The new rolling ILX parenting thread, since the other one was getting unwieldy

Oh, those twins!

Ava has always played rough with her little sister, but last week she bit her:

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Here's the hellion trying to explain herself:

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Progress report - Tallulah still not able to sit unsupported, so she's a wee bit behind her sis on that score. Trying to crawl but no forward motion yet. She's up in the 60-odd percentile weight-wise but is the same flavour of shortstack as big sis - hugging that 9th-percentile (about 65cm at 29 weeks). They're both destined to be five-two in their socks if they're lucky.

Ava's sentence construction is still more or less stuck at the "May Ava have..." stage (the third person thing is very cute and we don't really want to discourage it!) but she's starting to identify words now. It's not reading, more a feat of memory, but she'll look at the label on a carton of cream and say "ice cream van" or an issue of ReadyMade and say "ready now!"; certain words crop up in her stories so she recognises "London" from her Madeline stories, "pesky" and "rat" from That Pesky Rat (though they both mean "that pesky rat") and so on. Also her own name, Lulu, Mummy, Daddy and so on. Still having trouble with lower-case letters.

While the in-laws have been staying we've all been in the same room which may be a step in the right direction as regards Ava and Lulu sharing space but is a step backwards in getting Ava to sleep through the night in her own bed (she invariably gets in with us around 3am). This summer: toilet training! Oh joy.

Nice mantlepiece, schwantz.

xxpost I bought such a chair for Ophelia. She didn't like it AT ALL and cried every time I put her in it. SHe doesn't like to be *restricted* at all.

FITE!
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Sleeping Owen:
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Ben sleeps on his stomach:
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IF ANY OCCASIONAL ILXORS HAVE RECENTLY LIKE IN THE LAST 24 HOURS SAY HAD A BABY NOW'S THE TIME TO POST ABOUT IT OKAY

He already sleeps on his tummy? Woha!

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walking with granny in yoyogi park.

yesterday she had, not really fever, but a higher temp. :-(

what on earth are those twinies hugging??

whats on O's t? a bunny?

poor beeps has an ear infection and a lot of congestion. a bunch of snot sucking, some frightening coughing fits and lots of "ARE YOU BREATHING?!?!?" from me. sigh.

nathalie -- i was only funning on the buddhism thread

MJ -- manga wants its eyes back

schwantz -- your twins are stupid cute, and i wish them all the best

sunny -- tell beeps i said "sup"

MJ -- manga wants its eyes back

Ha! If you don't mind, I may steal this next time I'm stuck for a caption on Flickr.

Poor Beeps. Howie had a bunged-up nose last night, I wondered if it might be hay fever 'cause he was rubbing his eyes too.

His sleep has gone completely tits-up the last week or so - whether it's teething, growth spurt, or the hot weather, who knows? But he woke up five times last night :(

On the plus side his eczema seems to be slowly improving with the help of steroid cream and lots and lots of emollients.

Also - he can now roll over onto his side, but then kind of gets stuck.

Ah yes, it's a bunny.

The other day, damn Japanese diapers, Ophelia was sitting beside me on the futon and SHAT all over it. Urgh!

She's doing ok though. Feels better and has added a few *mumblings* (words): Lucy, daddy, mommy, granny, grandfather... Yes, you have to know Ophelia's language to understand her but it's very clear for mommy. :-)

Alice now often rolls onto her stomach in her cot but has trouble rolling back and sometimes wakes us up crying to be moved :(
Night feeds have been well and truly banished though, hurrah!

Meanwhile, she can sit unsupported briefly, but far prefers standing up and will shout to be lifted to her feet if made to sit for too long. At this rate she will skip crawling altogether...

She has two teeth and dribbles constantly, and foodwise enjoys pear, apple, squash and potato (and will tolerate carrot) but unbelievably dislikes banana.

Has had the grumps for the past few days - heat and growth spurt I think. Must post this photo to remind myself that she's not always screaming!

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I am going to be a full-time stay-at-home Dad as from next Monday. I get to do toilet training. I suspect you might be hearing from me a bit more often.

Wow! Good luck.

Quite the opposite for me - I am going back to work as from next Monday and am already mourning being a stay-at-home mum :(

My Hubbin did the full-time dad thing for a while. I think. I know he did the stay-at-home male, but I can't remember if it was before or after Le Kidlet.

God, I'm losing what memory I had. Sheesh.

Late 93/early 94, after she'd started pre-K, so I could sit around in the mornings in my bathrobe and watch Oprah and scratch my balls.

Wait, I'm not supposed to talk about my balls on the parenting thread. Sorry.

balls make babies babies make parents?

re stay at home daddies: ive tried to talk pleasant plains into this lifestyle. no go.

I'm just too committed to screening sportstalk callers and playing this wastebasket game.

men these days. they want careers and babies. THEY WANT IT ALL

What I'd really like to do is open my own boutique.

What is up with men and balls? Jeez. ;D

ha

did sarah make it back from the UK?

One more week! She'll be home Monday.

xpost -- MY POKEMANS -- LET ME SHOW YOU THEM.

She'll be back soon, and with hundreds of photos and probably thousands of stories.

Truth? I miss her, even though she's having the adventure of her lifetime. I'll be glad when she gets home.

Mothers, tell me about quickening. When did it happen, what did it feel like.

i didnt get it but my mom claims she did when she was pregnant with me (but not with my brother). she describes it as feeling like the world just flipped over. a head rush kind of thing where you lose your balance and think youre going to pass out but then everything rights itself.

however, here in the US (as far as i can tell) it just refers to the baby moving which still feels pretty freakin weird.

hmm. . .I'm being a paranoid betty. At home awaits Zantac and a pregnancy test. One or the other should hopefully sovle the weird feeling I've been having the past couple of days.

Quickening is the moment you first feel the baby move, as far as I know?

It was like:

one day, in your head or to partner 'oh, that might have been baby! Or not. Could have been gas. But it might have been!'
a couple of days later 'oh, maybe that was it!'
a coule more days later 'maybe that was, or maybe not, I can't tell!'
a couple of weeks later 'ok, that definitely was the baby!'

It's really weird. You're totally on the look out for it, but at first it is very like gas turning over in your stomach, so it's easy to miss, until you know what you're looking out for.

Apparently you notice it much more with subsequent pregnancies, because you know what to look out for. When it starts can depend on a whole lot of things, like where the placenta is, whether you're sitting quietly or if you're on the go all the time. (you don't notice movement as much if you're always on the go)

I was 90% sure that I felt squirrel first at 18 weeks. It felt like brushes sweeping the top of my bump. I'd probably felt things before but put it down to gas. Chris felt squirrel kick for the first time when I was 21 weeks.

Yeah, that seems pretty far along. I've seemed to gain a lot of weight lately and have felt/looked bloated but even if I was surprise pregnant I'd think I'd be bigger.

The past couple of days I've been feeling sporadic fluttering near the top of stomach, under the sternum. No other adominbal distress normally associated with gas, etc. though.

Mrs O is back at work. We're not quite sure if it'll work out as there are three babies competing for two grans but so far (2 whole days!) it's working out okay.

Megan is crawling around and saying jajaja (which occasionally becomes Dada) and boooo/poooo. She's had to adopt two different crawling techniques as we have carpets upstairs (proper crawling) and wooden flooring (sniping coz it's slidy and fun) downstairs. Time to child proof the house again - I mentioned this to Mrs O and said something about Megan being able to grab my DVDs and video games and ended up mumbling an "oh yes, that too" on the whole falling down stairs thing.

She's had a couple of teeth for a while but doesn't seem to keen on growing any more of them.

I associate quickening with cutting an Immortal's head off so I'm not much use to Ms Mis here.

sam, either way its not something you feel until well into pregnancy.

i wouldnt have even realized beeps was moving if pp's mom hadnt casually mentioned that the first baby moves are just like little tap tap taps. i was expecting to be booted HARD. of course, that came later.

sam, how would you feel about being preggers?

pics please omino

why do you all get so much maternity leave. i was back to work after 6 weeks.

In the end, I would be pleased to be pregnant. It's in our future, not our present, but I'm sure we'd deal after the inital shock.

I will post pics later, when I get home.

why do you all get so much maternity leave. i was back to work after 6 weeks.

We've been on one wage for a few months. I think Mrs O got 6 months maternity pay (which was much less than her salary, obv) then the rest was unpaid.

Even though it's been ages, I remember that weird fluttery "what-was-that?!?" moment when I first felt my daughter move - it was around the 16 week mark. I was being very still and quiet, and there was a frantic butterfly feeling in my gut that bowled me over. I don't remember the same thing with my son, but I was less likely to have any still, quiet times then.

Because we have a good welfare state. The statutory minimum is:

you are legally entitled to take up to 12 months off. You get the first 6 weeks at 90% pay, then for the rest of 9 months you get about £112 a week, and if you want to take the last three months it's unpaid. (it used to be 6 months, but it changed to 9 months statutory maternity pay after 1st April)

Some people have very generous employers. I get 6 months on full pay, then I'll get the £112 a week for the next three months.

We are very lucky compared to the US. I think Canada have similarly mum friendly policies.

crazy

I'm guessing some of you saw this, but in case you didn't:

<a href=So Then...Does Anyone in London Need a Nanny?;So, Then...Does Anyone In London Need a Nanny?</a>

Even if you can't help me out, I need to spread the word...thanks!

BABY DATA DUMP! Lytton has just been weaned - zero hassle, likes every food we've given him, seems to want stronger and stronger flavours, adapted to spoons with ease - he doesn't like water though and has no patience with beakers.

He's sitting up for a few seconds at a time but not raising himself - trying to crawl but not managing it, good at wriggling/rolling round playpen until he encounters an interesting toy, though. Huge caws of excitement and satisfaction when "THAT'S NOT MY ROBOT" appears - bigger books annoy him. No longer putting stuff in his mouth as soon as he sees it. Huge big-eyed interest in the outdoors.

Sleep time remains stubbornly fixed at 9-10pm, sometimes later. Two teeth, one seemingly coming (judging by drool and howls) but can't work out where. Totally recognises his name and will look around for source - ignores "Hello", sometimes answers to "Gibbon" or "Sausage" (am trying to phase these endearments out). Definite mirror stage action going on. Shy with other people for about an hour then very playful (just as other babies are getting tired!). That's it! I love this thread by the way and reading about all your kids, I just never have anything specific to say.

x-posts

One year sounds very nice but how does a company justify paying someone on maternity leave for even 6 months? i mean, you dont need six months off. seems kind of excessive.

I guess it's all part of recognising that if companies don't have mum friendly policies then they're going to lose key staff. Also that my company used to be part of the civil service, which historically has always been ridiculously generous to staff.

Childcare in the uk is incredibly expensive, particularly for very young children, and often oversubscribed, it often puts women off going back to work. I'm on a ttc/mums board that has an international mix of women, and it sounds like some US moms really struggle going back to work as early as they have to.

Yeah it sounds like you've become well-acclimated to the US Sunny! We only get 6 weeks which I think is probably too little.

I think that six weeks seems like way too little. I really want to be able to stay home for a couple of years when my kids are young but am terrified that we won't be able to afford for me to do so. If we wait until we can afford it, I'll be ancient before we can realistically contemplate having kids. Hopefully we'll be back in the UK when we have or first so I'll be able to take more time off. Maternity leave here in the States is a joke.

6 weeks is plenty of time for you to be physically ok to work (im assuming retail and or office situations here). I probably could have gone back in a week. As for the kiddo, its good to bond but Id think the earlier you socialize them the better. I get scared thinking of beeps believing we're her whole world.

6 weeks felt too soon after my first, so I stayed home (w/o pay) for 8 months. I ended up with some agoraphobia made worse by our living situation at the time (trailer park, no car, scary neighborhood), so returning to work would have been better for me. I leapt back to work at the 6 week mark after my son was born, which was better all around for us. The situation varies so much - I had a better support network as a working mom than as a stay-at-home mom, but it's different for everyone.

Tom, apparently most babies get their teeth in the same order although the timing can be hugely variable. So, bottom two middle ones first, then top two middle, then the rest.

My six months maternity leave is now up! (I was a bit early to qualify for the nine months boo.) My employer is reasonably generous but I certainly can't afford to take the option of further unpaid leave - and Matt would kill me anyway. He can't wait to share looking after Alice. NO WAY was I ready to go back after 6 weeks, but I guess if that had been my expectation all along I would have been...

J. went back to work at 6 weeks, but the daycare was next door to her workplace, so she walked over a couple of times a day to visit & de-stress. A perfect situation.

As for the kiddo, its good to bond but Id think the earlier you socialize them the better. I get scared thinking of beeps believing we're her whole world.

This was pretty much our thinking as well. What really scares me is people who have kids for emotionally needy reasons. For a while, the kids are going to be like, "oh shit, these people are my whole world!" And then suddenly one day they're going to be like "oh shit, these people aren't my whole world, but they made me think they were!" (/rant)

so its your fault shes independent enough to go off to london with out mom and dad!

what are signs of teething? beeps has started drooling like a faucet and shoving everything in her mouth to suck/chew on. and shes lost interest in pacifiers. it has to be her hand or a towel (bib/receiving cloth/shirt/blanket/towel) or toy. shes only 3 months though.