Say something nice about the South

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Some cajun food is OK, but keep the crawfish away from me. They're insects that live in the mud. Horrible nasty little vermin that actually *taste* like mud if you don't season them right. Sometimes you bite into one to find that it still has mud in it. Oh horrible, most horrible.

And gumbo? This is not cuisine. This is what prisoners and exiles found in the swamp they'd been banished to. Oh, look, okra! Bleeeargh.

I kill you, Kenan :)

Actually, lots of gumbo isn't made with okra. I know that's where the word comes from, but that's sort of like the old-fashioned gumbo. It's fallen out of fashion. I'm not crazy about it myself, most of the time.

(They weren't prisoners and exiles so much as misled landless nobility.)

Crawfish are just lobster! It sounds like you've had them mis-prepared or fished from the wrong places.

Tep (ktepi), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:04 (twenty years ago) link

HAha! beat horace to it!

Kingfish (Kingfish), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:04 (twenty years ago) link

Could be. But I've had a lot of them.

Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:05 (twenty years ago) link

(x-post)

Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:05 (twenty years ago) link

Well, excuse me, Kenan. Dickhead.

Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:05 (twenty years ago) link

(They weren't prisoners and exiles so much as misled landless nobility.)

Either way, they were there because other people didn't want them around. Which is American as hell, and I'm all for it. No value judgement there. It's just... swamp food. Icky poo.

Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:07 (twenty years ago) link

Ally, that was not an attack on you.

Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:07 (twenty years ago) link

I'm way off topic anyway. This is the "say something nice" thread. Sorry.

Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:08 (twenty years ago) link

(They weren't prisoners and exiles so much as misled landless nobility.)

Either way, they were there because other people didn't want them around. Which is American as hell, and I'm all for it. No value judgement there. It's just... swamp food. Icky poo.

I actually realized as soon as I hit submit that I was talking more about New Orleans, and you were talking more about Acadiana. Habitual lapse for me.

Turning this around: there is a cultural appreciation for the underdog stemming from numerous unrelated reasons (and therefore affecting even those people who reject one reason or another).

Tep (ktepi), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:11 (twenty years ago) link

The friendliness needs to be underscored. I feel claustrophobic even when I visit the rural-suburban northeast, because that friendliness is just plain not there. It isn't an objective better/worse thing cause it's all about comfort levels, but for me, that alone almost seals it.

Fresh local produce for the majority, if not entirety, of the year.

Hurricanes get names. Ever heard of a blizzard with a name? No. You know why? Cause they suck.

Tep (ktepi), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:15 (twenty years ago) link

Something nice (to repent for my sins):

Most of the rest of the local Southern specialties are fantastic. Barbecue, for one. Soul food in general -- mashed potatoes, black-eyed peas, chicken fried steak, sweet cornbread, green beans. These are a few of my favorite things.

Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:17 (twenty years ago) link

I heard of some African American group recently complaining that hurricanes never get ethnic names, just white people names. Like a hurricane is a thing devoutly to be wish'd, or something. I think we should name hurricanes after tyrants and despots, personally.

Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:19 (twenty years ago) link


Pecan pralines

Manatees.

The Banjo.

Waffle house

ModJ, Monday, 18 August 2003 17:21 (twenty years ago) link

Note to self: must kill Kingfish (or possibly read threads more thoroughly before posting, whichever's more time-efficient)

Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:21 (twenty years ago) link

They're deliberately multi-ethnic! Although lacking in African American names. Maybe multi-national is a better term.

I'll second chicken-fried steak. I remember the first time I ordered it -- in New Hampshire -- with no idea what to expect. A battered T-Bone? A steak which had somehow been wrapped in chicken? Was it just a fancy term for a chicken breast? The answer was so much better than I could have hoped.

Tep (ktepi), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:22 (twenty years ago) link

Jazz.

Tep (ktepi), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:23 (twenty years ago) link

Blues. The crossroads.

Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:24 (twenty years ago) link

Although New York and Sweet Home Chicago has as much to with the modern forms of all that music as the South does. But we did it first, that's for sure.

Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:26 (twenty years ago) link

Neither Texas nor Florida are Southern, nope.

gygax! (gygax!), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:27 (twenty years ago) link

not even East Texas, nope.

gygax! (gygax!), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:28 (twenty years ago) link

Muscle Shoals.

Kingfish (Kingfish), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:28 (twenty years ago) link

Yeah, normally I don't like to emphasize "did it first" much, but it works for this thread :) And Louis Armstrong is good no matter what came after him.

Tep (ktepi), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:28 (twenty years ago) link

the South treated this ragged road-trippin ex-blue-headed boy just fine. except New Orleans. New Orleans held up a sign saying "What are you thinkin', boy?".

donut bitch (donut), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:32 (twenty years ago) link

I'll be the first to admit, on behalf of my town, that New Orleans is not a particularly good place to visit.

Hm, let me think about the rest of the South, though. Oh! Good for road trips. Road trips in or through the South are the best. You don't have the urban sprawl of so much of the North, and you don't have the featureless homogeneity of so much of the Midwest.

Tep (ktepi), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:35 (twenty years ago) link

I am scared of Louisiana.

NA (Nick A.), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:35 (twenty years ago) link

It's more scared of you...

ModJ, Monday, 18 August 2003 17:40 (twenty years ago) link

Tep, it was circumstances though. I was alone. My car was my life blood, and obviously filled to the rim with "I'm road tripping" shit. I had just driven straight from Athens, GA earlier that day. I agree Nawlins ain't a good place to visit with that setup. However, if i went with friends, and had little to worry about in the form of immediate possessions, I'd be just fine.. i think.

I liked the rest of southern Louisiana though.. aside from the maelstrom of nutria roadkill everywhere. I stopped in Rayne (Frog Capital Of The World) for a little. I actually had to call some guy for a job interview that day! It was really bizarre.

donut bitch (donut), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:40 (twenty years ago) link

Actually, the only not-nice thing about the South other than that from my trip was Chapel Hill, NC. Man, boring-ass place.

donut bitch (donut), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:42 (twenty years ago) link

Pralines, dudes. Seriously. Order some and see. Especially you Limeys out there.

ModJ, Monday, 18 August 2003 17:43 (twenty years ago) link

New Orleans can be good if you know people there. Weirdly enough, it's not very geared for tourists. It's a paradox I haven't been able to work out.

Nick, why on earth would you be scared of it?!

I stopped in Rayne (Frog Capital Of The World) for a little.

Oh my God. That's honestly my favorite place in the world. Did you go to the truckstop (it's very visible) with the boudin balls?

Tep (ktepi), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:47 (twenty years ago) link

Various fruits.

Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:47 (twenty years ago) link

And yes, yes, yes pralines. Oh my.

Also, the citrus fruit and strawberries will put you off their lesser regional equivalents for life. (Might not apply if you live in California.)

Tep (ktepi), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:47 (twenty years ago) link

...and many interesting furry animals.

ModJ, Monday, 18 August 2003 17:48 (twenty years ago) link

Sarah lived in Shreveport for a while and has told me stories. Stories that involve crazy men with snakes and crack houses.

NA (Nick A.), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:49 (twenty years ago) link

http://www.repamerica.org/fl/manatee.jpg

ModJ, Monday, 18 August 2003 17:49 (twenty years ago) link

All the nuts roll down to Florida. I'm from NC, raise up. It's okay, but I'm pretty tired of it.

Jeff-PTTL (Jeff), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:49 (twenty years ago) link

New Orleans has the most spectacular cemetery I've ever seen.

Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:49 (twenty years ago) link

The Smoky Mountains are purdy.
Is Asheville part of them? Either way, it's a beautiful area.

oops (Oops), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:50 (twenty years ago) link

see the lovely lakes.

Kingfish (Kingfish), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:52 (twenty years ago) link

Dollywood!!!!!!!

Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:52 (twenty years ago) link

My dad was born there (the South, not Dollywood)

rosemary (rosemary), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:54 (twenty years ago) link

I wish I was born in Dollywood.

Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:54 (twenty years ago) link

Sarah lived in Shreveport for a while and has told me stories. Stories that involve crazy men with snakes and crack houses.

Oh, well, Shreveport. Yeah, I'm not gonna argue with that :)

Tep (ktepi), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:55 (twenty years ago) link

Lizards! I don't know to what extent this is a mostly Gulf Coast thing. But everywhere I lived in LA, I had a lizard nearby.

Tep (ktepi), Monday, 18 August 2003 17:57 (twenty years ago) link

Manatees! I love the manatees.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 18 August 2003 18:06 (twenty years ago) link

Isn't that exclusively a Florida Atlantic-side thing? Or do they live in the Gulf?

Kenan Hebert (kenan), Monday, 18 August 2003 18:09 (twenty years ago) link

Manatees are animals that always look either confused or jolly, depenging on how YOU feel.

ModJ, Monday, 18 August 2003 18:11 (twenty years ago) link

They look like they should get big ol' hugs.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 18 August 2003 18:13 (twenty years ago) link

Sad Days for Mermaids of the Sequined Sort
By ABBY GOODNOUGH

WEEKI WACHEE, Fla., Aug. 7 — Barbara Wynns has never stopped thinking about the days she spent in an enormous water tank here, somersaulting and backflipping in a sequined tail fin while sucking air from a rubber hose. It was the late 1960's, when young women from as far away as Tokyo auditioned for the privilege of being a mermaid at Weeki Wachee Springs, doing shows for half a million people a year.

These days, the mermaids at this aging water park are locals who are tired of waitressing and retail jobs, and their celebrity does not extend much past Hernando County, all scrub pine and suburban sprawl on Florida's west coast. Attendance at Weeki Wachee has dwindled, and the park has a long list of problems, not least an excess of algae in the mermaid tank.

"It's sad," said Mrs. Wynns, 54 and dainty, who quells her nostalgia by filling her home with hundreds of mermaid figurines and passes out business cards with a tiny portrait of her mermaid self, circa 1968. "To me, this 27-acre park is a universe that I love more than breathing. But not everybody gets it anymore."

The troubles became a crisis in June, when the park's landlord threatened to end its lease if it did not fix dilapidated structures, add fire exits and resolve sewage problems and a possible termite infestation.

The absentee owners, a group of investors, had put off repairs while trying for more than a year to sell Weeki Wachee Springs, one of the last and best-known of the kitschy theme-park dinosaurs that ruled Florida in the decades before Walt Disney World. The bad news for Weeki Wachee arrived just months after another faded roadside attraction, Cypress Gardens, closed abruptly after 67 years.

But just when it looked as if the mermaids were going to have to hang up their Lycra tails forever, the owners proposed a last-ditch plan: why not donate the park to the City of Weeki Wachee, which has nine residents and not much to concern itself with except the park's well-being? Mayor Robyn Anderson, a former mermaid who is the park's no-nonsense general manager, was gung-ho.

"If anybody should have it, it's the city," said Ms. Anderson, 29, flipping her long blond ponytail as rain bombarded the roof of her office and the few visitors wandering the grounds ran for cover. "The people who live and work here actually know this place and would keep an eye on it better than people who are never around."

The deal was completed last week; now all the city has to do is pay a $112,500 rent installment by Aug. 30 and make a few crucial repairs by later this week. The payment can be made in time, Ms. Anderson said, but maybe not the repairs. That could mean more trouble with the landlord, the Southwest Florida Water Management District, known as Swiftmud.

"We could move to terminate the lease if the deadlines aren't met," said Michael Molligan, the communications program director of Swiftmud.

The show, meanwhile, goes on, even on rainy days like this one, when a mere 20 people await the morning's performance in an amphitheater that smells of mildew.

http://graphics7.nytimes.com/images/2003/08/11/national/12merm2_184.jpg It is taxing work: the mermaids have to stay in the 72-degree spring water for up to 45 minutes, holding their breath between swigs on strategically placed air hoses. For the last eight years they have performed "The Little Mermaid" — the original Hans Christian Andersen version, not the one that has helped make that other, bigger theme park in Orlando so rich. They experimented with a Pocahontas show a few years ago, but ditched it — audiences were crestfallen at losing Ariel, Ms. Anderson said.

The spring is a phenomenon in its own right — it pumps out over 100 million gallons of crystal-clear water a day and feeds it into the adjoining Weeki Wachee River, which flows into the Gulf of Mexico. It is the springhead that forms the mermaid tank; the rest of the spring snakes far underground, and the bottom has never been found.

Aware that water is a precious commodity in Florida, the city of Weeki Wachee recently sued to get possession of a local water utility that it feared might someday tap into the spring, another potential bad ending for the park.

In several months of training, new mermaids learn CPR, then become certified scuba divers before trying the peculiar art of hose-breathing. Newton Perry, a Navy diver who built the underground theater and opened the mermaid park in 1947, invented the technique. The breathing hoses scattered around the tank have buttons to adjust the air pressure — if it comes out too hard, it can bruise lungs. Mermaids bite down to stop the flow of air, and slowly exhale through their noses while sashaying to numbers like "I've Got the World by the Tail."

http://graphics7.nytimes.com/images/2003/08/11/national/12merm_184.jpgMs. Anderson is blunt about the job's many demands.

"You're in a tail, 16 feet under water, breathing on a hose," she said. "If you think about it too much you can freak out."

Mermaids occasionally have panic attacks, when they suddenly feel claustrophobic or breathless and rush to the surface. New performers face nasty ailments like ear and sinus infections as their bodies adjust. There is also the issue of creatures from the Weeki Wachee River invading the mermaid tank.

"Yesterday we had a manatee in here the whole time," said Sativa Smith, who does sound, lighting and stage direction for each performance from a tiny control booth next to the tank. "We get otters, gators, three kinds of turtles."

Once, a large alligator swam unseen into a hole under the amphitheater and popped out while a mermaid was in the tank cleaning the glass, Ms. Smith said. The mermaid quit. Now, technicians do a "water check" before every show, and if an alligator longer than four feet shows up, they cancel. Manatees are welcome, however — they like to visit when the mermaids are cleaning the tank with sponges, to get their backs scratched.

Mayor Anderson, who oversees mermaid auditions, said a lot of women have shown up for tryouts with no idea of what it takes. Many "aren't very good swimmers, believe it or not," she said. The perfect candidate can endure the chilly water, lip-sync, hold her breath for up to two minutes and swim with a smile — but no diving mask — without scrunching up her face. She will also perform happily, without seeing her adoring audience, for pay that starts at $6.50 an hour.

This morning, four women who fit the bill swam out from behind a curtain of bubbles that shot from the bottom of the tank when Ms. Smith flipped a switch in the control room. They were a few minutes into their act when Ms. Smith saw a flash of lightning, then another. The phone in the control room rang; it was Ms. Anderson, who had also seen the bolts. Ms. Smith turned on the loudspeaker in the tank, which the audience cannot hear, and ordered the mermaids out.

They disappeared into "the tube," a narrow shaft to "the hot room," a hidden, heated platform where mermaids huddle between scenes in towels and bathrobes.

Ms. Anderson said she had already made some of the repairs that Swiftmud requested — shoring up rotting beams at the Mermaid Gallery restaurant, for example — but she is holding off on others: the county fire marshal told her the mermaid theater had enough fire exits, she said, and she does not want to connect the park's sewage system to the county's until the busy season ends.

The city plans to ask Swiftmud if part of the lease payments can go to repairs. "We have to help each other out here," Ms. Anderson said. But she and other park devotees are also coming up with ideas for generating income. Ms. Anderson wants to expand the kiddie pool at the Buccaneer Bay water park that earns Weeki Wachee most of its money, and perhaps create a second mermaid show, with new costumes and choreography.

Ms. Wynns, the former mermaid, believes Weeki Wachee can go even further: why not put on bathing-suit fashion shows in the mermaid tank, bus tourists the 88 miles from Disney World, even have a mermaid circulate through the park, like Mickey, Minnie and Goofy?

Among other things, Ms. Wynns would like to see the algae — "scrunge" to the mermaids — removed.

"We had silky white sand and emerald eelgrass, and when the bubbles stood on it they looked like diamonds," she said wistfully. "I believe we can make this place magic again, with the right money."

Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Monday, 18 August 2003 18:28 (twenty years ago) link

Tep, I don't think I stopped at the Rayne truck stop, but I did go to the casino and walk through the frog restaurant. I had to do my phone job interview in the parking lot there. It was also a really beautiful day.

donut bitch (donut), Monday, 18 August 2003 18:32 (twenty years ago) link


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