to delete itagain. ;-)

― nathalie, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:22 (seventeen years ago) link

We have the ability, so why not?

they might enjoy each other's company?

when they get older and truly need privacy, yes being able to give them their own rooms is awesome.

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:23 (seventeen years ago) link

Alice and dad both look so blissed out :)

― Jaq, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:24 (seventeen years ago) link

Welcome Howie! I also had back labor with Rufus - ouch! I had a scheduled C-section with Cyrus, so no labor at all the second time.

I had virtually no morning sickness with my boys. They've been sleeping in one room now because Cyrus doesn't want to go in his crib anymore. When we build the new house, we'll probably get bunk beds. They like sharing space. They're pals; we're lucky.

― Maria :D, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:36 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh god, now you are all making me feel guilty! I already apologized to my mom saying she was probably right. Maybe it's because I think like an adult and figure they'd like their own little space? Maybe silly. How do I convince my husband this?

― nathalie, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:41 (seventeen years ago) link

haha, like not googling on morning sickness, you probably shouldn't let people on the interweb make you feel guilty. ;)

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:43 (seventeen years ago) link

oh thanks for the update SS! I was about to ask, I knew it was coming up. I think my blood pressure went weird at the end too, it certainly did once they started giving me the drugs. They do so much mom/baby monitoring it's crazy, just remember that just because you have some sign of something wrong doesn't really mean much, it almost always turns out to be nothing.

― teeny, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:44 (seventeen years ago) link

Yes, those pics are so adorable!!!!

― nathalie, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 15:54 (seventeen years ago) link

YAY HOWIE!!!!!!!!!!!!
I've been using photobucket.com for pics, Meg, it's very easy. LET'S SEE HIM!!!! And his tired mama!

― Beth Parker, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 18:35 (seventeen years ago) link

teeny, its totally weird to have high blood pressure because mine is usually really low. did it make you feel hot all of the time? i feel like im radiating heat.

did anyone here do the cord blood stem cell banking thing? im considering it since most of my family has had cancer at some point.

― sunny successor, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 18:40 (seventeen years ago) link

yeah I was hot, I usu run cold. glad I had it in winter. I have no knowledge of cord blood banking other than it's pricey. :(

― teeny, Tuesday, 27 February 2007 21:43 (seventeen years ago) link

Bumping this in advance of poss news...just have a feeling!

― teeny, Friday, 2 March 2007 13:43 (seventeen years ago) link

soon you will have more primary-colored plastic shit in your house than you ever thought imaginable.

― teeny, Friday, 2 March 2007 13:43 (seventeen years ago) link

Blimey, where have the last six days gone? All is well with little H - we are starting to get to grips with the feeding / changing / burping / cuddling routine, and he even let us have about 6 hours' sleep last night (only interrupted twice for feeding and changing) - just as well cause I was starting to get a bit delerious with sleep deprivation. My milk has come in now, which seems to have made it much easier to settle him - luckily he has taken to breastfeeding with no great problems so far (apart from waking up this morning with boobs like great big bags of marbles).

I love him so much!

Re: photos, I'm not very keen on posting pics on public websites, but will have a look at Photobucket and see if I can get something up briefly for y'all to look at.

Oh, and good thoughts for Sunny today! So relieved I went into labour before having to be induced.

― Meg Busset, Friday, 2 March 2007 16:20 (seventeen years ago) link

BEEPS

― gbx, Friday, 2 March 2007 16:22 (seventeen years ago) link

Glad to hear Howie is doing well and the love and milk are aflowin'! Meg, you could always start a flickr account and make photos only visible to friends - ie all of us lot ;)

Come on Beeps!

― Archel, Friday, 2 March 2007 16:26 (seventeen years ago) link

Sounds like things are going well so far Meg. Can you and your partner take turns taking care of Howie while you each catch long naps?

Also remembering the rock hard breast feeling... not fun. I woke up in puddles of milk for a while. A nurse helped me with the rock hard breasts by putting hot wash cloths on them and then putting disposable diapers over them to keep the heat in. Then I nursed or expressed after that and got a lot of the "excess" milk out. Taking a warm bath would probably produce the same effect. It does all even out eventually (thankfully!).

― Sara R-C, Friday, 2 March 2007 16:27 (seventeen years ago) link

Expressing milk is not a good idea, unless you want to alleviate the pain a little, which is what I did. But expressing milk is actually sending a message to your breast to make more milk. Just saying, I don't mean you did wrong, Sara, only that I know some women who did this.

I too awoke in puddles of milk. hah. Very funny but the rockhard breasts are no fun.

Morning sickness has arrived. Boo (in a way).

Today Ophelia went for the first time to daycare. It's a posh place, but very kidfriendly. And parentfriendly as well. She did exceptionally well! I was in tears when I called my husband asking how things went. He had dropped her off as we suspected that me doing it could create problems. We only sent her half a day as we didn't want to overdo it. On monday again. We only do it twice a week. Hopefully she'll do as well as she did today. :-)

― nathalie, Friday, 2 March 2007 16:44 (seventeen years ago) link

Nathalie, you are absolutely right - it is a feedback loop that could keep you overproducing milk. What was happening to me was that my breast tissues were so swollen that the milk that was there wasn't coming out well, despite my using a hospital grade pump (Alex was a preemie and couldn't nurse much). After that first time of using heat, I was able to express a bunch of "extra" milk and then it wasn't such a problem.

Possibly the best thing to do would be to just apply some heat before nursing Howie; then you're not going to get overproduction.

(As for the puddles, I just took to throwing towels down when I went to bed because it kept up for a few weeks.)

Ugh on the morning sickness - so sorry to hear it. Awesome news about the first day of daycare going well. (I hope somehow this means you get a nap out of the deal...)

― Sara R-C, Friday, 2 March 2007 16:54 (seventeen years ago) link

First day at daycare. Result: she has a cold. I'm gonna beat that kid who gave it to her UP. ;-)
She had her molars whilst battling this cold. Result: a very sleepless night for everyone involved.

― nathalie, Monday, 5 March 2007 06:37 (seventeen years ago) link

H had his 10-day check-up today and all's well - jaundice has cleared, he's got a lovely pink belly button where his stump was until two days ago, and he has put on nearly a pound in four days (!).

We also seem to have slipped into a half-decent sleeping routine whereby we start to get him ready for bed around midnight (when we're ready for bed ourselves), he falls asleep by 1, wakes at 4.30 for a quick feed and change then goes back to sleep til 7.30. This morning he even gave us an extra lie-in of an hour after his 7.30 feed. I am vaguely inclined to try to get him to bed earlier in the evening (since my friend told me her 6-week-old happily goes to bed at 7pm!) but am reluctant to mess with the current system as I feel very fortunate to be getting 6 hours' sleep a night at this point. Anyone got any thoughts on this?

― Meg Busset, Tuesday, 6 March 2007 15:20 (seventeen years ago) link

If you're getting some sleep with a newborn you are indeed fortunate! What a good boy!

― Beth Parker, Tuesday, 6 March 2007 15:33 (seventeen years ago) link

Congratulations new babies and new mums n dads!

Meg: as ppl said to me upthread when I asked a similar qn, count your blessings! Ours now (at 3 months)has a regular pattern of sleeping at 10PM, waking at 6 or 7 for a short feed, then back to sleep for another 2-3 hours, and then nothing during the day bar the odd 10-minute naplet. We don't really want to move him back earlier - I really like coming home and seeing and playing with him, and my wife likes the extra morning sleep.

He is at his second swimming lesson, or splashing lesson or whatever you call it.

It's fun how they seem to try and "level up" different skills at different times - two weeks ago it was all about intense concentration on his hands and accurately touching stuff in front of him, and he'd hardly pay our voices any attention, then this week he's working on locating sounds and depth perception and its starey stary head turney all the time with his hands politely by his sides. He also has developed a happy but ear-splitting squawk which is louder than his unhappy cry or howl.

― Groke, Tuesday, 6 March 2007 15:42 (seventeen years ago) link

When we build the new house, we'll probably get bunk beds. They like sharing space. They're pals; we're lucky.

Maria, one of my regrets in our other house was that we built it assuming that the boys would share a room. A room for each, no matter how small, is preferable, I think. Tucker ended up moving out of the shared bedroom—not because they weren't getting along, but because Nigel was so much sloppier than him. He moved into that tiny tower room, which had no door and was freezing in the winter. We were paying HUGE eliectric bills so that he could run a space heater.
Don't forget, they're going to still be there as young men—home from college, home on holidays with girlfriends, spending time there between rentals, if they end up staying on the Vineyard (it DOES happen!) etc. So even if they like sharing a room now, I strongly advise building a room for each—big enough for a double bed, a bureau and a bookcase. Maybe a chair. Anything else is wasted space. Check out our guest room—it has all of the above, and it's a bit smaller than 8 by 12, not counting the closet.

― Beth Parker, Tuesday, 6 March 2007 15:54 (seventeen years ago) link

Tallulah's sleeping pattern at the moment is very similar to Lytton's - and it's fine by me, as I love the easy engagement with her after work and after the trauma of putting Ava to bed.

She's much less active than Ava was at the same age (we have a pic on Flickr of Ava jamming her feet in her mouth post-bath at 14 weeks; Lulu* is now 17 weeks and the idea of her even being able to get those tree-trunk legs more than an inch off the floor is laughable) but I guess a lot of that is down to her being a much bigger baby (4lb 10oz at birth to 14lb in under four months) and her not getting as much interaction with Mum and Dad during the day. The wild'n'crazy 2-y-o does tend to demand all your attention.

(* - Pam's pet name for her and Ava's too, so I've just gone with it; very crafty by Pam, as Lulu was one of her favoured names that I nixed)

Lulu chuckles and yelps and coos but there are no discernable vowel sounds yet. She's much readier with a smile than her sister was; Ava would hold your gaze, seemingly fascinated, checking out your hair, your eyes, but Lulu just smiles and laughs every time you lock eyes with her. I doubt she'll be crawling at 7.5 months and walking at 10 like big sis.

Our evening routine with Ava has totally broken down for the moment but we're about to impose a new, better one. For the first 6-7 weeks after Xmas, everything was great - bath with Dad, brushy brush teeth and spit out the yuck (copyright Bing Bunny), singsong on the bed as I changed her into her pyjamas and then bed without a problem. No way is that working any more. However, the nursery (after 13 months!) is nearing completion and soon she'll be in her first proper bed, surrounded by her toys and books in a room of her own. I'm sure the transition will be hell for a few weeks but she's totally ready for the bed experience, I reckon.

Latest Ava crazes: singing everyone's name to the tune of Fireman Sam, counting to 20 but with the teens in a quasi-random order, blowing kisses.

― Michael Jones, Tuesday, 6 March 2007 16:02 (seventeen years ago) link

Shall I post pictures? It's been a couple of weeks...

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/159/409271311_7e49eae1ab.jpg

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/125/409271301_d086f01e35.jpg

― Michael Jones, Tuesday, 6 March 2007 16:11 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh wow, it's so fascinating reading about other babies' development, habits etc!

Alice currently goes to bed about 7.30-8pm (obligingly falling asleep almost immediately she clocks the combo of bedroom, swaddling, darkness, and soft music) and then doesn't wake until about 3am. She doesn't settle well after the 3am feed, but usually has another 3 or 4 hours sleep once she does. 7 hours + 4 hours is of course FANTASTIC, but we are trying to edge last feed/bedtime later so that her 7 hour stretch coincides a bit better with ours.

She's not a smiley baby by any stretch of the imagination, preferring a look of intense concentration/suspicion. But she will stare raptly at colours, lights and her hands for ages, and has started to really fight sleep during the day in favour of looking around her - unfortunately this soon makes her outrageously overtired and she screams madly until we can persuade her to sleep through intensive dummy-rocking-shushing sessions.

― Archel, Tuesday, 6 March 2007 16:24 (seventeen years ago) link

Skipping 1360 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

aw! What's her name?

― ENBB, Wednesday, 9 April 2008 22:28 (sixteen years ago) link

Veronica Rose (altho Ronnie is also acceptable, and Ronnie Rose also okay if she ever goes into full-on Southern Rawk mode)

― Shakey Mo Collier, Wednesday, 9 April 2008 22:32 (sixteen years ago) link

Cuet bebeh!

― Rock Hardy, Wednesday, 9 April 2008 22:48 (sixteen years ago) link

Aw!

We did have a part 3 parenting thread but it's become a bit neglected of late...

― Michael Jones, Wednesday, 9 April 2008 23:20 (sixteen years ago) link

Here's the new thread.

― schwantz, Thursday, 10 April 2008 02:21 (sixteen years ago) link

Good name - it was my grandmother's and is also my confirmation name.

― ENBB, Thursday, 10 April 2008 03:17 (sixteen years ago) link

five years pass...

effective parenting.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BgEQigEIUAAYLom.jpg

useful guidance.

― Daniel, Esq 2, Monday, 10 February 2014 01:17 (ten years ago) link

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