'and for you?'

i hate rehearsed waitstaff spiels so much. i understand that it's easy but if you're doing one like i heard today that branched off from "have you been here before?" with an unabridged tour of appetizers, entrees and drinks which is v chili's imo i'm going to judge you, though i definitely won't make a point of it or under-tip. hard to begrudge the wispy burner youth with shooting star earrings her upsale dollars but damn if it isn't grating. tbh i often have earbuds in while eating lonely table-for-one meals so i can ignore other peoples' conversations and waitstaff interactions and just focus on comfort eating. this post is 6 / 10 on sadness scale.

sounds like you could use some chicken tenders

https://www.guernicamag.com/daily/helen-rosner-on-chicken-tenders/

"And then we have my porchetta with mashed sweet potatoes," "next up is my ricotta gnocchi," stuff like that.

such weird creepy grammar
first person singular identification of employee with workplace, like waiter in the flesh before you is instantiation of borg

xp i had mint chocolate newman o cookies instead, a whole package of them, but i definitely appreciate that article.

that chicken tenders article is great; it's a food without a history but it has really clear and strong associations for people. it also gets at something that's an open secret among a lot of cooks and chefs and food critics: that very often when they get off work, cheffy food is exactly what they *don't* want. they want salty, greasy, simple stuff that isn't cerebral or imbued with zen balance or whatevs.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1wJz9slJKV8

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"how bout a ..."

PROVED RONG BY SCIENCE, SIS

"gimme some of that..."

this is like every language learning tape. yo quisiera.... i always say can i get. i don't know why. i always feel weird when waitstaff say they "will be taking care of" me.

maybe this is a PNWism bc i don't see anyone else complaining about it, but i really hate "i'll do a ..." which i often hear when people are ordering drinks. "what can i get you?" -- "i'll do a pbr" or whatever.

"I will dine on your..."

"Shovel _____ into my maw"

Or please shovel if I'm feeling nice

"do you do...(x)?"

"right um I'd um could I um the steak please um if that's ok"

Think I make a distinction between special items, and standards, like, "I'll have the soup," but "I'll have a salad."

"what do you have by way of a.... starter?"

when waitstaff say they "will be taking care of" me

translation: give me any shit and you will end up dismembered in a trashbag in the alley

'table 6? they've been taken care of'

maybe this is a PNWism bc i don't see anyone else complaining about it, but i really hate "i'll do a ..." which i often hear when people are ordering drinks. "what can i get you?" -- "i'll do a pbr" or whatever.

― Clay, Tuesday, July 14, 2015 2:15 AM (16 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

could be? i started hearing it a lot once i got out of the pnw and into the sw. wanted to ask them what cave they just got out of

i find 'i'll do a...' or 'lemme get a...' grating