your favorite lol from The Wire - nom thread

1. sheeeeeeeeeeit

2. the look on daniels' face when prez socks valchek

3. mcnultys x2 car crash

4. many, many things Bunk said. such as, any time he gestures toward his dick.

5. "He do look natural" - Slim Charles at funeral

6. "On a fuckin stairmaster"

7. avon clowning marlo during prison visit

8.
wallace: "is that your bitch?"
d'angelo: "naw nigga that's my moms"

oh yeah 7: "surpriiiiise"

9. the Herc/Carver exchange re: Olsen Twins

10. "if it wasn't for your man sergei here you and your cuz would be some cadaverous motherfuckers" (hope i got that right)

(4 is a little broad dude!)

11. kima and her girl go to the strip club w/ prez

stripper: "is this yours? yeah i wouldn't bring mine in here either. these bitches up in here are no. joke."

12. http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/5/59/Gus_triandos_59topps-568.jpg

Stringer's "fuck you detective" drawing to McNulty.

i know, i will pick the best Bunk moment after deliberation. 4 is provisional for now.

"cheese-faced bitch"

13 & 14. ^^

15. herc and carver in the security store: "hish name ish head. dick head."

16. bodie and cheese bargaining with a freaked out junkie when they have to split the towers, lol capitalism

Herc trying to pick up Beadie

Herc explaining how much he loves white boys to Kima

Herc and Carver and Fuzzy Dunlop

Herc making buys as a wigger

Bodie driving around listening to Garrison Keillor

^^^ oh shit yeah that may be it for me

omar sonning levy on the stand

aren't 9 and 12 really the same thing? I guess they're different parts of the same bit at least.

shardene appearing at the VERY END w/ freamon. damn dude!!

Bunny: "Get on with it mother f..."

avon not bunny ^^

Bodie's take on Prairie Home Companion. xpost stupid job ><

the real jay landsman being on a show where a character named jay landsman is a fat stat-obsessed porn addict

carcetti trying and repeatedly failing to process the news of mcnultys serial killer scheme

Bunk trying to set fire to his trousers in a bathtub while drink at some woman's house.

drunk

Bunny: "Get on with it mother f..."

-- The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, May 13, 2008 2:48 PM (6 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

avon not bunny ^^

-- jhøshea, Tuesday, May 13, 2008 2:53 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Link

uhhh...stringer?

lololololol

i was closer tho

11. kima and her girl go to the strip club w/ prez

stripper: "is this yours? yeah i wouldn't bring mine in here either. these bitches up in here are no. joke."

lol. I just watched that scene last week.

namond to colvin "damn u know the mayor?"

at first I gave Cursed benefit of the doubt that there was some scene I was forgetting where Colvin said that, since I don't really think of Stringer's death scene as a big LOL moment in the show's history.

"I can't WAIT to go to jail."

and of course

"Got to, man. This is America."

the church crown shooting/aftermath

kima putting together the ikea bed

btw Stringer's blood-splattered shirt from that scene is in the Baltimore Museum of Industry, I totally geeked out seeing it in person.

(i have to think of one with norman wilson, i loved that guy)

Doesn't Colvin say 'Get on with it" when he's getting his public disciplining?

Oh yeah, Norman. The discussion in the car about whether he'll be voting for Carcetti, maybe.

yeah i was racking my brain for Reg E. Cathey lols when this thread started

"hamsterdam"

Is you taken notes on a criminal fucking conspiracy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YZLLAV_R8g

i can't rep for 2 enough. i rewound and watched that like 12 times

slim charles patiently explaining to a highly agitated stringer why hed prefer not to murder a state senator

mcnulty's english accent

daniels and ronnie laffing about how fucked up she's gonna be when freamon's subpoeanas go out (more sweet than lol, but i liked it -- first moment i really believed that relationship)

mcnulty's report after that bust!!

ziggy's willy.

county cop to kima: "your partner? bit of an asshole."

Bunny: "Get on with it mother f..."
-- The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, May 13, 2008 2:48 PM (6 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

avon not bunny ^^
-- jhøshea, Tuesday, May 13, 2008 2:53 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Link

uhhh...stringer?
-- Alex in Baltimore, Tuesday, May 13, 2008 6:55 PM (8 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

No - it's Bunny Coleman! When Rawls is raking him over the coals in during COMSTAT (or whatever it was called) after the hamsterdamn fiasco.

mcnulty listening to the FBI profile of his serial killer

rawls in the gay bar

"You know who got the fattest asses and the best pussy? Midgets, nigga."

Cheese

Santangelo to Johnny the Fiend - "I hear the WMDs are the bomb."

Ziggy - "Bad advice! You motherfuckers gave me BAD ADVICE!"

I'm not going to read this poll since I'm only halfway through season 2, but nothing's cracked me up as much as the Love Child scene that lead to Ziggy getting the bad advice.

"Lay off the Greeks -- they invented civilisation."

"Yeah? And ass-fuckin' too."

"Lester, are we still police?"
"Technically, I suppose."

one of the 129387987 times rawls says "you're fucking the dog"

"You know what they call a guy who pays attention to clothes?"

"Yeah -- a grown-up."

Rawls in the gay bar.

rawls in the gay bar

-- gff, Tuesday, May 13, 2008 2:13 PM (2 hours ago)

Snoop questioning the corner boys about morning radio.

snoop buying the nailgun!

"Blue steel diamond cutter, gentlemen. Three and a half inches of blue steel diamond cutter."

"Ever noticed how 'mother of 4' is always catching hell? Huh? Murder, hit and run, burnt up in rowhouse fire, swindled by bigamists?"

yeah there are some gus in the newsroom lols but i can't remember them right off

they beat it into the ground, but i was still laughin whenever anyone said 'the dickensian aspect'

snoop was a pretty reliable source for lols

The Omar robbery where he dressed up as an old blind man.

"Do Tell"

"Either he comes home in the next five minutes or I eat my gun."

"Shot the boy Mike-Mike in his hind parts."

Cheese X3:

1.) Unless the ASPCA came and picked him up

2.) Recounting the drug heist - "Bitch pulled a gun out of her pussy! That shit was unseemly."

3.) Omar coming to sell the drugs he stole back to Prop Joe - "This is some shameless shit." (totally about the look he gives to Joe when saying it)

2 and 3 might be the same scene, I can't remember.

actually we're all forgetting:

"if snot boogie would always take the money, why'd you let him play?"
"this america, man"

"I can't WAIT to go to jail."

and of course

"Got to, man. This is America."

-- Oilyrags, Tuesday, May 13, 2008 6:57 PM (4 hours ago) Bookmark Link

never thought of that as lols

moving the desk into/out of the office

got to man this is america is almost too classic to be straight lols

mcnulty listening to the FBI profile of his serial killer

-- Jordan, Tuesday, May 13, 2008 2:09 PM (4 hours ago) Bookmark Link

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

Colvin and Carver introducing the sociologist to the 18 year old corner kid.

with the laugh track

"there's a b in subtle?"

"where did you get that baseball cap with the bill on the side?" - though mostly for carv and herc's reaction

Bunk: Awwww...fuck.
McNulty: Motherfucker.
Bunk: Fuck, fuck...motherfucker.
McNulty: Fuck.
Bunk: Hmmmmm, fuck. Fuck. fuck. fuck.
McNulty: Fuck?
Bunk: Ungh. Fuck.
McNulty: Hm. Urgh! Fuck!
McNulty: Unh-uh.
Bunk: Awwwww...fuck.
McNulty: Fuckin'. How the fuck?
Bunk: Mothafuck!
McNulty: Aw fuck! Aww fuck!
Bunk: Fuckity fuck fuck fuck fuck...fucker!
McNulty: Aww fuck.
McNulty: fuck! fuck! fuck!
Bunk: Fuuuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
Bunk: Muthafucka!
McNulty: Fuckin' A!
Bunk: Mmm-hmm!
McNulty: Shhfuck,
Bunk: ...
McNulty: Muthafucker.
Bunk: Fuck me.

For context

My favorite lol is "I can't wait to go to jail", but added this for completeness' sake.

the robert's rules of order scenes

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gE-uY7P3pe4

"he meant lexus, but he aint know it"

"And we will be brief with all of you motherfuckers. I think you know."

somewhere between sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeut and is you takin' notes on a motherfuckin' criminal conspiracy lies the truth

"yeah, omar show up, we on him like -"
"like a forty degree day!"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o1WL3CRYh0k

Rawls daintily picking up one of Landsman's titty mags and perusing its contents.

"Uh... Spot... Spot on it!"

When one of the top cops (Rawls? Valchek?) gives Norman and Carcetti some prime dish, Norm is all, "Wait for it..." until the cop is out of sight, and then they sprint off like madmen.

"Bushmills? That's Protestant whiskey."

The look on Snoop's face when she and Chris have to get rid of the nailgun.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v81/plechazunga/tybe/wire/4x08-snoop-bukkit.jpg

Bodie listening to Garrison Keilor

"Got to, man. This is America."

-- Oilyrags, Tuesday, 13 May 2008 18:57

the more i've watched that scene the funnier this line has gotten

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

komedy no votes, kudos

"Bushmills? That's Protestant whiskey."

I heard this 15 years ago from an uncle of mine.

The Boris gag still amuses me.

mcnulty listening to the FBI profile of his serial killer

Upon reflection, this may be correct. It's not a zing, but I don't think I ever laughed harder...

when getting orders to kill the senator, slim says (roughly) "that's not a hit, that's assassination!"

carver makes the hamsterdam dealers pay unemployment on their runners & lookouts. colicchio: "are you a fucking communist?"

ok ima put this together soon. can someone help me out, who said the following?

"On a fuckin stairmaster"

"cheese-faced bitch"

"hamsterdam" << i remember the scene when this name takes hold but i forget who said what

"Shot the boy Mike-Mike in his hind parts."

"there's a b in subtle?"

"he meant lexus, but he aint know it"

"Shot the boy Mike-Mike in his hind parts." - Omar at Birds trial

"there's a b in subtle?" - Herc to (I think) Carver, can't remember when.

"he meant lexus, but he aint know it"
snoop at the hardware store, the salesman calls it "the cadillac of nail guns"

"hamsterdam"
carv explaining the free zone to the hoppers, describes amsterdam, one of them picks it up as "hamsterdam"

"On a fuckin stairmaster"
bunk(?) when ray cole(?) dies

yeah i knew it was about ray cole, i think a bunch of guys say the stairmaster line actually!

"there's a b in subtle?" - Herc to (I think) Carver, can't remember when.

What! when does Bodie drive around listening to Garrison Keillor? I remember no such thing.

When he drove to Philly!

If that hadn't happened to be the episode I haven't seen in the longest time. Sheeeeeeeit, I've got to see the as soon as possible.

"You gotta find some ways to use Peanut"

"Nigga, I am NOT George Washington Carver."

Kima and McNulty zinging CSI profiler dude re: Unabomber - "That was like sixteen years, right?" Kima asks. "And then his brother ratted him out," McNulty observes.

"Nice dolphin, nigga"

It was only medium-funny in the show, but the sight of the name "Fuzzy Dunlop" here is cracking me up in retrospect.

I loled when Herc referenced "Our little adventure with Fuzzy Dunlop"

i just rewatched season 2 and loled so hard when bird is on trial and the judge asks him if he is jesus come back to life (or something) and he was like "ummmm"

I can't remember any clear lines from it, but my suggestion: when Freamon is trying to sell the pre-paid phones, and the woman who monitors/translates the wire is helping, acting very casual and unconcerned, and says something like "you know I've got the bingo tonight"

i love freamon in that scene because of his hair

Clay Davis doing his "You think I'm dunnnnnnnn!" speech multiple times in front of multiple officials.

Also Herc knocking and being excessively cautious when he goes to visit the mayor post-incident.

"yeah, andre gonna bone that skank!"

I keep thinking of weird psycho nervous-laughter moments from this that aren't funny at all -- like the guy who shoots his rival outside of the club and then turns to the girl and goes "hey, what's up?"

I keep going back to Sergei (Boris) in season 2 (I think to Fat Mike) about a dead body: Does he have hands? Does he have a face? Yes? Then he's not one of ours.

Also - one of the first coop meetings when one of the underlings is taking minutes of the meeting in accordance w/Robert's Rules of Order
Season 3's got plenty of lol-economics and business moments.
more-lol-economics: Randy discovering that he can make even more money buying candy in bulk off the internet (season 4)

Strangely, I laughed during the newspaper buyout scene when the guy says "information about COBRA benefits" -- I think it was just one of those laughter-of-recognition things on a very literal level

^^ yeah I had a similar sort of laugh when Cutty is trying to open the boxing gym and has to go the zoning department that tells him he has to get permits from other departments.

also, all the scams Bubbles and his junkie friend pull to get money - the copper pipe theft, the steal-something-and-have-the-other-guy-try-to-sell-it-back scam -- been victim to both of these.

-Clay Davis: "I'll take any motherfucker's money if he giving it away!"
-Landsman eating sushi with a fork

the copy-machine lie detector

That one was so terrible I almost felt like it had to be something that really happened.

it did - it's in david simon's book, homicide. i think he says the practice got banned by some liberal, do-good judge though.

yeah, that was a wtf lol. Most of my lols from the show were either from recognition or juxtapositions.

"For you I would suggest some pantsuits, perhaps muted in color, something to offset Detective Moreland's pinstripe lawyerly affectations and the brash tweedy impertinence of Detective Freamon"

I keep thinking this threrad is somehow about the intersection between The Wire and food.

hey yeah!

"Ain't you gonna eat them crab brains? Pussy ass white boy."

(badly paraphrased, I'm sure)

Landsmann in Season Two praising Lester's "tweedy impertinence."

Beadie reacting to the news that as many as 50,000 young women come as illegal stowaways: "What they need is a union."

"Bow-legged motherfucker. I made him walk like that."

"Heh. I want a woman with ankles, but I'm going to go home, and there's my wife."

Lester and Bunk interrogating the boat workers who pretend not to speak english.

Stringer telling D'Angelo's baby mama that D'Angelo's sweater wouldn't fit him because he's an "XL" as an "oh by the way"

also ... the ongoing travels of the surveillance van. I think in one of the later seasons (after season 2), Valchek is still getting photos of the van at various international ports.

sarahel even better than stringer saying "i'm an xl" is donette's reply! - "no doubt"

"Bitch pulled a gun out of her pussy! That shit was unseemly."

Herc and Carver meeting Bodie and Poot coming out of a film with their girlfriends. "You guys go to the movies?"

^ all time

Bunk and Prop Joe discussing Commissioner Burrell

"You know what the plural of pussy is? PUSS-EYE"

I'm rewatching the whole thing and got through season 3.

I'd almost forgotten about - the big drug bust of hamsterdam where Rawls plays Ride of the Valkyries over the loudspeaker, which made me note similarities between his character and the character Robert Duvall plays in Network.

i feel like theres another big movie where someone plays ride of valkyries while raiding and destroying, but i just cant put my finger on it.........

haha

i feel like theres another big movie where someone plays ride of valkyries while raiding and destroying, but i just cant put my finger on it.........

Yeah, I think Robert Duvall is somehow involved.

network?

uh, sorry if I'm being totally obvious.

Thought process went from Rawls playing Ride of the Valkyries as reference to Duvall playing the same in that one movie, to Duvall's character in Network that takes similar joy in being a dick and focusing on ratings.

Some Marlo flunky (Fat Andre?) explaining Spongebob Squarepants.

little kevin

herc & kids from hamsterdam back at the police station putting together faces on the suspect identification program

haha, "make his ears point up''....'give her those asian eyes like beyonce'

Bodie: I'm out here holding my Charles Dickens

I'm in the middle of revisiting season 3, and there are some doozies.

Prez is showing off by magnifying the license plate on a grainy tape:
"Nothing there. It's so tiny. No mere mortal can... You see what he just did? What? He did it again? Who is this man? Where does he come from? Can anybody stop him? Please don't hurt us. Please my eyes, my eyes. It's so big and clear and bright."
Daniels: "Sometimes, you still scare me, you know that?"

And Bunny talking with the Deacon at a billiard parlor.
B: "You hustlin'?"
D: "Educatin'."
B: "Charging for it or tuition-free?"
D: "Tuition will come back to him ten-fold in acquired wisdom."

herc & kids from hamsterdam back at the police station putting together faces on the suspect identification program

haha, "make his ears point up''....'give her those asian eyes like beyonce'

"can this thing do butts?"

And Rawls in the gay bar, obv

give her those asian eyes like beyonce'

I think the actual line is "chinese up them eyes like beyoncé"

there's a moment in i think early s.3 when bunk says kofi annan when he clearly means someone else (can't remember who) - not so much lol as a minor wtf - ain't like the bunk to be wrong

prop joe calling up the police & doing all those ridiculous voices

cosign re: landsman eating sushi with a fork

i'm convinced the ikea gag is pivotal beyond the laffs, but can't say more w/o spoiling.

spoil away, this is a poll for best bits of a show that finished nearly 18 months ago.

prop joe calling up the police & doing all those ridiculous voices

this is the best tv has to offer

Prez is showing off by magnifying the license plate on a grainy tape:
"Nothing there. It's so tiny. No mere mortal can... You see what he just did? What? He did it again? Who is this man? Where does he come from? Can anybody stop him? Please don't hurt us. Please my eyes, my eyes. It's so big and clear and bright."

^^^^ i remember rewinding this moment 3 times on first viewing

"Who is this man?"

xp sarahel ur right:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iPuWgeVOsSw

too bad it's missing the first part when they're making the guy's face, was just as funny

One of my favourites is Omar turning up at Prop Joe's, ostensibly to pick up the clock Joe's repaired for him, but actually to say he's ripping him off for loads of money. He then drops the bomb, picks up the money, and then pays for clock Joe's just repaired.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gE-uY7P3pe4

so what man? you earned that buck like a motherfucker, keep that shit

first day of school, group of very large girls taking up the entire hallway - "daaamn, these b****es are on steroids!"

that snoop sequence is absolutely a personal favorite
cadillac

there's a moment in i think early s.3 when bunk says kofi annan when he clearly means someone else (can't remember who) - not so much lol as a minor wtf - ain't like the bunk to be wrong

― W i l l, Tuesday, July 28, 2009 3:53 PM (4 days ago) Bookmark

yea he says "kofi bryant" haha