Star Wars: Episode III spoilers here

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http://phatooine.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=1685

(Special thanks to Slashdot for the hookup)

― Girolamo Savonarola, Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:43 (twenty-two years ago)

i hear that timberlake dude turns into a cyborg

― cinniblount (James Blount), Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:45 (twenty-two years ago)

as long as James Earl Jones and Peter Mayhew get real paid i will be delirious

― stevem (blueski), Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:46 (twenty-two years ago)

summary please

― Jaunty Alan (Alan), Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:47 (twenty-two years ago)

issa people gonna die?

― cinniblount (James Blount), Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:48 (twenty-two years ago)

yes, him for starters!

― stevem (blueski), Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:48 (twenty-two years ago)

HURRAH!!

― robster (robster), Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Anakin loses even more limbs (how the hell did this guy get to be a Jedi? jeez)

― stevem (blueski), Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:49 (twenty-two years ago)

stevem clip and paste as site is shutdown due slashdotgangbangahoy

― cinniblount (James Blount), Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:50 (twenty-two years ago)

I saw the thread title and thought, for a moment, that this film had already been.

― RJG (RJG), Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:50 (twenty-two years ago)

summary please

Anakin goes to the Dark Side and becomes Darth Vader. Palpatine becomes Emperor. All the Jedi except Yoda and Obi-Wan are wiped out. Luke and Leia are born. But these aren't exactly spoilers.

― Girolamo Savonarola, Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:50 (twenty-two years ago)

No wait let me guess....

Big space battle
Horrible acting & dialog
Big chase scene
Crappy acting & dialog
Gigantic space battle
More crappy acting & dialog
Chase Scene
Giant battle
Bad acting
End credits

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:51 (twenty-two years ago)

That's pretty much all six films. (Anyone who thinks otherwise is in denial.)

― Girolamo Savonarola, Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:53 (twenty-two years ago)

The first line on the page: "This is an effort to put all existing news and current rumor together in such a way that we (the fans) can visualize what Star Wars Episode 3 will be like over a year before hand"

So, utter bollocks, more likely than not.

haha Aaron W OTM. How do these things leak out?

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:53 (twenty-two years ago)

i didnt go to the site, just mentioning what i already knew. there was a very good fan-script (voted the best so far a few months back) via theforce.net that is quite probably based on leaks from the final draft. everything is tied up pretty well, the only drawback i can see is that there's not ENOUGH Vader but i suppose that's to be expected. I think Dooku explains more about Qui-Gon's crapness as a Jedi resulting in no vanishing act when killed. Chewy and Boba are supposed to be in it, not sure about Jar jar tho.

― stevem (blueski), Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Does the King return?

― Pete (Pete), Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:55 (twenty-two years ago)

HAHAHAHA

(also Girolamo is totally OTM about all six movies)

― Allyzay, Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:58 (twenty-two years ago)

How do these things leak out?

Well, they already have filmed most of it. Generally speaking, most of these rumors are what are considered "hard" rumors, stuff that's been verified through several people or that they actually have scans of the concept artwork; both Ep I and II had fairly complete synopses by this point in time before release that were mostly accurate. I'm certain that there will be changes made by Lucas down the road, but I tend to think that most of this is the real McCoy. (As much as anyone can tell at this point w/o the CGI.)

― Girolamo Savonarola, Thursday, 11 December 2003 15:59 (twenty-two years ago)

when do they celebrate Life Day?

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Thursday, 11 December 2003 16:27 (twenty-two years ago)

When the wookie porn is available.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 11 December 2003 16:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Define Wookiiee porn. (they don't wear clothes anyhoo!)

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Thursday, 11 December 2003 16:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Little do you know that the utility belt serves to cover the Wookie genitals, which are located on a Wookiee's left shoulder.

― Girolamo Savonarola, Thursday, 11 December 2003 16:34 (twenty-two years ago)

one word for you: SHAVED

― stevem (blueski), Thursday, 11 December 2003 16:34 (twenty-two years ago)

I HATE YOU SO MUCH RIGHT NO! AAAAAAAARGH!

― Kelis (Dan Perry), Thursday, 11 December 2003 16:37 (twenty-two years ago)

wait til you see the bit where they bring out the Wampa...

― stevem (blueski), Thursday, 11 December 2003 16:38 (twenty-two years ago)

"Wanna Wanga?"

― Girolamo Savonarola, Thursday, 11 December 2003 16:39 (twenty-two years ago)

saw it on the weekend, total bummer

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Thursday, 11 December 2003 20:10 (twenty-two years ago)

what, Wookiee porn?

― stevem (blueski), Friday, 12 December 2003 11:58 (twenty-two years ago)

http://ordresith.free.fr/actualite/arkham/images/wookie.jpg

http://www.spinster.org/photos/black_fleet/wookie.jpg

Naarrghg-hhh--hhh!

― Alfie (Alfie), Friday, 12 December 2003 12:38 (twenty-two years ago)

That's gotta be the cutest couple I've ever seen! The first one looks more like a dog, mind you.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Friday, 12 December 2003 13:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Jawa Porn has a large following in the outer rim, I'ver heard.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Friday, 12 December 2003 13:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Taken by some drunk at Detroit's Dally in the Alley back in September:
http://www.osric.com/~jeremy/imp2.jpg

On the left, some guy who thought it'd be fun to wear his armor to the festivities. On the right, yours truly.

― El Santo Claus (Kingfish), Friday, 12 December 2003 14:13 (twenty-two years ago)

I can imagine that someone with a stormtropper costume would want to wear it at any given opportunity. His friends must turn up at parties, look around and say "Yep, Ken's wearing the stormtrooper costume again". "He's just added a dog collar because this is a vicars and tarts party".

Now this is just scary:

http://perso.wanadoo.fr/claire.fred/GN-SW/wookie2.JPG

― Alfie (Alfie), Friday, 12 December 2003 14:23 (twenty-two years ago)

is that an ewok or a HARVESTER OF SORROWS?!

― El Santo Claus (Kingfish), Friday, 12 December 2003 14:26 (twenty-two years ago)

seven months pass...

ANAKIN HAS STROKES HAIR!

Don't believe me? check it:

http://www.starwars.com/episode-iii/bts/production/news20040625.html

more specifically:

http://www.starwars.com/episode-iii/bts/production/img/20040625_bg.jpg

― Kingfish von Bandersnatch (Kingfish), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 04:13 (twenty-one years ago)

That's pretty much all six films. (Anyone who thinks otherwise is in denial.)
-- Girolamo Savonarola (gsa...), December 11th, 2003.

OTM.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 04:34 (twenty-one years ago)

I got a spoiler for you...you'll leave the theatre in stunned silence and vow to burn your Return of the Jedi bedding as soon you get home.

― Huck, Wednesday, 21 July 2004 04:56 (twenty-one years ago)

ha! i have EMPIRE bedding!

who's the fool NOW?!

― Kingfish von Bandersnatch (Kingfish), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 05:11 (twenty-one years ago)

I had pound puppies bed sheets til I was in middle school.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 05:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Due to my parents not throwing them away than anything else.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 05:19 (twenty-one years ago)

omigod, I did too. With pillow cases, too.

― j e r e m y (x Jeremy), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 15:22 (twenty-one years ago)

i hear that timberlake dude turns into a cyborg
-- cinniblount (littlejohnnyjewe...),

Episode 2.5: Attack Of The Clones features Timberlake, Ryan Phillippe and Hayden Christensen.

In other words, someone finally sees what I see.

― R.I.M.A. (Barima), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 15:46 (twenty-one years ago)

i had ROTJ bedding

when do they announce the title of the film? what are the latest suggestions? MUST have Jedi in surely - Fall Of The Jedi?

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 16:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Star Wars Ep. III - The Search For Curly's Gold

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 16:20 (twenty-one years ago)

I'd go to see that.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 16:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Episode III: How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The Sith

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 16:22 (twenty-one years ago)

ha ha

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 16:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Episode III: I, Vader

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 16:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Episode III - Y Tu Mama Tatooine

― Velveteen Bingo (Chris V), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 16:50 (twenty-one years ago)

Episode III: Being Vader
Episode III: Fuck All Y'All, Here Comes Tha Ewokz!

― Huk-El (Horace Mann), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 16:52 (twenty-one years ago)

You And Me And A Gundark Makes III

― Jay Vee (Manon_70), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 17:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Star Wars Ep. III - The Search For Curly's Gold

Palpatine's Gold, surely.

Episode III: Not Another Teen Movie (On Purpose)

― j.lu (j.lu), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 18:35 (twenty-one years ago)

Episode III: What, You're Still Watching These?

― Huk-El (Horace Mann), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 18:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Episode III: While You Were Standing In Line For This Movie, Your Mom Found Your Stash of Ladies' Hosiery Under Your Mattress

― Huk-El (Horace Mann), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 18:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Episode III: Now Aren't You Sorry Lucas Went and Made Episodes I-III?

― j.lu (j.lu), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 18:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Episode III: Now The Franchise Is Complete (When I Left You I Was A Gajillionaire But Now I'm A Fucking Mogul)

― R.I.M.A. (Barima), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 19:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Episode III: Wookies on Patrol

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Wednesday, 21 July 2004 19:58 (twenty-one years ago)

Episode III: I don't mean like Roman Numerals Three, I mean like "Ai yai yai!"

― Huck, Wednesday, 21 July 2004 20:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Episode III: Wookies on Patrol

with Steve Guttenberg as supreme Jedi Master 'Dork Schnitzel' - actually wasn't that name used in Spaceballs?

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Thursday, 22 July 2004 09:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Episode III: Assignment Miami Beach

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Thursday, 22 July 2004 10:11 (twenty-one years ago)

ACTUAL PHOTO FROM SET OF EPISODE III!!

ihttp://www.bestmessageboardever.com/uploads/post-5-1089261683.jpg

― Ade (Adrian Langston), Thursday, 22 July 2004 10:54 (twenty-one years ago)

haha i thought that wouldn't work for some reason. sdgjh.

ihttp://www.bestmessageboardever.com/uploads/post-5-1089261683.jpg ?? afhfklh

― Ade (Adrian Langston), Thursday, 22 July 2004 10:54 (twenty-one years ago)

ah fuck it

― Ade (Adrian Langston), Thursday, 22 July 2004 10:54 (twenty-one years ago)

what the hell kind of crazy anime/manga is that?

― teeny (teeny), Thursday, 22 July 2004 10:58 (twenty-one years ago)

it's a yaoi doujin, two tributaries of anime/manga 'fandom' that have their own very elaborate subcultures. (yaoi = roughly equivalent to slashfic, doujin = fan-produced manga/art that is nearly an industry in of itself)

more importantly, DARTH MAUL IS PINK~!

― Ade (Adrian Langston), Thursday, 22 July 2004 11:10 (twenty-one years ago)

i just discovered that the Hayden Christensen is Canadian. ouch. although at least his bad acting is consistent with the whole series.

OMG DARTH VADER IS FROM VANCOUVER!

― Rob Bolton (Rob Bolton), Thursday, 22 July 2004 12:05 (twenty-one years ago)

James Earl Jones is from the Isle Of Sheppey

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Thursday, 22 July 2004 12:05 (twenty-one years ago)

i just discovered that the Hayden Christensen is Canadian. ouch. although at least his bad acting is consistent with the whole series.
OMG DARTH VADER IS FROM VANCOUVER!

-- Rob Bolton (i_like_my_vesp...), July 22nd, 2004.

true but he alos seemed to be the only person in that movie who was actually emoting.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Thursday, 22 July 2004 12:08 (twenty-one years ago)

David Prowse is from Bristol!

― Rob Bolton (Rob Bolton), Thursday, 22 July 2004 12:08 (twenty-one years ago)

and Jake Lloyd is from Colorado

― Rob Bolton (Rob Bolton), Thursday, 22 July 2004 12:10 (twenty-one years ago)

So Mr. Vader is 1/4 Canadian, 1/4 American, and 1/2 British!

― Rob Bolton (Rob Bolton), Thursday, 22 July 2004 12:10 (twenty-one years ago)

One of my coworkers has a "David Prowse as Darth Vader" action figure in replica packaging with a removable helmet!

― I CAN LEAD YOU THROUGH THE ZONE (ex machina), Thursday, 22 July 2004 12:13 (twenty-one years ago)

hold on - James Earl Jones is from Arkabutla, Mississippi!! what's this isle of sheppey business?

― Rob Bolton (Rob Bolton), Thursday, 22 July 2004 12:13 (twenty-one years ago)

welcome to britain dude

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Thursday, 22 July 2004 12:36 (twenty-one years ago)

I though Hayden Christiansen was from Mississagua.

― Huck, Thursday, 22 July 2004 14:11 (twenty-one years ago)

no, Pontefract

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Thursday, 22 July 2004 14:12 (twenty-one years ago)

No, Tattooine.

― Captain Nerd of the Nerd Patrol, Thursday, 22 July 2004 14:16 (twenty-one years ago)

Mongrel breeding.

― R.I.M.A. (Barima), Thursday, 22 July 2004 17:29 (twenty-one years ago)

last i heard the movie was called Birth of the Empire

maybe it will be as racist as Birth of a Nation, that would be interesting.

― Richard K (Richard K), Thursday, 22 July 2004 19:12 (twenty-one years ago)

So that would make it slightly less racist than Episode I?

― Huck, Thursday, 22 July 2004 19:47 (twenty-one years ago)

five months pass...

http://img27.exs.cx/img27/7407/groupcombined1jo.jpg

vanity fair shot of the combined cast from the 6 flicks

― kingfish (Kingfish), Thursday, 6 January 2005 02:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Jake Lloyd looks like he has Down's syndrome in that pic.

― Steely Zan (AaronHz), Thursday, 6 January 2005 02:48 (twenty-one years ago)

WTF is with Jar Jar being in there? Stick in a cardboard cutout of Alec Guinness while you're at it.

― Steely Zan (AaronHz), Thursday, 6 January 2005 02:57 (twenty-one years ago)

what a sorry looking bunch of humans

― Carl Winslow and Jeanne-Claude (deangulberry), Thursday, 6 January 2005 03:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Yoda must be Oscar the Grouch's grandfather.

― Girolamo Savonarola, Thursday, 6 January 2005 12:26 (twenty-one years ago)

billy dee looks smooth as usual. colt 45

― Big Baby Bingo (Chris V), Thursday, 6 January 2005 13:03 (twenty-one years ago)

Marla Gibbs would concur.

― Leon the Fatboy (Ex Leon), Thursday, 6 January 2005 14:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Now all I can think is Action Jackson and Billy Dee wasn't even in it!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 6 January 2005 14:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Who's the white dude behind Jar Jar on that pic?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 6 January 2005 15:29 (twenty-one years ago)

that's Ric Olie who plays...someone (Bail Organa?) in Episode 2

― Stevem On X (blueski), Thursday, 6 January 2005 15:32 (twenty-one years ago)

George Lucas isn't in any of the movies, what the fuck is he doing in that photo?

― Huk-L, Thursday, 6 January 2005 15:38 (twenty-one years ago)

And what's that alien between the old dude and the black dude? It looks like something out of Fifth Element...

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 6 January 2005 15:46 (twenty-one years ago)

mark hammill looks like he wants to go home

― kyle (akmonday), Thursday, 6 January 2005 16:16 (twenty-one years ago)

The normally attrractive Ewan McGregor looks like a lurid midget.

― jocelyn (Jocelyn), Thursday, 6 January 2005 16:17 (twenty-one years ago)

(xxpost) I think it's some new "heavy" from EP.III Yeah - doesn't look too promising.

― Jay Vee (Manon_70), Thursday, 6 January 2005 17:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Where's The Motherfucking Fett?

― Captain GRRRios' Giggletits (Barima), Thursday, 6 January 2005 17:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Probably somewhere getting taken out like a punk.

― Leon the Fatboy (Ex Leon), Thursday, 6 January 2005 17:06 (twenty-one years ago)

three weeks pass...

http://www.yakface.com/2005/walmart/walmart.shtml

the Merchandizing....has begun

― Kingfish MuffMiner 2049er (Kingfish), Monday, 31 January 2005 07:14 (twenty-one years ago)

WARNING: LOTS OF FILM STILLS - MAJOR SPOILAGE

― Girolamo Savonarola, Monday, 31 January 2005 13:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Oooh pretty.

Will Walmart be carrying the Burned-to-a-Crisp Anakin action figure?

― robster (robster), Monday, 31 January 2005 13:38 (twenty-one years ago)

DARTH VADER DOES NOT NEED A SHIELD.

― Jimmy Mod always makes friends with women before bedding them down (ModJ), Monday, 31 January 2005 14:29 (twenty-one years ago)

big nightmares for teh kids, wooo!

― Stevem On X (blueski), Monday, 31 January 2005 14:39 (twenty-one years ago)

i like that they posted a shot of the make-up test for Crispy-fried Anakin, too. It'd be cool if the finished result actually incorporated the Terminator(T-800) endoskeleton hand.

― Kingfish MuffMiner 2049er (Kingfish), Monday, 31 January 2005 16:08 (twenty-one years ago)

ihttp://img181.exs.cx/img181/1852/sadanakin4kf.jpg

The Agony and the T-800

― Girolamo Savonarola, Wednesday, 2 February 2005 13:31 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.starwars.com/episode-iii/bts/artofrev/

or, more particularly,

http://www.starwars.com/episode-iii/bts/artofrev/2004/10/artofrev20041018.html

female mon calamari!

and there'll be a production number!

― Kingfish MuffMiner 2049er (Kingfish), Sunday, 6 February 2005 06:26 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.galactichunter.com/absolutenm/templates/full_article_template_1.asp?articleid=3759&zoneid=2

PEZ!

― Kingfish MuffMiner 2049er (Kingfish), Sunday, 6 February 2005 06:48 (twenty-one years ago)

toys:

http://www.hasbro.com/starwars/pl/page.news/id.1123/dn/default.cfm

― Kingfish MuffMiner 2049er (Kingfish), Sunday, 6 February 2005 06:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Text of the opening crawl -- along with all the other movies.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 6 February 2005 06:57 (twenty-one years ago)

loadsa stuff found here, especially in the forums

― Kingfish MuffMiner 2049er (Kingfish), Sunday, 6 February 2005 07:00 (twenty-one years ago)

wookie dreads, bitchez!

― Kingfish MuffMiner 2049er (Kingfish), Sunday, 6 February 2005 07:09 (twenty-one years ago)

monsters, senators, aliens, etc in the makeup stage

― Kingfish MuffMiner 2049er (Kingfish), Sunday, 6 February 2005 07:23 (twenty-one years ago)

two weeks pass...

Great big pile of images and plot spoilers. Not sure how reliable the story details are.

― lock robster (robster), Wednesday, 23 February 2005 13:08 (twenty-one years ago)

two weeks pass...

George Lucas says don’t bring young children to see last Star Wars film
NEW YORK (AP) — George Lucas says the newest — and final instalment — of his Star Wars films may get a PG-13 rating.
“I don’t think I would take a 5- or a 6-year-old to this. It’s way too strong,” Lucas says of “Star Wars Episode III — Revenge of the Sith” on CBS’ 60 Minutes, to air Sunday (7 p.m. EST).
“My feeling is that it will probably be a PG-13, so it will be the first Star Wars that’s a PG-13.”
Revenge of the Sith, the third prequel to the original Star Wars trilogy, will open May 19. The movie features Anakin Skywalker’s transformation to Darth Vader, a descent based on Lucas’ vision of hell, a mythical planet composed entirely of erupting volcanoes.
“We’re going to watch him make a pact with the devil,” says the director. “The film is more dark ... more emotional. It’s much more of a tragedy.”
Despite critical pans of Episodes I and II, Lucas says in the interview: “Actually, I am very happy. I’m very pleased with the whole thing.”

― Huk-L, Thursday, 10 March 2005 20:16 (twenty-one years ago)

don't bring anybody

― s1ocki (slutsky), Thursday, 10 March 2005 20:20 (twenty-one years ago)

George Lucas is talking in code; Episode III is a fisting film.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 10 March 2005 20:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Anakin is gonna piss on Obi Wan's face.

― Don't Ever Antagonize The Horny (AaronHz), Thursday, 10 March 2005 20:24 (twenty-one years ago)

"...and you thought you could read pedophilia into E.T.!" - Gene Shalit

― Huk-L, Thursday, 10 March 2005 20:27 (twenty-one years ago)

"a descent based on Lucas’ vision of hell"

I thought that's what the first two movies were! oh wait, that was MY vision of hell....

― Shakey Mo Collier, Thursday, 10 March 2005 20:31 (twenty-one years ago)

BRICK

― TOMBOT, Thursday, 10 March 2005 20:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Episode III - Y Tu Mama Tatooine
Ha ha ha

― 57 7th (calstars), Thursday, 10 March 2005 20:46 (twenty-one years ago)

*whistles idly* No, nothing to see here, tum te tum...

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 11 March 2005 16:45 (twenty-one years ago)

this movie will suck. I will only see it three times.

― Jimmy Mod Has Returned With Spices And Silks (ModJ), Friday, 11 March 2005 17:01 (twenty-one years ago)

That trailer has negated any need to see the film. I will anyway.

― lock robster (robster), Friday, 11 March 2005 17:03 (twenty-one years ago)

C'mon, Lock, you were the chosen one.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 11 March 2005 17:04 (twenty-one years ago)

AND TEH BLACK DOOD GETS BLOWED UP!

― Jimmy Mod Has Returned With Spices And Silks (ModJ), Friday, 11 March 2005 17:04 (twenty-one years ago)

...must... resist.... nnnngg... *goes to Odeon booking site*

― lock robster (robster), Friday, 11 March 2005 17:05 (twenty-one years ago)

It's gonna be funny if Hitchhikers' becomes a bigger hit.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 11 March 2005 17:08 (twenty-one years ago)

no, it will be a tragedy of epic proportions...

― Jimmy Mod Has Returned With Spices And Silks (ModJ), Friday, 11 March 2005 17:10 (twenty-one years ago)

5 year old Jimmy really wants to be excited by this, but 25 year old Jimmy suspects it will still be teh suck

― Jimmy Mod Has Returned With Spices And Silks (ModJ), Friday, 11 March 2005 17:14 (twenty-one years ago)

5 year old Jimmy won't be allowed to see it

― stevie (stevie), Friday, 11 March 2005 17:16 (twenty-one years ago)

It's going to be good
It's going to be good
It's going to be good
It's going to be good
It's going to be good
It's going to be good
It's going to be good
It's going to be good
It's going to be good
It's going to be good
It's going to be good
It's going to be good
It's going to be good
It's going to be good
It's going to be good
It's going to be good

I'm going to be disappointed.

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 11 March 2005 17:19 (twenty-one years ago)

hahaha that's right

x-post

― Jimmy Mod Has Returned With Spices And Silks (ModJ), Friday, 11 March 2005 17:22 (twenty-one years ago)

the FX look better

― latebloomer: damn cheapskate satanists (latebloomer), Friday, 11 March 2005 18:06 (twenty-one years ago)

I was actually noticing that the clouds and sunsets and all looked *really* good -- also, perhaps unsurprisingly, they reminded me more than a little of WETA's excellent work on same for LOTR. I really do think this is Lucas's attempt to play some *major* catch-up.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 11 March 2005 18:08 (twenty-one years ago)

lets hope that extended to the dialogue this time!

― latebloomer: damn cheapskate satanists (latebloomer), Friday, 11 March 2005 18:10 (twenty-one years ago)

"arise my dark apprentice"

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 11 March 2005 18:11 (twenty-one years ago)

the absolutely soul-crushing, mind-numbingly horrible stories my film editor friend at ILM friend has told me about the making of this film are just beyond belief (Lucas bringing his kid to dailies and *taking his advice*, demanding that the animators take actors' facial expressions from one take and super-impose them onto another, etc.) They say its awful.

be afraid. be very afraid.

― Shakey Mo Collier, Friday, 11 March 2005 18:13 (twenty-one years ago)

"that'll teach them for going on about LOTR"

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 11 March 2005 18:15 (twenty-one years ago)

hahahaha on the episode II DVD theres a making-of documentary where Lucas is bitching at one of the ILM animators about the ear-wiggle on Yoda. LIKE THE FUCKING EAR WIGGLE IS YOUR BIGGEST PROBLEM.

― latebloomer: damn cheapskate satanists (latebloomer), Friday, 11 March 2005 18:18 (twenty-one years ago)

"Lucas bringing his kid to dailies and *taking his advice*"

yeah he did that on the other two prequels as well, his son named Jar-Jar supposedly. Plus remember when he put N*Sync in Episode 2 or something (but cut it out when the fans bitched)? I alays wonder if he got his dog to type the script, and then got his goldfish to do some polishing on the final draft.

― latebloomer: damn cheapskate satanists (latebloomer), Friday, 11 March 2005 18:22 (twenty-one years ago)

yeah Episode I was great, but the improper shading on Jar Jar's tongue-flicking in the Tatooine scenes just RUINED IT ALL for me.

x-post

― Shakey Mo Collier, Friday, 11 March 2005 18:23 (twenty-one years ago)

I reckon they should just kill everyone in episode 3.

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 11 March 2005 18:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh, that trailer looks so much better than the movie could actually be.

― Huk-L, Friday, 11 March 2005 18:26 (twenty-one years ago)

I think Hitchhiker's is gonna kill it, honestly.

― Shakey Mo Collier, Friday, 11 March 2005 18:28 (twenty-one years ago)

I reckon the Fantastic Four will be the best movie this year!

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 11 March 2005 18:30 (twenty-one years ago)

quality-wise i'm sure hitchhiker will be better but there's a snowball's chance in hell it's gonna make more money.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Friday, 11 March 2005 18:31 (twenty-one years ago)

oh I dunno, the last Star Wars movie didn't do that great, did it? Surely LotR wiped the floor with it...

― Shakey Mo Collier, Friday, 11 March 2005 18:32 (twenty-one years ago)

oh, it doesn't look so good. The thing is not stoney enough.

http://www.apple.com/trailers/fox/fantastic_four/

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 11 March 2005 18:33 (twenty-one years ago)

clones made $950 million!

― s1ocki (slutsky), Friday, 11 March 2005 18:34 (twenty-one years ago)

(worldwide gross. which yes is less than LoTRs 1 & 3, but LoTR is a huge franchise compared to hitchhiker)

― s1ocki (slutsky), Friday, 11 March 2005 18:35 (twenty-one years ago)

Episode II did about $300 million domestically, $648 million worldwide

― latebloomer: damn cheapskate satanists (latebloomer), Friday, 11 March 2005 18:36 (twenty-one years ago)

every recent superhero movie that is not the X-Men has totally sucked so far. FF will be no different - and that was probably one of the toughest to tackle because, in my opinion, to do it right would mean to translate the kinetic energy and grandeur of Kirby to screen (ie, no easy task). They obviously haven't even bothered to try that approach...

x-post

― Shakey Mo Collier, Friday, 11 March 2005 18:36 (twenty-one years ago)

The clockcleaner of Episode II in the States at least was Spider-Man -- and that's definitely not the level of public awareness Hitchhiker's has! So no, Hitchhikers won't be as big, of course. However, it's playing the card that The Matrix did vis-a-vis Episode I by appearing before Episode III, getting a chance to stand on its own merits and probably benefitting from some kinda "hey this is exciting and funny stuff!" bounce Episode III won't have.

But we'll see.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 11 March 2005 20:04 (twenty-one years ago)

Spider-Man 2 > X-Men 2 > X-Men > Spider-Man

I am eagerly anticipating the Hitchhiker's Guide and will take the punishment doled out by Episode 3.

― mike h. (mike h.), Friday, 11 March 2005 20:07 (twenty-one years ago)

"Lucas bringing his kid to dailies and *taking his advice*"

what's wrong with that? it's a kids movie right?

― Cabaret Voltron (PUNXSUTAWNEY PENIS), Friday, 11 March 2005 20:13 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.bestmessageboardever.com/uploads/post-5-1089261683.jpg

― Cabaret Voltron (PUNXSUTAWNEY PENIS), Friday, 11 March 2005 20:14 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm eagerly awaiting Hitchhiker's but there's NO WAY ON EARTH that it's going to beat Episode III.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 11 March 2005 20:16 (twenty-one years ago)

voltron, his "kid" is a 45-year-old rent boy

― s1ocki (slutsky), Friday, 11 March 2005 20:20 (twenty-one years ago)

"what's wrong with that? it's a kids movie right? "

and when was the last time you saw a great movie made by a little kid?

― Shakey Mo Collier, Friday, 11 March 2005 21:03 (twenty-one years ago)

I think this one looks good actually. This one is the actual story as it was originally conceived. The first two were really about bullshitting his way into another trilogy right?

― Zebra, Alpha Go! (cprek), Friday, 11 March 2005 21:28 (twenty-one years ago)

...but this looks awesome!

FUCK CAUTION, I DON'T CARE ABOUT GETTING MY HEART BROKEN!

THIS MOVIE IS GOING TO RULE SO HARD!

Fuck y'all hipster faggot twentysomething retarded bitch clowns, I didn't use to be ashamed to be a huge star wars fanboy. Now I can't express my love without thirty or so of you little shitgnats rubbing your probosci and chattering about how Lucas has lost it and making shitty puns on the titles of the films.

― Michael Stuchbery (Mikey Bidness), Friday, 11 March 2005 21:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Hitchhikers is going to beat Episode 3? Maybe on the planet Gormless, in the Fatbeard System of the Nerd Nebula!

― Michael Stuchbery (Mikey Bidness), Friday, 11 March 2005 21:31 (twenty-one years ago)

WHATS UP WITH EMPORER FATTEY?!

― Zebra, Alpha Go! (cprek), Friday, 11 March 2005 21:33 (twenty-one years ago)

when the people in the studio making the movie don't want to see it and say it's terrible, I think that should send some warning signs about the viability of the franchise. altho yes I was indulging in some wishful thinking about Hitchhiker's... but who knows? Lucas's cultural cachet seems to be completely spent to me. even the kids I know don't particularly care about this one coming out.

― Shakey Mo Collier, Friday, 11 March 2005 21:35 (twenty-one years ago)

FATBEARD SYSTEM

http://images.gubbish.org/iceburn.gif

― Cabaret Voltron (PUNXSUTAWNEY PENIS), Friday, 11 March 2005 21:55 (twenty-one years ago)

that trailer does look pretty great! (of course i thought that about the first two also)... but it really looks awesome this time!! btw, i didn't notice any christopher lee this time around... doesn't he need to be out of the picture before anakin can become the new apprentice??

― dave k, Friday, 11 March 2005 22:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Fuck y'all hipster faggot twentysomething retarded bitch clowns,

I CAN'T WAIT NIGGA FUCK THAT I CAN'T WAIT

― kingfish van vlasic pickles (Kingfish), Saturday, 12 March 2005 04:46 (twenty-one years ago)

BRING IT ON!

― Michael Stuchbery (Mikey Bidness), Saturday, 12 March 2005 05:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Hang on wait wait, demanding that the animators take actors' facial expressions from one take and super-impose them onto another, etc needs more stunned awe. I mean, uh?

― Gravel Puzzleworth (Gregory Henry), Saturday, 12 March 2005 05:56 (twenty-one years ago)

btw, i didn't notice any christopher lee this time around... doesn't he need to be out of the picture before anakin can become the new apprentice??

He's in like a millisecond of the trailer where Anakin is dueling a guy in a red lightsaber (Lee) in front of the Emperor on the bridge of a starship.

― Girolamo Savonarola, Saturday, 12 March 2005 13:58 (twenty-one years ago)

this film seems like it will be three hours long, so much to pack on, perhaps too much.

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Saturday, 12 March 2005 14:47 (twenty-one years ago)

I dunno, Shakey Mo : even though Lucas' drones at ILM are saying the film is awful, the trailer makes it look like it's going to be a real treat. That is, beside Christensen and Portman's poor acting. Other than that I'm all WOW. It has wookies. I'm there.

― Jay Vee (Manon_70), Saturday, 12 March 2005 16:35 (twenty-one years ago)

Wookies, Shakey Mo, WOOKIES!

― latebloomer: damn cheapskate satanists (latebloomer), Saturday, 12 March 2005 18:50 (twenty-one years ago)

This still isn't going to make up for Jar-Jar, though.

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Saturday, 12 March 2005 19:27 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm holding out hope that Anakin's little rampage alluded to in the trailer will include an unceremonious neck to groin Jar Jar light saber dismemberment.

― Don't Ever Antagonize The Horny (AaronHz), Saturday, 12 March 2005 19:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Lucas can be like, "killing Jar Jar represents the death of innocence blah blah blah."

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Saturday, 12 March 2005 20:08 (twenty-one years ago)

"My kid finally admitted that Jar-Jar was a bad idea. He just wanted to see how far I would take it."

― Don't Ever Antagonize The Horny (AaronHz), Saturday, 12 March 2005 20:11 (twenty-one years ago)

the phenomenon of millions upon millions of people going to see movies that they KNOW are going to disappoint them really deserves more attention. Like my coworker Tony who was going to let one of our other guys on the day shift borrow the Ep. 1 + 2 DVDs so he could get the backstory: "You're gonna hate the first one, and the second one's not so great either, but that way you'll know all the stuff that's going on in number three."

Then Tony stood by my shoulder as we went through the trailer Ned linked frame-by-frame and dissected every clip, and our other coworker plugged his ears with his fingers and went "LA LA LA LA LA I'M NOT LISTENING."

Hitchhiker's will undoubtedly be a better film, in a hundred ways it already is, but there's not a chance on earth it'll make even half the money Episode III is going to rake in.

― TOMBOT, Saturday, 12 March 2005 20:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Batman Begins is gonna rool all these other movies' asses.

― Huk-L, Saturday, 12 March 2005 20:14 (twenty-one years ago)

yeah, we're guilty of the frame-advance with running commentary thing, too. Did it when the previous two trailers, also:

"wookie with bowcaster, red lightsaber, new jedi tie-fighter-lookin' thing, ooo! check it! jedi with tittays!, new clone trooper armor, emperor looks fucked up here, but normal earlier, here's christopher lee, etc."

― kingfish van vlasic pickles (Kingfish), Saturday, 12 March 2005 20:29 (twenty-one years ago)

http://img136.exs.cx/img136/7565/jedihottiesyahoo8cr.jpg

― kingfish van vlasic pickles (Kingfish), Saturday, 12 March 2005 20:36 (twenty-one years ago)

I dunno, Hitchhikers doesn't appeal to me at all.

Anyway, we need to know more about what's gonna happen to C-3PO and R2D2, as Star Wars is all about them, really. I will cry when they get re-programmed.

― jel -- (jel), Saturday, 12 March 2005 20:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Coz, I assume they will have to have their memories wiped, otherwise they'd be all "oh hey! Look it's old Master Anakin! - that's your dad Luke"

― jel -- (jel), Saturday, 12 March 2005 20:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Why does Obi-Kwon not recogonise/acknowledge the droids in New Hope? He could at least wink at them or something and 3-PO could go "oh, how rude".

― jel -- (jel), Saturday, 12 March 2005 20:44 (twenty-one years ago)

God, that's just the tip of the Starship Inexplicable that Capt. Lucas has created. I'm still trying to figure out what are those Jedi Molecules mentioned in Ep1?

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Saturday, 12 March 2005 20:52 (twenty-one years ago)

I assume they will have to have their memories wiped

They will. There's that one bit in the original movie where Uncle Owen "Take the droids and have their memory erased" so it doesn't twist things TOO badly. (Why Obi-Wan's memory was erased as well as Uncle Owen's is another question. ;-))

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 20:56 (twenty-one years ago)

Uh but they don't get their memory erased cuz then they'd forget about Princess Leia.

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Saturday, 12 March 2005 20:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Er, how do you mean? (F'r instance, memory erased now = later, "Hey Leia, here are some droids Captain Antilles owns." "Oh that's nice.")

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:02 (twenty-one years ago)

they do get their memories erased, but they are sent with Leia to Alderaan presumably so get to know her from there on, assuming Bail is her bio father etc.

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:03 (twenty-one years ago)

or yeh what Ned said

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:03 (twenty-one years ago)

ha, i love how so many people will be sitting in the cinema with their little checklist and pen...

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:04 (twenty-one years ago)

I thought you were talking about uh the beginning of whatsitcalled New Hope. But yeah it's still all bollocks. Plot holes is still the least of Lucas' problems (for instance, I'm pretty sure that Samuel L Jackson can act, yet why does it always seem like he's reading the script for the first time?).

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Why does Obi-Kwon not recogonise/acknowledge the droids in New Hope? He could at least wink at them or something and 3-PO could go "oh, how rude"

this never even occurred to me before - damn

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:08 (twenty-one years ago)

yet why does it always seem like he's reading the script for the first time?

maybe, but how could you ever take anyone in this seriously? and how are they going to convince anyone old enough to give a shit about that sort of thing etc.

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:09 (twenty-one years ago)

xpost

I've thought of that myself. (The vague excuse so far -- Obi-Wan has never actually seen C3P0 much if you think about it [in episode I he stayed on the ship while on Tatooine; in two he was busy checking out the clones and then getting captured by bugs]. Perhaps R2 is just a little too generic in StarWarsWorld to count. ;-))

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:11 (twenty-one years ago)

(x post) oK.

Geek Out Time: Doesn't Obi-Wan say something in ANH about owning a droid like R2 "once"? He probably did recognize the droids but was just keeping it cool, letting things unfold once they got back to his little hovel and R2 was able to show him the message from Leia.

Geek Out over.

― Jay Vee (Manon_70), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:16 (twenty-one years ago)

Doesn't Obi-Wan say something in ANH about owning a droid like R2 "once"?

No, the reverse: "Can't remember ever owning a droid" or something like that, said very diffidently to be sure.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:18 (twenty-one years ago)

You're right, Ned.

― Jay Vee (Manon_70), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:21 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm pretty sure in the Star Wars universe a memory wipe on a droid doesn't necessarily mean that the memory is completely and utterly gone. Esp. if the droids are Those Two.

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:38 (twenty-one years ago)

My question (apart from "Why the fuck am I considering going to see it, did I learn nothing from the first two?") is why it takes twenty years for Palaptine to dissolve the senate, particularly since one must imagine that his drastic image change would curtail his involvement in politics. It must also bode poorly for the end of the series: "and now, my pupil, I fancy putting my feet up for twenty years".

Christiansen does bear a considerable resemblance to Mark Hamil, which is pretty smart.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:47 (twenty-one years ago)

why it takes twenty years for Palaptine to dissolve the senate

Well, maybe he was feeling somewhat relaxed.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:49 (twenty-one years ago)

the galactic senate is purely vestigial by the time of ep iv yeah?

― j blount (papa la bas), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:51 (twenty-one years ago)

i mean bureaucratic inertia's a helluva thing : NOW MADE CLEAR THE MESSAGE OF STAR WARS ALL ALONG - THX GEORGE LUCAS

― j blount (papa la bas), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:52 (twenty-one years ago)

The droids are there because George Lucas has no idea what makes films work.

Hang on wait wait, demanding that the animators take actors' facial expressions from one take and super-impose them onto another, etc needs more stunned awe. I mean, uh?

But that's classic George Lucas for you, he fucking hates actors and would do the whole thing in CGI if he could get away with it.

maybe, but how could you ever take anyone in this seriously? and how are they going to convince anyone old enough to give a shit about that sort of thing etc.

By "this", do you mean episode III in specific, or Star Wars in general? The first trilogy didn't exactly kill Harrison Ford's career, like.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:54 (twenty-one years ago)

robert altman's always claimed that stars wars ruined mark hamill

― j blount (papa la bas), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:55 (twenty-one years ago)

Portman seems to be riding it all out well enough. McGregor's in a slow slide down I think. Christensen, dead in water. McDiarmid's happy as fuck because all his SW money goes to the Almaida Theatre and a comfortable retirement and Christopher Lee's all "Ha! They can't cut my scenes in THIS trilogy closer!"

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:57 (twenty-one years ago)

the galactic senate is purely vestigial by the time of ep iv yeah?

Hmm...

"The Rebellion will continue to gain support in the Imperial Senate --"

"The Imperial Senate is no longer of any concern to us."

Etc. etc.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 21:58 (twenty-one years ago)

i don't know ned - timberlake's been pretty bad in the star wars flix but it's definitely raised his profile and being decent in other flix (i liked him as stephen glass) allows ppl to think 'ok maybe he's not so bad, maybe it's just lucas'. portman's recovering, you hafta figure she's relieved as hell this is over, ewan's maybe been hurt slightly - star wars seems so emblematic of what went wrong with him going hollywood - but he'll recover i bet: have you heard about the no doubt awesome bruckheimer flick he has coming out?

― j blount (papa la bas), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:02 (twenty-one years ago)

I thought Mark Hamill's accident was after the trilogy, but it turns out that it happened before Star Wars even came out! Haha and the first quote on the IMDB page is "I have a sneaking suspicion that if there were a way to make movies without actors, George (Lucas) would do it."

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:03 (twenty-one years ago)

Ewan McGregor: "Sorry about those Star Wars films, they were beneath my dignity as an actor. Hey, don't forget to go see Robots, out this weekend!"

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:04 (twenty-one years ago)

it's definitely raised his profile

What's been his most recent film anyway?

have you heard about the no doubt awesome bruckheimer flick he has coming out?

There's a descriptive phrase in this sentence that needs severe qualification.

Hahah, Andrew OTM. Ewan can't say shit about SW now.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:06 (twenty-one years ago)

yeah how could this be bad for christensen, who didn't have a career (besides a spot in a dumb canadian drama about mountain rangers or something) at all before SW? and he was pretty great as stephen glass, i must echo that.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:06 (twenty-one years ago)

FWIW, frame-by-frame breakdown at theforce.net

I admit I'm completely blanking on this Stephen Glass thing, what are you referring to?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:10 (twenty-one years ago)

and Christopher Lee's all "Ha! They can't cut my scenes in THIS trilogy closer!"

2010 newline: "...though everyone was surprised when, after a bitter personal argument with George Lucas, Christopher Lee's scenes in the Ultimate Final DVDXD(X) rerelease Episode II and III were replaced by digitally altered scenes of Ian McKellan in Richard III. McKellan's original dialogue was left unaltered."

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:10 (twenty-one years ago)

It was called "Shattered Glass", which is exactly the type of title that I'd ignore as Judd-bait if I didn't know what it was.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:11 (twenty-one years ago)

The droids are there because George Lucas has no idea what makes films work

or because he recognised what made The Hidden Fortress worked and wanted to replicate it in his own story, jus sayin like...

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:12 (twenty-one years ago)

oh yeah, i forgot that this flick is gunna have female Mon Calamari in it.

squid chicks!

― kingfish van vlasic pickles (Kingfish), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Ah, never mind, but honestly I've never heard of or didn't remember anything about the film until this second -- probably for the reason that Andrew described!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:12 (twenty-one years ago)

DID YOU NOT SEE THE DROIDS IN THE HIDDEN FORTESS? ONLY THERE FOR LIKE A SECOND BUT MAN THEY VALIDATED THE WHOLE THING

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:13 (twenty-one years ago)

i'm jus kiddin', you guys are alright

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Now you see, Stevem, over here I said this re: droids/Hidden Fortress:

But it's the beautiful venality of Tahei and Matakishi that makes the film the winner. For all the moments of reflection on the meaning of honor and the need to sacrifice in order to hold on to hope -- no disquisitions thankfully, except perhaps the climactic confrontation scene in the border jail and even there it's no sermon -- it's the two fish out of water, farmers turned soldiers for a lark, eternally bickering but still close friends, which get the first and last word. Lucas himself obviously transformed the types into C3PO and R2D2 for Star Wars but while there's plenty to connect the two duos, especially in terms of humor and frustration with their situation, Tahei and Matakishi aren't 'good' characters as such. They care about their situations to the extent that it benefits themselves; once they discover gold it's all a question of how they can get all or part of it, and when it comes down to it at the end, they quite happily agree to turn in the princess and general for a reward. Rebuffed on that front, they slouch across the border to bemoan their fate -- whereas a Hollywood variant would probably have them do something 'heroic' to rescue their comrades, Tahei and Matakishi shrug it all off. Everything turns out all right, of course, but that's nothing to do with them, and if it had, little of their roles would have made sense.

Star Wars would have been a different and potentially quite interesting film if Lucas had taken that approach with the droids, but would it have been better? Probably not, but then again some films, some works of art, are pretty damned hard to view with a critical lens if you've lived in them near constantly for most of your life.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:14 (twenty-one years ago)

ned you should see shattered glass. it was one of my favourite movies of last year (wait did it come out last year or 2003? well whatever year it came out) & i think you'd really like it.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:18 (twenty-one years ago)

haha - we reached the part of the star wars thread where hidden fortress gets mentioned

― j blount (papa la bas), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:19 (twenty-one years ago)

ONLY IF YOU SAY. ;-)

I admit I remember nothing of the actual case but a good movie could be made out of it. Title sure sucks, though.

Christensen's page is rather...light. If the next two movies are in pre-production and filming for Episode III was two years back, what's he been doing all this time?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:21 (twenty-one years ago)

Xpost.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:22 (twenty-one years ago)

he's been going round to the houses of people who slagged him online and kicking them in the nads

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:22 (twenty-one years ago)

That would take a bit.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Sven OTM, though I'm probably too hard on Lucas. He made the Star Wars films, which I would like to dismiss as "bit of luck + Harrison Ford", but can't honestly do so, and he also wrote Raiders Of The Lost Ark, so it's more likely that he had it but lost it.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:24 (twenty-one years ago)

ewan mcgregor IS lincoln six-echo. scarlett johansson IS jordan two-delta. olivia weston IS bad-ass lady. in: THE ISLAND. coming soon. summer 2005.

― j blount (papa la bas), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Eurgh. Can we talk about Robots instead?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:27 (twenty-one years ago)

robin williams is in robots.

― j blount (papa la bas), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:28 (twenty-one years ago)

that means 'no'.

― j blount (papa la bas), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:28 (twenty-one years ago)

I didn't say it would be a good and happy conversation.

Anyway, I had almost forgotten this beautiful thread:

http://ilx.p3r.net/thread.php?msgid=3476276

Calum = Jar Jar Binks

-- Aaron W (aaro...), April 17th, 2003

Chris V is Billy Dee.

-- Ally (mlescau...), April 17th, 2003

Etc.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:28 (twenty-one years ago)

What the, why link no work?

Rah

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:29 (twenty-one years ago)

http://img215.exs.cx/img215/9551/lucasmickey8jv.jpg

Lucas does a good story and good to have around the set for bits of advice, but never let him do the actual script.

― kingfish van vlasic pickles (Kingfish), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:30 (twenty-one years ago)

x-post

"and he also wrote Raiders Of The Lost Ark,"

Lucas did conceive the story, but wasn't it Lawrence Kasdan who wrote the actual Raiders screenplay?

― latebloomer: damn cheapskate satanists (latebloomer), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh man, I forgot about this comment of mine at that thread, which admittedly made me laugh:

I think at this point the one subcommander walking by in the far background of any random Death Star scene not only has an action figure, but several novels, his own comic series, and a fully dedicated fan website.

-- Ned Raggett (ne...), April 18th, 2003.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Kasdan & Leigh Brackett also did the actual script for Empire, too

― kingfish van vlasic pickles (Kingfish), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:33 (twenty-one years ago)

robots sucked.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Saturday, 12 March 2005 22:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Is it worse than Shark Tale?

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Saturday, 12 March 2005 23:32 (twenty-one years ago)

i didn't see no sharks tale.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Sunday, 13 March 2005 00:20 (twenty-one years ago)

parts of the trailer that look incontrovertibly bad-ass:

1) jedi posse tries to arrest palpatine. do you all think samuel jackson gets it?

2) emperor and yoda destroy the senate chambers

3) wookies!

― vahid (vahid), Sunday, 13 March 2005 00:56 (twenty-one years ago)

i'm glad we're all adult enough to admit this one's going to suck, too.

― vahid (vahid), Sunday, 13 March 2005 00:57 (twenty-one years ago)

My feeling is that it will suck, but probably less than the last one, and definitely less than The Phantom Menace, which is pretty difficult to beat in terms of suckitude. It'll at least be nice to see a lot of the Emperor and watch those jackass Jedis get their asses handed to them.

― Matthew C Perpetua (inca), Sunday, 13 March 2005 00:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Do you think that Lucas intended the audience to hate the protagonists of the first two films in the prequel trilogy so that it wouldn't be sad or traumatic for little kids to see them all die/lose in the last film?

― Matthew C Perpetua (inca), Sunday, 13 March 2005 01:00 (twenty-one years ago)

do you all think samuel jackson gets it?

I've been wondering about that. It does seem like it would be the case.

i'm glad we're all adult enough to admit this one's going to suck, too.

I am shruggingly resigned but still expectant. It's weird, I distinctly remember six years ago being *SO WOUND UP* for Ep I, like I could barely think or reflect on anything else for a few days beforehand. I actually won't exchange that memory for anything -- I didn't even feel that way waiting for the LOTR films, though they're my hands down favorites of recent years -- though it's certainly a bit sad that feeling is long gone for me. It's not TRAGIC and I'm not going to go "Oh well I'm above all that now" or any crap like that, because that would be lying to myself, it's just kinda sad.

Basically I'm looking forward to seeing how everything is meant to be tied together and what the final duel is like. And lots of political machinations.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 13 March 2005 01:01 (twenty-one years ago)

Samuel L Jackson knew his character was gunna die in this one when he signed on. he once said that his request to Lucas was for his character to go out in a blaze of glory, in some way that actually mattered, as opposed to just getting offed like a punk.

― kingfish van vlasic pickles (Kingfish), Sunday, 13 March 2005 01:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Well... wouldn't it matter to YOU?!

― Jimmy Mod Has Returned With Spices And Silks (ModJ), Sunday, 13 March 2005 02:07 (twenty-one years ago)

i.e. he didn't wanna just die by flying into the side of a sail barge then getting eaten by a vangina dentata

― kingfish van vlasic pickles (Kingfish), Sunday, 13 March 2005 02:17 (twenty-one years ago)

meanwhile,

http://img194.exs.cx/img194/5387/18dc06423el.jpg

― kingfish van vlasic pickles (Kingfish), Sunday, 13 March 2005 02:18 (twenty-one years ago)

That's so lame.

― Jimmy Mod Has Returned With Spices And Silks (ModJ), Sunday, 13 March 2005 02:19 (twenty-one years ago)

STORMTROOPERS DO NOT HAVE TATTOOS BECAUSE THEY ARE CLONES DUH!!!

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Sunday, 13 March 2005 02:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Lucasfilm in "overmerchandizing minor characters" shocker re Phantom:Maul::Revenge:Vader. (As he's only going to be in the last five minutes or so.)

― Girolamo Savonarola, Sunday, 13 March 2005 02:34 (twenty-one years ago)

look at the madness in those eyes

― vahid (vahid), Sunday, 13 March 2005 02:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Meanwhile

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Sunday, 13 March 2005 03:12 (twenty-one years ago)

1) jedi posse tries to arrest palpatine. do you all think samuel jackson gets it?

yeah but that looks like a quadruple-teaming of good guys vs. palpatine! just like when they double-teamed ol' christopher lee! and darth maul! hello george lucas it's the BAD GUYS who are supposed to get the unfair advantage!

― s1ocki (slutsky), Sunday, 13 March 2005 04:22 (twenty-one years ago)

i am so so happy about that scene because it shows that deep deep down in george lucas' head there may still be a lizard-brain-like lump of a few thousand brain cells that remembers how to effectively rip off cowboy and samurai movies.

also the jedi on the right with the big black bug eyes is totally freaky looking.

― vahid (vahid), Sunday, 13 March 2005 06:16 (twenty-one years ago)

actually he looks a little bit like a black lectroid

― vahid (vahid), Sunday, 13 March 2005 06:17 (twenty-one years ago)

WHY CAN'T FUCKING JIMMY SMITS GET KILLED INSTEAD??

― vahid (vahid), Sunday, 13 March 2005 06:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Barring a massive (and UNQUALIFIED, none of this "pretty good for a star wars movie" shit) outcry of surprised delight from film reviewers and fanboys alike; I'll see this movie in 2007 and dislike it then.

The second one ranks highly as one of the worst films I've ever seen.

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Sunday, 13 March 2005 06:44 (twenty-one years ago)

and yes, I am a fanboy spurned.

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Sunday, 13 March 2005 06:45 (twenty-one years ago)

The trailer looks great. I hated I and II and parts of VI like most everyone else, but I can't help but be a little bit hopeful about this one, as there's less room than ever to fuck around with the story.

― polyphonic (polyphonic), Sunday, 13 March 2005 07:52 (twenty-one years ago)

can we get some more outrage about lucas's double-teaming tendencies?

― s1ocki (slutsky), Sunday, 13 March 2005 08:21 (twenty-one years ago)

The second one ranks highly as one of the worst films I've ever seen.

OTM. Why does everyone think Episode I is the worst, when it doesn't feature George Lucas writing romantic dialogue?

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Sunday, 13 March 2005 09:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Because EP II had a gorgeous looking/sounding last 40 minutes (or so) -- except for Natalie Portman's roll-in-the-sand "I'm OK" scene and the dopey Yoda/Dooku battle. EP I had nothing - really - going for it. Darth Maul was teh corny.

― Jay Vee (Manon_70), Sunday, 13 March 2005 10:21 (twenty-one years ago)

one presumes General Grievous will uphold the Star Wars tradition of having a pretty cool deputy bad guy all too under-used in just the one movie (Maul, Jango Fett, Boba in ROTJ originally)

as has been mooted before, the romance dialogue in the second film sucks because Anakin and Padme suck at that kind of thing, as do people in real life often, it's not necessarily a gaping flaw in that context. and the dialogue in Star Wars movies was NEVER good, for the billionth time, so Lucas and co. have been quite consistent really (even in terms of pushing the technology at the time of production - tho obv. experimental CGI testing the tolerance of cynical adults)

there's nothing more tedious anymore than throwaway 'these movies suck' comments. i'm gonna enjoy the closure anyway, ten years of this now (never considered/thought about the prequels before that).

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Sunday, 13 March 2005 12:04 (twenty-one years ago)

I am very excited about the new film now, after seeing the extended trailer thingie on T4 this morning!

The Jedi Posse scene looked pretty cool.

I think I may take annual leave on the day it come's out, I mean there's never going to be another first day of Star Wars again!

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 13 March 2005 12:55 (twenty-one years ago)

I thought all the Jedi's except Yoda and Obi-Kwon were gonna be dead by the end of the film?

It'll probably end with Obi-Kwon handing over the little baby Luke to Uncle Owen on Tationne (sp)...and then like, a double sun set, as Obi Kwon trudges of to his hermitage.

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 13 March 2005 13:13 (twenty-one years ago)

because Anakin and Padme suck at that kind of thing, as do people in real life often, it's not necessarily a gaping flaw in that context

When I go to see Star wars, I am not going to see a Dogme film.

Anyway, it's anything but throwaway, my reactions to Eps I&II were very important at the time.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Sunday, 13 March 2005 13:51 (twenty-one years ago)

so the dialogue is SUPPOSED to be bad?

― s1ocki (slutsky), Sunday, 13 March 2005 18:24 (twenty-one years ago)

That's some impressive apologism right there.

― polyphonic (polyphonic), Sunday, 13 March 2005 18:38 (twenty-one years ago)

the dialogue isn't necess. supposed to be bad, but it's sort of 'realistic' when you think about it, and certainly consistent with the rest of the series.

it's more fun to defend...

― Alan Hansen (blueski), Sunday, 13 March 2005 19:19 (twenty-one years ago)

as for the double-teaming, come on... there are only two sith in the whole universe against a bunch of jedi!! besides they probably didn't know the chancellor even owned a lightsaber until that point... i wonder how yoda escapes the emperor (haha, i am such a sucker)

― dave k, Sunday, 13 March 2005 19:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Plus, the Sith has a whole army of clones and stuff now. The Jedi hadn't really done much for years anyhow.

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 13 March 2005 19:46 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm kind of impressed that the fanboy allure of the universe is still such that people are going to these movies as if they have any expectations at all, I mean by the time Ep.2 came out we were going to theaters to see that in exactly the same mindset as if we were going to see "Reign Of Fire" in the theater (which we did)!

Still kind of confusing as to what exactly it is that the first trilogy has(had, fuck a special ed) that these three are completely missing, besides Han Solo and a lack of computational imaging horsepower. That might be all there is to it, to be honest.

― TOMBOT, Sunday, 13 March 2005 20:08 (twenty-one years ago)

I guess we're not just kids anymore, and the CGI thing - with great power comes great responsibility.

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 13 March 2005 20:45 (twenty-one years ago)

I THINK THAT SUMS IT UP NICELY, ACTUALLY.

― latebloomer: damn cheapskate satanists (latebloomer), Sunday, 13 March 2005 20:46 (twenty-one years ago)

I DID NOT MEAN THAT TO BE TYPED IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS, DAMN MY KEYBOARD

― latebloomer: damn cheapskate satanists (latebloomer), Sunday, 13 March 2005 20:47 (twenty-one years ago)

JEL OTM

― latebloomer: damn cheapskate satanists (latebloomer), Sunday, 13 March 2005 20:48 (twenty-one years ago)

double-teaming is still wrong.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Sunday, 13 March 2005 20:54 (twenty-one years ago)

I read somewhere that Harrison Ford took on the role of directing of the actors in the first three, since Lucas is, well.... he's not much better now, is he?

Last night I watched a bit of Minority Report on TV and was struck how that movie is utterly the antithesis of the prequels... Sci-fi with effects, but totally character-driven, good acting (yes even from Cruise and Ferrell), great directing, etc. etc. And then I got even more pissed off at Lucas.

So, can Lucas get killed off in this one? I mean, that would be dark and would end things with a bang.

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Sunday, 13 March 2005 21:13 (twenty-one years ago)

I've had another thought...if I were a kid and I was playing Star Wars with my pals, which character would I want to be from ep 1 and 2? I can't think of an answer. I mean for 4-6 it's obvious, that you want to be Han, and you don't mind being Chewie or Lando, hell you'll even be Luke if you have to.

So, perhaps there is a fault with the characters in this new trilogy:

Anakin: annoying but innocent brat, whiny teenager. Ther was never much sign of him being the "good man who was seduced by the darkside". The change should have been sudden and dramatic - not slow and obvious, maybe?

Obi-Kwon: he's okay, not really that exciting. Just sort of a plodding Jedi jobs-worth. He needs more passion, hopefully he'll get his shit together in episode 3.

Jar Jar: the sidekick, but again you totally wouldn't be him.

Padme: She's okay.

And then there are loads of support characters, and random monsters. Yeah, Mace is cool but he's not in it enough.

It just lacks the core set of characters of the original series.

I'm still looking forward to it.

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 13 March 2005 21:25 (twenty-one years ago)

But then I guess we all knew that Anakin becomes Darth, there can be no surprise. And therein lies the crux of the problem.

(I wish I thought this much about other more important areas of my life)

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 13 March 2005 21:27 (twenty-one years ago)

And there is no SHIP. No major iconic ship.

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 13 March 2005 21:30 (twenty-one years ago)

The S.S. Hubris.

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Sunday, 13 March 2005 22:37 (twenty-one years ago)

jel, why do you keep writing it Obi-Kwon?

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Sunday, 13 March 2005 22:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Obikwon the Chef

― latebloomer: damn cheapskate satanists (latebloomer), Sunday, 13 March 2005 22:54 (twenty-one years ago)

re iconic characters and ships, this will at least give episodes IV to VI something over I-III, given how the first three have more ambitious set-pieces visually, wider range/exposure of locations and are generally 'busier'. normally each sequel would be trying to 'go one better' in these departments. episodes IV to VI can't so the 'improvements' are made through better characters, character interplay and such. mind you episode III's opening shot may not even surpass episode IV's for impact, tho i've heard the opening battle and what they do with cameras is spectacular.

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Sunday, 13 March 2005 22:57 (twenty-one years ago)

What's always annoyed me is that the technology looks so much more futuristic in I-III (space craft, computer read-outs and such) than it does in IV-VI.

― scotstvo (scotstvo), Monday, 14 March 2005 01:32 (twenty-one years ago)

but it's pretty easy to say they still had all that technology in IV-VI, you just don't see it as much what with no Coruscant etc.

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Monday, 14 March 2005 02:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah the blatant anachronism of Darth Vader's torso button display really stands out painfully in this one, if you were gonna change so much dumb shit in the special editions to match up with the new movies then why not at least give him some kind of THX BLU-RAY OLED readout on his gut instead of those fucking BIG RED AND SLIGHTLY OFF-WHITE PLASTIC SQUARES, BEEP BEEP I AM MORE MACHINE THAN MAN, fish, plankton, sea greens, and protein from the sea, MY MASTER.

― TOMBOT, Monday, 14 March 2005 02:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Mebbe Palpatine axed the health care system to fight the Clone Wars and all they had left was this lumpy old 'it was designed for this perverted squidillionaire from Zestulon Feev who liked black' portobacta suit.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 14 March 2005 02:26 (twenty-one years ago)

all the costumes and gear in episodes IV-Vi is kitsch ironic retro chic duuuuude, i mean for them as well as us

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Monday, 14 March 2005 02:46 (twenty-one years ago)

otm! that would've been way better. my feeling (pre-prequel) was always that he was the exemplary jedi, the best of the best, kind of a lucifer thing

― s1ocki (slutsky), Monday, 14 March 2005 04:22 (twenty-one years ago)

my (pre-emptive) feeling is that "revenge of the sith" should have been episode 1

― vahid (vahid), Monday, 14 March 2005 04:49 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.cbsnews.com/sections/60minutes/main3415.shtml

Lucas was on 60 Minutes tonight

― kingfish van pickles (Kingfish), Monday, 14 March 2005 07:10 (twenty-one years ago)

http://wwwimage.cbsnews.com/images/2005/03/10/image679320x.jpg

― kingfish van pickles (Kingfish), Monday, 14 March 2005 07:11 (twenty-one years ago)

http://img142.exs.cx/img142/3461/ayla3kk.jpg

― kingfish van pickles (Kingfish), Monday, 14 March 2005 07:16 (twenty-one years ago)

http://img32.exs.cx/img32/4381/windu3vc.jpg

― kingfish van pickles (Kingfish), Monday, 14 March 2005 07:17 (twenty-one years ago)

In the "WETA? What's WETA? I have no idea what you're talking about." dept...

Lucas and his wizards at ILM, like animation supervisor Rob Coleman, are leading a revolution in moviemaking. "I think the biggest thing is that we're now doing Yoda," Coleman tells Stahl. "When you were here last, Yoda was a rubber puppet."

For "Episode I" in 1999, Yoda was operated by puppeteer Frank Oz, of "Muppets" fame, just as he had been back in the ‘80s. But now, Yoda has been digitized.

"He's a supporting actor, 100 percent digital," says Coleman.

Fifteen different computer animators helped create Yoda: his body, his clothes, his hair, and that face. Coleman showed Stahl how this was done.

Some of the human actors in this movie also have digital doubles. "I've got a little sequence here where we have a fight with the real guys having a fight," says Coleman, showing the sequence to Stahl.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 14 March 2005 07:20 (twenty-one years ago)

"The point is, like if you paint your house white and somebody comes over, 'Well that should be a green house.' Well, fine, but I wanted to paint it white. I don’t think there was anything wrong with painting it white. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with me for painting it white. Maybe it should be a green house, but I didn’t want it to be a green house. I wanted it to be a white house.”

― vahid (vahid), Monday, 14 March 2005 07:20 (twenty-one years ago)

http://wwwimage.cbsnews.com/images/2005/03/10/image679318x.jpg

"WHY did I agree to be in Robots?"

"Whatever, dude."

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 14 March 2005 07:21 (twenty-one years ago)

http://wwwimage.cbsnews.com/images/2005/03/10/image679348.jpg

"Sensing now in asteroid fields Star Wars sequences will always be."

"That's nice. Now if you excuse me I gotta adjust my lightsaber here..."

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 14 March 2005 07:23 (twenty-one years ago)

a WHITE house?

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Monday, 14 March 2005 09:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Somebody give me one reason why I SHOULDN'T make a comic collage of stills from this crapfest and caption them with Talking Heads lyrics

― TOMBOT, Monday, 14 March 2005 15:09 (twenty-one years ago)

haha

http://img32.exs.cx/img32/4381/windu3vc.jpg

PSYCHO KILLER!
QU'EST-CE QUE C'EST?
FA FA FA FA FA FA FA FA FAR FAR BETTER

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Monday, 14 March 2005 15:14 (twenty-one years ago)

THIS IS NOT MY BEAUTIFUL WIFE

http://img142.exs.cx/img142/3461/ayla3kk.jpg

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Monday, 14 March 2005 15:14 (twenty-one years ago)

(please do the comic collage Tom - i haven't completely killed the joke already i hope)

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Monday, 14 March 2005 15:15 (twenty-one years ago)

I echo this comic collage request.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 14 March 2005 15:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Somebody give me one reason why I SHOULDN'T make a comic collage of stills from this crapfest and caption them with Talking Heads lyrics

No, go for it. It will be as good (if not better than) as the Alexander thread.

― Leon the Fatboy (Ex Leon), Monday, 14 March 2005 15:19 (twenty-one years ago)

Heheheh. A fine standard to live up to.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 14 March 2005 15:22 (twenty-one years ago)

http://wwwimage.cbsnews.com/images/2005/03/10/image679320x.jpg

X-MEN 3: The Dark Phoenix Saga (The Hot Chick Remix)

― BARMS, Monday, 14 March 2005 15:58 (twenty-one years ago)

Scottish Widows get serious

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Monday, 14 March 2005 15:59 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm never sure how Ben Kenobi's name is spelt!

Once in a lifetime, Jedi's six feet undergroun...

― jel -- (jel), Monday, 14 March 2005 17:48 (twenty-one years ago)

OBEY THE DARK POWER OF CHILDHOOD BRANDING

I find this whole "I know this movie is going to suck but I MUST SEE IT" POV rather sad and disturbing (and I don't mean just on this thread, I mean in general this seems to be the Star Wars "fan" mantra at this point - I got it from several friends just this weekend)

― Shakey Mo Collier, Monday, 14 March 2005 17:59 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't think it's going to SUCK per se, just that will never meet the heavy burden of expectation. It won't recapture lost feelings, it won't feel new and exciting. It can't really be as good, as you know essentially what's going to happen. It's like getting a lego kit for your birthday, but someone has already put it together. Perhaps, there is no one to blame?

― jel -- (jel), Monday, 14 March 2005 18:08 (twenty-one years ago)

uhhh I think George Lucas is pretty clearly the one to blame. Considering that he just fires whoever disagrees with him (like the production editor who refused to do the "facial expression" transfer thing I alluded to above - subsequently fired, went to work for Peter Jackson, and won an Oscar).

― Shakey Mo Collier, Monday, 14 March 2005 18:20 (twenty-one years ago)

George is kinda being turned into a Mike Love figure. I will have to start defending him!

― jel -- (jel), Monday, 14 March 2005 18:21 (twenty-one years ago)

at this point, he'll be lucky if he even manages to recreate the magic of "Willow", much less "Star Wars".

― Shakey Mo Collier, Monday, 14 March 2005 18:24 (twenty-one years ago)

like the production editor who refused to do the "facial expression" transfer thing I alluded to above - subsequently fired, went to work for Peter Jackson, and won an Oscar

*arched eyebrow* Hmmm...so call me curious, but who is this? (Answer via googleproofing as needed.)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 14 March 2005 18:33 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't remember the guy's name. This anecdote was related to me by my old friend/bandmate and ILM film editor L0R3L31 D4VID (is that gooleproofed? I dunno how that shit works)

― Shakey Mo Collier, Monday, 14 March 2005 18:40 (twenty-one years ago)

Ned's link to the new trailer doesn't work anymore. Does anyone have another one?

― Richard K (Richard K), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 08:21 (twenty-one years ago)

http://movies.channel.aol.com/feature/starwars/trailer.adp

― Girolamo Savonarola, Tuesday, 15 March 2005 09:00 (twenty-one years ago)

“It’s not like the old Star Wars,” Lucas told theatre owners at the ShoWest convention.
“This one’s a little bit more emotional. We like to describe it as Titanic in space. It’s a tearjerker.”

― Huk-L, Friday, 18 March 2005 14:40 (twenty-one years ago)

We like to describe it as Titanic in space.

And with a single sentence, Lucas sends my desire to see the film crashing down to zero.

― lock robster (robster), Friday, 18 March 2005 14:45 (twenty-one years ago)

otm

― Dave B (daveb), Friday, 18 March 2005 14:48 (twenty-one years ago)

It gets worse:

“Obviously, fans would love to see a movie about Darth Vader running around killing people,” said Lucas, who also was on hand to receive a “galactic-achievement award” from ShoWest organizers.
“I’m not telling that story, and I’m not interested in that. That’s not what the movie is.”

― Huk-L, Friday, 18 March 2005 14:49 (twenty-one years ago)

It's about Anakin running around and killing people! (As the trailer shows.) Woo!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 18 March 2005 14:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Titanic In Space = best film ever, if the ship was disintegrating as a result of MechaGodzilla

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Friday, 18 March 2005 14:52 (twenty-one years ago)

So he knew what the right thing to do was, he just didn't want to do the right thing.

xpost

― Huk-L, Friday, 18 March 2005 14:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Shh, Huk, you're giving it away!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 18 March 2005 14:53 (twenty-one years ago)

ihttp://www.symphonyspace.org/releases/photos/66/do_the_right_thing.jpg

― Jimmy Mod Has Returned With Spices And Silks (ModJ), Friday, 18 March 2005 15:04 (twenty-one years ago)

Giancarlo Esposito love.

― Girolamo Savonarola, Friday, 18 March 2005 15:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Word. His Michael Giardello was the only good late-addition to the Homicide roster.

― Huk-L, Friday, 18 March 2005 15:35 (twenty-one years ago)

"Anakin I want you to paint me wearing this lightsaber. Only this lightsaber..."

― carson dial (carson dial), Friday, 18 March 2005 18:00 (twenty-one years ago)

http://community.spacecast.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=2;t=002495;p=

― kingfish van pickles (Kingfish), Sunday, 20 March 2005 23:49 (twenty-one years ago)

young boba looks so dumb

― charleston charge (chaki), Monday, 21 March 2005 00:03 (twenty-one years ago)

Whoever they got playing younger Governor Tarkin looks pretty much like a younger Peter Cushing, I'm impressed! Doubtless a fair amount of makeup helping, though.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 21 March 2005 00:08 (twenty-one years ago)

have their been any, whats the word 'screengrabs' of the last shot. the last shot is going to be a big deal i keep hearing.

― piscesboy, Monday, 21 March 2005 00:28 (twenty-one years ago)

That's gotta be the cutest couple I've ever seen! The first one looks more like a dog, mind you.

It's a furry convention you half-wit!

Jawa Porn has a large following in the outer rim, I've heard.

Oh no...oh my...

― Ian Riese-Moraine. Sweeter than a lorry load of white Toblerones. (Eastern Mantr, Monday, 21 March 2005 00:46 (twenty-one years ago)

WHAT THE HIGH HOLY FUCK??? Star Wars 3-D!!!
http://chud.com/news/1962

― Huk-L, Monday, 21 March 2005 15:04 (twenty-one years ago)

Comedy gold

― Girolamo Savonarola, Wednesday, 30 March 2005 10:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Haha most of that made we want to see the film, but you know it's going to be about that 108 minutes of stilted dialogue.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 30 March 2005 11:13 (twenty-one years ago)

The first two links at the bottom under Also See aren't too bad either.

― Girolamo Savonarola, Wednesday, 30 March 2005 15:59 (twenty-one years ago)

"Screeners report that this character fires a barrage of laser bolts, then pauses while the red spot in his chest lights up. When the protagonist shoots the red spot, the enemy attacks with another barrage, moving around the room in a repeating pattern, until the red spot becomes vunerable again. Rumors state that if the red dot is hit three times he will explode."

― Jimmy Mod Has Returned With Spices And Silks (ModJ), Wednesday, 30 March 2005 16:06 (twenty-one years ago)

at least we can indirectly praise Lucas for the occurrence of the phrase Groinfire Tutu

― Sven Basted (blueski), Wednesday, 30 March 2005 16:24 (twenty-one years ago)

shh...

― Girolamo Savonarola, Saturday, 9 April 2005 22:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Not perfect but this is a lot better from Williams than I was expecting after all this. Track 6 starts out like some dark ambient drone thing! Tracklisting for reference.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 9 April 2005 23:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, "Palpatine's Teachings" is pretty creepy. If I ever do a haunted house thing, I want to use that and segue it into "Hamburger Lady."

― Matthew C Perpetua (inca), Sunday, 10 April 2005 04:13 (twenty-one years ago)

all i got from Girolamo's link was a web hosting page - what gives?

― $V£N! (blueski), Sunday, 10 April 2005 10:56 (twenty-one years ago)

I gotta come clean and say, I'm very unimpressed with this one's soundtrack.

― Girolamo Savonarola, Sunday, 10 April 2005 11:20 (twenty-one years ago)

I agree pretty much. It sounds so-so. The soundtracks for the first three had way catchier songs, stuff that's burned into my memory forever. This is just functional bombast.

― Matthew C Perpetua (inca), Sunday, 10 April 2005 13:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Like, if you asked me to, I could totally sing "The Asteroid Fields" to you.

― Matthew C Perpetua (inca), Sunday, 10 April 2005 13:44 (twenty-one years ago)

i think you got your next fluxblog post there, matt!

― s1ocki (slutsky), Sunday, 10 April 2005 14:33 (twenty-one years ago)

http://right-thoughts.us/library/starwars3/

― charleston charge (chaki), Wednesday, 13 April 2005 22:09 (twenty-one years ago)

Okay, this is about as spoiled as it gets, short of seeing the movie.

― Girolamo Savonarola, Wednesday, 13 April 2005 23:50 (twenty-one years ago)

Has anyone else read the novelization of this yet?

― Greig (treefell), Thursday, 14 April 2005 07:43 (twenty-one years ago)

ANAKIN jumps and flips onto OBI- WAN's platform. The fighting continues again until OBI-WAN jumps toward the safety of the black sandy edge of the lava river. He yells at Anakin.
OBI-WAN: It's over, Anakin. I have the high ground.
ANAKIN: You underestimate my power!

OBI-WAN: Don't try it.

― lock robster (robster), Thursday, 14 April 2005 10:52 (twenty-one years ago)

OBI-WAN: It's over, Anakin. I have the high ground.

ANAKIN: You underestimate my power!

OBI-WAN: Don't try it.

ANAKIN follows, and OBI-WAN cuts his young apprentice at the knees, then cuts off his left arm in the blink of an eye. ANAKIN tumbles down the embankment and rolls to a stop near the edge of the lava.

ANAKIN struggles to pull himself up the embankment with his mechanical hand. His thin leather glove has been burned off. He keeps sliding down in the black sand.

ANAKIN: I'm invincible!

OBI-WAN: You're a loony.

ANAKIN: The Sith always triumphs! Have at you! Come on then.

OBI-WAN: Come C3PO

ANAKIN: Oh, oh, I see, running away then. You Jedi bastards! Come back here and take what's coming to you. I'll bite your legs off!

― Dave B (daveb), Thursday, 14 April 2005 11:02 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.millenniumfalcon.com/phpbb/viewtopic.php?t=4051

beware! mon calamari tittays! several spoiler pics, too!

― kingfish maximum overdrunk (Kingfish), Friday, 22 April 2005 04:20 (twenty-one years ago)

http://img245.echo.cx/img245/3517/squiddytittys2ef.jpg

― kingfish maximum overdrunk (Kingfish), Friday, 22 April 2005 05:05 (twenty-one years ago)

"They're...They're MAMMALS ?!!?"

(aieeeeee!!)

― Jay Vee (Manon_70), Friday, 22 April 2005 07:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Kevin Smith loves it (spoilers ahoy!):
http://www.newsaskew.com/blog/?p=38#comments

― Huk-L, Thursday, 28 April 2005 15:01 (twenty-one years ago)

This is my favorite part of the whole thing
iihttp://www.ytmnd.com/site_data//54000/54198/image.gif

― TOMBOT, Thursday, 28 April 2005 16:44 (twenty-one years ago)

This is my favorite part of the whole thing
http://www.ytmnd.com/site_data//54000/54198/image.gif

― TOMBOT, Thursday, 28 April 2005 16:45 (twenty-one years ago)

hmm

― s1ocki (slutsky), Thursday, 5 May 2005 19:05 (twenty-one years ago)

did slocki see Sith?

― Huk-L, Thursday, 5 May 2005 19:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Two weeks to go. I want blood.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 5 May 2005 19:16 (twenty-one years ago)

omg that burger king thing rules

― j blount (papa la bas), Thursday, 5 May 2005 19:16 (twenty-one years ago)

I saw a Darth Vader Slurpee cup at 7-11 yesterday and my heart went BOOM!

― Huk-L, Thursday, 5 May 2005 19:19 (twenty-one years ago)

darth v interpol slurpees

― Mr. Harvey Weinstein (mr harvey weinstein), Thursday, 5 May 2005 19:20 (twenty-one years ago)

Carlos D is scarier than Vader.

― Leon Federline (Ex Leon), Thursday, 5 May 2005 19:36 (twenty-one years ago)

hhehehe he has a wee little crown...

― Jimmy Mod Knows You Eat Your Own Farts (ModJ), Thursday, 5 May 2005 20:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Carlos D is scarier than Vader

That herpes saber can take out a lot very quickly.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 5 May 2005 20:51 (twenty-one years ago)

I felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of voices suddenly cried out for Valtrex and were suddenly silenced.

― Leon Federline (Ex Leon), Thursday, 5 May 2005 20:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Who knew that Ewan would be so affected?

My chief overriding concern right now are the claims that it is dark from the likes of Spielberg. Spielberg claims Temple of Doom was dark. I think not.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 5 May 2005 21:06 (twenty-one years ago)

It's fucking dark, from the looks of it. Palpatine personally kills three of the four Jedi in Tom's animation himself; Anakin cuts off Mace's hands and Palp throws him out the window. Anakin also cuts off Dooku's head, slaughters all the Jedi younglings, and all the Trade Federation plot device people. The stormtroopers surround and kill off most of the Jedi in firing circles, Anakin force chokes Amidala to death, and then has all three of his remaining limbs get chopped off before being dunked into lava.

That sounds at least fairly well browned to me.

― Girolamo Savonarola, Thursday, 5 May 2005 21:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Hm, I guess I better start taking this thread title a bit more seriously.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 5 May 2005 21:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Chopping off Anakin's limbs isn't dark, it makes me think of Monty Python and the Holy Grail!

― KeefW (kmw), Thursday, 5 May 2005 21:18 (twenty-one years ago)

mmmrmmrmrmffff

― s1ocki (slutsky), Thursday, 5 May 2005 21:20 (twenty-one years ago)

I do like the idea of Hayden saying he'll bite Ewan's legs off.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 5 May 2005 21:21 (twenty-one years ago)

Hehe

― KeefW (kmw), Thursday, 5 May 2005 21:22 (twenty-one years ago)

personally all that dismemberment stuff sounds profoundly silly, like Internet Ninja fiction (and yes, Monty Python). "Darkness" = how events are portrayed, not the events themselves.

― Shakey Mo Collier, Thursday, 5 May 2005 21:42 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm trying to see if Slocki can speak but Lucas's force power appears to be strangling him.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 5 May 2005 21:43 (twenty-one years ago)

he saw it today, but the contract he signed forbids him to reveal how badly it sucked.

― jones (actual), Thursday, 5 May 2005 22:15 (twenty-one years ago)

He could of course sign out and use a logged off identity...

― Bender, Thursday, 5 May 2005 23:45 (twenty-one years ago)

Spoiler-stuffed geek review over at theforce.net, but I'll say this much, this is promising:

If you were to ask me to rank all of the films, I’d probably put them in the following order from best to worst: The Empire Strikes Back, A New Hope, Revenge of the Sith, Return of the Jedi, Attack of the Clones, The Phantom Menace. (Ask me again later and I’ll probably change my mind, but this is it at the moment.)

The movie features a lot of great action as you would expect, and that’s always been the strengths of the prequels. It takes everything that was good about Attack of the Clones and reduces everything that was bad about it. You have cool battles, Yoda in a lot of action, more cool bad guys, and no Jar Jar (well, at least no Jar Jar dialogue). That being said, you also still have some bad dialogue, slow scenes between the action sequences, and cheesy romantic moments. Fortunately none of these weak points drags the film down as much as they did in Attack of the Clones.

Hmmm

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 6 May 2005 01:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh my god, "slow scenes between the action sequences"!! Who would want those??! I just wanna see lightsabre decapitations!!

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Friday, 6 May 2005 08:37 (twenty-one years ago)

I really couldn't care less about seeing 'Yoda in a lot of action'. who really gives a fuck?

― Ste (Fuzzy), Friday, 6 May 2005 08:44 (twenty-one years ago)

That puppet sure can fight!

― Huk-L, Friday, 6 May 2005 14:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Also, I think the "cheesy romantic moments" in Attack of the Clones were perfectly fine. It's fantasy for chrissakes, not Woody Allen!

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Friday, 6 May 2005 14:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Dude, not a puppet, a muppet. In other words, a mop and a puppet. A CG mop and puppet.

― Girolamo Savonarola, Friday, 6 May 2005 14:55 (twenty-one years ago)

oh, well, never mind then.

― Huk-L, Friday, 6 May 2005 14:56 (twenty-one years ago)

The idea of Woody Allen being a good example of non-fantasy film romance is pretty hilarious to me.

― Matthew C Perpetua (inca), Friday, 6 May 2005 15:22 (twenty-one years ago)

It's gonna be better than Hitchhikers. I just know it.

Oh, and I looked at the book, and the film ends just like thought it would!

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 6 May 2005 15:38 (twenty-one years ago)

There's a new hope!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 6 May 2005 15:40 (twenty-one years ago)

But I don't think my heart could take Natalie P death :(

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 6 May 2005 15:41 (twenty-one years ago)

His name is Benedict.

xpost

― Huk-L, Friday, 6 May 2005 15:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Happy geek moment -- and how will they explain the line from Leia talking about her 'real mother' if she's barely alive when real mom passes on?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 6 May 2005 15:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Coz Leia is a Jedi, she'll have that sort of I didn't really know her but I felt her soul vibe, or something.

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 6 May 2005 15:44 (twenty-one years ago)

And when does Obi Wan become General?

― Huk-L, Friday, 6 May 2005 15:45 (twenty-one years ago)

Perhaps he got a battlefield promotion fighting the Quanzors of Zheli Farb.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 6 May 2005 15:45 (twenty-one years ago)

And why does Darth look so stumpy?

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 6 May 2005 15:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Didn't Leia always figure Bail's missus was her real Mum or something?

― $V£N! (blueski), Friday, 6 May 2005 15:48 (twenty-one years ago)

When does Bail become king so that Leia can be princess?

― Huk-L, Friday, 6 May 2005 15:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, she was Leia Oregana! Bail's wife dies early too :(

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 6 May 2005 15:50 (twenty-one years ago)

Dude, it'll all get explained in Star Wars: the live action series!

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 6 May 2005 15:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Also, are they going to waste my time explaining why C3PO doesn't remember that DARTH VADER is his father too?

― Huk-L, Friday, 6 May 2005 15:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Memory dump, read upthread.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 6 May 2005 15:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Don't confuse the issue with references.

― Huk-L, Friday, 6 May 2005 15:52 (twenty-one years ago)

What will future generations make of this thread?

We had so much potential.

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 6 May 2005 15:54 (twenty-one years ago)

What are you saying?

Bail becomes King Of Alderaan or something right?

Remind me how Antilles fits into it.

Obi-Wan has memory erased as well (why he forgets he pwned a droid), but only as a result of addiction to Jawa Juice (as explained in Book #723: Obi-Wan And The Quest For The 24 Hour Off-License)

― $V£N! (blueski), Friday, 6 May 2005 16:13 (twenty-one years ago)

I preferred Book #724: Obi-Wan and Kumar Kumar Binks Go To Anchorhead

― Huk-L, Friday, 6 May 2005 16:40 (twenty-one years ago)

Obi-Wan has memory erased as well (why he forgets he pwned a droid)

Okay, I'm sure this has been explained decades ago, but why were Luke's aunt and uncle in the market for droids? In episodes II and IV they appear to be farmers/gleaners. I never could figure out how they could use droids.

― j.lu (j.lu), Friday, 6 May 2005 18:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Looks like the droids were the ones who actually went out and screwed around with the moisture vaporators. (Doesn't Uncle Owen say something about needing a droid who can handle that in the original film?)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 6 May 2005 18:29 (twenty-one years ago)

They were moisture farmers and they needed R2 to talk to the vaporators, and they needed 3PO to talk to R2.
DUH.

― Huk-L, Friday, 6 May 2005 18:42 (twenty-one years ago)

plus droids are the tatooine version of real dolls. DUH.

― j blount (papa la bas), Friday, 6 May 2005 18:46 (twenty-one years ago)

variety rave

hollywood reporter rave

― j blount (papa la bas), Friday, 6 May 2005 18:48 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm gonna go see Sith at the motherfucking Drive In, just like I saw Empire when I was 3.

― Huk-L, Friday, 6 May 2005 18:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Did Slocki die or something?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 6 May 2005 18:55 (twenty-one years ago)

Jimmy Smits is Bail Organa?

― jocelyn (Jocelyn), Friday, 6 May 2005 18:55 (twenty-one years ago)

How come some people in Star Wars have noun-verbs for first names (Bail, Wedge), and some people have real first names (Luke, Dirk)?

― Huk-L, Friday, 6 May 2005 19:00 (twenty-one years ago)

mmmmMMMRMRPPFFFmmm

― s1ocki (slutsky), Friday, 6 May 2005 19:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Mace.

― jocelyn (Jocelyn), Friday, 6 May 2005 19:02 (twenty-one years ago)

don't expect any miracles.

― someone who loves you, Friday, 6 May 2005 19:03 (twenty-one years ago)

THANK you. I shall bear it in mind.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 6 May 2005 19:08 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.dvdanswers.com/images/screenshots/too_little_too_late1_copy0.jpg

― someone who loves you, Friday, 6 May 2005 19:25 (twenty-one years ago)

apparently dvdanswers.com does not love hotlinking, tho.

― kingfish maximum overdrunk (Kingfish), Saturday, 7 May 2005 03:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Someone refresh my memory... Who the heck is Bail Oregana? Is he in the movies?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Saturday, 7 May 2005 13:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, he's the Senator from Alderaan, Leia's adopted dad, and is played in Attack and Sith by Jimmy Smits. His role in Attack consisted of about two lines and a walk-on at the end, so I don't blame you for forgetting him, especially since I think he wasn't identified onscreen by another character!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 7 May 2005 13:19 (twenty-one years ago)

Leia was a princess in the original movies, so will this senator become the king or something? Will he stage a coup?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Saturday, 7 May 2005 13:24 (twenty-one years ago)

This is one of those Great Mysteries. (Alternately, maybe it's be something like 'well your real mother was a queen and all...' -- keep in mind Leia clearly knows she was adopted.)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 7 May 2005 13:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Does she? I remember no such reference... (She talks about her dead mother, but at that point it is assumed it's the Queen of Alderan she's referring to). Also, in the original movies everyone refers her to as "princess", and if everyone knew who her real mom was, wouldn't Darth Vader too?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Saturday, 7 May 2005 13:34 (twenty-one years ago)

I guess it's kinda silly talking about the disrepancies in the movies anyway, you wouldn't know where to start... Does anyone know, for example, whether it is explained in episode 3 why technology suddenly takes a huge leap backwards within 30 years?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Saturday, 7 May 2005 13:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Dark Ages and all. Maybe the funding for technological upkeep ran out because all the Stormtroopers needed to be fed.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 7 May 2005 13:44 (twenty-one years ago)

(Also -- and god help me, there must be places where they do this *all day* w/r/t these films -- if you want to think of it in these terms, the Rebel Alliance is supposed to be the underdogs and all, and in a classic guerrilla war, if you're not being supplied by an outside source comparable to the power you're struggling against, you're going to be working more often than not with outdated or at least older technology, weapons, etc. while your more well off enemies get to figure out ways to make muffins cook with neutrinos.)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 7 May 2005 13:48 (twenty-one years ago)

but ALL technology seems to have taken a leap back! my guess is that ultimate piece of pork-barrel politics, the death star, is what diverted much-need money away from the upkeep of coruscant.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Saturday, 7 May 2005 15:13 (twenty-one years ago)

You do not understand the power of the darkside (ie it's all cloaks and olde-worldy)

― jel -- (jel), Saturday, 7 May 2005 15:48 (twenty-one years ago)

Maybe king is just another elected position on Alderaan like it was on wherever the hell Amidala was from. That would explain Bail becoming king, Leia being Princess, etc.

― mike h. (mike h.), Saturday, 7 May 2005 15:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Maybe, it was like, everything's screwed now, I'll just call myself King to make me feel a bit better?

― jel -- (jel), Saturday, 7 May 2005 15:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Do it. I have!

― Jimmy Mod, Sultan of Sexxitime (ModJ), Saturday, 7 May 2005 15:53 (twenty-one years ago)

my guess is that ultimate piece of pork-barrel politics, the death star, is what diverted much-need money away from the upkeep of coruscant.

We really must beware here, we are on the verge of recreating Clerks in ILXoria, and this is a fate worse than death. (I don't wake up every day saying, "Ah, how wonderful it is not to be Kevin Smith," but the thought occassionally crosses my mind.)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 7 May 2005 16:25 (twenty-one years ago)

SHUDDER

― s1ocki (slutsky), Saturday, 7 May 2005 20:30 (twenty-one years ago)

ned that's the scariest thing anyone has EVER said to me.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Saturday, 7 May 2005 20:32 (twenty-one years ago)

I wasn't joking with my description, was I!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 7 May 2005 20:34 (twenty-one years ago)

ever.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Saturday, 7 May 2005 20:43 (twenty-one years ago)

It's bloody awful.

And the high def DV makes the carbon-based lifeform secenes looks like Star Trek episodes without the visual depth.

Close-ups of people are problematic as the depth of field is so limited to get the highest defintion their hair is out of focus and looks like gooey plastic.

It seems to be edited by people wearing blindfolds.

And what a rivetting plot--the highly evil Palatine wants to take over the universe and almost does.

The end.

Save your money for Serenity.

― Ian in Brooklyn, Saturday, 7 May 2005 21:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Close-ups of people are problematic as the depth of field is so limited to get the highest defintion their hair is out of focus and looks like gooey plastic.

This makes no sense. The DV chip is smaller than a 35mm gate, therefore all depth of field should be increased. A longer lens or closer subject can indeed account for lower DoF, but by no means is this to blame bc of DV. If anything, the problem with DV is that it makes everything look way too well-defined even where it shouldn't be. Generally speaking, DPs want shallow depth of field - it's considered more "cinematic" at the moment.

― Girolamo Savonarola, Saturday, 7 May 2005 21:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Perhaps it's a CGI issue - blurring the lines between actors and CGI characters/background to make them blend better.

― milozauckerman (miloaukerman), Saturday, 7 May 2005 21:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Close-ups of people are problematic as the depth of field is so limited to get the highest defintion their hair is out of focus and looks like gooey plastic.

HD comes from lines of resolution, not increased dof, and Panavised (TM, C, R, etc.) Sony HD cams (I doubt Lucas used the Cine Altas again, but some new, not-on-market camera) have superb dof control thru the lens, rather than ENG HD cams where EVERTHING is in focus, and you basically have to fuck up the back focus to get any significant drop.

Milo more or less OTM wrt digital effect integration and possible image wankery.

GS also more or less OTM wrt dp's and dof -- most DP's try and shoot around an f4, depending on the situation, for dramatic effect.

it's considered more "cinematic" at the moment.

It's good storytelling.

― Jimmy Mod, Sultan of Sexxitime (ModJ), Saturday, 7 May 2005 22:55 (twenty-one years ago)

>this makes no sense. The DV chip is smaller than a 35mm gate, therefore all depth of field should be increased.

You're right--I didn't statte the problem accurately, thinking more of the result.

The problme is that there's too much DOF--the human eye sees foregroud things--or objects the mind is concenstrating on--more clearly, and background objects 'out of focus.'

Celluloid apes the process.

So what's being done here is that--I'm guessing; I don't work at ILM; sofrware is being used to simulate the effect, so that it looks more like film, which is waht we're used to seeing in things like this--and in how we see.

The problem is more apparent in shots where it's obvious distant backgrounds have been have been digitally fuzzed up make them look more, well, distant.

I'm not sure what the deal is with the close-ups--but it's not disputable--the faces are in focus, albeit with that waxen, orangey look that's the bane of the format, but anything even an inch away is, as noted, gluey-looking--in short, like over-duped video.

(Note--the version I saw was digitally projected as well.)

Which, if you were sitting close, made scan lines painfully apparent, and the sense you were, in effect, watching a horrible TV show undeniable.

That all noted, the stuff that never saw a lens, mainly the space battles, have an amzing clarity, with a color pallette that's pretty unprecendented, almost to the extent of being disorienting.

But, unfortunately, not disorienting to make one forget what crap you're watching.

― Ian in Brooklyn, Saturday, 7 May 2005 23:12 (twenty-one years ago)

>this makes no sense. The DV chip is smaller than a 35mm gate, therefore all depth of field should be increased.

You're right--I didn't statte the problem accurately, thinking more of the result.

The problme is that there's too much DOF--the human eye sees foregroud things--or objects the mind is concenstrating on--more clearly, and background objects 'out of focus.'

Celluloid apes the process.

The problem is more apparent in shots where it's obvious distant backgrounds have been have been digitally fuzzed up make them look more, well, distant.

(Note--the version I saw was digitally projected as well.)

Which, if you were sitting close, made scan lines painfully apparent, and the sense you were, in effect, watching a horrible TV show undeniable.

That all noted, the stuff that never saw a lens, mainly the space battles, have an amzing clarity, with a color pallette that's pretty unprecendented, almost to the extent of being disorienting.

But, unfortunately, not disorienting enough to make one forget what crap you're watching.

― Ian in Brooklyn, Saturday, 7 May 2005 23:12 (twenty-one years ago)

BTW, having just spent two weeks at Panavision, I can tell you definitively (although you can easily find this from any online cine-camera whores site) that no Panavision-Sony camera was used for Ep 3, though I am convinced that they probably would have used the Genesis had it been available at the time of shooting. (Genesis has S35 RGB-striped chip - therefore lower DoF and can use standard Panavision lenses.) George always was a PV fan.

― Girolamo Savonarola, Sunday, 8 May 2005 03:20 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't see how the technology in episodes IV-VI is inferior to the technology in episodes I-III. it only LOOKS it because of the gap in time between the trilogies.

― $V£N! (blueski), Sunday, 8 May 2005 11:53 (twenty-one years ago)

one little thing i was thinking about yesterday and it's something that affects most sci-fi out there is when dealing with other large planets how they all seem to consist of only one type of terrain e.g. Coruscant all city, Tatooine all desert and rocks. Where did this unimaginative corner-cutting come from? Surely most planets sustaining life would feature a broad range of terrain types ala Earth (you never see enough of another planet to see evidence of this anyway as there's no time in most stories it seems). Not that this really matters at all when it comes to how entertaining ROTS will be (as I do still expect to find it quite entertaining despite this whole issue with close-ups on people's hair).

― $V£N! (blueski), Sunday, 8 May 2005 11:57 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't see how the technology in episodes IV-VI is inferior to the technology in episodes I-III. it only LOOKS it because of the gap in time between the trilogies.

Well, just look at the robots. In episode 1 we see armies of sophisticated hi-tech killer robots, but the robots seen at the beginning of episode 4 look like walking barrels. Also, in the prequels R2D2 can fly, but in the "future" we see no signs of flying robots.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Sunday, 8 May 2005 12:20 (twenty-one years ago)

just because you don't see it, doesn't mean it's not there! It's possible though that the Clone Wars do wipe out the Geonosians, the Trade Fed. and the Techno Union as well as the Jedi so only the Clone Troopers (who along with the Jedi would be responsible for wiping out all the TF Battle Droids anyway) are left to man the Death Star and constitute the Imperial Forces. Or maybe the Battle Droids just got too expensive, like Concorde.

Maybe R2 just never managed to get his jets fixed. I agree it's a bit daft to introduce things like that in the prequels though.

― $V£N! (blueski), Sunday, 8 May 2005 14:26 (twenty-one years ago)

I love you, stevem. But this way surely lies madness. ;-)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 8 May 2005 14:27 (twenty-one years ago)

nothing is gonna make this okay.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Sunday, 8 May 2005 15:33 (twenty-one years ago)

what would make it ok is if at the end they discovere that actually 1-3 weren't prequels at all and all the name and plot connections were just coincidence and "phantom menace" all happened 1000000000 yrs after OG stars wars and yoda can regenerate like dr who

― mark s (mark s), Sunday, 8 May 2005 15:51 (twenty-one years ago)

I think tax revenue across the galaxy will have decreased greatly coz of the Sith revolution, Steve is probablt OTM about the trade federtaion et al, falling on hard times. Don't forget Han Solo is a smuggler, so we're talking a massive black economy, coupled with inter-galactic recesion.

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 8 May 2005 16:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Battle droids were never effective as the clone troopers, they were basically a peace time army. The Sith used them to hide their tracks and big up the threat from the Trade Fed et al, so that the Senate would facilitate the use of Clone Troopers.

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 8 May 2005 16:14 (twenty-one years ago)

to be honest i find all the war stuff in these movies completely incomprehensible.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Sunday, 8 May 2005 16:18 (twenty-one years ago)

like, empire vs. rebels, there's a nice good conflict. trade unionists vs. clones vs. separatist robots or whatever? boooorrrring.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Sunday, 8 May 2005 16:19 (twenty-one years ago)

nobody tell me it's "supposed" to be boring either.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Sunday, 8 May 2005 16:19 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh yeah, and Obi-Kwon totally does remember C-3PO and R2D2, he just can't give the game away. "Oh yeah, I know 3PO, your dad made him, d'oh!"

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 8 May 2005 16:23 (twenty-one years ago)

It's everybody vs the Jedi and their pals.

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 8 May 2005 16:24 (twenty-one years ago)

A genetic anomaly eventually rendered the Clone Troopers as rubbish at shooting stuff as the Battle Droids. It's the Destroyer droids I'm wondering about the fate of, as they were pretty badass.

― $V£N! (blueski), Sunday, 8 May 2005 16:51 (twenty-one years ago)

slutsky you're barking at the moon or something.

― $V£N! (blueski), Sunday, 8 May 2005 16:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Don't forget Han Solo is a smuggler, so we're talking a massive black economy

I forget, which are the countries untouched by smuggling right now?

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Monday, 9 May 2005 00:00 (twenty-one years ago)

A genetic anomaly eventually rendered the Clone Troopers as rubbish at shooting stuff as the Battle Droids

I thought it was just the cheap guns?

― Ste (Fuzzy), Monday, 9 May 2005 07:42 (twenty-one years ago)

I imagine it's hard to see in those ridiculous helmets.

― adam (adam), Monday, 9 May 2005 14:24 (twenty-one years ago)

I was actually surprised to see the Battle Droids in Clones, since they were so easily disposed of in such an obvious manner by a 6 yr-old in PhanMen.

― Huk-L, Monday, 9 May 2005 14:42 (twenty-one years ago)

They're made out of aluminum and therefore are easily reconstructed.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 9 May 2005 14:45 (twenty-one years ago)

But they were shut down by a 6-yr-old! He basically pulled the plug on them!
I thought for sure this was going to be the explanation of why they went to live Clone/Storm Troopers.

― Huk-L, Monday, 9 May 2005 14:47 (twenty-one years ago)

HOLY SHIT THERE"S A NEW STAR WARS MOVIE COMMING OUT???? Lucas should start promoting if he expects anyone to come see it!!! Maybe he could do some product tie-ins with like Doritos or 7-11 or Pepsi or the NBA or Burger King or something!!!?!

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Monday, 9 May 2005 14:48 (twenty-one years ago)

four weeks pass...

ok, didn't princess leia say something in one of the older movies about "remembering my mother"????

also a mother losing the will to live despite carrying children wtf?!

― Amateur(ist) (Amateur(ist)), Monday, 6 June 2005 19:14 (twenty-one years ago)

This has been discussed. (No answer was forthcoming.)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 6 June 2005 19:27 (twenty-one years ago)

which of the 80,000 stars wars threads was it discussed on though??

i thought the d.v. as frankenstein's monster scene was oddly shot... i mean the weird 1940s serial flash-gordon-looking long shot where he stumbles from his chains. it really needed a closeup or something for punch, as it is it looked ridiculous.

i liked this movie ok.

i guess what keeps it from actually being *good* as opposed to OK is that there's no conviction to the "i go nuts out of concern for my beloved/i go even nuttier because i think i killed her", because the love story never takes off. lucas evidently has no real interest in it.

― Amateur(ist) (Amateur(ist)), Monday, 6 June 2005 19:30 (twenty-one years ago)

also i find it too easy to make fun of the "noooooooooo!!!!!!" moment, and yet... ferchrissake.

― Amateur(ist) (Amateur(ist)), Monday, 6 June 2005 19:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Leia remembers her adopted Mum.

― Sociah T Azzahole (blueski), Monday, 6 June 2005 19:50 (twenty-one years ago)

I mean foster obv.

― Sociah T Azzahole (blueski), Monday, 6 June 2005 19:51 (twenty-one years ago)

NEEDED MORE LINGERING SHOTS OF STUMPS

― kyle (akmonday), Monday, 6 June 2005 19:52 (twenty-one years ago)

One of my coworkers was saying today how surprised he was that Star Wars slipped to 3rd place this weekend at the box office. I said, "Well, everyone's seen it by now, haven't they?" He said, "Oh, fuck YOU" and then I remembered that he hadn't seen it yet, ha ha.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 6 June 2005 19:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Hahahah.

It only just fell behind both Madagascar and The Longest Yard, FWIW, broke $300 million yadayadayada. And all three beat Russell Crowe is a Manly Man, No Really.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 6 June 2005 19:55 (twenty-one years ago)

i just saw it!

― Amateur(ist) (Amateur(ist)), Monday, 6 June 2005 19:56 (twenty-one years ago)

You're one up on my coworker, Am!

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 6 June 2005 20:00 (twenty-one years ago)

I said it on the other SITH thread; I'll say it again here: Darth Vader and Emperor (to-be) Palpatine sing "Puttin' On The Ritz."

Flash animators, join me and pwn teh interweb.

― rogermexico (rogermexico), Monday, 6 June 2005 20:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Okay, I finally saw this, and I have a few scattered, disjointed ideas.

1) Padme's pad in Coruscant was a FABULOUS piece of art deco. And I want Bail Organa's flying convertible. Many props to ROTS's art design.

2) Leia spatting with Han in Eps. IV-VI infinitely qwnz Padme cooing with Anakin in Eps. II-III. I assume Padme's passivity is necessary to foreshadow her dying of heartbreak during childbirth, but dang I missed Leia's spunkiness.

3) Did R2D2 have jet propulsion capability in shots other than the bit where he hops out of Anakin's jet? I assumed that rather the plane was equipped with a droid ejector seat.

― j.lu (j.lu), Tuesday, 7 June 2005 02:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Doesn't Obi-Wan say something in ANH about owning a droid like R2 "once"?

No, the reverse: "Can't remember ever owning a droid" or something like that, said very diffidently to be sure.

1) Don't Anakin and/or Padme own R2D2 and C3P0 by Episode III? Strictly speaking, he never owned either one.

2) At the time of Ep. IV, Obi-Wan has been in hiding on Tatooine for a generation; surely he keeps his tracks covered unless knows he truly can trust someone.

― j.lu (j.lu), Tuesday, 7 June 2005 02:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Went to see it last week. I even splashed out and went for the gallery seats with free nachos and popcorn. I thought it was dire.

While I’m here, does anyone know what the difference is between the gold and silver original box set is?

― not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Tuesday, 7 June 2005 07:36 (twenty-one years ago)

gold=full-screen/pan & scan, silver=widescreen/letterbox

― latebloomer: Pain Don't Hurt (latebloomer), Tuesday, 7 June 2005 08:55 (twenty-one years ago)

ah, thanks latebloomer. silver it is then.

― not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Tuesday, 7 June 2005 09:25 (twenty-one years ago)

I finally saw this last weekend. I was getting some serious dirty looks from people in the seats around me for all of the roffles during the love scenes but especially the "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" scene. That said, I liked some of the robots on Coruscant, but the rest didn't really do a whole lot for me.

― Leon hearts Crazy Frog (Ex Leon), Tuesday, 7 June 2005 12:31 (twenty-one years ago)

I will regret until my dying day that when the Chancellor names Anakin "Darth... Vader", I didn't yell "HOLY SHIT!".

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 7 June 2005 12:52 (twenty-one years ago)

SPOILER ALERT
SPOILER ALERT
SPOILER ALERT
SPOILER ALERT

Rosebud was the sled.

Carry on.

― The Mad Puffin, Tuesday, 7 June 2005 13:13 (twenty-one years ago)

http://vaderfortune.ytmnd.com/

― Huk-L, Wednesday, 8 June 2005 16:41 (twenty-one years ago)

I just saw it this past weekend, too. I never thought I would see Darth Vader waking up in bed and pacing downstairs!

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 8 June 2005 22:30 (twenty-one years ago)

I thought his transition from emo to goth was handled pretty well!

― Negativa, True Believer (You know you love it when I'm dressed in drag) (Barima), Thursday, 9 June 2005 10:19 (twenty-one years ago)

"Cast aside your Bright Eyes CDs and JOIN ME FOR BAUHAUS."

Anyway, Lileks actually had some good thoughts here.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 9 June 2005 18:40 (twenty-one years ago)

Just saw it last night. Wayyy better than I thought.

Anyone else notice the Millenium Falcon in one of the shots earlier in the movie of all of the ships/shuttles flying in traffic over the city?

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Sunday, 12 June 2005 16:44 (twenty years ago)

I did see that!

― Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Sunday, 12 June 2005 16:51 (twenty years ago)

I missed that! Damn!!

I had a great Star Wars revelation the other night, but I've forgotten what it was now.

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 12 June 2005 16:51 (twenty years ago)

oh, and I would've had it so that Darth asked something like "are the Jedi scum destroyed, my master?" rather than anything about Padme, I'd have had it so that he'd totally forgotten her.

And it would have also transpired that the Emperor had used the power of the Dark Side to kill Padme.

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 12 June 2005 16:55 (twenty years ago)

Caught the Falcon second time through. There's an easter egg page on the official site somewhere.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 12 June 2005 17:49 (twenty years ago)

why would you watch this movie twice??

― Amateur(ist) (Amateur(ist)), Sunday, 12 June 2005 18:23 (twenty years ago)

There's this thing called personal choice, see. (Friend from work and I caught it again two weeks back.)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 12 June 2005 18:38 (twenty years ago)

Ned, there's no reason to catch personal choice in this day and age...just use a bit of common sense. Thankfully there's an over-the-counter ointment available.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Sunday, 12 June 2005 19:21 (twenty years ago)

Mmmm, smeary.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 12 June 2005 19:31 (twenty years ago)

nine months pass...

Finally saw it last weekend and, while finding many of the obvious groaners (dialogue, Hayden, Ian McDiarmid unable to act like anything but a chickenhawk, battle scenes = videogames), not at all excruciating. And there is a core of respectable critics who advocate that Lucas is still a successful artist, like Seitz:

http://mattzollerseitz.blogspot.com/2006/01/fellowship-of-sith.html

"I now think anyone who reflexively dismisses that possibility that "Sith" is worth discussing AS A MOVIE is, in fact, a cinematic reactionary, a person who has unwittingly rejected the notion that a film's true worth resides in composition, camera movement and editing, rather than middlebrow notions of what's serious. (Critics are sheep; by and large, they like what they are told they should like.) As pop art, is "Sith" inherently less worthy of being taken seriously than ,"Howl's Moving Castle," "Steamboy" or "Corpse Bride?" Let's hope not. If melodramatic cliches, fairy tale tropes, broad physicality and elementary-school-comprehensible language render a film worthless, then those films, plus "War of the Worlds," "The Incredibles" and "Wallace and Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit," are all blank-outta-luck...

"Sith" is "Macbeth" for elementary schoolers, a primally simple narrative comprised of tropes so exact and conscious that they might as well be pictograms. But while it's simple, it's not simplistic. Lucas' mitochondrial approach to characterization still admits more complexity than most supposedly "adult" Hollywood movies. In "Sith," Anakin does evil things for what he thinks are good reasons; his fate, and the Chancellor's certainty of his own rightness, remind us that no villain thinks he's a villain. That's a lesson, people, one that's aimed not at hip adults who are sure they know everything, but at children. Repeat: children."

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 16:43 (twenty years ago)

Lucas' mitochondrial approach

Figures.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 16:45 (twenty years ago)

I just farted a little bit.

― Jimmy Mod: My theme is DEATH (The Famous Jimmy Mod), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 16:46 (twenty years ago)

You misspelled "midichlorian".

― Ichigo (ex machina), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 16:49 (twenty years ago)

"If it was in Japanese with English subtitles, you wouldn't be making fun of it."

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 16:52 (twenty years ago)

Children who will undoubtedly be bored out of their minds by everything in the movie that takes place in between the bouts of violence. Insert tarantino sucks joke here.

― TOMBOT (TOMBOT), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 16:54 (twenty years ago)

Tombot in taking break from romance to discuss Staar Wars SHOCKAH

― Jimmy Mod: My theme is DEATH (The Famous Jimmy Mod), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 16:55 (twenty years ago)

I work in after school care and these kids are DEFINITELY NOT BORED by this movie because they play Star Wars ALL THE DAMN TIME. But these kids are so little that they could not piece together that Anakin becomes Darth Vader so, no, YOU CANNOT PLAY ANAKIN VS. DARTH VADER LIGHTSABER DUEL BECAUSE IT IS NOT POSSIBLE, unless you wish to dramatize his internal struggle, in which case YOU KINDERGARTENERS MIGHT BE GENIUSES.

Also, playing as the emporer means waving your hands in the air and going "FSSHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

― Pwnjabi MC (Matt Chesnut), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 17:07 (twenty years ago)

That's electricity, dude.

― Jimmy Mod: My theme is DEATH (The Famous Jimmy Mod), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 17:09 (twenty years ago)

Ian McDiarmid unable to act like anything but a chickenhawk

And this is bad because...?

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 17:30 (twenty years ago)

He's a Sith lord, not an archbishop!

Really, nuthin says 'bored children' like $848,462,555 in ticket sales.

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 17:33 (twenty years ago)

He's a sith lord, not an archbishop!

(I have to pull this out one more time)

http://www.tomtaylor.co.uk/images/popepitine.gif

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 17:40 (twenty years ago)

If melodramatic cliches, fairy tale tropes, broad physicality and elementary-school-comprehensible language render a film worthless, then those films, plus "War of the Worlds," "The Incredibles" and "Wallace and Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit," are all blank-outta-luck...

I'll bet he regrets not writing "Sith-outta-luck..."

― The Yellow Kid, Wednesday, 5 April 2006 17:41 (twenty years ago)

The best acting in the new trilogy occurs in the opera scene: McDiarmid, at his least unctuous, making Christensen hard with his story of Darth Plagieus Da Wise

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 17:42 (twenty years ago)

this movie is good! i might buy it, but then i'd feel obligated to buy the other two, and there's only half a good movie there (all in Ep. II)

― gear (gear), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 17:43 (twenty years ago)

You can understand why everyone in that galaxy talks like that if that 'opera' is their art...

On the Sith DVD extra about Ani/Vader, a clip from the '77 film with Vader snarling "I WANT THE PRISONERS ALIIIIVE!" makes Lucas' "I never thought people would mistake him for Pure Evil" sound realllly clueless.

Trying to digitally replace Christensen in my head, I was pondering what mid-to-late 20s actor from Hollywood history could've made the hamfisted Turn to the Dark Side work best, and I came up with fledgling Kirk Douglas.

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 17:51 (twenty years ago)

I stopped watching this movie at the "opera" scene cuz I was BORED OUT OF MY FUCKING SKULL.

― Shakey Mo Collier (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 17:58 (twenty years ago)

Why do adults always assume that kids find the same things boring that they find boring?

― Dan (Hmmm) Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 17:59 (twenty years ago)

But I've always assumed kids would find, say, Silas Marner as boring as I do!

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 18:03 (twenty years ago)

(dialogue, Hayden, Ian McDiarmid unable to act like anything but a chickenhawk, battle scenes = videogames)

So... the dialogue, the acting, and the action scenes... but everything else was good? So, 90% of the movie sucked, but the other 10% redeemed it? For me, that 10% is wholely comprised of stuff that HAD to be in the film in order to achieve continuity with the original trilogy. Every scene that didn't offer the cheap thrills of nostalgic familiarity was stale, poorly acted, over-animated, and so on.

I mean, the movie was the best of the new trilogy, sure, but there was just so much there to dislike. And comparing it to films like The Incredibles and Wallace & Gromit is embarrassing. Yes, those films have similar goals. But their ability to accomplish those goals it the main point of separation.

Yes, the movie made a lot of money. No, it wasn't a good movie. Cross reference: Every other bad movie that made a lot of money.

― polyphonic (polyphonic), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 18:04 (twenty years ago)

-it +is, obviously.

― polyphonic (polyphonic), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 18:05 (twenty years ago)

Silas Marner, Jedi Hoarder

I concur, it wasn't good. It wasn't bad, though. It's likeA History of Violence with worse hair.

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 18:06 (twenty years ago)

(Critics are sheep; by and large, they like what they are told they should like.)

it's the liberal media's fault!

― s1ocki (slutsky), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 18:20 (twenty years ago)

?? that's not a Seitz-type sentiment (esp since he's a TV critic for a daily, film for a weekly). There's no other explanation for the lemminglike near-unanimity around stuff from Unforgiven to City of God to AHOV to keep all the brows covered.

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 18:26 (twenty years ago)

his argument (that people don't like sith because they have old-fashioned ideas of what "good" is) is stupid and desperate

― s1ocki (slutsky), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 20:46 (twenty years ago)

almost as bad as "the originals weren't actually that good anyway!"

― s1ocki (slutsky), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 20:46 (twenty years ago)

http://img215.exs.cx/img215/9551/lucasmickey8jv.jpg

― latebloomer: someone's been drinking my youth! (latebloomer), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 21:16 (twenty years ago)

god how I hate him

― Shakey Mo Collier (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 21:16 (twenty years ago)

i think there are many people who will like something based on trying to squeeze it into their preconceived notions, but the vast majority of people don't. more likely, people will see something based on acclaim, but they won't necessarily like it.

as far as i'm concerned re: those three critic-magnet films cited, i'm ambivalent about unforgiven, city of god is about as good as better luck tomorrow, which means it's pretty mediocre, and a history of violence is even better than advertised.

― gear (gear), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 23:54 (twenty years ago)

Star Wars, The Ring of the Niebelungen and Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp are based on the same source material.

his argument (that people don't like sith because they have old-fashioned ideas of what "good" is) is stupid

I don't think he's arguing that, if anything it's that they have, I dunno, 'post-sincerity' ideas of what "good" is? (Trying not to sound like Jedediah Purdy here.) Or just one idea of what it is. I saw a few minutes of the Archers' Thief of Bagdad last night -- a kids' adventure movie that wipes the floor with all the Star Wars movies except the first two, I'd say -- but Seitz thinks ppl are using high-art criteria for adults for Sith rather than a film like that.

ie, if Irvin Kershner and Leigh Brackett had been around, Episode III could've been real good.

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 6 April 2006 14:11 (twenty years ago)

ie, if Irvin Kershner and Leigh Brackett had been around, Episode III could've been real good.

is there any criticism that suggests Lucas's direction on these movies is actually good? Kershner's work on Empire was fantastic, would have loved to see him direct one or all of the prequels.

― i am not a nugget (stevie), Thursday, 6 April 2006 14:29 (twenty years ago)

well, he's about 83 and hasn't directed in 15+ years.

Frankly, I thought the most 'mythic' moments of the prequels (climaxing in the birth of Vader) were pretty well staged; it's the plotting and characterizations that fell way short.

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 6 April 2006 14:39 (twenty years ago)

Frankly, I thought the most 'mythic' moments of the prequels (climaxing in the birth of Vader) were pretty well staged; it's the plotting and characterizations that fell way short.

completely (and characterisation was Kershner's forte on Empire). also, the action scenes (certainly in the first movie) seemed very fitful, confusing and frustratingly edited.

― i am not a nugget (stevie), Thursday, 6 April 2006 15:18 (twenty years ago)

if ep 3 really had been an old-fashioned, super-entertaining romp with no "high-art" cred, i'd be the first in line to defend it! really, i would!

― s1ocki (slutsky), Thursday, 6 April 2006 15:25 (twenty years ago)

it's the plotting and characterizations that fell way short

the plotting was a tough one - presumably much of it goes over many kids heads, so much going on, more intricacies (conceptually at least). in the prequels there's no fixed enemy such as the Empire, just lots of different bad dudes running around here and there (it's not until ROTJ that you have Jabba and co. replace Empire as the major adversary for a large chunk of the film).

no Empire, no fixed 'bad guy' - should've made things more interesting! but it was problematic. in the first film kids don't get much chance to really hate on Maul, plus he looks so badass ala Fett that many probably loved him really. anyway he's gone by the end so what a premature waste. cut to the second film and again the enemies don't have enough screen time for that pantomime effect to really take hold. even in the third film, Anakin's switch to badness is so quick. this has emerged as one of my big gripes with the prequels. but otoh i like that the story avoids predictability and pandering to lowest common denominator in this respect.

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Thursday, 6 April 2006 15:37 (twenty years ago)

s1ocki what do you say are the examples of 'high-art' cred in episode 3?

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Thursday, 6 April 2006 15:40 (twenty years ago)

yeahhh, i was wonderin... also, Empire introduced the Freudian stuff / Wagnerian echoes, all to the good. The execution is everything.

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 6 April 2006 15:42 (twenty years ago)

no i'm not saying there WAS any high-art cred, i'm responding to Morbius's "but Seitz thinks ppl are using high-art criteria for adults for Sith rather than a film like that."

― s1ocki (slutsky), Thursday, 6 April 2006 15:44 (twenty years ago)

(in other words i'm saying the movie's high-artiness or rather lack thereof had nothing to do with why i didn't like it)

― s1ocki (slutsky), Thursday, 6 April 2006 15:44 (twenty years ago)

remember that all-important Lucas quote along the lines of "I wanted people (kids?) to be able to know what was going on even with the sound off"

...which, in a somewhat twisted, way also explains much of the lame dialogue...

...still i wonder how well he really pulled that off.

i finally bought the DVD the other day as it's down to £7 on amazon.

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Thursday, 6 April 2006 15:45 (twenty years ago)

I just found out what "mitochlorides" are re the typo in the Seitz column, as only a Master Geek could retain that. (I still have no idea who Boba Fett is.)

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Friday, 7 April 2006 14:39 (twenty years ago)

or IS it a typo? I guess Lucas' style could be mitochondrian... since that's an actual word.

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Friday, 7 April 2006 14:40 (twenty years ago)

also, Empire introduced the Freudian stuff / Wagnerian echoes, all to the good. The execution is everything.

Yup.

http://calebband.org.uk/files/sw.gif

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 7 April 2006 14:42 (twenty years ago)

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