teh rolling craigslist funney thread

http://losangeles.craigslist.org/lac/tlg/4929392815.html

bassist bass player (L.A.)

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los angeles >central LA >gigs >talent gigs
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compensation: 100,000 year

http://images.craigslist.org/00M0M_iUqcmIwzysX_600x450.jpg

Hello Folks,

We are looking for a bass player. One who isn't named Blake and doesn't drive a 2002 Blue Volvo XC70 and constantly inform you that it's the safest car in the world and that it looks good for his joint custody hearing. A guy who doesn't act like an @$$ Hole when he meets your girlfriend by trying to get her phone number as you went to get him another beer (yeah B she told me, thanks). One who doesn't take an upper decker at your parents' house on easter sunday, and then blames it on your grandma. A bass player who doesn't get the band kicked out of the Sizzlers on Highland by cornering the waitress in the hallway and telling her, "your booty is why god invented my balls". Someone who has never worn a terry cloth sun-visor upside down, to the side, and went by his initials B.R.O. until he got the manager position at work, and then started power-tripping. Specifically on those of us who use to smoke him out in Terry's Acura at the Ralph's on western.

PLEASE: No stolen equipment brought to rehearsals, what you do on your own time should not cost a fellow band member (who was just dropping you off on his way home) a night in the back of a police car.

Once you come out to a rehearsal you'll see who we are and all will be made right in the universe

If these stipulations don't apply to you please contact us.
do NOT contact me with unsolicited services or offers
post id: 4929392815 posted: 6 days ago

^ totally wants Blake back in the band

Wanted- 3M to return to communicating.

3M is using and endless shape memory alloy belt on an extruder or
calender line. If this infringes on patent #6024907 it isn't authorized.
The following history the CEO has been made aware of. Names of individuals
(P. I. s) that infringed on patentee's rights in the last score years will soon
be published. This was a waste of stock holder money. Was taxpayer money wasted?

In May of 1974 patentee, recovered from a nervous breakdown 2 years
early, proposed a design using an endless belt. The design was based on old
patents such as #2849752 of 1958 which were mentioned at the following meeting.
This meeting , originally scheduled for the 3M Center, was changed by 3M to the
Holiday Inn in St. Paul for the afternoon of May 22, 1974. Patentee left the meeting
after a stranger walked into the room and adjusted the curtains and left. 3M's answer
to this meeting is attached. No design drawings were every sent to 3M although requested.

Extra Large custom exotic art already framed