Il Douché and His Discontents: The 2016 Primary Voting Thread, Part 4

ok maybe a little artistic license on the second half

So Clinton has a slogan now--an answer song, like "Sweet Home Alabama." It's already kind of annoying.

Cruz officially projected for Texas now (no surprise).

Virginia loss for Rubio not horrible since they're a proportionate delegate and not winner take all (but still a blow to his widdle ego)

sanders speech earlier sounded like they believed the race was over

clinton speech sounds like they read closely this

http://www.democracycorps.com/attachments/article/1025/Dcor_RPP_Memo_2.29.2016_FOR%20RELEASE.pdf

which, if any, will be the first state rubio wins? hawaii?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n0e2jN2D7Kg

Minnesota, maybe.

Lol rubio cant win a single fucking state

every time cnn puts up their key race alert thing i just think

MAJOR KEY ALERT

they don't want you to take this to the convention

"ted cruz is having his victory party at the redneck country club.. that's the name of it, don't get mad at me for saying it"

Cruz wins Oklahoma! The wave begins!

Oh Hillary, I'm really trying with you, but ... "we're all in this together" is such an obvious Sanders rip-off. Couldn't you at least have reworded a little bit? "All for one, one for all" maybe? "El pueblo unido jamas sera vencido"? "No one can stop us now, tonight we're on the loose"?

That Jon King line was pretty funny--tomorrow he'll claim never to have heard of the Redneck Country Club.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P9BfvPjsXXw

Sanders getting clobbered in Alabama

the whole south. annihilated.

gotta say, clinton used the party machine to her advantage in texas. all the local pols were in full force as surrogates.

that's what a party is for after all

i knowwww

"We were annihilated, George, we were annihilated."

xp oh no I didn't mean to be belittling D:

s'okay silby

there was definitely some grassroots bernie support in san antonio, but i never got the impression that they got much done. this was a less persistent bunch than the obama campaign 8 years ago.

it's worrisome just how conventional Hillary's rhetorical devices are. This wouldn't normally be a large concern, but this year...

Bison, bro, who has the time. South by is in less than a fortnight homes.

Clinton pulling away in MA now

Keeping my fingers crossed for Bernie in Minn

Rick Scott endorsing Trump tonight according to Fox News.

"Tonight is the beginning of Donald Trump bringing the people of our nation together"--Christie.

Absolutely. We're even feeling the imminent togetherness up in Canada.

lol

Is there anything more nauseating than watching Chris Christie play caddy for Donald Trump?

http://gawker.com/your-guide-to-americas-super-tuesday-national-meltdown-1762259739

"Apparently, Carson is saying he’s going to refuse to drop out of the race even if he doesn’t win any states tonight, saying “he’ll listen only to God and his supporters” since “the mainstream media is seeking to silence him.” All in all, a great prank by God."

Keeping my fingers crossed for Bernie in Minn
― Crazy Eddie & Jesus the Kid (Raymond Cummings), Tuesday, March 1, 2016 8:32 PM (7 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Anecdotal but friends saying Minneapolis neighborhood caucuses are packed, insane lines, running out of actual ballots & using pieces of paper

Wow, Trump sticking the knife into Rubio tonight. That's amazing--not from Trump, but trying to imagine that before Trump.

which, if any, will be the first state rubio wins? hawaii?

― mookieproof, Tuesday, March 1, 2016 6:04 PM (36 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

nah i'm betting we go for trump.

I remember Huckabee staying in long after he'd been mathematically eliminated, saying "I didn't major in math, I majored in miracles."

Rubio: "Do not give into the fear, do not give into anger. Do not give into sham artists and con artists who try to take advantage of your suffering, your hardships."
going for the old "not the robots you're looking for" ploy

are there Mexicans in Hawaii

Even though Cruz is winning Texas, it looks like Rubio may win Austin. Who knew?

can't wait to see who in the GOP falls in the Trump conga line and who rails against his apostasy til the very end

God, this press conference and Christie's face in the backgrounds

God, this press conference and Christie's face in the background

Clinton pulling away in MA now

My sense is that, unless Sanders did really well in Worcester, the state is probably hers?

I doubt that anyone who falls into the conga line will look more painfully diminished than Christie does right now.

Goo, this ass conference and Christie's face in the background

Trump will be our next President. Listening to his press conference, it's like music. Pure poetry.

God, this press conference and Christie's face in the backgrounds

God, this press conference and Christie's face in the backgrounding

Trump says he'll get along with Paul Ryan, and, "if I don't, he's gonna have to pay a big price, O.K.?"

politics as wrestling bloodsport is amazing and weird and terrifying and hysterical

Christie is a Machiavellian genius. He's not going to be governor for much longer. So now he'll either be Vice President (or goebbels or whatever) if trump wins, or rewarded with some bank making business bullshit role if he loses

trump says absolutely nothing except empty slogans and shit talk. its amazing.