Your Least Favorite Ad Campaigns

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Any campaigns that really piss you off?

― 57 7th (calstars), Friday, 21 May 2004 21:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Here's mine:
http://www.english.upenn.edu/~afilreis/Images/jksm.gif

― 57 7th (calstars), Friday, 21 May 2004 21:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah. Remember the Hitler wore Khakis jokes.

― Michael White (Hereward), Friday, 21 May 2004 21:43 (twenty-two years ago)

I hate these fucking stuck up alien bitches:

http://www.textanalyse.dk/Billeder/steve%20madden%204.jpg

― bill stevens (bscrubbins), Friday, 21 May 2004 21:46 (twenty-two years ago)

all the gap/old navy ones
that Valtrex one (i think it's Valtrex) about permasmile Bob.

― oops (Oops), Friday, 21 May 2004 21:47 (twenty-two years ago)

http://webpub.allegheny.edu/employee/i/iroy/fall%202003/CA%20260/260%20assts%20FA03/coors%20twins.jpg

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 21 May 2004 21:48 (twenty-two years ago)

the one on the left =

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B000003MSH.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 21 May 2004 21:50 (twenty-two years ago)

those "priceless" mastercard ones

― sexyDancer, Friday, 21 May 2004 21:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Anything that has senior citizens using "young" slang. Fucking DESTROY.

Anything with Catherine Zeta-Jones or Joan Cusack.

Basically ALL cell phone ads.

That fucking Pepsi ad with the Blind Lemon song that was running constantly on Fox Sports for a while, but thankfully seems to have stopped.

And yes, that goddamn mastercard. They've been using that campaign for over a DECADE now! A DECADE!!!! Jesus H. Christ on a popsicle stick, GET A NEW AD CAMPAIGN YOU FUCKS.

― Broheems (diamond), Friday, 21 May 2004 22:08 (twenty-two years ago)

the fucking worst are those ads with the actors reading letters from satisfied cable customers and acting out the parts in super-smug voices, in front of a blue screen. DirectTV ads I think. Whoever came up with that campaign should be DESTROYED

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 21 May 2004 22:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh yeah, those suck too. John Goodman and Danny DeVito: BITE ME! Get off my screen!

Also I forgot on the cell phone tip - that ad with the emus!! Arrgghh! I'm waking up in the middle of the night with fucking emus ... what is that emus do? cooing? crowing?? Anyway: DESTROY.

― Broheems (diamond), Friday, 21 May 2004 22:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Here comes Peter Cottontail...

OLD NAVY also

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Friday, 21 May 2004 22:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Basically ALL cell phone ads.

destroy the new verizon "in" ad campaign with the guy whose slacker housemates keep calling him at his office job.

i like the old navy ads. they're strangely calming. they make me feel centered.

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 21 May 2004 22:20 (twenty-two years ago)

The ones I dislike are all the low-tech loan and credit ads, especially for people who have been refused elsewhere.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Friday, 21 May 2004 22:21 (twenty-two years ago)

The ones I dislike are all the low-tech loan and credit ads, especially for people who have been refused elsewhere.

Trying to work out the nadir of that genre is hard. I'd hazard a guess that the twat on the tightrope in the Norton Finance ad would be up the front, though.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Friday, 21 May 2004 22:27 (twenty-two years ago)

All non-VW car commercials. They suck because they show the car interiors.

― Leeefuse 73 (Leee), Friday, 21 May 2004 22:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Somebody should shoot the DiTech guy and put him out of my misery.

― Michael White (Hereward), Friday, 21 May 2004 22:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Destroy DESTROY DESTROY all those HEMI commercials!

― Leeefuse 73 (Leee), Friday, 21 May 2004 23:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Those farting guitars really get me.

― Leeefuse 73 (Leee), Friday, 21 May 2004 23:02 (twenty-two years ago)

i like the old navy ads. they're strangely calming. they make me feel centered.

Aaaaaah, help! Jody, are you being dry or should I be terrified of you?

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Friday, 21 May 2004 23:04 (twenty-two years ago)

all i'll say is sherman hemsley and morgan fairchild look like they're having a much better time than i am.

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 21 May 2004 23:13 (twenty-two years ago)

ask Lauren P how much she loves the old Pepsi ads with the percocious little curly haired girl.

― Dan Selzer (Dan Selzer), Friday, 21 May 2004 23:14 (twenty-two years ago)

What's wrong with the Old Navy ads? Yeah, they're advertisements but they're so odd that I usually think they're some sort of Sub-Genius/Discordian stunt (or message to their operatives)

― Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Friday, 21 May 2004 23:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Lee OTMFM re: Hemi ads

― oops (Oops), Friday, 21 May 2004 23:19 (twenty-two years ago)

the accenture ads. all that is wrong with the world

http://www.accenture.com/pic/locations/norway/norway_home_tigerbanner.jpg

― gareth (gareth), Friday, 21 May 2004 23:22 (twenty-two years ago)

hey oops

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 21 May 2004 23:23 (twenty-two years ago)

oops!

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 21 May 2004 23:24 (twenty-two years ago)

what?

― oops (Oops), Friday, 21 May 2004 23:31 (twenty-two years ago)

THAT THANG GOT A HEMI

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 21 May 2004 23:31 (twenty-two years ago)

*bang*

― oops (Oops), Friday, 21 May 2004 23:33 (twenty-two years ago)

and see how smooth the ride is for you and fluffy?

― Broheems (diamond), Friday, 21 May 2004 23:33 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.accenture.com/pic/aboutus/advertising/tiger/footsteps.jpg

aaarggh

― gareth (gareth), Friday, 21 May 2004 23:35 (twenty-two years ago)

are you the kind of no-personality manager that identifies with your company waaay too much, and thinks of day to day business as some kind of sport, and yourself as a sports star "in the zone"?

maybe you stride up and down your office, looking at your staff paternalistically. for you, business is a game to be fought, and won...

perhaps you have a wife who is going to leave you because you never show any attention, and 2 children who see more of "uncle steve" than they do of you. maybe you will get hit with a divorce and high alimony payments from you ridiculuosly high paying job, and then stress will cause you to have a midlife crisis, and hit the bottle

maybe you are a lower ranking manager who aspires to the above, but is laughed at by his colleagues for giving all to the company, when they dont even notice him

you probably value loyalty, and are yourself a company man, maybe you even think of the company as a family, and you are kind of the father. still, management can always be pruned right, efficiency means downsizing and your loyalty isnt worth much then is it? still, maybe uncle steve will let you see the kids, before they all move off to phoenix.

http://www.accenture.com/pic/aboutus/advertising/tiger/endeavor.jpg

go on, be an egotistical emotionally stunted powerhungry dickhead

― gareth (gareth), Friday, 21 May 2004 23:43 (twenty-two years ago)

*round of applause*

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Saturday, 22 May 2004 00:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Aflac. AFLAC!

― m.e.a. (m.e.a.), Saturday, 22 May 2004 00:44 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.ditech.com/images/home/banker.gif

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Saturday, 22 May 2004 00:50 (twenty-two years ago)

I miss the Carrie Donovan Old Navy ads...they're what people used to call "daffy."

Not too long after 9/11 there was one local NYC commercial that featured SUVs cruising, overrunning and finally climbing some of the buildings that used to fall under the shadow of the Twin Towers. It's not too difficult to connect the dots between America's fuel consumption and international terrorism, but here those connections played out as farce.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Saturday, 22 May 2004 01:22 (twenty-two years ago)

accenture are fucking evil. they managed to come in and take over all the systems/programming work for our main client (acquiring our client's employees), gave them 90 days notice, and made them remotely train their offshore cheap replacements. suffice it to say, not a lot of knowledge transfer happened in those 90 days. so now we inherited all the work accenture was supposed to have taken care of.

― kyle (akmonday), Saturday, 22 May 2004 01:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Those Avaya ads. Fuck that guy and his higher plane in communication. And his forkloader.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Saturday, 22 May 2004 02:10 (twenty-two years ago)

"Zoom-zoom."

― m.e.a. (m.e.a.), Saturday, 22 May 2004 02:16 (twenty-two years ago)

destroy the new verizon "in" ad campaign with the guy whose slacker housemates keep calling him at his office job.

The guy who says "Guess how many cookies I have in my mouth" was the lead in my senior thesis.

― TheNewJMod (JMod), Saturday, 22 May 2004 02:35 (twenty-two years ago)

I pretty much hate all ads. Except for maybe that one where the girl plugs up the leak in the rowboat. That one's so stupid and silly I can't help but like it.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Saturday, 22 May 2004 02:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Hall of Fame:

1) The car commercial with the people singing along to the Barenaked Ladies.

2) Jared/Subway.

3) the truth.com when they were doing those awful Michael Moore documentaries

The Old Navy commercials creep the shit out of me, sorry. If it were just Sherman and Morgan, I could take that, but the scores of young, beautiful models smiling vapidly and saying things like "Back to you, Malibu!"...eerie.

― Joe (Joe), Saturday, 22 May 2004 14:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Maybe it goes without saying, but destroy pretty much every campaign ad evah. How come every principle of good advertising gets thrown out the window when it comes to these things?

― the krza (krza), Saturday, 22 May 2004 14:46 (twenty-two years ago)

has anyone mentioned that Verizon emo asshole and his damn work jacket and damn horn-rimmed glasses? and how in every print ad he's got this smirk on his face? And by the fucking way, DICKHEAD, I can't talk on my cell phone in my ROOM for some reason. Someone needs to take a 2x4 to his head. "Can you hear me now??" (smack) "GOOD!"

― Gear! (Gear!), Saturday, 22 May 2004 15:17 (twenty-two years ago)

"3) the truth.com when they were doing those awful Michael Moore documentaries"

made me want to start smoking.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Saturday, 22 May 2004 16:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Anything with talking heads from "satisfied customers" i.e. actors.

― Crackity (Crackity Jones), Saturday, 22 May 2004 16:44 (twenty-two years ago)

One for the Southern California residents here...

Every single horrible Los Angeles Times ad that ran before the trailers at a movie.

― Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Saturday, 22 May 2004 16:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Much too broad a topic. It diffuses the hate when the hate should be cherished and treasured and rolled into a tight little ball of fury and hurled at the target with devastating effect. And, of course, hilarity ensues.

― Aimless (Aimless), Saturday, 22 May 2004 17:11 (twenty-two years ago)

The Maxwell House coffee one where the guy smells the coffee and his nostrils start singing a Kool and the Gang song. Yes, literally (just in case you haven't seen it). I know that almost makes it sound good, but in reality it just makes me want to stab dull sporks in my eyes.

― Kim (Kim), Saturday, 22 May 2004 18:51 (twenty-two years ago)

BTW, I feel dumb asking this, but who exactly IS the (Australian?) Campbell's Soup guy (also, what is his name?)? I know one commercial where he knocks on the family's door, and he says something like "Know who I am?" and the woman answering says, "Oh yes, I know who you are!" (and it seems this was when the t.v. adverts with him were just beginning).

Is there something more to him than just being the Campbell's Soup spokesman? Is he a famous soap opera star? former athlete? royalty?

― Joe (Joe), Saturday, 22 May 2004 19:27 (twenty-two years ago)

And yes, that's 50 posts without a single mention of the Smirnoff Ice ads.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Saturday, 22 May 2004 19:35 (twenty-two years ago)

It's Gordon Elliott, who is all over the Food Network. And yes, he is supremely annoying. Ha, reading that bio just now - I was unaware that the guy in fact isn't even a trained chef. Just a TV talking head type. Figures.

― Broheems (diamond), Saturday, 22 May 2004 19:36 (twenty-two years ago)

That upscale car ad where a bunch of squash players are saying things like "Well I've definitely been earmarked for the board," and "I've quadrupled my turnover in five years" then when they leave the sports centre the only one who hasn't spoken says "Anyone need a lift?" and all these hugely successful blokes do (none of them own a car?), and they get in some fairly classy motor and say "What did you say you do?" and he says "I didn't." The message seems to be that you may think these other men are smug and arrogant, but look how much more smug and arrogant you can be with this car.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Saturday, 22 May 2004 22:17 (twenty-two years ago)

the new york times ads that have been running incessantly for the past couple of years. i want to kill all those smug yuppie shitheads.

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Saturday, 22 May 2004 22:20 (twenty-two years ago)

and yes, DESTROY THE steve madden anorexic-alien ad campaign. dude, you're selling SHOES; no need to make people feel even more fucked up about body image than they do already.

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Saturday, 22 May 2004 22:21 (twenty-two years ago)

"I'm spiccccy"

― A Nairn (moretap), Saturday, 22 May 2004 22:21 (twenty-two years ago)

haha sorry "THE" was capped there. i may be drunk right now.

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Saturday, 22 May 2004 22:22 (twenty-two years ago)

also: destroy the advertising trend of asking a question at the end of every commercial: "how do YOU use ______?" for a while everyone was doing it and i just felt so sorry for the viewers who said "shucks, how DO i use _____?" is that supposed to engage people? does it work?

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Saturday, 22 May 2004 22:25 (twenty-two years ago)

the new york times ads that have been running incessantly for the past couple of years. i want to kill all those smug yuppie shitheads.

hahaha, YES! I thought of listing those, but I didn't. But yeah, "I'm not sure what I enjoy more, DOING the crossword, or actually FINISHING it." False dichotomy ahoy! Also what does that knob say? "I reach for the Week in Review, she goes for Arts & Leisure." Yes, because I am A MAN, and she is A WOMAN, DO YOU SEE?

― Broheems (diamond), Saturday, 22 May 2004 22:35 (twenty-two years ago)

oh also, destroy the low-rent "shaky camera" effect

― Broheems (diamond), Saturday, 22 May 2004 22:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Someone needs to take a 2x4 to his head. "Can you hear me now??" (smack) "GOOD!"

fuck you! fuck you! fuck you! i love him!

― phil-two (phil-two), Saturday, 22 May 2004 23:15 (twenty-two years ago)

I've just seen a Game Boy Advance commercial soundtracked by Goldfrapp. GOLDFRAPP. Folks, my head hurts just thinking about it. That is the lowest of the low commercial-wise that I've seen in recent memory, managing to displace the Nikon Coolpix digital camera commercial with the dancing turtle and the local low-tech legal firm commercial featuring bad (wooden doesn't even begin to describe it) acting and even worse "special effects" where the lawyer ends up turning into some sort of tiger-type animation.

On the other hand, I adore the "Tostitos and dip in the conference room" commercial.

― Those Beautiful Lines (Dee the Lurker), Sunday, 23 May 2004 02:43 (twenty-two years ago)

for those in the UK....
"calm down dear, it's only a commercial..."

*must kill michael winner. must kill michael winner*

― smudger (smudger), Sunday, 23 May 2004 08:29 (twenty-two years ago)

the tui billboards in auckland severely depress me. more sexist than speights & way less homoerotic!

― etc, Sunday, 23 May 2004 13:38 (twenty-two years ago)

the ads for Enzyte "Natural Male Enhancement" with the freaky fifties guy who goes to the Japanese restaurant in MOST RACIST AD EVER SHOCK

― Morley Timmons (Donna Brown), Monday, 24 May 2004 21:20 (twenty-two years ago)

c'mon people:

"I'm George Bush and I approved this message."

― hstencil (hstencil), Monday, 24 May 2004 21:24 (twenty-two years ago)

The new Smirnoff Ice ads feature Dean Gaffney. For fuck's sakes.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Monday, 24 May 2004 21:26 (twenty-two years ago)

also, the Verizon guy is nice in person.

― hstencil (hstencil), Monday, 24 May 2004 21:28 (twenty-two years ago)

How are we this far without mentioning those fucking awful, creepy Citi identity theft ads?

― C0L1N B3CK3TT (Colin Beckett), Monday, 24 May 2004 21:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Also: "Imagine me, Midge, on a farm! With my allergies!"

― C0L1N B3CK3TT (Colin Beckett), Monday, 24 May 2004 21:31 (twenty-two years ago)

those are indeed icky, but not as icky as the identity theft ads where they call you if you buy stuff that you 'shouldn't' be buying xpost

― Morley Timmons (Donna Brown), Monday, 24 May 2004 21:31 (twenty-two years ago)

also, the Verizon guy is nice in person.

???????????

― phil-two (phil-two), Monday, 24 May 2004 21:47 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm on hold for a Kate Spad3 ad campaign. If I don't get it (its between me and 2 other chinks), then THAT will be my least favorite ad campaign.

― phil-two (phil-two), Monday, 24 May 2004 21:49 (twenty-two years ago)

gawd, the IBM ads where someone is pitching some sort of miracle Business gadget. I won't even start. ...it's just how these commercials presume that everone on earth knows how a successful business is run, and that Good Business Sense can be thoroughly explicated with a handful of generic, uttely meaningless biz-babble soundbites.

― Aaron A., Monday, 24 May 2004 21:50 (twenty-two years ago)

oh, and ALL digital camera TV spots- "I can stalk women MUCH MORE EASILY now!"

― Morley Timmons (Donna Brown), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 03:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Phil I keep telling you the story about working on the Verizon ad last fall and you keep forgetting it!

― hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 03:17 (twenty-two years ago)

I used to hate the Old Navy ads, but the latest one has a Booty Bass soundtrack. Booty Bass!

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 05:42 (twenty-two years ago)

The tiny people in the VW and the girl who gets chased by the cat.

Those CUNTS in the Smirnoff Ice campaign with their "stink room" shit - did they learn nothing from the monstrosity that was the "spafe" campaign???

On the flip side, I really like the Carphone Warehouse (is it?) ad about the relationship between the phone and the cute short-haired girl.

― Markelby (Mark C), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 10:41 (twenty-two years ago)

oh you like it because of the GIRL. I had been wondering about that.

I actually like those Citi ID theft ones, since that happened recently to me, and it amuses me to think of me narrating the tale of tyre and mobile phone shopping with the voice of a Croydon ned.

― sgs (sgs), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 10:47 (twenty-two years ago)

The Dell Interns (not sure if it has been posted). I hate the Dell Interns - they should all be drafted and sent immediately to Najaf.

― aimurchie, Tuesday, 25 May 2004 10:59 (twenty-two years ago)

the "intel inside" riff annoys me. "ding dingdingdingding" eeeeee.

― ken c (ken c), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 11:05 (twenty-two years ago)

I hate that stupid little riff too. All car adverts are shite, always have been and looks like they always will be

― Dadaismus (Dada), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 11:07 (twenty-two years ago)

dude, the halifax

― chris (chris), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 11:22 (twenty-two years ago)

a Croydon ned?

― stevem (blueski), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 11:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Halifax bank? With that Al Roker-looking dude and the song that sounds like "Sex Bomb"? That is a bad one

― Morley Timmons (Donna Brown), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 15:00 (twenty-two years ago)

all of those, all awful. I want to punch that bloke soooo hard

― chris (chris), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 15:01 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm going to dinner at friends' apartment tonight; they live in the same building as the Dell Dude.

― hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 15:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Steve is a cokehead!

― Be sure to Loop! Loop, Loop, Loop. (ex machina), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 15:04 (twenty-two years ago)

yeah but he got nailed for pot. Another friend of mine was at that party. The Dell Dude was wearing a kilt.

― hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 15:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Phil I keep telling you the story about working on the Verizon ad last fall and you keep forgetting it!

you never told me that!!!! i'm sure i would have remembered.

― phil-two (phil-two), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 16:23 (twenty-two years ago)

dude I know I told you! He's cute and nice and most importantly um "on your team" if you know what I mean.

― hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 25 May 2004 16:25 (twenty-two years ago)

I remember the Verizon guy story, so hstencil must have told you, phil!

― tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Wednesday, 26 May 2004 01:42 (twenty-two years ago)

― phil-two (phil-two), Wednesday, 26 May 2004 05:48 (twenty-two years ago)

i meant, ":)"

― phil-two (phil-two), Wednesday, 26 May 2004 05:49 (twenty-two years ago)

and im almost certain you never told me that!! this is the happiest piece of news ever.

― phil-two (phil-two), Wednesday, 26 May 2004 05:52 (twenty-two years ago)

"All car adverts are shite, always have been and looks like they always will be "

OTM.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Wednesday, 26 May 2004 06:47 (twenty-two years ago)

wtf??

OVEN MITT OVEN MITT KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL

― g--ff (gcannon), Wednesday, 26 May 2004 06:55 (twenty-two years ago)

(Stevem, does Croydon have no neds? (and I think I mean the right thing by 'neds'?))

I hate the Abbey National ads. I hate them because of the idiotic "da-da-da, da, da, da, dadadadaDUM" woman singing--it's like a mental ward soundtrack to me.

― sgs (sgs), Wednesday, 26 May 2004 07:26 (twenty-two years ago)

KILL KILL OVEN MITT I HATE IT I HATE IT

― g--ff (gcannon), Wednesday, 26 May 2004 13:20 (twenty-two years ago)

I miss the Carrie Donovan Old Navy ads...they're what people used to call "daffy."

I still catch myself shrugging and lisping "Everyone needs giftsss."

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Wednesday, 26 May 2004 13:36 (twenty-two years ago)

g--ff OTM with Oven Mitt. Arby's completely off the mark with oven mitt.

― dave225 (Dave225), Wednesday, 26 May 2004 14:21 (twenty-two years ago)

(Stevem, does Croydon have no neds? (and I think I mean the right thing by 'neds'?))

I must visit Croydon.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 26 May 2004 15:37 (twenty-two years ago)

The Six Flags commercial with some actor done up in creepy old-guy makeup and a bowtie, dancing to early '90's techno. Why is this supposed to make me want to go to Six Flags?

― NA (Nick A.), Wednesday, 26 May 2004 15:47 (twenty-two years ago)

that commercial is horrifying. that old man is coming to cart all those people off to their deaths.

― kyle (akmonday), Wednesday, 26 May 2004 15:53 (twenty-two years ago)

That fucking "quote me happy" bullshit is getting out of hand.

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Wednesday, 26 May 2004 16:20 (twenty-two years ago)

As I have read this page and related to many of your obsevations on "worst" ad's, I noticed that no one has mentioned the OVERLY-GRATUITOUS-"IN-YOUR-FACE" advertisements for those Miracle pads. AKA:
Maxi's, Mini's, Ultra's, Super-Mega-all-night-long Panty Liners,(now with stay-fresh "Absorba-odor" Weave)and my personal all time favorite(not): those "stinky-coochie" Douche commercials! What Biotch can't just use a simple bar of soap to keep "it" clean?
This one's gonna be a stretch but here goes...... Does anyone remember this little jingle?
"I'm dreaming of summer, cool breezes, fresh air. When I want that feeling, Summer's Eve takes me "there".
It's cool, fresh, feelings keep the "good times" on my mind. Summer's Eve brings back freshness anytime"........
I am a disgusting product of my environment to be able to remember this commercial! I am currently in therapy for this!!!!
Great topic! Great site!

― craig hanzelka (craig hanzelka), Thursday, 27 May 2004 03:30 (twenty-two years ago)

-Sumthin' else,
VAGINAL D-R-Y-N-E-S-S???? Does anyone really need to know about this shit? "Personal" LUBRICANTS!?!?! Bitch, grab some VASOLINE!

― craig hanzelka (craig hanzelka), Thursday, 27 May 2004 03:34 (twenty-two years ago)

new least favorite ads: the KFC ads, particularly the one with the "right-wing/left-wing" political puns, but also the new one with the woman in the "chicks for chickens" t-shirt. Chickentown USA??? ick.

― kyle (akmonday), Thursday, 27 May 2004 03:35 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm a little surprised that they openly advertise KY warming lube on tv.

― kyle (akmonday), Thursday, 27 May 2004 03:40 (twenty-two years ago)

About the "creepy" old man in the Six Flags Ad,

He is actually in his EARLY 20's, a native Texan, with a shit-load of make-up and prosthetics on. How do I know this? I too am an actor and one day, will get my reward to be HATED on this page!!! (god I can't wait!)Just did a Verizon ad, NO, I AM NOT the nerd in the glasses!(though, I wouldn't mind his PAYCHECK!) Ha!

― craig hanzelka (craig hanzelka), Thursday, 27 May 2004 03:45 (twenty-two years ago)

C'mon Kyle, the "area" in question doesn't really need that "Icey-cool" feeling like one's mouth!

― craig hanzelka (craig hanzelka), Thursday, 27 May 2004 03:47 (twenty-two years ago)

O.K., This will be my last submission(for now)...
What is up with the NEW Gillette Mach 3 razor???
Pulsating action(via a battery in the handle)to give your face(or your wife's legs)a "stimulating" sense of PLEASURE while shaving!
Get real! I'll strap on a vibrator to my current razor and see what happens! Here's the BEST PART, this "new tool" cost's $14.99!!!!
It comes with one, battery operated razor and 2 blades....
I'd like to call this the "raping" of America!

― craig hanzelka (craig hanzelka), Thursday, 27 May 2004 04:00 (twenty-two years ago)

You're shitting me, right? There is no way in hell anyone in the entire world has actually been stupid enough to stick a VIBRATOR on a RAZOR BLADE.

Right?

― Allyzay, Thursday, 27 May 2004 04:40 (twenty-two years ago)

I like that oven mitt, we were very excited when we saw a dwarf (possibly child, but I like to think dwarf) dressed up as him prancing along the side of Highway 1 in Key Largo.

I really like the lady that cleans the dirty mouths (Wrigleys?) they were great adverts

― chris (chris), Thursday, 27 May 2004 12:25 (twenty-two years ago)

-I was not actually going to go through with the "Vibra-razor" technique...... Just trying to make a point yet one more superfluous advert.......

― craig hanzelka (craig hanzelka), Friday, 28 May 2004 01:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Fuck you, New York Times - that girl reading the NYT to learn about the internet needs the Dell Dude to come quick with the hookup (and you know what I mean). (Her mom, tho - SHE'S SPICAY!)

FUCK YOU "I'M LOVING IT" IN EVERY GENRE POSSIBLE YOU FUCKING SOY-BASED JERK FUCKS. If I ever got hit or pushed or even looked at funny because of something involving McDonalds, I will do the world a favor and kill.

Fuck the Scottish gum. Fuck the Burger King office tards. Fuck the Diane Lane clone trying to talk up Levitra. And holy shit FUCK YOU COORS LIGHT and your fucking dumb shit pro-chauvanist Man Show tit-fucking "guys are guys" strategy. Shove that monkey-brained shit up the same sinkhole you're shoving your fucking heads, you pea-brained shiftless no-good bastard fucks.

Hi.

Only good commercial ever made = the Virgin Mobile spot w/ the Isaac-from-the-Love-Boat looking guy in a brown Members Only jacket singing some Aphrodite's Child love song. Or maybe the Virgin Mobile spot where the girl in art class airbrushes a unicorn that comes to life and flies her away.

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 28 May 2004 02:12 (twenty-two years ago)

BTW - Chris B is talking about Orbit gum. Fabulous!

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 28 May 2004 02:13 (twenty-two years ago)

Just did a Verizon ad, NO, I AM NOT the nerd in the glasses!

too bad for you. hes hott.

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 28 May 2004 07:47 (twenty-two years ago)

That's it David, they're great adverts

― chris (chris), Friday, 28 May 2004 07:57 (twenty-two years ago)

haha yes! the orbit commercials are hi-larious

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 28 May 2004 08:02 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm trying to remember which ones I saw, there was a chinese gymnast, and another one, which strangely I laughed like a drain at but can't remember.

― chris (chris), Friday, 28 May 2004 08:05 (twenty-two years ago)

xxxxpost the manner in which McDonalds has co-opted the "Super Size
Me" ads (i.e. reviewer quotes-"I'm lovin' it!")is quite irritating

― Morley Timmons (Donna Brown), Friday, 28 May 2004 09:16 (twenty-two years ago)

"So injury claims for u, if I were in accident, how much COMPENSATION would I recieve"

etc etc

Pretty much all daytime TV ads.

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Friday, 28 May 2004 09:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Elephant dot co dot bastard uk. GO AWAY YOU HORRIBLE LITTLE MAN.

― cis (cis), Friday, 28 May 2004 16:36 (twenty-two years ago)

The new Tylenol PM commercial: "I wasn't the kind of person who took sleeping pills... and I didn't want to become one." (Ooh yes, because everyone who takes an Ambien to help them get to sleep once every couple of weeks is a SKARY KRAZY DRUG ATTIC)

The other part of the commercial I hate is when it goes to the voiceover announcer dude and the camera does a tight closeup of the actress who's giving the viewers at home that creepy intense self-righteously "compassionate" look. I get really unnerveed whenever commercials do this. No. Fuck you. You're not "relating." Go away.

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Sunday, 30 May 2004 10:05 (twenty-two years ago)

for real tho, what "kind of person" takes sleeping pills? cunt.

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Sunday, 30 May 2004 10:13 (twenty-two years ago)

I am TOTALLY LOVING the DEVIL CHILD in the Penalty Shoot Out game adverts on telly at the moment.

― Madchen (Madchen), Sunday, 30 May 2004 10:43 (twenty-two years ago)

ambien attakk!!! ambien is so great, it's like fried eggs on a plate without the plate!! it is also like coke's younger prettier sister who is also retarded

― ARL (Adrian Langston), Sunday, 30 May 2004 10:49 (twenty-two years ago)

i have gauzy dreams about that time i snorted ambien and my nose didn't bleed, and i felt like adrian w.k.

― ARL (Adrian Langston), Sunday, 30 May 2004 10:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Even four years later I am still haunted by those ridiculously 'edgy' 'I'm-you-in-20-years' ads for a finance company (I think) which flooded the last Olympics coverage. The 'future apparitions' in a couple of cases were nearly a foot shorter or taller than the poor unsuspecting member of the public they were assailing. All that ladled-on 'attitude' just made the ads even more irritating, pretentious and pointless.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Sunday, 30 May 2004 11:50 (twenty-two years ago)

one month passes...

Right. I'm reviving this because this morning when I was in a reasonably good mood from having sat on my very own seat on the bus and read a good book for quarter of an hour, I then had to go down into Holloway Road tube station and be confronted by an enormous Jack Daniels poster stuck all over the far wall of the tunnel. Arrgh. Those f#ckers haven't changed their advertising style for about 20 years, and it just gets more and more annoying. Oooh yes, I'm terribly impressed by the fact that 'Mr Jack' set up a band for musical incompetents to play at weddings, political rallies, lynchings et c., and I can really see how that translates into a worldwide sense of community through drinking your horrible stinking crappy booze. I get really irate when it's sodding 'Jack Daniel's Month' because 'we sorta don't know exactly when he was born because the county records office burnt down'. Enormous corporations pretending to be folksy, cutesy, handmade, all that shite, it simply drives me insane. Yes, Ben & Jerry's, I really believe that each tub of your revoltingly sweet and overpriced ice-cream is lovingly handmade, and that the end consumer gets a different amount of walnuts/marshmallows/whatever depending on 'who' made it. A CRAPPING ENORMOUS MACHINE MADE IT. Jesus.

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 10:39 (twenty-one years ago)

seven months pass...

dear god the creepy ol' six flags guy is back. he makes me want to run from their park.

― Miss Misery (thatgirl), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 04:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Any commercial featuring schmucks making wise through the drive-thru speaker with underpaid teenaged fast-food employees. YOU JUST PWNED SASHONNA, SEVENTEEN-YEAR OLD MOTHER OF TWO. YOU WISENHEIMER!!!

It was mentioned above, but I'll add this: thetruth.com makes me wanna smoke three packs a day.

I would like to take this moment to tell FOX that I will never watch that "House" doctor show. CRAZY DOC W/ 'TUDE!

This is a local market thing, so only those in Indianapolis, Memphis, and Little Rock may shudder at these two words: WATSON's GIRL

Boston Market ads. Why? BECAUSE THERE ARE NO BOSTON MARKETS IN MY TOWN AND THE HAM LOOKS SO SUCCULENT!

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 19:48 (twenty-one years ago)

I could've swore like ALL Boston Markets closed down a LONG time ago.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 19:54 (twenty-one years ago)

I wouldn't know. The nearest one to me is located in Springfield, Missouri.

http://www.bostonmarket.com/img/sub/locations.jpg

AMONG OTHER THINGS, DAMMIT!

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 20:02 (twenty-one years ago)

I am enthralled with all men's razor campaigns. They're always made up to look super-futuristic and Matrix-y, with big-ass flying razors screaming through the air like WOAH CHECK IT OUT MY FUCKING RAZOR WAS MADE BY LOCKHEED MARTIN or some shit. Then it ends with a hot-assed chick in a nightgown or half-buttoned man's shirt stroking the dude's chin all swooningly.

The one with the body-painted female aliens admiring the protagonist's incredibly advanced shaving technology is pretty much the best of the bunch.

On the other hand, I fucking hate these local furniture store commericals where the owner insists on spotlighting his two young children prominently — and one of them has Down's Syndrome. I know is shouldn't creep me out, but GOD is it creepy.

― sugarpants (sugarpants), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 20:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Boston Market is worse than airline food. How can you ruin mac and cheese???

― The Argunaut (sexyDancer), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 20:12 (twenty-one years ago)

OMG that kid doesn't have down syndrome, he is half Skexis from Dark Crystal!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 20:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Pleasant, are you referring to "cool dude asshole Subway spokesman" cracking wise at the drive-thru with his "bros"? I hate that guy.

― Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 20:24 (twenty-one years ago)

And he knows the Subway girl by name? "Hey, Shari. Just the usual for me..." Cuh-LAAAASS-seeee.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 20:25 (twenty-one years ago)

As far as local ones go, the most hilariously awful are the Division of Solid Waste public service announcements about proper use of the Lenny/Rosie/Herbie with the blonde actor girl way overenunciating the thing about how the Herbie "is ONly suPOsed to BE for TRAYASH".

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 20:30 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.animationartgallery.com/images/SIM/SIMP788.gif http://www.ket.org/pressroom/special/poof/Poof_imagesd_0150.jpg http://www.aaca.org/junior/starcars/herbie/herbie2.jpg

For those of us outside Kentuckiana, what the hell are you talking about, nick?

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 20:39 (twenty-one years ago)

The Old Navy ads were, for a short while, phenomenal. Anyone who fails to see this is delusional and possibly homophobic. My friend Matt actually said he thought those ads were "designed to turn America gay," and I was like "what are you talking about, thilly."

I suspect there are similar minds at work in the new Burger King ads. You know the ones I'm talking about? I think they're incredible!

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 20:44 (twenty-one years ago)

what about that jamster ringtone? i wrote myspace about that one saying i fucking hate it and it makes me leave their site immediately because there's no way to turn it off. next time i was on, the ad was there but silent. i fantasize that was all due to me.

the campaign/business idea that was always my biggest peeve was the washington mutual one saying how their atm machine was free for other bank customers. WTF??? that just keeps everyone from banking with them. why buy the cow, etc. whereas they charge their own sucker customers like me when they use other bank atms. grrr.

i actually like the creepy 6 flags guy.

― lolita corpus (lolitacorpus), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 20:47 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh, that British Gas (?) advert with Brenda Blethyn as some sort of corporate motivation type person. WHAT ARE YOU DOING WOMAN?

― ailsa (ailsa), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 20:59 (twenty-one years ago)

There's a local radio spot series for Mattress Discounters that makes me want to drive me car into a wall at 120mph. "You're killing me Larry" should make any Angeleno cringe - not sure how far their reach is, but I will NEVER, EVER buy anything from them.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 21:04 (twenty-one years ago)

the new carls jr. ad with the talking fetus in the womb is fucking creepy and makes me want to not buy anything ever again.

― Dude, are you a 15 year old asian chick? (jingleberries), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 21:07 (twenty-one years ago)

Lenny = yard-waste recepticle
Rosie = recycling
Herbie = solid waste

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 21:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh. Well that makes sense.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 21:32 (twenty-one years ago)

The only good ads show people doing things with a grimace on their face, and then the sound of a record needle being dropped and then the same people doing the same thing only now with a smile.

― David Allen (David Allen), Tuesday, 15 March 2005 21:38 (twenty-one years ago)

I too love the "creepy old guy" Six Flags ads. They're just about the only good thing I can currently associate the chain of theme parks with these days.

Other ads that raise my ire:

The UPS Store commercial with the two little smug bratlings in the back giving their mom hell, where she then bribes these two "precious darlings" with the promises of a puppy for each of them if they behave while they go inside to mail off a package to the grandmother -- and, at the very end, you see this poor woman struggling to walk two puppies. Mere words on a screen cannot accurately depict the raw screams of frustration, horror, and terror from this commercial.

I usually like most of the Reddi-Whip commercials (inoffensive stuff, really), except there's this one with the dad and the three or four boys where the oldest boy is EXCEEDINGLY selfish with the Reddi-Whip that makes me wish there was some sort of technology available to wring the boy's neck and slap that ineffective dad silly.

I second the Permasmile Bob commercials mention, BTW.

The T-Mobile ads are really annoying too, but not really so much for Catherine Zeta-Jones (who takes such a minor role in those ads).

OH! And those car commercials -- I think they're for Chrysler or Plymouth -- where they show these engineers employed by the auto company who have to deal with these snot-nosed, annoying, pushy, demanding, bratty little kids, ESPECIALLY the one with the three little terrors who look way too happy to see vehicles crashing.

Oh, and am I the only person out there who wishes that in-vehicle DVD players were forever banned off the face of this planet? I mean, God, kids today don't read for pleasure ENOUGH, and now there's this thing that's actively discouraging kids from reading at a time traditionally regarded as a great time to read? I'm not normally one to root for criminals, but when I hear local news reports of vehicle break-ins where thieves make off with the in-vehicle DVD player systems, I feel quite happy for the thugs and hope the clueless vehicle owners don't end up replacing the systems.

― Surreal Addiction (Dee the Lurker), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 09:16 (twenty-one years ago)

the new carls jr. ad with the talking fetus in the womb is fucking creepy and makes me want to not buy anything ever again.

-- Dude, are you a 15 year old asian chick? (still.beven...) (webmail), March 15th, 2005 1:07 PM.

OTMFM. Also, why are they advertising a $6.00 burger like it's something special? It's a SIX DOLLAR FUCKING HAMBURGER! That's not good, it's just overpriced.

― Remy (null) (x Jeremy), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 09:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Ha ha ha. Most of the ads I mentioned revolve around little kids! I guess I reallyd on't like them or something. ;) (Though I do love the ads for peanut butter as well as the ones for Oreos, and they almost always feature young children, so, well, yeah.)

More local: THANK GOD you don't know the horror of World Car Center's "Oh God this is annoying even for a local car dealership's ad campaign" commercials. Which is totally inexcusable, esp since another car dealership in town, Ancira, has really great commercials.

Oh, and PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE destroy any/all "personal injury lawyer" commercials! Again, this is local, but... Wayne Wright? I have a special finger just for you and it ain't the index, ring, pinky, or thumb.

― Surreal Addiction (Dee the Lurker), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 09:21 (twenty-one years ago)

This one looks like a movie poster:
http://m2.doubleclick.net/829496/ADVT336x280.gif

― 57 7th (calstars), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 13:05 (twenty-one years ago)

There is a Sultana Bran ad that has taken 'Heard it through the Grapevine' and changed the words in to a little advertising ditty. It makes me homicidal.

― Nellie (nellskies), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 13:17 (twenty-one years ago)

There's a new magazine called Full House which has what sounds suspiciously like Suggs singing "Full House" to the tune of Our House". Horrible.

Ooh, I hate that car insurance one with Craig Cash "I ran into an old friend in town today..." gaaahhhh!!!

― ailsa (ailsa), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 13:20 (twenty-one years ago)

I am collating a list of all UK commercials in which the protagonists dance unnecessarily. I'm not crazy about the ones set at dances etc., but it's where happy couples in cheap holiday parks start wal;tzing to indicate their sheer thrilledness, or yoghurt-drinkers shimmy and boogie their newfound bacterial chums down the duodenum.

Pick of the bunch, I think, is the ad for Gaviscon (I think) in which a hott traffic policewoman busts her funky moves while "What a Feeling" blares in the background, and an athletic black man does the air splits for no reason AT ALL.

― Markelby (Mark C), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 13:28 (twenty-one years ago)

That Strongbow ad (UK) with the whale and the tongue and the twats. It's so pointless and ill-conceived as to actually be really offensive.

― Huey (Huey), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 13:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Yes, you're right.

I have been insured by both elephant and Admiral but I don't think I could bring myself to go with them again after their ads. Though I suppose at 1.30 in the afternoon they're both a shining example of products that might actually be useful to the purchaser, rather than the soul-destroying theft and unhappiness being hawked by all the money-lenders at that time of day.

― Markelby (Mark C), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 13:36 (twenty-one years ago)

That ::name of broadband provider deleted:: one with "Nervous Breakdown" as the soundtrack. That really really winds me up. To make it even worse, I think they're one of ours. Grrrrr.

Adverts have started offending me on a whole new level again.

― Masonic Cathedral (kate), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 13:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Cilit Bang! Bang!

(That's actually kind of captivating as the makers have obv. never really got to grips with production values.)

I loathe the Herbal Essences ads. Hate, hate, hate. Yes, ha ha, organic rhymes with orgasmic, we GET IT. It wasn't funny four years ago and it's not now. Also the use of the 'comedy' elderly probably Jewish couple makes me very uncomfortable.

― Anna (Anna), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 13:55 (twenty-one years ago)

incidentally (and i don't mean to make anyone who slated him upthread feel bad here!) i heard the young chap who fronted those elephant.co.uk adverts passed away a while back

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 14:06 (twenty-one years ago)

i keep thinking the Cilit Bang adverts are a jokey viral meme thing for something else. i can't believe they're on the level.

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 14:08 (twenty-one years ago)

They do have a huge air of spoof about them don't they?

― Anna (Anna), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 14:34 (twenty-one years ago)

the guy who plays the devil whining "24 hours! what am i gonna do for 24 hours?" really reminds me of Simon (or Trevor) out of Trevor & Simon

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 14:37 (twenty-one years ago)

that advert is like:

your heartburn will return, after 24 hours.

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 14:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Reading in the car makes me and most people I've ever talked to car sick.

― David Allen (David Allen), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 14:46 (twenty-one years ago)

yeh i can't read on road vehicles - i wish i'd had a video screen in my parents car when i were't lad

― Sven Bastard (blueski), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 14:50 (twenty-one years ago)

I think, watching an in-car video screen would have made me car-sick just as much as reading did

(mind you, I was particularly bad - sometimes just the smell of the inside of the car on a hot day was enough to make me feel a bit nauseated.)

― caitlin (caitlin), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 14:56 (twenty-one years ago)

I wish I had nintendo in the car when I was wee.

― Dr. Eldon Tyrell (ex machina), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 15:02 (twenty-one years ago)

I hate any ads where they portray simple daily tasks as being incredibly difficult just because the makers of some product have found some way to make them a tiny bit easier.

There's some women's razor ad, for instance, which shows women dropping soap and falling over because they are tards. It implies that it's the razor that's at fault, and if you just had this new one, everything would be okay. Bollox.

And like that one for some plug in air freshener which has the guy bringing the extension cord upstairs. If only it could be simpler!

And, while I'm on the subject of air fresheners, what is that thing puffing out that keeps those badly-dubbed people so entranced?

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 15:04 (twenty-one years ago)

That Woman's razor gel ad that goes "I'M YOUR VENUS; I'M YOUR BJDFASJDASD"

― Dr. Eldon Tyrell (ex machina), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 15:08 (twenty-one years ago)

incidentally (and i don't mean to make anyone who slated him upthread feel bad here!) i heard the young chap who fronted those elephant.co.uk adverts passed away a while back

Isn't this an urban myth, that he died in a crash in an uninsured car?

― ailsa (ailsa), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 15:21 (twenty-one years ago)

It is now.

― alix (alix), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 15:23 (twenty-one years ago)

I love those shows were they present an anthology of advertisements and call it "World's funniest commercials" or something. The best part is when they something before commercials like "And now, for more commercials."

― David Allen (David Allen), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 15:23 (twenty-one years ago)

OK, some google research on the elephant guy shows that, across various forums (fora?) one person thinks he died in an uninsured car, one person thinks he died of cancer, and someone believes his parents allowed the adverts to go on after his death because they liked seeing him on the TV.

― ailsa (ailsa), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 15:26 (twenty-one years ago)

I suspect there are similar minds at work in the new Burger King ads.

http://www.boardsmag.com/screeningroom/commercials/1580/

FUCKED UP

― Allyzay Dallas Multi-Pass (allyzay), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 15:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Did anybody mention the Lime Coke ads with "You Put De Lime In De Cocconut" playing yet? I think I hate that commercial because I hate the song so much.

― Raymond Cummings (Raymond Cummings), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 16:57 (twenty-one years ago)

I did a double-take there when I saw who directed that BK commercial.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 17:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Ha I guess that should have been obvious! I love the burger-tree.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 17:12 (twenty-one years ago)

french fries grow like weeds
WEED

― Silky Sensor (sexyDancer), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 17:21 (twenty-one years ago)

I have yet to notice trains of ladies with nice cabooses at any Burger King, I would like to sue them for false advertising.

― Allyzay Dallas Multi-Pass (allyzay), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 17:25 (twenty-one years ago)

this ad for, um, cardboard boxes featuring muhammad ali and alicia silverstone

― j blount (papa la bas), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 17:26 (twenty-one years ago)

(It's David LaChappelle, though.)

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 18:21 (twenty-one years ago)

which is why it is obvious!

http://www.davidlachapelle.com/

― Allyzay Dallas Multi-Pass (allyzay), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 18:50 (twenty-one years ago)

I hate any ads where they portray simple daily tasks as being incredibly difficult just because the makers of some product have found some way to make them a tiny bit easier.

I LOVE those ads. I imitate them at home - whenever I can't do something simple like open a tin can, I throw everything down and scream "Enough! Why can't someone invent a can opener that WORKS!"

(Oh yes, life with me is a rollercoaster ride!)

http://www.seenontv.com/prod-pages/images1/SmartSpin-Thumb.jpg

― dave225 (Dave225), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 18:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Fucking National Lottery shite with that unicorn (or is it a horse? I can't remember) called 'Lucky' and that woman from Cold Feet. WHO is the target audience? How many people do they think are sitting around at home saying 'Oh look it's our mate, Lucky, the amusing unicorn/horse thing - and he's got covered in snow! Ha-ha-ha! Let's buy loads of lottery tickets' ???

― The Horse of Babylon (the pirate king), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 18:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Remy, you do know that the Six Dollar Burger doesn't cost $6?

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 19:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Reading in the car makes me and most people I've ever talked to car sick.

Really? See, I don't know if I can do this now that I have to drive myself everywhere and the only reading I do is done when I'm stuck behind someone at a red light, but when I was a passenger, I could read while riding in the vehicle and most of the time I wouldn't feel the slightest bit car sick. Mind you, if it was the middle of summer and I was either very hungry or very thirsty, I would feel it, but I could read and not feel ill most of the time.

(Ha ha ha -- I wasn't even aware vehicles could have smells until we got our first "new" vehicle! Mom and Dad were incredibly mindful of cleanliness inside and outside the vehicle, so there was no room for smells to develop aside from a vague "clean" smell.)

― Surreal Addiction (Dee the Lurker), Thursday, 17 March 2005 02:54 (twenty-one years ago)

"I hate any ads where they portray simple daily tasks as being incredibly difficult just because the makers of some product have found some way to make them a tiny bit easier."

haha we saw one that might be the worst - this faucet attachment that makes your faucet into a makeshift water fountain. For the "incredibly difficult before-scenario" they had this guy kneeling down contorting his head under the sink to drink(?). He wasn't a plumber or anything, I guess they're trying to refer to some previous contraption that purported to work like THEIRS does.

― tremendoid (tremendoid), Thursday, 17 March 2005 03:38 (twenty-one years ago)

McDonalds new supersizeme-repellent ads with the vaguely anti-corporate bonehead trying to convince his down-to earth chicken nugget loving friend they only taste good cos of some conspiracy. Fuck them.

― tremendoid (tremendoid), Thursday, 17 March 2005 03:48 (twenty-one years ago)

I can't stand the new Herbal Essences ad. with Ashanti in it, where she pours way too much shampoo into her hand and it keeps gooping over the sides... it's pretty sick.

― scout (scout), Thursday, 17 March 2005 07:23 (twenty-one years ago)

"No, I asked you to put a 'quote' on my desk".

Genius

― Ste (Fuzzy), Thursday, 17 March 2005 09:59 (twenty-one years ago)

they had this guy kneeling down contorting his head under the sink to drink(?).

Wouldn't it be great if Arcoroc or someone did a pisstake of that ad, where the guy bent down to drink and then someone came in and glassed him.

"Use a glass, fucko!" could be the strapline.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Thursday, 17 March 2005 10:11 (twenty-one years ago)

The Burger King commercial where the wiseass boss insults his underlings by making them "reel in" their fish sandwiches and mocking them when they knock over stuff, or firing them for simply thinking of a number.

They just remind me of how low my expectations are for the American version of "The Office".

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Thursday, 17 March 2005 17:09 (twenty-one years ago)

It's actually pretty good!

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Thursday, 17 March 2005 17:44 (twenty-one years ago)

they had this guy kneeling down contorting his head under the sink to drink(?)

Wait I've got a good product for this, it's called a GLASS.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Thursday, 17 March 2005 18:22 (twenty-one years ago)

The T-Mobile ads are really annoying too, but not really so much for Catherine Zeta-Jones

she is completely Jar Jar Binks-ed into these ads at the end, it's pretty good editing but there's still something off about her movements and the way she's standing on the incredibly white background. I'm sure when they got her to sign on as spokeswoman they agreed "Oh no Ms. Zeta-Jones will not have to actually come into contact with the commercial actors!"

― kyle (akmonday), Thursday, 17 March 2005 18:46 (twenty-one years ago)

the Burger King commercial when the dude wakes up next to the 'King' in bed is fucking hilarious. Its like why is the creepmaster in my bed offering me a crossainwhich and the OH SHIT HE JUST TOUCHED MY HAND snippet of homoeroticism. SO AWESOME.

― Dude, are you a 15 year old asian chick? (jingleberries), Thursday, 17 March 2005 20:44 (twenty-one years ago)

she is completely Jar Jar Binks-ed into these ads at the end

Totally OTM! I always watch these ads now to try to figure out whether she's really in it, as I think she is actually with the other actors in a few of them.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Thursday, 17 March 2005 20:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Wasn't this ad shoot where CZJ was getting stalked?

― Curious George Finds the Ether Bottle (Rock Hardy), Thursday, 17 March 2005 20:59 (twenty-one years ago)

for those in the UK....
"calm down dear, it's only a commercial..."
*must kill michael winner. must kill michael winner*

NO! The new one! Michael Winner in drag feeding cheese to the mouse on his computer "calm down dear, it's not a real mouse". I think he's got some kind of bet on with himself as to how bad he can make a commercial.

― ailsa (ailsa), Thursday, 17 March 2005 21:49 (twenty-one years ago)

The only thing worse than the Michael Winner adverts are the SPOOF Michael Winner in the More Than adverts blustering on about FOUR YEARS!!! and getting pissed on by that stupid dog.

In fact, I hate ALL ads featuring that stupid "lucky" dog.

― Masonic Cathedral (kate), Friday, 18 March 2005 11:41 (twenty-one years ago)

"She looks worried. I'm not."

Actually, she looks like she's going to kill you if your two pink-clad goons would stop restraining her. Let's see Vanish Oxy-action get those stains out.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Friday, 18 March 2005 11:50 (twenty-one years ago)

Cunt buys his cunt girlfriend a bunch of cheap cunting petrol station flowers. Cunt!

― Markelby (Mark C), Friday, 18 March 2005 12:53 (twenty-one years ago)

That insane "keep blowing stuff up" ad. Ridiculously stupid ad for what seems like a really pointless and tasteless game. And they sometimes show it during Hollyoaks which seems a little irresponsible.

― Crackity (Crackity Jones), Friday, 18 March 2005 14:20 (twenty-one years ago)

LandRover using the Sonics' "Have Love Will Travel" is currently making my homicidal.

the tendercrispbaconcheddarranch BK commerical is still fascinating me though. Have yet to try the sandwich.

― Miss Misery (thatgirl), Monday, 21 March 2005 06:17 (twenty-one years ago)

The new Hummer ad where nature sounds are worked into scenes of the car being built in-factory. Probably the closest 99 percent of those behemoths will come to being near a natural environment. Pisses me off to no end when I see it.

― sugarpants: the luscious ingenue (sugarpants), Monday, 21 March 2005 15:57 (twenty-one years ago)

HP advert advertising things that Britain is apparently best at, hen nights, white vans, wedding punch ups, and something else i cannot even be bothered to remember.

awful, just awful.

― Ste (Fuzzy), Monday, 21 March 2005 16:10 (twenty-one years ago)

The Pot Noodle Horn. Ick. (Ste OTM about the HP ad, I had blanked that from my memory)

― ailsa (ailsa), Monday, 21 March 2005 16:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Footballers wives was the other 'great british creation' WTF ?!?

― Ste (Fuzzy), Monday, 21 March 2005 16:16 (twenty-one years ago)

oh god it has to be Subway, now and forever. they've never had good ads, ever.

PP i live in minnesota and we have much WATSON'S GIRL!! my ex used to yell at the tv "look at these fucking titties...AT WATSONS!" or "put your dick in my mouth...AT WATSONS!" whenever one of those ad came on. try it, it's fun!

― f--gg (gcannon), Monday, 21 March 2005 17:41 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm only repeating unsubstantiated rumored heresy, but word on the streets is that she's doing Reggie Miller.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Monday, 21 March 2005 18:36 (twenty-one years ago)

What could possibly ever be worse than Outback Steakhouse's radio ads. The latest jingle, in super triple fake Oz accent "It's an Outback Easter Sunday, a family and fun day, it's the number one day, to share a juicy steak."

― Aaron A., Monday, 21 March 2005 19:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Nothing has put me off eating at Subway more than the food shown on their TV adverts.

(even the ILX threads about how awful their food can be)

― caitlin (caitlin), Monday, 21 March 2005 22:39 (twenty-one years ago)

That cunting one with the screeching American kid telling his dog how the dog can't have an Oreo 'cause "MOM SAID, MOM SAID CHOCOLATE ISN'T GOOD FOR DOGS". I fucking hate it and want to kill him and play around in his blood.

Also the billboards for Il Primo smallgoods, with a weird-looking child and a sandwish with *way* too much ham.

― Sasha (sgh), Monday, 21 March 2005 22:57 (twenty-one years ago)

I've never lived in a place that had so many jingles on TV. They are infectous. 24 hours a day I have them stuck in my head, especially SAVE BIG MONEY AT MENDARDS.

― Jeff-PTTL (Jeff), Monday, 21 March 2005 23:02 (twenty-one years ago)

It was mentioned above, but I'll add this: thetruth.com makes me wanna smoke three packs a day.

Hear hear. Especially the new PSAs presenting scheming tobacco execs in the format of an over-laughtracked sitcom.

― j.lu (j.lu), Tuesday, 22 March 2005 20:13 (twenty-one years ago)

some people waiiiit a lifetime for a moment like thiiiiis....

― Blossom in Paris (Jody Beth Rosen), Tuesday, 22 March 2005 20:16 (twenty-one years ago)

and the one with "rhapsody in blue." i fucking hate "rhapsody in blue."

― Blossom in Paris (Jody Beth Rosen), Tuesday, 22 March 2005 20:19 (twenty-one years ago)

OMFG what is the ad with that horrible song with the lyrics "this is howww liiiife should beeee" that sounds like a horrible Blur Leisure outtake? Destroy with impunity!!

― Aaron A., Tuesday, 22 March 2005 22:16 (twenty-one years ago)

Progressive! Jeezis.

― Stupornaut (natepatrin), Friday, 1 April 2005 05:02 (twenty-one years ago)

I also dislike anything that advertises itself as "the [X] that thinks it's a [Y]!"

"Tigerwash! The car wash that thinks it's a handwash!"

First of all, it thinks it's washing my hands? Surely that's not going to give my car a thorough going over, is it?

And second of all, the car wash THAT THINKS? I expect Linda Hamilton to come round and kill it before it squishes me to death in my car.

Also I keep seeing "hand wash" as "hand job".

I spend too much time at the petrol station.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Friday, 1 April 2005 07:55 (twenty-one years ago)

three months pass...

It seems that the weird old guy who does those Six Flags commercials was just convicted of three counts of manslaughter, apparently he planned a Ku Klux Klan killing of civil rights activists.

Here's a funny article at the Weekly Dig which mentions they blared the Vengaboys song as he was leaving the court and the odl guy apparently lost it. I can't tell if they are taking the piss or not.

― Michael F Gill (Michael F Gill), Saturday, 2 July 2005 23:27 (twenty years ago)

Uhm look at the last post :)

seperated at birth!?

― svend (svend), Sunday, 3 July 2005 00:51 (twenty years ago)

the new Yop adverts, singing 'Gimme Yop' to the tune of 'gimme hope, johanna'. classic anti-apartheid song used to sell yogurty breakfast drinks. and those mouths.

― koogs (koogs), Sunday, 3 July 2005 12:48 (twenty years ago)

That new Verizon mobile commercial with the miniature celebrities is absolute balls. Especially when you consider how much money they must have spent on it (Kid Rock, Shaq, etc.)

― Hurting (Hurting), Sunday, 3 July 2005 14:40 (twenty years ago)

The gay-specific "pen pals" commercial advertising what a wonderful place Philadelphia is: the smug way the guy rejects the cute girl's eye-contact is such a turn-off.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Sunday, 3 July 2005 14:48 (twenty years ago)

Yop advert: example of current advertising trend utilising really cheap CGI to make dogs, babies etc. grin wildly and terrifyingly at the prospect of money off an ugly sofa.

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Monday, 4 July 2005 09:34 (twenty years ago)

Anything to do with coca cola, they’re shite. What’s all this strangers giving strangers bottles of coke? Nonsense!

― not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Monday, 4 July 2005 09:42 (twenty years ago)

"Noooooooooooooooooooooooo does buying car insurance drive you crazy?"

― Ste (Fuzzy), Monday, 4 July 2005 09:48 (twenty years ago)

the new Yop adverts, singing 'Gimme Yop' to the tune of 'gimme hope, johanna'. classic anti-apartheid song used to sell yogurty breakfast drinks. and those mouths.
-- koogs

These really give me the creeps. I can't watch them at all, flesh crawling etc. Won't ever be able to even think about drinking Yop without vomiting ever again.

― Anna (Anna), Monday, 4 July 2005 11:55 (twenty years ago)

THose ads for 3 phones don't work. Crazy funny japanese ad != crazy funny english ad! Sort it out!

― Come Back Johnny B (Johnney B), Monday, 4 July 2005 11:59 (twenty years ago)

i like the big handed girl one, especially the long version with the 'tee hee hee' subtitle as she's being dragged off. but yes, the singing cherry, dreadful.

― koogs (koogs), Monday, 4 July 2005 12:10 (twenty years ago)

I rather like them. I also like their radio ads - I find the small creatures endearing. I know this makes me unsuitable for life in a normal community, but there you go.

― Anna (Anna), Monday, 4 July 2005 12:19 (twenty years ago)

Lamest radio ad ever - it's great! http://www.luckykazoo.com/media/2005/07/worst-jingle-ever.html

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Monday, 4 July 2005 16:03 (twenty years ago)

xpost: Those Yop ads are surely the devil's work. DESTROY.

And the new "Oh Canada, this country's home to me" tourism campaign make me want to pound nails into my forehead.

― Tantrum The Cat (Tantrum The Cat), Monday, 4 July 2005 16:12 (twenty years ago)

So is there a racial angle to the yop ads? Big lips and black-sounding voices singing a black-centric song? Surely there can't be?

(I like the 3 ads too, mostly)

― Markelby (Mark C), Monday, 4 July 2005 16:35 (twenty years ago)

i really don't like the ad for some online insurance company (esure?) that has a crappy claymation mouse inside the computer mouse. don't know why it bothers me, but it's just so long and dumb.

there's also an ad i've only seen in the cinema, which makes me laugh at its crapness...it's for a laptop computer, and the main point of the ad is that the computer's high tech features: it plays CDs! you can play games on it! you can even watch MOVIES on it!

i wonder if there's anyone in the audience that thinks 'brilliant! why doesn't my computer do those amazing things. i'll rush right out and buy this!'

― colette (a2lette), Monday, 4 July 2005 19:46 (twenty years ago)

I'm annoyed by the latest scheme by U.S. car companies, who have sunk to bringing out the "employee discount" sale, where you get the same price the employees of the company do. I think Buick or GM started it, and I've quickly seen 3 or 4 copycat commercials from rival companies. Way to boost the moral of your employee there.

― Michael F Gill (Michael F Gill), Monday, 4 July 2005 20:41 (twenty years ago)

Yeah I was thinking the same thing the other day. They actually make me angry on behalf of those employees. Accurate or not, I mean, that's the impression that they leave - that of the big corporation screwing over its little guys to make those extra sales. Seems asinine when such a large portion of their customers are themselves "the little guys".

― Kim (Kim), Monday, 4 July 2005 22:45 (twenty years ago)

*Overstock.com's "All About the O" with the woman dressed in white in a tryina-be-all-sexual-but-failing hushed tone and then she's naked with a necklace and a gold "O" around her neck saying "And...it's all about the gold" and then and then I WANT TO DESTROY MY HOUSE.

*Those Dodge commercials where the fat husband and frail blonde wife playing the role of Fat Husband and Frail Blonde Wife. GUYS LIKE STEAK AND POWERFUL CARS, WOMEN BE WANTING ROOM FOR THE KIDS.

― Bruce Bwned (Matt Chesnut), Tuesday, 5 July 2005 00:49 (twenty years ago)

^^ "are playing"

Matter of fact, all Dodge commercials.

*Pepto Bismol, wherein sotre clerks do a dance indicating their digestive troubles. It's like the Macarena-meets-Down's Syndrome.

― Bruce Bwned (Matt Chesnut), Tuesday, 5 July 2005 00:52 (twenty years ago)

Ha ha ha. I was going to post about these very commercials here on this thread! Which tells you just how much I hate them, that I would still find myself repulsed by these ads even now. And now I know which car company foisted them upon the public -- Toyota. I swear to God, as all of you as my witness, I will never buy a Toyota ever in my entire life because of how much I am repulsed by those ads.

I don't think you're getting why they're doing this -- to bolster sales at GM, which would only help the employees out in the long run. I'm sure they would rather the public get the same discount they get than to end up pink-slipped and trying to bust their asses finding new employment. And so far, it's working; GM sales have skyrocketed 40% over those of last quarter, IIRC. And for someone such as myself, someone who is very much biased toward GM vehicles (I am my father's daughter in my loyalty toward the GM range), I applaud any advertising decision that would lead to a large increase in GM sales.

THANK YOU! I hate those ads too.

― The Kind and Benevolent Oracle of Dee (Dee the Lurker), Tuesday, 5 July 2005 07:18 (twenty years ago)

I've become really annoyed by the new "Bev! Kev! Kev! Bev!" adverts because THEY HAVE CHANGED BEV, DID THEY THINK WE WOULD NOT NOTICE?!?!?

Also the scary dancing transformer car is back. Except it's stretching out like it's injured itself dancing. Hah.

― MIS Information (kate), Tuesday, 5 July 2005 07:21 (twenty years ago)

OTM re: Smirnoff Ice ads, Lyriquid perfection, FUCK YOU.

At least the Wkd ones were mildy amusing "There's a fella trapped in the lift"

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Tuesday, 5 July 2005 07:25 (twenty years ago)

two months pass...

Just don't ask me how I found this.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Saturday, 1 October 2005 00:20 (twenty years ago)

ihttp://sabineehrenfeld.tripod.com/pics/SABINE4.jpg

"Why do you hate me?"

― Jimmy Mod wants you to tighten the strings on your corset (The Famous Jimmy Mod), Saturday, 1 October 2005 00:44 (twenty years ago)

"Ehrenfeld is also a gun enthusiast."

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Saturday, 1 October 2005 01:46 (twenty years ago)

Newest ad campaign to set me aflame with irateness -- the ones for that new financial planning company American Express started up, the one with Spencer Davis Group's "Gimme Some Lovin'" playing in the background. Yet another way the baby boomers pretend that they're not getting oldoldoldoldold. And increasingly ever more irrelevant. And sillier. And more self-absorbed. Oink oink oink little piggies, your time for the slaughterhouse is soon to come.

Um, I do like pretty much every other ad currently playing on TV, though. Even the annoying kids in the PediaSure and Oscar Mayer (the one with the little boy with the headache-inducing yell-sing) commercials aren't really that bad comparatively.

― This Field Left Blank (Dee the Lurker), Saturday, 1 October 2005 06:06 (twenty years ago)

i'm wondering why they dusted off and trotted out Lee Iacocca NOW and paired him up with Snoop Dogg and Jason Alexander.

― gear (gear), Saturday, 1 October 2005 06:26 (twenty years ago)

THE 80S ARE BACK!!!

― jaymc (jaymc), Saturday, 1 October 2005 06:28 (twenty years ago)

seriously, it was only a matter of time, we've already seen comebacks from donald trump and alf.

― jaymc (jaymc), Saturday, 1 October 2005 06:29 (twenty years ago)

and MAX WRIGHT

http://www.geocities.com/alfwasmolested/enqcoversmsmall.jpg

― gear (gear), Saturday, 1 October 2005 06:33 (twenty years ago)

ten years pass...

Georgia Lottery has used a fire-breathing goat named Kevin for six years now. At least Kevin doesn't shit steaming piles of money the way he used to.

― Honor thy pisstake as a hidden intention. (WilliamC), Wednesday, 6 April 2016 23:32 (ten years ago)

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