Do I need to call an exorcist for my girlfriend?

a friend of mine from work takes zombie movies too seriously and has had dreams that her mom tried to eat her...

nowhere near as cool as what you guys are talking about but blah....

That is the best fucking thing I've ever heard!

There's a whole record. Del Close. Allegedly one of Brian Wilson's favorites. I'll sendspace it to you.

I only go nuts if I fall asleep sitting up

abbott, check yr email

I got woken up the other night by some sleep talk, the end of which which went like this:

He: (impatiently) "What if we have to wait an HOUR for him to play?!"

Me: "Who?"

He: "Rivers Cuomo!"

My ex-boyfriend slept through alarms all the time. Once ours went off and he said "Are they serving breakfast?" "Who?" I replied. "The Rice Krispy company." "I doubt it," I said. "Well, why did they wake me up so early?"

BAHAHAHA wow!

They are the only two guys I've dated who talk in their sleep. A good way to encourage it is to ask them nonsense questions while they're drifting off. If they catch you, you can pretend you're talking in your sleep yourself. I love sleep talk!

The guy I am currently with spouted once off a long string of unrelated words (earlier that same Rivers Cuomo night, actually!), and he acted really adamant about whatever he thought he was saying, and grabbed my arm really firmly. It was complete nonsense, definitely not a sentence. All nouns.

My youngest sister always talks in her sleep (and sometimes sleepwalks). When she was very young they all sounded like The Incredible Journey-style adventures:

"We have to get the rabbits over the mountain"

"We can't let the cookies fight with the onion"

"I can't put that many squirrels in my backpack. I can't help feed them all."

omg leave the poor squirrels alone, abbiesister, i'm sure they'll be fine

but lord knows maybe they were on mars and there were no trees

I talk in my sleep. I also once, allegedly, had loud sex dream about female friend my then gf DESPISED.

I really wouldn't recommend that to anyone in a relationship. "What did I say? Oh....right. Yeah I'd be annoyed too. I didn't mean to though. I mean I was asleep. I don't actually like her in that way".

I had a girlfriend who was pissed at me for a whole day because apparently she had a dream in which I was mean to her..

It's YOUR dream psycho...

my ex used to have loads of dreams that i was cheating on him, and dreams about being forced to watch me have orgies with like 5 guys. he'd wake up really upset and be weird with me the whole day.

talk about projection - it turned out he'd actually cheated on me.

like kissing the air ultra fast 30 times in as many seconds

Apparently (according to my ex-girlfriend) I did things like this quite a bit. Once I also sat up in bed yelling "BEARS! BEARS! BEARS! BEARS! BEARS! BEARS! BEARS! BEARS! BEARS! BEARS! BEARS! BEARS! BEARS! BEARS! BEARS! ... eric ... vellum."

So I wonder what causes the rapid repetition thing.

God, my dreams are SOOOOO boring recently. Is it a sign of getting old? I haven't even had sex in a dream for about two years. I'm usually shopping or something. I wish I woke up babbling or something.

I've been known to sit up with a start yelling "--aaaat the fuck!"

I famously woke my gf up one night with by groping around the bed. She wakes up and asks what I'm looking for: "Dammit Niki, it's the Cinnabons, isn't it?"

ruby's last post = whoa nelly, call the head doctor on this dude

i dumped his ass (eventually) instead. believe me - the crazy dreams were just the tip of his insane iceberg!

xpost to myself unless you were somehow dropping hints that you were unhappy with him and what you REALLY wanted was a 5-dude gangbang while he was strapped into a clockwork-orange-like apparatus. That seems a whole lot less likely than him just having MASSIVE issues that not even years of therapy have taught me handy names for.

xpost good girl, that's bad news, right there

i mean, the words for that kind of nuts you don't hear in therapy, you hear on episodes of Law & Order and CSI, know what I mean?

oh yes, i do know what you mean.

OMG, I can't believe I never posted about the time she sat up and said

"BLIMPS...with the EYES"

She's entered a hellish realm and has met some now deceased Australian National Party politicians.

awesome :)

moley to thread: tell me who i'm gonna end up married to!

-- Rubyredd

Ruby, I missed this. Are you still unmarried?

yeah but not for long...

i still love that 'poofy' post - that just cracks me up :)

Yeah, that became one of our cute memes. I will slightly embarassedly share that the newest cute meme in our life is something she made up while awake - singing "Kiss and a head-tilt...for you!" to the tune of "Shave and a Haircut" and simultaneously blowing a kiss and tilting her head to the side in the pause.

so you should just think about this stuff when you get sad about the stuff on that other thread.

http://onesorryblog.files.wordpress.com/2007/06/fursomcover.jpg

Link please Maria:D?

Tell us about this lucky man ruby - or, spookily, perhaps you'd like me to tell you about him?????

we'll be getting married primarily for the purpose of a visa, but he's the whole reason i want the visa in the first place. in brief: he's the most awesome person i've ever met in my whole life, in pretty much every way. also: he is a total babe (bonus).

www.myspace.com/dionmcgregor

The other night she urgently called me into the room to ask me, quite cheerfully, "Did the envelope pengalope?"

well did it?

my wife does this, too. encourage it, nighttime lulz are hard to come by.

It's true. Nighttime roffles are scarce indeed. There was one time that I told myself a joke in my sleep that made me laugh so hard I woke up.

But that was an isolated incident.

My husband says some seriously funny shit sometimes, cracking me up. I always think, "I've GOT to remember this in the morning" but never do.

Alas, I never understand my husband's jokes. He finds'em hilarious though.

Your poor husband. Or poor you, I'm not certain which.

Last night:

Anguished cry from bedroom.

Me, running in: "What's wrong?"

Wife: "Is there bingling?"

...

An hour later:

Call from bedroom.

I go in.

My wife, eyes half open, repeatedly rubs the bridge of her nose with her index finger and puts her finger to her mouth as though tasting something and says "Mmmm"

she's cheating on you

So????

Was there bingling!?!????

[Cue guitar riff from "Scorpio" and LL Cool J]

has she seen this thread?

either you stop pengaloping envelopes or there'll be trouble

Every time I have arranged to exorcise a girlfirend it has ruined our sex. You were wise to resist the temptation.

perhaps you mistakenly had them sexorcised instead?

hahahaa