Mid-Life Crisis

Slightly freaked by all these ILXors apparently falling apart. So far, I've always had the happy knack of being much healthier than I feel or, more to the point perhaps, look. Whenever I've had medicals/ blood tests etc, I'm not sure who is more surprised by the results, me or the medical fraternity. I'm delighted my mother's genes have won out over my father's genes (or however that works) as there's, on average, a 20 year gap in life expectancy between the two sides of the family.

My midlife crisis was awesome (quit job, went back to school in order to do a 180 degree career change, packed up a truck with spouse and cats and kicked around different places for a year, ate a lot of tasty food all over the place). I am looking to having another midlife crisis in approximately five to seven years, when I'll be upwards of 46.

The midlife crisis would not have been awesome had it not coincided with my spouse's midlife crisis and we wanted to do the same things i.e. quit jobs, piss off.

is getting tattoos at 33 crisis-y?

i know i'm still young(-ish) but i think about this stuff a lot (and identify with what other people have said about both feeling young and ancient simultaneously). i'm generally very happy with my life so thoughts like "is this what it is for the foreseeable future? am i really not going to live in another city, or be in a different relationship?" are not unpleasant, just a little bittersweet.

turning 30 came with a back injury that may never be fully healed, so it's been a character-building thing to accept it and be happy that i can generally do everything i want to do without pain (just not run like i used to or play sports, which i didn't do anyway). and daily exercise is super essential for general well-being, yeah.

pretty much all of the excitement and novelty in my life comes from making & releasing music, and it's been interesting to collaborate with much younger people at the same time that my friends stopped going to shows (at least to anything that goes past 11pm). while the music thing has been better than ever, for some reason it's hard to picture myself doing the same thing at 45 or 50 (but also hard to imagine stopping).

and speaking of friends, as some good friends have moved away and others have circled back, it's hit me really deeply how important it is to have those friends nearby and to keep up the relationships. also that it's really nice to have friends who are not trying to have kids.

nah

It has to be out of character for the person, there are no universals.

Just today a boomer perv in a SUV stared at me getting down to Ramble Tamble in my own car for so long he missed his light & mistook my pointing at the light for ? Maybe he was lost in his postmidlife crisis of laying down the male gaze where it's not welcome.

There really should be classes for boomers to relearn how to drive as they age, also instruction on not skeeving out others

It was pretty shocking in a lol type of way. I only know he was staring bc I turned my head and he gave me this Don Henley head nod and I was like the light's green you moran

What a world that guy must live in!

omg Don Henley head nod

I feel like there is a broieness in boomers/gen x'ers in chicagoland that does not exist in all cities

or at least, not to that extent

i have no idea but that loser got on my last nerve

there's a sort of contentedness that midwestern boomer dudes have that is very specific and singular. it's this sort of "I am the incumbent mayor of life" manner you get from certain types as they rumble around the streets of Schaumburg.

Ramble Tamble is the bomb

This shit just won't go away. When do I reach a point of wizened, content old age and cease to be a frustrated middle aged dude?

idk, when you find out, let us know plz

The main 'life lesson' that you learn as you get older is "you can't get one-up on life" - i.e. you don't ever arrive at a fixed position where you can say I now have a stable and content frame of mind from which now onwards I'll deal with life. Everything changes over time.

(/Aimless mode)

totally got one-upon life atm but I'm very wary of the other boot dropping any day now

I thought I was done with my midlife crisis two and a half years ago but noooooooooo. Same midlife, different crisis.

crisES, even

commiserating w/u, q!

i would say it's good to find a way to know yourself physically, via exercise, rest, yoga etc. bodily feelings aren't explained enough. if you are doing the same things looking for a change then maybe reconsider - ime you can't instantly change thoughts etc but you can really change your physical reaction to all these. also if problems seem quite deep you need to start very small to fix them.

realise this sounds faintly sci*ntologist but i am honestly trying to help.

200 dollars buys a higher plateau

my midlife challenge appears to be learning to give less of a fuck about the vast majority of things and more of a fuck about a few key things. Easier said than done, as it turns out.

The main 'life lesson' that you learn as you get older is "you can't get one-up on life" - i.e. you don't ever arrive at a fixed position where you can say I now have a stable and content frame of mind from which now onwards I'll deal with life. Everything changes over time.

This is OTM. All through my twenties I had some notion that I would finally arrive; that there'd be some point in my life where I'd have everything all worked out and there'd be some blissful karmic balance in everything I'd achieved in relation to where I'd be. But that's not how life works and in a way, I wouldn't want it to be.

i turn 50 in two months. What I find striking is just how ephemeral and elusive "life" - in whatever way you want to interpret it with whatever philosophical tools you prefer - actually is. You'll never have it all worked out because it's all a moving target. Stay static for too long and eventually you'll notice that the world around you will turn into something you're not used to.