Rolling Worst Music of 2016 - Making That Meghan Trainor Money

lol, this is currently #7 on the itunes chart:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=duXnGGGjKlA

http://www.famousbirthdays.com/people/jacob-sartorius.html

Jacob Sartorius Popularity

# 4
Most Popular Person

# 1
Instagram Star

# 1
13 Year Old

it's typical Ark Music Factory shit, except he already has legions of adoring (unironic) fans, and the inevitable backlash (like this reaction video, which got 1.5 million views in two days) is only going to drive his own subscriptions/views counts. I doubt anyone involved in its creation believes it's a good song, but that's beside the point — 3 minutes of white noise with this kid's name attached to it would have produced an identical reaction.

('vanity singles by internet stars' would be a good thread concept, but I can't think of that many)

haha, look up 5quad

lol, I love how half the audience knows every word of this song and the other half only knows the 5-second clip they heard on vine/'musical.ly'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lEWz6MTNhXs

"Fucked Over" deleted from Youtube? Is nothing sacred

https://soundcloud.com/770rd/fucked-over-prod-ducko-mcfli

The fact that someone called Jacob Sartorius had a song titled "Sweatshirt" sounded very promising, until I heard it. It's a hand-me-down of a hand-me-down. He can still regain some important musical cred if he names all of his songs after garments, in increasing order of intimacy when he's reached a more mature age. (That's probably the plan.) On a less relevant note, why did Vevo allow the song to be remixed by a coked-up Noel Gallagher? Really makes that embed painful.

haha, look up 5quad

It's, it's like Michael Jackson on a budget
https://youtu.be/cMnbZ4AU60k

http://www.npr.org/2016/04/20/475025719/sister-sparrow-the-dirty-birds-tiny-desk-concert

lol holy shit

He can still regain some important musical cred if he names all of his songs after garments, in increasing order of intimacy when he's reached a more mature age. (That's probably the plan.)

Jacob Sartorialist

did you see this video though?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cMTAUr3Nm6I

my ears say no, my eyes say no.

Sounds like she's downplaying her hat voice and trying for a more basic pop voice.

sounds like 2000

Yeah, very good point. It's still retro/flashback, down to the silver trench coat.

silver trench coats were a thing?

I can't think of any off the top of my head, but if you went back in time dressed like that no one would notice.

Oh, here we go.
http://photos1.blogger.com/img/39/2594/1024/missy.1.jpg

Ugh

two years in a row for meghan winning the poll, huh

'No' isn't at all original or inspired, and her voice is still annoying, but it's still significantly less annoying than her previous work - a 3/10 rather than a 0/10, and there is a lot of other 3/10 stuff out there.

Xp: obviously she's still making some of the worst music, but you may have stacked the deck by showcasing her in the thread title.

she is an axiom of bad music.

her new single "me too" makes "no" look like a masterpiece

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vVFwuq44UTQ

Oh wow. Where'd you find that?

lmao

something something RHCP something gamergate something

recommended for this thread by ilxors on facebook:
Spraygun War (featuring Joshua Todd and Stevie D of Buckcherry) - "OMG"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GWXCNVlYbbE

it's not very good.

that's more sad than bad (though it's very bad).

twenty one pilots are awful

― maura, Monday, February 15, 2016 3:11 PM (3 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Despite the Stressed Out song, I went back to listen to their album this morning because I was reading an old Hayley Williams interview where she mentioned them briefly. I made it about 30 seconds into the opening track.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hts6PzULHSY

why do i not hate Stressed Out as much as everyone else

Because your name isn't Blurryface and you don't care what we think?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ahwQhkvMFuI

well that was annoying.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SjfspM5sDIA

I'd never heard of the Avalanches before this week. Was their last album a steaming pile like that?

Their last album (which was released in 2000) was just boring rather than actively bad.

Self-described redneck metal band Hellyeah (one ex-member of Pantera, one ex-member of Mudvayne, some other schmucks) covering Phil Collins:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MMMrMhuxqg4

Wow, today has been a fertile day for the Rolling Worst thread! One of those guys lives in my neighborhood.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ZlbahhoEIo

0:48 - anus in our lyric videos now?

The irritating thing about that Beck song is that I almost like it

Throwing Shade garbage song got posted already fwiw

The irritating thing about that Beck song is that I almost like it

So true.

the video's not doing it any favors

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ypPSrRYOAj4

I don't have a YouTube embed, and it's not a single or anything, but the Kirk Hammett/James Hetfield version of "The Star-Spangled Banner" I just watched (Game 4 of the Stanley Cup playoffs) definitely deserves memorialization here.

is that "boomerang" thing one of those "friday" things where a talentless teenager's parents pay some dudes a few thousand bucks to create a simulation of a pop song and video?

that was my assumption (well either that or "snapchat star takes a wild stab at popstardom"), but she's actually a Dance Moms star, and "Boomerang" originally aired on that show. I'm sure it was professionally produced even though it looks/sounds like it was thrown together by scumbags over the course of a weekend.

seems less awful than generic, tho i had to bail after the first chorus

it's a bit better than those sort of child star vanity singles usually are but that's not saying much

I don't have a YouTube embed, and it's not a single or anything, but the Kirk Hammett/James Hetfield version of "The Star-Spangled Banner" I just watched (Game 4 of the Stanley Cup playoffs) definitely deserves memorialization here.

― Don Van Gorp, midwest regional VP, marketing (誤訳侮辱), Monday, June 6, 2016 8:26 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Here ya go, but it's positively beautiful compared to Flea's attempt last month.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tn-vFVik6Q4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8itum6etNcM