I am having a great time organizing my wedding, so it's not categorically horrible. I hope I'm not jinxing myself.
― Textured Vegetable Personalities (get bent), Friday, 27 March 2015 07:20 (nine years ago) link
Stay strong tho!
yay jody i am glad to hear it!
i think i'm just behind? and i made the mistake of going to a happy hour thrown by wedding vendors last night and freaked out about all i have to do. (my students keep asking me how the wedding planning's going and i'm like what wedding planning???)
i am bad at organizing things. and i feel like, though i love my venue, it's kind of schmancy, so that has ratcheted up expectation levels all around. two nights ago we had our wedding tasting with the caterer (that was awesome, tbf) and our caterer lady was like, what are your wedding colors? and i was like, do i really need wedding colors? and she was aghast.
it will be okay. i need to get a photographer and a florist.
― horseshoe, Friday, 27 March 2015 09:32 (nine years ago) link
weddings are so weird
Wedding industry people make me want to begin some kind of cull on heteronormative, matchy-matchy people.
― camp event (suzy), Friday, 27 March 2015 09:49 (nine years ago) link
None of this shit will matter on the day, just enjoy it.
― Matt DC, Friday, 27 March 2015 11:35 (nine years ago) link
"wedding colors" was a pretty laughable concept ime, unless you have some particularly heavy decorating thing going on it's basically to make sure that your table linens don't clash with your flower arrangements.
― call all destroyer, Friday, 27 March 2015 12:36 (nine years ago) link
YOU DO NOT NEED WEDDING COLORS
― Guayaquil (eephus!), Friday, 27 March 2015 12:39 (nine years ago) link
also, from the very first post here:
"i don't want to feel like i'm trying to please them with a day that's supposed to be exactly what we want."
I think is part of the problem. A wedding is NOT supposed to be a day that's exactly what you want. It's a party you're throwing for your guests. It's when you put a lot of weight on it being "exactly what you want" or "perfect" or "expressive of ourselves" that it starts to get really stressful. If you're married at the end of the night, the thing was a success.
― Guayaquil (eephus!), Friday, 27 March 2015 12:41 (nine years ago) link
OK maybe I should have read more of the thread and noticed that I already made this exact comment 18 months ago
― Guayaquil (eephus!), Friday, 27 March 2015 12:42 (nine years ago) link
I'm old and have been married a long time, we forget things
We went into ours going "book church, book venue with good food, no more than 50 guests, book some way for them to get from A to B, buy rings and wedding clothes, book photographer, get some friends to play music and that's it". Eventually if family members feel particularly strongly about eg flowers they'll offer to deal with it themselves because they have literally nothing else to organise or pay for. It worked pretty well and we ended up with a considerably less minimal wedding but without having to deal with that sort of oppressive scope-creep.
― Matt DC, Friday, 27 March 2015 12:43 (nine years ago) link
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-uxiEg34jwHQ/Tp6lFDBUuuI/AAAAAAAAL4c/g1z_czNPmIg/s640/RogerAndMe_074Pyxurz.jpg
― Orson Wellies (in orbit), Friday, 27 March 2015 12:45 (nine years ago) link
a happy hour thrown by wedding vendors last night
Child, you realize that's the belly of the beast, right? It's their J.O.B. to make you feel horrible. HARRIBLE!
Shake it off, c'mon, you got this.
― Orson Wellies (in orbit), Friday, 27 March 2015 12:46 (nine years ago) link
p. sure we had no 'wedding colors'
is yr event in b'more? i can attest that dangerously delicious pies make a fine alternative to cake
― mookieproof, Friday, 27 March 2015 12:56 (nine years ago) link
Marriage is a big deal.
A wedding is not a big deal.
Unless you want your wedding to be a big deal, in which case that is a choice and not an imperative.
Basically eephus OTM.
― mom tossed in kimchee (quincie), Friday, 27 March 2015 13:08 (nine years ago) link
my wedding colors are "fuck" and "you"
orbit otm, wedding vendors are insane. avoid as much as possible, stick with normcore crowd & you'll be fine. they're like 90% of the problem
― difficult-difficult lemon-difficult (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 27 March 2015 14:10 (nine years ago) link
If I could do it again, I'd elope to Vegas, for real.
― just1n3, Friday, 27 March 2015 14:35 (nine years ago) link
Let us know when you get your engagement photos in.
― pplains, Friday, 27 March 2015 20:17 (nine years ago) link
Leaning towards the "haunted castle" venue option at the moment
http://i.imgur.com/Vhspf2e.jpg
― who epitomises beta better than (ShariVari), Sunday, 28 June 2015 17:01 (eight years ago) link
hot tip of the day: avoid holding an outdoor wedding anywhere that armed drones are patrolling.
― Aimless, Sunday, 28 June 2015 17:09 (eight years ago) link
xpost wait sharivari are u getting married? :D congrats!
― difficult-difficult lemon-difficult (VegemiteGrrl), Sunday, 28 June 2015 17:43 (eight years ago) link
Thanks! Got engaged ages ago but have been very slow to do anything about it.
― who epitomises beta better than (ShariVari), Sunday, 28 June 2015 17:44 (eight years ago) link
no shame in a long engagement :)
― difficult-difficult lemon-difficult (VegemiteGrrl), Sunday, 28 June 2015 17:45 (eight years ago) link
congrats sharivari!
http://visittoukraine.com/uploads/images/sights/lastochkino-gnezdo2.jpg
― drash, Sunday, 28 June 2015 18:18 (eight years ago) link
currently watching Don't Tell the Bride where they go to Thorpe Park. They may have a haunted castle there?
― kinder, Sunday, 28 June 2015 18:59 (eight years ago) link
The on-the-door entry fee at Thorpe Park is actually more expensive per-head than the all-inclusive package we've been offered at Kinnitty Castle, pictured above.
Ireland looks like great place to get hitched at the moment.
― who epitomises beta better than (ShariVari), Sunday, 28 June 2015 19:07 (eight years ago) link
yah but that's before you factor in your ilx invitations
― rahrah avis (imago), Sunday, 28 June 2015 19:11 (eight years ago) link
tbf, i did not invite an ilxor to mine, but mine ended <2 years later, so there's yer warning
but it does matter, because women end up bearing the brunt of the responsibility for anything that goes wrong on the day -- of course guys think it's unimportant, they're not the ones who are getting told CONSTANTLY how important it is and what a shitty, cheap, thoughtless person and bad friend/relative you are if one thing's out of place.
― A Smedley Adoption (get bent), Sunday, 28 June 2015 19:22 (eight years ago) link
and there's a certain luxury that comes with saying "so what, just ignore them." sorry, i can't.
― A Smedley Adoption (get bent), Sunday, 28 June 2015 19:24 (eight years ago) link
getting told CONSTANTLY how important it is and what a shitty, cheap, thoughtless person and bad friend/relative you are if one thing's out of place.
good lord. my family and in-laws aren't like that at all, thankfully. I know this is never to be taken for granted and I am very lucky that way. you have my sympathies.
btw, simple things are harder to screw up. the more of a huge production it is, the easier it is for things to go wrong.
― Aimless, Sunday, 28 June 2015 19:40 (eight years ago) link
ur already a bad husband sharivari grats
― irl lol (darraghmac), Sunday, 28 June 2015 20:56 (eight years ago) link
Got my wedding in 3 weeks. ilxor count: 1.
― woof, Monday, 29 June 2015 11:40 (eight years ago) link
that's not counting me
― woof, Monday, 29 June 2015 11:41 (eight years ago) link
(& congratulations sharivari!)
you left the strawboys out last I heard can u pls confirm the latest
― irl lol (darraghmac), Monday, 29 June 2015 16:51 (eight years ago) link
the bride's not biting It was going ok till she saw the pictures:(
― woof, Monday, 29 June 2015 21:38 (eight years ago) link
surely it's a job for strawmen not strawboys
― 2 jazz boys 1 jazz cup (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 30 June 2015 05:25 (eight years ago) link
made that pun in UK ilx thread like six hours ago smh
― irl lol (darraghmac), Tuesday, 30 June 2015 05:50 (eight years ago) link
eh, mine was better
― 2 jazz boys 1 jazz cup (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 30 June 2015 05:55 (eight years ago) link
blowin u a strawberry rn
― irl lol (darraghmac), Tuesday, 30 June 2015 05:56 (eight years ago) link
It's ok, Darragh - i'll have double strawboys at mine to make up for it.
― who epitomises beta better than (ShariVari), Tuesday, 30 June 2015 06:53 (eight years ago) link
Congrats Sharivari.
Why not try a basic setup? Some bread and cheese and fine white wine.
― bureau belfast model (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 30 June 2015 07:22 (eight years ago) link
Oh I never really posted about this.
We away and married late last year after eleven years together. Civil ceremony, two witnesses and nobody else. Drinks, lunch, change clothes, taxi, plane, few phonecalls, social media post of 'hi everyone we got married see ye in a week'. Went like a charm tbh.
We had anticipated problems with one of her parents in particular, her choice was to let them know only a few weeks in advance that we were doing it that way. On her lead, we dropped it fairly brutally on them in person and then after a few excruciating minutes we jogged on our way, being advised en route not to darken door again for a while.
Radio silence apart from a few proxy attempts early on through her brother to do it properly - mass, decent notice period, big bash with all relatives and neighbours and what have you. Other than that no parental contact for her for a few months, not til well after the deed was done in fact.
Everyone else was thrilled for us, so all in all it wasn't a bad effort. I recommend. Any questions?
― Betsy DeVos Ayes (darraghmac), Tuesday, 14 February 2017 23:18 (seven years ago) link