ASK A GABBNEB

dear mr gabbneb,

texts are quite useful for sending concise bursts of information in less time than a phone call. they also can deliver this information without needed to be received in real-time and cannot be forgotten, only deliberately deleted. a 'where the fuck is this place?' text sent to one's drinking companions can be promptly responded with a 'ne30th and broadway, ya fuckin loser. i told you before lol' which allows one to find the proper establishment for the evening.

your humble servant,

mr kingfish

(It's a charter school now.

The kids play out in the old parking lot on this Jacob's Ladder rope deal, and I just know that one of them is going to fall off of it and break their little neck.

I'd take a picture for you all, but my name isn't Kenan Hebert.(

Dear gabbnebb,

Long have a yearned for a thorough assay of hats by a modern 'typical guy' (for lack of a better term). You have really made my week.

Haberdashedly,

Abbott

I wore the hat on consecutive nights to large arena rock concerts by a musical group that shall remain nameless

hahahahahajhahahahahaha

OH MAN

hahaha

mr 'fish,

while i do not spend a great deal of time in drinking establishments and pride myself upon knowing where everything is, i understand this particular sort of utilitarian value to texting. i guess i find the enterprise sort of a passive-aggressive half-measure. perhaps this is because i have not approached it in the more direct fashion you suggest.

thank you for the additional optics,
mr 'neb

xp - now that wasn't called for, Mr. Plains

Abbott,

I am glad that you, unlike I, were willing to risk 'haberdashedly.' However, as I too-faintly implied above, I would seek to avoid giving the impression that my opinions and tastes are those of a "modern 'typical guy'," at least of the sort that predominates in our community here; in fact, they are more likely to be anything but.

With concern,
gabbneb

gabbneb,

thank you for introducing me to zabar's, i go there all the time now. if i am a really lousy mood and don't feel like walking very far, i go to E.A.T. and get very expensive $9 matzoh ball soup that completely rules.

i need to try more of the places you mentioned.

ok i also have a question.

why is a premade egg salad sandwich at e.a.t. like $12? is it really special? it looks so normal!

Dearest gabbnebb,

Hence my addendum to my shortly & inadequately conceived phrase. I am well aware that yours are not the tastes & opinions of that nebulous typical 'modern guy.' I know yours are not those of the typical ILXor male. I suppose I meant "tastes of a tasteful man who does not have the tasteful tastes of a typical tasteful ILX man."

Borderline lucidly,

Abbott

Dearest gabbneb,

I have now learned how to properly spell your handle, and with this new era comes a new question: what is your favorite smell?

In curiosity,

Abbott

b_labs,

while i must note that zabar's is the original institution on the west side, and eli's the more recent east side establishment owned by a more entrepreneurial member of the family, i am glad that you find it useful and enjoyable.

you're welcome,
g_neb

p.s. i stopped in at E.A.T. on a recent night when time was short and it was on my route, and was shocked - SHOCKED - at the prices i was forced to spend for my simple picnic food.

bell,

i believe the answer would have something to do with the comparative rent of commercial space on madison and third avenues, and also with the fact that the night i stopped in at E.A.T., my two fellow shoppers were high school age girls, dressed a la mode, who appeared little concerned with cost. the working adults who use Eli's as grocery store would pay about half the price for the same sandwich.

confusing, huh?
gabb

it makes sense. everything on madison is ridiculously expensive, which makes finding lunch around my work difficult. i just wondered if they had a "famous" egg salad or something.

gabbbbbb,

if you will humor me some more...

was it a dmb concert? or phish?

also: what is your favorite opera/symphony/classical work?

go friday!

t

Abbott,

I am pleased that you have asked a question to which I have an immediate answer. While careful reflection might well produce a different answer, my instinctive response is that my favorite smell is that produced by rain on red desert soil.

earthily,
gabbneb with three b's

Dear Gneb,

Is EAT the same chain of the same name as the one in London?

Where should I get lunch today around 33rd and 5th?

Ed

oh also!

do zabar's roof-grown tomatoes and greens live up to the hype i saw on martha stewart? it looked pretty neat!!

ttttt,

i really must turn to other matters, but will note the hat i describe would really not be appropriate for the more humorless and 'normal' fans of the dave matthews band.

i am cautious to select a single work, particularly in the opera arena, given insufficient depth of musical knowledge, but i think that i can safely say, based as many things are upon childhood exposure, that my favorite symphony is beethoven's 7th. it is possible that in time it might come to be replaced by a work of Mahler.

signing off for now,
nebbbb

Ed,

As to your first question, I haven't the faintest idea, but would guess not. As to your second, there are a number of good indian places in the area. Saravaanas is well-reputed, and Curry in a Hurry a good quick stop. If you have the time and means, perhaps you would enjoy a cheese plate at Artisanal. There are also a number of suggestions in the wider area by Lauren and myself, I believe on the New York Restaurants thread.

time-sensitively,
neb

'Nebbbb,

How did you like the show in Damrosch?

Sincerely,

Emily

T,

You pull me back in. Eli grows very good heirloom tomatoes on his roof, but I believe that most of those sold in his store recently are from Eckerton Farms, which also sells them at Union Square for less money.

LATERS/choom gang 4 eva,
gabby

E,

You would like me to get no work done today? I thought the music was aight; some of the Ex songs were especially enjoyable, especially the Zorn-ish squealy stuff. I missed Extra Golden. Y'all should have said hello; I could have bestowed my peace offering upon you.

5000,
B

b,

have you been billing all this time? ;)

t

(you don't have to answer that)

t,

i bill the time i work.

b

p.s. i thought it was a very nice night, and the stars were pretty good for manhattan

G,

We would have said hello, but you kept running away! There was a crowd of like 10 ILXors; I can't believe you missed us.

-E.

Gabbneb –

Rumours or Tusk?

I hope it's tusk!

E,

I am a mover. Found it hard to see from the seats, so kept looking for an elevated spot; finally found one before the Ex. Where were y'all?

G.

gabbneb -

why didnt you answer my question asshole

dn.

Al,

Dunno!

Don't stop thinkin' about Obama,
Neb

dn,

Perhaps you already know the answer?

Sorry,
gab

most people drop the douche sctick on their ask me threads but whatever

Dear Gab,

the answer was a pastrami and kraut sandwich and a cel-ray

Ed

Ed,

Excellent choice.

Gab

cel-ray!!!

A cel-abratory treat because I have achieved my first target weight on my diet ahead of time.

lol! good for you! cel-ray is awesome!

gab,

when you say "a work of mahler" might replace beet 7 as yr favorite, did you have a particular work in mind? mahler's awesome, but i fear i am more familiar with his vocal works than symphonic, though one of his works for voice + orchestra is one of my favorite all time pieces.

happy weekend!

t

t,

i'm afraid no more answers are available at this time.

gotta run,
neb

DENIED

Dear tehresa,

These are busy times here at Gabbneb Industries; we apologize for the delay.

To follow up on your most recent query, you are referring to Das Lied von Erde, yes? While quite possibly my favorite "work of Mahler," and one of my favorites in general, I don't generally think of it as a symphony per se, and I did not have one particular work in mind.

Good issue-spotting,
'neb

P.S. There is no game here. Not on my part, at least, lol.
P.P.S. I'm not a "game" kind of dude; too "self-important" (or selfless - you decide) for that.

gabbneb,

really?

De quod non curat lex?

Dear MW,

Your questions are important to us, but we speak American here at ASK A GABBNEB.

Parochially,
'neb

gab,

i was actually thinking of Kindertotenlieder, not Das Lied von der Erde, though those are nice as well. No, they are not symphonies, but they do fall under "classical works" though i guess if you really wanted to be a stickler they're not from the classical period, but you know, generalizations.

i am confused about the game thing?

-t

Minimis, my dear 'neb!

M

M,

"Matters of small concern should be treated seriously."

*gong*
'neb

I have a trivia question for gabbneb:

In which two states did Ross Perot finish 2nd in 1992? In one, he got more votes than Clinton; in the other, he got more votes than Bush.

How do you know he's not gonna just look it up?

Well, that wouldn't be very fun, would it?