Real England

the dangling collection box is a charming detail

https://youtu.be/ESwrwS6Uxlw

re: bullseye, I could do without the sneery captions but there are some excellent photos here

http://bullseyecontestants.tumblr.com/

(sadly no sign of cravat guy afaict)

Dying

The shortest amount of time anyone has ever owned an electric blanket

http://bullseyecontestants.tumblr.com/post/132867752668/two-in-a-bed-redux-the-shortest-amount-of-time

The shortest amount of time anyone has ever owned a trouser press

http://bullseyecontestants.tumblr.com/post/9759803983/bullys-prize-board-the-shortest-amount-of-time

There needs to be a Tumblr like that for Blankety Blank.

https://greatrednorth.files.wordpress.com/2010/12/onions.jpg

I've half-seriously considered setting up a Blockbusters contestants tumblr, but it seems like too much effort

Homes Under The Hammer slumlords might be a possibility?

I have always wanted to see a show on Challenge culled of clips of awkward small-talk at the start of gameshows, with commentary from someone like Graham Norton when he was still on Channel 4 or Harry Hill.

http://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2016/feb/29/groom-criticises-stag-weekenders-ryanair-midair-brawl-causes-flight-diversion

The man standing is heard to say: “I’m not afraid of you, I swear on my mother’s life. You’ve done it now. Why shouldn’t I batter you in the face? I would rather stab you in the face with a fork. No disrespect to you, but I hate you.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XRgE-a_plUE

Having paid out over £8,000 in removal and storage costs plus four years of alleged licence arrears to recover his boat, Leigh Ravenscroft's hopes his claim will show that CaRT was acting beyond its powers in seizing it and demanding back payment of licence fees.

Mr Ravenscroft claims that the boat, Grandma Molly (previously named Three Wise Monkeys) was moored over water and against land where CaRT have no jurisdiction. Furthermore, for most of the four years when it did not have a licence it was not owned by him.

LEIGH Ravenscroft, 39, of Moor Lane, East Stoke, has been found guilty of having no insurance for a Mercedes in Upper Parliament Street, Nottingham, on January 11. His case will be listed at Mansfield Magistrates' Court on January 14.

Pet owners living near a Nottinghamshire village are being warned to be on their guard after a large owl escaped.
Sammy, a female European eagle owl, has a 6ft (1.8m) wingspan and is usually fed on day-old chicks. Owner Lee Ravenscroft, of East Stoke near Newark, said the bird of prey will hunt foxes and rabbits in the wild, but might also resort to cats or dogs.

Mr Ravenscroft said: "Sammy is about two-and-a-half foot tall with a six-foot wingspan. Big bird.
"She'll be looking for foxes, rabbits, things like that. The danger is if she goes into a village where people are walking their dogs, that's what I'm concerned about.

https://www.mixcloud.com/leighravenscroft/

Or the likes of Mark Haining, Neelu Berry, Justyna Rzeska and Leigh Ravenscroft, who chased an innocent elderly lady (whom they’d stupidly mistaken for the school’s headmistress) down the street, shouting “Why are you laughing?”, “Stop killing babies”, “We don’t want Satanists on this planet” and “They won’t be here for much longer” (a clear death threat)?

Oh god, that Hampstead satanist thing is a rabbit hole of pure madness.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CdBRYyqXIAADntT.jpg

http://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2016/mar/08/police-investigate-spate-of-cyclists-being-pushed-into-london-canals

There was a fair of bit of prolonged police activity outside my house on Friday, it turns out this local thug called Wayne has been arrested for attempted murder in the local Asda. He went for someone with a knife, causing "serious throat injuries". It is quite disturbing really because I have had an argument with him once but thankfully it didn't go beyond unpleasant verbals. It got me thinking how preposterous my kind of bullshit bravado self image is sometimes, like I tell myself I don't take any shit off anybody, when in fact I am probably a prime candidate for "taking shit" but have been mostly riding my luck so far.

https://twitter.com/RightWingBio

http://www.itv.com/news/wales/2016-03-29/soldiers-jailed-for-beating-up-disabled-teenagers-in-brutal-attack/

Attack in Wales, one of the heroes squaddies from Scotland, but yeah.

"Our boys" gave them a bell of a beating.

that's what young people need today, a bit of discipline

big mistake spotty cannon fodder made was not being in the cabinet amirite

http://www.leicesterfantv.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/12/Carl-Muggleton-Driving.jpg

West Heslerton: Entire village goes up for sale for £20m

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-york-north-yorkshire-35958871?SThisFB

'I don't care that I'm guilty. I'm not bothered mate. I love it mate.'

Det Ch Insp Matt Walker, of North Yorkshire Police, said: "We knew we hit the jackpot when we investigated these lemons."

what a prick

icona pop early draft xp

lol, I missed that bit (xp)

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/butlins-apologises-after-race-hate-wrestling-show-for-kids-at-holiday-camp_uk_5703b6a4e4b069ef5c00d9f7?icid=maing-grid7%257Cukt2%257Cdl1%257Csec3_lnk6%2526pLid%253D446699

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CbLRfayWIAA_BgE.jpg

While walking back from town this morning I saw someone come out of a newsagents and get into their car, which reminded me of this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dm6OVMzImrc
From 1993 but actually less old fashioned than I remember it, at least until the voiceover starts.

one of the bleakest things i've ever seen

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6KwCY7AFyc0

hey it's ATP

Not fair on Pontins, at least they have a pool and a slide :p

today my colleague's kids were alarmed and confused by the latest bit of Trafford centre hyperreality http://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/recap-watch-what-would-happen-11308126

Update: Police chief apologises after 'suicide bomber' shouted 'Allahu Akbar' during Trafford Centre training exercise

:D

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k2PQP0pm3z0

thought we hadn't seen M______ M_______ for a while

Police officers 'used helicopter camera to spy on people having sex'

holy shit at that pontins clip, the manager creep at the end

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h45QxmmZbMY

Low hanging fruit but two shirtless men have shut down the Newcastle metro system by climbing on to a bridge and unfurling a bed sheet with "hang all peodo's" painted on it.

can u confirm that spelling

well I can

http://i1.chroniclelive.co.uk/incoming/article11315928.ece/ALTERNATES/s615b/JS89541795.jpg

That appears to be written with poo.

I seem to remember some idiots vandalising a paediatrician's house some years back.

https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/13151463_460327847501207_3202896431876666846_n.jpg?oh=55e720a80b983a1fd400be6cdb02b8c6&oe=57A0C95E

Can confirm from my litter-picking experience that peedos, peodos, etc function to allow various people who've been in prison for various stuff to agree on a shared bogeyman/common enemy

For example if you shot out the windows on your girlfriend's car because she was going on facebook, the peodo is still worse than you. If you discover that you're talking to someone else from a rival postcode at least you can agree that peodos are the real problem and need killing