Defend The Indefensible: Neil McCormick's 'People I Don't Know Are Trying To Kill Me'

"He’s the walking joke that doesn’t know its own punchline. He’s “good friends” with flag-waving hair-weaving stadium pygmy Bono (by the way, is the new iPod Nano named after him?). People he doesn’t know are trying to kill him. He’s Neil McCormick.

At the Robbie Williams album playback this week, our man with an ego the size of Kettering and a self-awareness the size of his grey, maggoty little cock, was stomping around, yammering on and on about himself.

Neil hijacked (isn’t hijacking a ‘form of terrorism’, Neil?) the whole event to talk about HIS OWN SINGLE, plus his book. He concluded - to Robbie and a flabbergasted studio - with the following quote tumbling uninvited from his leprous lips:

"Well Robbie, at least I've had a track on an album featuring Bob Dylan and Leonard Cohen.""

I remember this.

Who was "Tim Smith" then?

Used to live with a guy called Tim Smith, he was hallucinated an entire conversation with Mr Scruff while on acid.

"Well Robbie, at least I've had a track on an album featuring Bob Dylan and Leonard Cohen.""

Worst Zing Evah? What's the opposite of "pwned" ?

Emancipated.

If memory serves this McCormick was the bass player in a late-period line up of, I think, 18 Wheeler. Seriously.

Or maybe it was (Perspex) Whiteout, now that I think about it. One of the two anyway.

Oh blimey, Whiteout. Nearly forgotten them completely...

Apologies for preventing that from happening.

Another year and it would have. Never mind. Accepted.

He was in a terrible 'power pop' outfit called Yeah! Yeah! - love those exclamation marks - in Dublin in the early eighties and wrote tweely for Hot Press.

"Whiteout? Are you sure you don't mean Whitehouse?"

This guy vs The Guardian.

Geir vs ILM.

the title would be good if it were by Wesley Willis

Neil has opinions!

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/music/music-news/11192852/Why-none-of-these-albums-deserves-to-win-the-Mercury-Prize.html

the People I Don't Know Are Trying To Kill Me video doesn't seem to be on the internet anymore ;_;

You keep waiting for Gorillaz to storm the studio and stick a rocket up his posterior.

so we just repost every line of this piece in italics one bit at a time then?

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