I'm Excited About Xmas Singles Chart. No, Not The Actual Chart But William Bloody Swygarts Rundown!

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I hope I get all the presents wrapped in all the excitement.

― Father Christmas, Sunday, 21 December 2003 12:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Off to a GREAT start - Erin Rocha new at #36, just as I'm upstairs trying to put the Sainsbury's stuff away. I have no idea what she sounds like. Deeeeeesaster.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 16:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Bryan from Westlife has just tipped Avid Merrion for #1, and now Wes is playing Madonna's single in full. Mmmfle.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 16:46 (twenty-two years ago)

And our Erin isn't on Soulseek...

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 16:48 (twenty-two years ago)

So now I'm having to install Kazaa. Grr.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 16:50 (twenty-two years ago)

For those in the prediction league - Madonna was #33.

And Kazaa is having problems with Erin too...

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 16:55 (twenty-two years ago)

OK, Search for Erin Rocha returns no results.

The Sun is offering a phone line to listen to the Erin Rocha single at 60p/minute.

Fucking Sainsbury's...

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 16:57 (twenty-two years ago)

And at #29, it's G-Unit.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 16:58 (twenty-two years ago)

William JUST MAKE IT UP!!!

― Tico Tico (Tico Tico), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:00 (twenty-two years ago)

What I have found out:

Erin is 16 and from Dorset. She recorded the song while on work experience. She was recently in a school production of Romeo and Juliet. Judging by the picture on her website, she is tiny.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah dude that's your review right there

(this is bringing back bad memories of trying to review Erin McKeown while knowing nothing about her)

― Ferrrrrrg (Ferg), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:04 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah, sorry about that one.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:04 (twenty-two years ago)

Still, at least you actually had her songs...

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Is this more of the 'new crooning' Alexis Petridish was on about?

― Tico Tico (Tico Tico), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:05 (twenty-two years ago)

She's a bit short for all that.

Here's Billy Mack at #26.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Well, I concluded it like 'It's quite good, this!' or something, so I suppose I dragged the quality of the publication down in revenge. Unless you didn't run it. I wouldn't've.

― Ferrrrrrg (Ferg), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Promotional Campaign For Erin Rocha (in a just world)

"16 year old Erin recorded her single on work experience in Poole."

"In Dorset?"

"I'd recommend it to anyone."

― Tico Tico (Tico Tico), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:08 (twenty-two years ago)

You are rather overestimating our quality control there. This may have been the same week I took eight hours to write 150 words on the Majesticons, concluding something like, "Oh, look, El-P. I think I heard one of his records once. 8/10".

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:09 (twenty-two years ago)

And here's the Fast Food Rockers at #25.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:10 (twenty-two years ago)

William phone The Sun and I will send you the £1.80 it costs to listen to the tune!

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Fast Food Rockers = most redundant band name ever now? Even worse than Steps after they gave up line dancing?

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:11 (twenty-two years ago)

That's not lack of quality control, that's 'endearingly haphazard!'

― Ferrrrrrg (Ferg), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Nick - fear not. Events earlier today might have provided me with a convenient fix...

There was a headline on Ceefax news last night about the Lebanon, referring to 'fast food bombers'. That confused me a bit.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:13 (twenty-two years ago)

Wee Kev is #23. Not that that matters, but hey! Wee Kev!

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Right, the shit off Starsailor has just tipped Mad World for #1. Come on you Lowestoft spandex monsters!

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Girls Aloud are #20. UB40 are #19.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Mighty Evs #18.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:22 (twenty-two years ago)

Katie Melewurrgh #17.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:26 (twenty-two years ago)

For no apparent reason, Outkast go up 6 to #16.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:31 (twenty-two years ago)

Cheeky Girls #15.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:34 (twenty-two years ago)

if you are still looking for the erin song
http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio1/chart/top40/
& click on 'listen' next to song for 30sec soundclip

― zappi (joni), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Tried that. Real Player is being a shit about loading it, though.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Westlife #14.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Cliff Richard #13.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Ultrabeat new at #12.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Blue, Stevie Wonder and Angie Stone new at #11.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:48 (twenty-two years ago)

In Prediction League news, Ultrabeat gave Alex 10 points, putting him in the lead by two points... this rundown is nailbiting in more ways than one...

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Here comes the top ten... sharp intake of breath...

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:53 (twenty-two years ago)

So to defuse the tension somewhat, the next song will be Michelle from Pop Idol's new single.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:54 (twenty-two years ago)

What does she think will be Christmas number one?

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:55 (twenty-two years ago)

He hasn't asked her who she thinks will be Christmas number one.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 17:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Blue, Stevie Wonder and Angie Stone new at #11.

wtf?!

― jed (jed_e_3), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:00 (twenty-two years ago)

She sounds a bit like Brianna Corrigan.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:01 (twenty-two years ago)

And she's just left. Just like that. Wes says nothing. To quote Bennet:

You didn't even thank her
You're a wanker

Sugababes new at #10.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Shane Richie #9.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:08 (twenty-two years ago)

Atomic Kitten new at #8.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Black Eyed Peas #7.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Faster! Faster!

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Will Young #6. Now we're hitting the business end, and Dizzee Rascal has picked Merrion for #1 too.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:19 (twenty-two years ago)

The Prediction League rests on the top 5.

#5...

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:23 (twenty-two years ago)

is...

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:23 (twenty-two years ago)

YOUR POP IDOLS!

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Faster! Faster!

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Flowersdie nicks 2 for that, no-one else gets anything. Alex still leads.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:24 (twenty-two years ago)

More crucially, FD is one of two people to have not picked the Idols for #1. Him and Ed went for the Darkness.

It's going to the wire...

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:25 (twenty-two years ago)

No-one picked Gary Jules for #1.

Alex picked the Darkness for #2.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:27 (twenty-two years ago)

What it could hinge on - Basil Brush. FC has him at #49, and Alex has him at #48.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:27 (twenty-two years ago)

FD, obviously.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Merrion is #4.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:28 (twenty-two years ago)

#3 - Kelly & Ozzy.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Which doesn't make much difference to anything. Except this is where Alex picked Gary Jules to end up. FD had him at #2.

So if Gary Jules is next, Flowersdie has won.

If The Darkness are next, we go into Basil Brush-oriented extra time.

Which I never thought I'd type either.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Y'all ready?

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Your Xmas #1...

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:36 (twenty-two years ago)

is...

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:36 (twenty-two years ago)

THE DARKNESS!!!!

FLAT CAP WINS!!!

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:37 (twenty-two years ago)

huzzah!

― lid, Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:37 (twenty-two years ago)

twinkly prettiness wins out for xmas no.1 again! (much like spice girls' two becomes 1)

― lid, Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:38 (twenty-two years ago)

It all came down to the last record, but our winner is Alex - He's fourteen points up, and even if Basil Brush was #49, he picked him at #48.

Thus, Alex In Yorkshire Somewhere is, once more, ILM King Predictist. Well done him.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:39 (twenty-two years ago)

oooff....

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Right, it's Christmas as of... now. Whoo.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Wait for the heartbeat to return to normal. Then think of something to say about the Darkness.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Then something to say about Gary Jules.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Blimey.

I remember when he was 50/1 an' all. Bugger.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Worst No.1 of the year :(

― Tico Tico (Tico Tico), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:42 (twenty-two years ago)

you have heard Changes?

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Not yet actually. But it can't be worse. The Gary Jules record hits all three of my most hated things about pop music right on the button.

― Tico Tico (Tico Tico), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:44 (twenty-two years ago)

Wes points out that the real winners are Radio 1. Yes Wes. yes, you are.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:45 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm really surprised you hate "Mad World" Tico, apart from the flat cap I can't see what there is to hate about it. Alex Parks' version is better though.

― The Lex (The Lex), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:46 (twenty-two years ago)

"Changes" is worse. Much, much worse. Ph3Ar it.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Tanya's reaction.

The Triple Wrongness of Mad World:

1/ Assumption that slower = more meaningful.
2/ Assumption that higher voice = more meaningful.
3/ Assumption that meaningful and sad > frivolous and danceable

It's also a cover not being as good as the original but that's a minor sin.

― Tico Tico (Tico Tico), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:48 (twenty-two years ago)

a crap year has been capped! (haha)

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:48 (twenty-two years ago)

OK small mercies time: he didn't ruin "Pale Shelter".

― Tico Tico (Tico Tico), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:49 (twenty-two years ago)

1/ Assumption that slower = more meaningful.
2/ Assumption that higher voice = more meaningful.
3/ Assumption that meaningful and sad > frivolous and danceable

I said these exact three things to someone just this afternoon.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Those assumptions are very wrong but I don't think "Mad World" assumes any of them!

― The Lex (The Lex), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:50 (twenty-two years ago)

The Darkness meanwhile work on the MUCH BETTER assumption that higher voice = funnier. Which it is - Aled Jones!!!!

― Tico Tico (Tico Tico), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:51 (twenty-two years ago)

WES IS PLAYING "WHERE IS THE LOVE" AGAIN.

CUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNTCUNT

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:51 (twenty-two years ago)

odds for xmas no.1 from 3 months ago

gary jules not even in the running!

― zappi (joni), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:52 (twenty-two years ago)

anyway the Cheeky Girls were robbed.

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:52 (twenty-two years ago)

right on, The Lex!!

where's the love Y'ALL?

― lid, Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:53 (twenty-two years ago)

HE'S ALREADY PLAYED IT IN THE ALBUM CHART FOR FUCK'S SAKES.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:53 (twenty-two years ago)

The Darkness also work on the false assumption that poodle-haired metal = funny and/or listenable!

High voices are only funny when they're not meant to be and even then it's only point-and-laugh funny.

William's rundowns make me so glad that I boycott Wes.

― The Lex (The Lex), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:54 (twenty-two years ago)

And now - HAVE YOURSELF A DAVE PEARCE CHRISTMAS!

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Wes is hideous.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Bah Humbug.

― Tico Tico (Tico Tico), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:56 (twenty-two years ago)

TS: Wes v Tim Kash

AAARGH

― The Lex (The Lex), Sunday, 21 December 2003 18:56 (twenty-two years ago)

I guess Tears for Fears will be putting together a new greatest hits albums now. I wonder how Gary Jule's album will do?

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 21 December 2003 19:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Shudder to think. The title is something like 'Trading Snakeoil For Wolfskin'.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 19:01 (twenty-two years ago)

T4F were meant to have a new boxed set out earlier this year anyway, but I don't think it ever emerged.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Sunday, 21 December 2003 19:02 (twenty-two years ago)

HMV 2 for £22 sale by April.

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 21 December 2003 19:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Or #1 in the album chart for 6 months.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 19:04 (twenty-two years ago)

not a chance!!!

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 21 December 2003 19:08 (twenty-two years ago)

Do not count your chickens. If I remember right, the import version was very high in Rough Trade's end-of-year sales chart.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 19:10 (twenty-two years ago)

God I hate Dave Pearce.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 19:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Fuck this shit, I'm listening to Scooter.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 19:19 (twenty-two years ago)

are those assumptions assumptions?

― cozen (Cozen), Sunday, 21 December 2003 19:24 (twenty-two years ago)

surely Gary Jules doesn't exist - it's Michael Stipe operating in disguise ?

― DJ Martian (djmartian), Sunday, 21 December 2003 19:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Also, spare a thought for Lisa Maffia, whose single would appear to have missed the top 75 entirely.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 21 December 2003 19:45 (twenty-two years ago)

haha I'm sure dave q is happy.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Sunday, 21 December 2003 20:04 (twenty-two years ago)

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