I just left my girlfriend

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aw did you break up with her for yanc3y aaron?!

― geeta (geeta), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 04:09 (twenty years ago) link

you just did this so you can secure your lead in the basketball league!!

― rob geary (rgeary), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 04:11 (twenty years ago) link

Wow, it really is like my relationship... where's the love?

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 04:13 (twenty years ago) link

you missed it. look for yesterday's "mildly kinky" thread.

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 04:16 (twenty years ago) link

don't if you value whatever remains of your faith in the world

― strongo hulkington's ghost (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 04:23 (twenty years ago) link

yeah right. as if living in ann arbor and detroit will leave one with any of that.

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 04:30 (twenty years ago) link

aaron w you know it's all love. maybe you shouldn't resist the temptation to look up an ex. you know, maybe it's time to be friends again! or whatever. dude, it's more time for records.

― rob geary (rgeary), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 04:31 (twenty years ago) link

grow a beard!!

― rob geary (rgeary), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 04:34 (twenty years ago) link

dude! yeah! beard & records!

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 04:36 (twenty years ago) link

aka how to keep potential future girlfriends at arm's length until your emotional recovery is complete

― rob geary (rgeary), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 04:37 (twenty years ago) link

no offense meant to beard-wearers or beardophiles

― rob geary (rgeary), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 04:38 (twenty years ago) link

Man, I wish I could grow a beard... mine comes in so gross and patchy... although I guess that would succeed in keeping away the ex's. But agreed about records. Scott 4 (the album, not that crappy band) is currently getting a lot of play.

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 04:50 (twenty years ago) link

you should grow a beard anyway! nay, you are compelled to grow it precisely because it will be sucky. (there's always the chance it won't be which means everybody wins.) but not to get too hirsute and tangential here are some other breakup-consolation prizes you should award yourself:

cigars and/or liquor
bath (pref with one of the above)
meat
duh, videogames
general slovenliness

enjoy!

― rob geary (rgeary), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 08:48 (twenty years ago) link

aaron you totally need to hear the new dwight yoakam single, it's all about this

― cinniblount (James Blount), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 08:51 (twenty years ago) link

OH SHIZZLE blount reminded me

bluegrass

― rob geary (rgeary), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 08:52 (twenty years ago) link

(alone or in conjunction with all the above)

― rob geary (rgeary), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 08:52 (twenty years ago) link

HI DERE

― Amazing Randy (Amazing Randy), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 10:15 (twenty years ago) link

good move. the only thing i like better than people breaking up is if someone dies.

― duane, Wednesday, 5 November 2003 12:01 (twenty years ago) link

ps I am still with my girlfriend and we're getting on fine.

― dog latin (dog latin), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 12:32 (twenty years ago) link

Way to go, Aaron. Staying in a bad relationship is D U M B. And I wouldn't hold back the urge for a rebound. Sometimes those can blossom into something more.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 14:23 (twenty years ago) link

atta boy, aaron
you've freed yourself

― dyson (dyson), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 14:47 (twenty years ago) link

''no offense meant to beard-wearers''

none taken.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 14:52 (twenty years ago) link

like rob said, it's probably better to avoid exes and focus on records to avoid futher complications.
i hope you're taking comfort in the fact that you are not doing one of the dumbest things ever: moving away towards the end of a fizzling relationship but not breaking it off. end result: furtive affairs, tense phone calls, and weekend visits that result in vase-hurling throwdowns.

― lauren (laurenp), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 15:43 (twenty years ago) link

It is probably for the best, Aaron. At least when you move you can make a totally fresh break.

― Nicolars (Nicole), Wednesday, 5 November 2003 15:45 (twenty years ago) link

Aw well thanks everyone. I'm trying to grow a beard, and am learning the joys of Tony Hawk 4 thank you. Tonight I saw the semi-ex -- it's in that nebulous nether-region at the moment. I think we're gonna take a break while I'm away and then see about restarting once she moves as well. Which, yeah, is way better than pining and cheating and all the rest. And I guess it gives me license to slut-dom. Or something.

Gonna check out the new Dwight Yoakam single as well.

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Thursday, 6 November 2003 07:02 (twenty years ago) link

Aaron,

My serious advice: Stick to THPS4, THUG is not worth your money. Learn the art of the revert to manual, it will treat you will in the end.

Yours,
gygax!

― gygax! (gygax!), Thursday, 6 November 2003 07:24 (twenty years ago) link

Are those R. Kelly albums??

― rob geary (rgeary), Thursday, 6 November 2003 08:02 (twenty years ago) link

oh nevermind they're videogames. good lookin' out aaron!

― rob geary (rgeary), Thursday, 6 November 2003 08:03 (twenty years ago) link

three months pass...

Hi, back again (I'm afraid). We split up again on Valentine's Day and it's starting to properly dawn on me now. It was quite a mutual agreement, we still love each other a lot but we were arguing at least once every week about basically the same things so we decided to call it a day. And now I'm alone and so is she and neither of us like it one bit. We've spoken a lot since, there's been tears and we've been taking it in turns to comfort each other - it feels a bit pathetic as this is not really the official behaviour for a recently split pair.
So now I'm at home feeling sad and listening to Pet Sounds, wondering if this was the right thing for us and trying not to look at cards, gifts, photos from the last year. Gonna look back over this thread and read all the nice things you guys said the last time round.

― dog latin (dog latin), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 02:39 (twenty years ago) link

they say that time is a great healer and it is sad and shit but true.

― RJG (RJG), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 02:42 (twenty years ago) link

Yes, I'm at that cynical stage where I don't want to believe it for some reason. It's like a masochistic will not to want to let go.

― dog latin (dog latin), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 02:50 (twenty years ago) link

pet sounds will help.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 03:30 (twenty years ago) link

so will die hard.

― RJG (RJG), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 03:33 (twenty years ago) link

totally, though i'd avoid die harder and esp. die hardest.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 03:44 (twenty years ago) link

dont watch all the real girls or comtempt, its for the best.

― todd swiss (eliti), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 05:44 (twenty years ago) link

try not to listen to sad records. bad, bad idea.

― mandee, Tuesday, 17 February 2004 05:47 (twenty years ago) link

see, when that kind of stuff happens, sad music sometimes helps. its better than happy love music like "wouldnt it be nice." the sad music relates to you and i have found that it helps me out of ruts much quicker than happy music

― todd swiss (eliti), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 05:54 (twenty years ago) link

And do not watch any porn!

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 06:45 (twenty years ago) link

Come on, theres never a bad time to watch porn!

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 06:49 (twenty years ago) link

What are those 'same things' you keep arguing about every week? Are they really things that are impossible to resolve or compromise on?

― C J (C J), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 09:57 (twenty years ago) link

"It's not always true that time heals all wounds
There are wounds that you don't wanna heal
the memories of something really good
something truly real, that you never found again"

― Jerry the Nipper (Jerrynipper), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 10:10 (twenty years ago) link

Obliquely, it goes like this: - She doesn't really enjoy drinking, smoking or taking any drugs whereas I can be a bit of a bon viveur at the best of times lets say. This wasn't helped by the fact that all her friends have left for university and left her behind. So every weekend I'd say, "come out to the pub with me, it's the weekend, I'd enjoy your company and my friends really like you" and she'd say "no, I'd rather stay in and watch telly with you as I have a limited interest in your friends and I don't fancy drinking", but then I'd feel like I was being kept indoors if we stayed in and she'd just get bored if we went out.
The only times we got along was when we were alone together either at a restaurant or cinema but if there was an external influence to this, it would cause conflict.
She really wanted to go travelling, or at least go on holiday with me but it was something I couldn't commit to. As a graduate with a £2000 overdraft and a low-paying job I really couldn't make any promises about spending money on holidays I couldn't afford. Besides I have got more things to think about (moving out of my dad's place, learning to drive etc) than travelling. I suggested she go away with a friend but all her friends are at uni, and besides she wanted to go with me.
More than anything I think it was our situations that got in the way. My dad wouldn't let her sleep over and her mum is completely nuts and would burst into her room without warning so we hardly any time to, well you know - it was always a rush job and eventually we practically gave up on doing it.
I think if a few of her friends were around she wouldn't have acted so dependently towards me, and if I wasn't so damn broke all the time, I'd be more willing to think about being able to take her places she wanted to go. As it is, I was earning nothing so trying to save up was futile.
Basically I think we weren't good enough companions for each other. We were great lovers, agreed on music and films, even spoke in cute little languages etc, but we weren't friends. I needed someone who could let her hair down and party with me and she needed someone with bigger ambitions than wanting to go to the pub on a friday.

― dog latin (dog latin), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 10:17 (twenty years ago) link

By the sounds of it, you have made the right decision. It is never an easy one make & i'm sure it sucks for you both. It will get easier in time.

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 10:31 (twenty years ago) link

the going out and travel thing makes you sound like me and that sounds like my idea of hell. you made the right decision.

― the surface noise (electricsound), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 10:33 (twenty years ago) link

I just left my boyfriend last night, and I'm swinging back and forth between feeling completely sick and weak and feeling completely numb and dead inside. :-(

― regular posting anonymously, Tuesday, 17 February 2004 11:07 (twenty years ago) link

jim, which one makes makes me sound like you?

rpa, yup, that's exactly how i'm feeling. remember, feel free to email me off board if you need some mutual sympathy

― dog latin (dog latin), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 11:11 (twenty years ago) link

RPA - I hope you are ok.

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 11:15 (twenty years ago) link

ps my REAL email address: dog_latin@DELETETHISBIThotmail.com

― dog latin (dog latin), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 11:18 (twenty years ago) link

jim, which one makes makes me sound like you?

i like to go out and i can't afford to travel, so i understand where you're at..

― the surface noise (electricsound), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 11:27 (twenty years ago) link

sorry to hear that RPA :(

― stevem (blueski), Tuesday, 17 February 2004 11:34 (twenty years ago) link

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