The articulate Vice President Joe Biden thread

like since Super Tuesday

https://twitter.com/VP/status/761253705341480962

Onion Biden and real Biden are now one

http://deadsp.in/wtdIBTU

“’Because I’m a billionaire I can do things other people can’t.’ What a disgusting assertion for anyone to make,” Biden said while campaigning for Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton in Pennsylvania. “The press always ask me, don’t I wish I was debating him? No, I wish we were in high school, and I could take him behind the gym. That’s what I wish."

Onion Biden and real Biden are now one

http://deadsp.in/wtdIBTU

― Ned Raggett, Thursday, October 20, 2016 3:37 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol this was EXACTLY what I came in this thread to post with EXACTLY the same sentiment

But there's also this Joe Biden

https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/bidens-last-stand-convincing-democrats-not-to-give-up-on-the-white-working-class-voters-fueling-trump/2016/10/21/d4230d4a-7a94-11e6-ac8e-cf8e0dd91dc7_story.html

As his motorcade barreled into a high-dollar fundraiser in this wealthy St. Louis suburb recently, Vice President Biden noticed the firehouse next door. He told his aides to cut the fundraiser short a few minutes so that he and the Democrat running for Senate here could visit with the firefighters on the way out. These were his people, and for more than 10 minutes Biden talked to the fire company about what they do and how members of his own family had been saved by their work.

“Hey, I’ve used you guys several times, and it was great,” Biden told the crew, according to Clayton Fire Chief Mark Thorp. The fire crew was stunned by the gesture, Thorp said. “He just as easily could’ve gotten in his car and waved.”

Meanwhile: http://www.politico.com/story/2016/10/clinton-biden-secretary-of-state-230428

Neither Clinton, nor her aides have yet told Biden. According to the source, they’re strategizing about how to make the approach to the vice president

Guys, let's try to keep this between just us and Politico, okay? Oh, I can't wait to see the look on Joe's face when she springs the news!

I'm sure Jill will let the cat out of the bag before it's time.

As the State Dept becomes less powerful in relation to Defense, maybe affability and a 150 watt smile are roughly the right tools for the job. But the main talent HRC might be thinking about here may be his loyalty. He'd never go behind her back to slag her off to journalists because of an internal power struggle.

Plus another four years of Onion Biden stories, only this time with datelines from around the world

My LOL of the week:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hjx-1gE9J7U

https://scontent-sjc2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/15171309_1126455830737269_7256971130739091606_n.jpg?oh=2a416a871f2878cb69c77147e7ec6060&oe=58C7F437

https://cdn-images-1.medium.com/max/2000/1*wXcs7rUo0i93g4oTqi8cxA.jpeg

from

https://medium.com/@WhiteHouse/behind-the-lens-2016-year-in-photographs-9e2c8733bbb3#.n48snl9n8

Beyond all of the most obvious awfulness of the next four years, I keep being reminded that we won't be seeing anyone from the executive branch just acting like a normal fucking human being who interacts with other human beings normally. Spray Trump with a super soaker and he'll just tweet about how sad and disrespectful that eight-year-old was.

...and Pence would sponsor the kid for electroshock.

well, yeah

The water stain on Pence's shirt would be the image of Christ. Amen.

and really, SuperSoaker optics are really important, like FLOTUS singing in James Corden's car

Someone on Reddit: Obama should resign a few days early just so Joe gets to be the 45th President for the next week.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C14U6VpXAAIwQK-.jpg

change we can believe in

It'll be on Snopes in five .. four ..

Zombies and Moustaches and Biden

http://www.npr.org/2017/01/12/509545778/in-surprise-send-off-president-obama-awards-biden-presidential-medal-of-freedom

you beautiful old bastard you

@DennisThePerrin
Only a decaying imperialist culture could venerate Joe Biden. There are no take backs.

@mrsinisterlefty
Come on, the man gifted Clarence Thomas to America. He deserves thanks from a grateful nation.

Godspeed to you and to Dennis in your search for the politician whose unimpeachable purity will lead us all into a new golden age filled with joy and prosperity and only the finest of linens and marble columns of such fine craftsmanship that to behold them is to weep.

notice how Morbs isn't quoting Charles Pierce (who was appropriately nuanced) this time.

what are some good biden portmanteaus and morbsian wordplays

joe lie-den

joe corporate buyden

those aren't very good though

glad yer down w/ Clarence, Old Lunch

(and presumably credit-card-co whoredom)

shove "purity" where bad improv goes

Your career?

I'd prefer it if Morbs took out a list of previous Medal of Freedom winners and told us how many deaths they caused

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/01/19/us/politics/joe-biden-delaware.html

So the quiet life that the Bidens lived away from their official duties in Washington, and the weekend rituals that were a large part of it, will continue. On Saturday that means taking Natalie and Hunter to the Charcoal Pit restaurant, where Mr. Biden will almost certainly order his usual meal of hamburger, French fries and milk shake that he has been gobbling down for decades, according to Juan Avilez, a cook at the Charcoal Pit who has been making that meal for Mr. Biden for 26 years.

“His all-time favorite is the black-and-white,” a vanilla milkshake mixed with chocolate syrup, Mr. Avilez said.

On Sundays, the Bidens will still be in the pews of St. Joseph on the Brandywine Roman Catholic Church just as they have been for decades. After the service, their habit is to stop by Janssen’s Market, where Xavier Vega, the weekend cook there, will fix up Mr. Biden’s usual breakfast: eggs over easy with a side of dry wheat toast.

Their beloved house will continue to serve as a refuge for the entire Biden clan. The only real change will be that Mr. Biden will need a new car, since the 1967 Corvette that he got from his father and still cherishes is just for special occasions.

http://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2017/01/joe-biden-barack-obama-partnership-white-house-214662

They spoke alone at their weekly lunches and alone after the Presidential Daily Briefing on intelligence and almost every important meeting when both were in Washington. But sometimes, their most important communication was unspoken. Obama and Biden worked in wordless tandem in the Situation Room, where Biden served as what Obama told me he called “my hidden proxy.” By pre-arrangement familiar to fans of buddy cop movies, Biden posed tough questions and offered provocative ideas that Obama wanted discussed but preferred not to raise himself, for fear of tilting the debate.

liked this -

Biden likes to say that “when they call me ‘Middle Class Joe,’ they don’t mean it as a compliment.” He’s still ticked off at Eric Schmidt, the executive chairman of Google, for lobbying him on an internet piracy bill with the argument: “You understand we’re the economic engine of America. We will deluge the White House.” Biden offered respect for Google’s “value-added” but told me he felt like throwing Schmidt out of his office. He pointed out that, all together, the tech sector employed fewer workers than GM shed in a single year during the Great Recession.

yeah fuck eric schmidt

here is a horribly, horribly written story that contains a gem of clearest Joe
http://www.foxbusiness.com/politics/2017/06/23/joe-biden-s-beef-with-bill-ackman-sparks-heated-exchange-and-presidential-chatter.html

Biden explained that part of the decision stemmed from the death of his son Beau Biden, who died of brain cancer in 2015. The room grew quiet as Biden became emotional, and said: “I’m sorry…I’ve said enough.”

That’s when Ackman blurted out “Why? That’s never stopped you before.”

The formal, and understated dinner conversation suddenly turned tense, according to three people who were present and confirmed both the substance and the wording of Biden’s responses.
Biden, these people say, turned to someone seated near him, and asked, “who is this asshole?,” a reference to Ackman.

Then he turned directly to Ackman and stated: “look, I don't know who you are, wiseass, but never disrespect the memory of my dead son!” these people say.

Ackman attempted what was described as an apology, to which Biden said, "just shut the hell up."

(and here is nymag's attempt to edit it into something people would read: http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2017/06/biden-owned-a-billionaire-who-mocked-him-over-his-late-son.html)

fuck Joe btw

Joe Biden: "I wish I had been able to do more for Anita Hill. I owe her an apology." https://t.co/NKi2RBHm7F

— Kyle Griffin (@kylegriffin1) December 14, 2017

He was the chairman of the senate judiciary committee. He was ABLE to do more than he did. Also, on "owing" her an apology...it's been 26 years, dude.

— Rebecca Traister (@rtraister) December 14, 2017

You might think having been vice president would help Joe Biden get elected, but the last Democratic Party vice president to become president (without their predecessor dying in office) was Martin Van Buren in 1836.

— Jon Schwarz (@schwarz) January 7, 2019

this balloon got mad experience in losing

The thread in and of itself is unobjectionable, lord knows we're gonna need a rolling lolling Biden thread for at least 4 years

xpost

― some dude, Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Joe Biden is who the Jon Hamm character on 30 Rock grows up into.