Worst Thing In This Daily Telegraph "10 ways Britpop changed modern manhood" Article

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http://www.telegraph.co.uk/men/the-filter/10744192/10-ways-Britpop-changed-modern-manhood.html
http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/02872/Untitled-1_2872518b.jpg

1. It made us patriotic

Pre-Britpop, we looked across the Atlantic for cool, exciting new stuff: be it grunge or hip-hop, action blockbusters or cult Tarantino films, Friends or The X-Files. But for five halcyon years in the mid-90s, Blighty was where it was at: Blur vs Oasis, Cool Britannia, Euro ’96, TFI Friday, Lock Stock, Spice Girls, Young British Artists, Trainspotting… We were reminded of the greatness on our own doorstep. That feeling of renewed national pride has never left us. We might again be in thrall to American tech, Italian food or Scandi design, but we’ve learnt to love our country again too. Look at London 2012 – it was well Britpop.

2. It improved our dress sense

There wasn’t just a Britpop band called Menswe@r (doesn’t that “@“ date them?): it was a glorious time for actual menswear too. Designer terrace threads by Stone Island, GioGoi, Paul Smith and Duffer of St George. Fila and Adidas trackie tops. Cords, desert boots, vintage Ts and Harrington jackets. We dressed like a cross between 60s bands, 70s teachers and 80s hooligans. It helped revive homegrown heritage labels like Clarks, Aquascutum, Doc Marten, Fred Perry and Burberry. Brit menswear has since gone from strength to strength.

3. It wasn’t to be sniffed at

“All your dreams are made / When you're chained to the mirror and the razorblade.” Ecstasy had been the drug of choice since Madchester and acid house but when Oasis arrived, it was riding on a huge snow-drift of cocaine. It suited Britpop’s cocky, beery swagger. As rock’n’roll poet Murray Lachlan Young titled his 1996 poem: “Simply Everyone’s Taking Cocaine”. It made a generation feel beautiful and invincible. Coke’s never really fallen out of fashion since.

4. It made football cool again

From Three Lions to the Gallaghers' Man City shirts, the beautiful game became linked with the music scene for the first time since George Best.

5. It revived live music

Sweaty Suede and Elastica tours. Bouncing around to Supergrass. Blur live at Mile End Stadium. Glastonbury 95, headlined by Oasis and Pulp. Britpop made us fall in love with gigs again. By 1996, the Gallagher brothers marked their imperious peak with two nights at Knebworth and there were a mad-fer-it 2.6m applications for tickets (still a record today). It kickstarted the festival boom and two decades of live music making a mint.

6. It was central to the radio revolution

In 1993, new Radio 1 controller Matthew Bannister exiled the old guard of Smashy ’n' Nicey-style DJs and replaced them with young talent like Steve Lamacq, Jo Whiley and Chris Evans — all of whom wanted to play new British music. The trickle-down is still being felt on Radios 1 and 2, 6Music, Absolute and Xfm today.

7. It made boys be boys

Sure, there were Britpop girls - Elastica’s Justine Frischmnn, say, or Louise Wener off of Sleeper - but it was mainly about lads being lads. I don’t mean that tedious “wahey, boobz and bantz!” kind of laddishess. I mean an old-fashioned, faintly roguish joy in just being a cheeky tearaway who likes football, beer, rock music and male bonding. Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Etc.

8. It made us cook

Without Britpop there would have been no Jamie Oliver: the mop-topped, bish-bash-boshing Naked Chef, riding his scooter and listening to (eek!) Toploader. And without Jamie Oliver, a generation of fellas wouldn’t be dedicated foodies. “Look at this bad boy! Wallop! Pukka!” *"Blood Sausage!" Etc.

9. It made us culturally cleverer

Britpop is often stereotyped as lumpenly thuggish but it made young men smarter too. We were inspired to explore its musical influences: not just the Beatles but The Who, The Kinks, Bowie, The Byrds, The Jam, Sex Pistols and Small Faces. In their lyrics and interviews, Damon Albarn, Brett Anderson and Jarvis Cocker were our literate, art-schoolish big brothers in the way Morrissey was a decade earlier.

10. It made us go down the pub

All we needed were cigarettes and alcohol. And if it had a jukebox too, all the better. In the late 80s and early 90s, we had our heads turned by posh bars serving poncey bottled beers and cocktails. Britpop put paid to such pretensions. After all, its spiritual epicentre was the north London neighbourhood of Camden, particularly a grotty old man’s boozer on Inverness Street called The Good Mixer. The ubiquitous, artfully distressed gastropubs of today owe a debt to “The Mixer”.

*may not have been said in the real article.

Poll Results

OptionVotes
7. It made boys be boys 19
5. It revived live music 12
8. It made us cook 11
9. It made us culturally cleverer 10
3. It wasn’t to be sniffed at 7
1. It made us patriotic 4
10. It made us go down the pub 3
2. It improved our dress sense 2
4. It made football cool again 1
6. It was central to the radio revolution 0


۩, Thursday, 1 May 2014 17:32 (ten years ago) link

3 or 7 in the running for second place but #1 has to be

8. It made us cook

Without Britpop there would have been no Jamie Oliver: the mop-topped, bish-bash-boshing Naked Chef, riding his scooter and listening to (eek!) Toploader. And without Jamie Oliver, a generation of fellas wouldn’t be dedicated foodies. “Look at this bad boy! Wallop! Pukka!” *"Blood Sausage!" Etc.

christmas candy bar (al leong), Thursday, 1 May 2014 17:34 (ten years ago) link

As good candidates they all are, and as daft as some are, it has to be 9. It made us culturally cleverer.
This was the era of Oasis talking about never having read a book.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ce7t_NyPkmo

۩, Thursday, 1 May 2014 17:41 (ten years ago) link

Michael Hogan

Michael Hogan is a Telegraph writer specialising in TV and radio. He regularly live blogs The Voice, Strictly Come Dancing, The X Factor and The Apprentice.

Little Saint Hugh of Lincoln (nakhchivan), Thursday, 1 May 2014 17:44 (ten years ago) link

Michael Hogan ‏@michaelhogan 39m

More just in: pranny/prannet, fucktrumpet, spunknugget, ninny, muppet, knobjockey, cockwomble, poltroon, corsair #alternativestotheRword

Michael Hogan ‏@michaelhogan 47m

Suggestions so far: numpty, pillock, git wizard, prat, berk, bellend, div, fuckwit, wazzock #alternativestotheRword

Little Saint Hugh of Lincoln (nakhchivan), Thursday, 1 May 2014 17:45 (ten years ago) link

"3. It wasn’t to be sniffed at" for wretched coke-punnery, although lol at this fool thinking that the Doc Marten revival had anything to do with Britpop.

how's life, Thursday, 1 May 2014 17:46 (ten years ago) link

This makes me feel completely fucking stabby.

Most of the time I don't see what you guys are getting outraged about in the whole "bad music journalism" stakes but this really makes me want to kill someone.

Bramble Bluebell (Branwell Bell), Thursday, 1 May 2014 17:56 (ten years ago) link

Britpop was unadulterated waste and still I feel this cunt is doing it down

wins, Thursday, 1 May 2014 18:02 (ten years ago) link

i can't get past 9; the idea that being aware of bowie and the who 'made young men smarter' is just...

(The Other) J.D. (J.D.), Thursday, 1 May 2014 18:04 (ten years ago) link

smart ppl know about stuff so knowing that some stuff exists makes u smart

wins, Thursday, 1 May 2014 18:06 (ten years ago) link

duh

difficult listening hour, Thursday, 1 May 2014 18:07 (ten years ago) link

my favorite phrase here is "poncey bottled beers"

difficult listening hour, Thursday, 1 May 2014 18:07 (ten years ago) link

It's basic science xp

wins, Thursday, 1 May 2014 18:07 (ten years ago) link

Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife!

marcos, Thursday, 1 May 2014 18:13 (ten years ago) link

Coke’s never really fallen out of fashion since!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

marcos, Thursday, 1 May 2014 18:14 (ten years ago) link

“Look at this bad boy! Wallop! Pukka!” *"Blood Sausage!" Etc."J Oliver's severed cock injected with molten soap"

xelab, Thursday, 1 May 2014 18:26 (ten years ago) link

Literally all these thing are terrible except for live music, which I'm pretty sure Nirvana at Reading would have some quibbles about

whatchutola khomeini (Whiney G. Weingarten), Thursday, 1 May 2014 18:28 (ten years ago) link

xp severed manhood & shriveled listicles itt

wins, Thursday, 1 May 2014 18:33 (ten years ago) link

Literally all these thing are terrible except for live music, which I'm pretty sure Nirvana at Reading would have some quibbles about

Many would complain that britpop and its after effects ruined festivals like Glastonbury and it attracted laddish beer monsters to gigs and how it was all better in ye olde days

۩, Thursday, 1 May 2014 19:02 (ten years ago) link

that cokepun doesn't even make any sense. apparently it WAS to be sniffed at.

difficult listening hour, Thursday, 1 May 2014 19:04 (ten years ago) link

Hardest poll ever

paolo, Thursday, 1 May 2014 19:39 (ten years ago) link

Dress-sense one is very wrong. Football terrace fashion had been in full swing for a at least a decade by this point. Whether or not you prefer a pastel-shade Pringle sweater over an "Adidas trackie top", burgundy sta-press over cords or desert boots over patent leather slip-ons with a gilt buckle is pretty much down to individual taste.

everything, Thursday, 1 May 2014 19:46 (ten years ago) link

Voting "it made football cool again" because as a US citizen, I'm not sure football has ever been uncool in the UK.

▴▲ ▴TH3CR()$BY$H()W▴▲ ▴ (Adam Bruneau), Thursday, 1 May 2014 20:06 (ten years ago) link

It actually was "uncool" with the non-working classes for a long time but the new stadiums and big signings due to tv money had a bigger effect. Now its too expensive to go to for most people.

۩, Thursday, 1 May 2014 20:17 (ten years ago) link

10. Easy

Mark G, Thursday, 1 May 2014 20:23 (ten years ago) link

Yes mother, Friday night, it's all gonna kick off

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pajpJKznF9A

out comes stanley, Thursday, 1 May 2014 20:44 (ten years ago) link

This article is just so fucking cunting stupid.

Toni Braxton-Hicks (Turrican), Thursday, 1 May 2014 21:45 (ten years ago) link

As rock’n’roll poet Murray Lachlan Young titled his 1996 poem As rock’n’roll poet Murray Lachlan Young titled his 1996 poem As rock’n’roll poet Murray Lachlan Young titled his 1996 poem As rock’n’roll poet Murray Lachlan Young titled his 1996 poem As rock’n’roll poet Murray Lachlan Young titled his 1996 poem As rock’n’roll poet Murray Lachlan Young titled his 1996 poem As rock’n’roll poet Murray Lachlan Young titled his 1996 poem As rock’n’roll poet Murray Lachlan Young titled his 1996 poem

Prostitute Farm Online (Bananaman Begins), Thursday, 1 May 2014 22:51 (ten years ago) link

Michael Hogan ‏@michaelhogan Apr 30

Long bad Wednesday :( #RIPBobHoskins

Little Saint Hugh of Lincoln (nakhchivan), Thursday, 1 May 2014 23:24 (ten years ago) link

that article has a lot of meme which must be kept alive IMO

dollar rave club (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, 1 May 2014 23:30 (ten years ago) link

“wahey, boobz and bantz!” kind of laddishess.

what is wahey and bantz?

dollar rave club (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, 1 May 2014 23:31 (ten years ago) link

Britpop is often stereotyped as lumpenly thuggish but it made young men smarter too. We were inspired to explore its musical influences: not just the Beatles but The Who, The Kinks, Bowie, The Byrds, The Jam, Sex Pistols and Small Faces.

the 'not just' here is probably the best bit of the whole thing

Little Saint Hugh of Lincoln (nakhchivan), Thursday, 1 May 2014 23:35 (ten years ago) link

LOL yeah digging deep there.

▴▲ ▴TH3CR()$BY$H()W▴▲ ▴ (Adam Bruneau), Thursday, 1 May 2014 23:37 (ten years ago) link

Sex Pistols were a side project of the bass player for Rich Kids iirc

dollar rave club (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, 1 May 2014 23:39 (ten years ago) link

7. It made boys be boys

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ADgCeYJMN4

Frontier Psychiatrist, Friday, 2 May 2014 00:02 (ten years ago) link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukA8ocBJu2M

how's life, Friday, 2 May 2014 00:12 (ten years ago) link

This article was one of the worst I've read. Cant believe someone got paid for writing it.

۩, Friday, 2 May 2014 01:20 (ten years ago) link

And I don't know WHY it even got written. If it had been a lads mag or something I'd understand, but the torygraph?

۩, Friday, 2 May 2014 01:30 (ten years ago) link

I don’t mean that tedious “wahey, boobz and bantz!” kind of laddishess oh wait that's exactly what I mean never mind.

olly, Friday, 2 May 2014 12:26 (ten years ago) link

It's just a bit of bantz.

Mark G, Friday, 2 May 2014 12:30 (ten years ago) link

i'm actually in a state of shock this is so terrible

the same author wrote an execrable "why beards are the new penises" piece in shortlist yesterday. gotta be a contender for worst writer in britain right now

lex pretend, Friday, 2 May 2014 12:32 (ten years ago) link

really, what is "wahey"?

how's life, Friday, 2 May 2014 12:34 (ten years ago) link

It's a kind of all-purpose rousing cheer, roughly equivalent to "Here we go!"

goth colouring book (anagram), Friday, 2 May 2014 12:37 (ten years ago) link

It's a Chris Evans thing, I think.

Mark G, Friday, 2 May 2014 12:44 (ten years ago) link

"Wahey" is way, way older than Chris Evans. We were reading it in the Beano back in the 70s.

Bramble Bluebell (Branwell Bell), Friday, 2 May 2014 12:46 (ten years ago) link

the same author wrote an execrable "why beards are the new penises" piece in shortlist yesterday. gotta be a contender for worst writer in britain right now

― lex pretend,

wait a min, what??? Link please?

۩, Friday, 2 May 2014 12:57 (ten years ago) link

same guy wrote this: http://www.shortlist.com/grooming/why-beards-are-the-new-penises

:(((((((

xp

lex pretend, Friday, 2 May 2014 12:58 (ten years ago) link

It's a kind of all-purpose rousing cheer, roughly equivalent to "Here we go!"

it has overtones of leering crepeyness in an on the buses way too though

john wahey (NickB), Friday, 2 May 2014 12:58 (ten years ago) link

really, what is "wahey"?

Man flashes Queen, shouts "wahey!"

Diddley Hollyberry (Phil D.), Friday, 2 May 2014 12:59 (ten years ago) link

Facial foliage isn’t the sole preserve of hipsters any more. The beard revival might have started in Brooklyn and east London – where social-media strategists, web designers, barmen and baristas like to pretend they’re alt-folk musicians or artisan lumberjacks, teaming a well-groomed beard with tweed, tattoos and a fixie – but now beards are mainstream. Beards have gone commercial. They’re playing arenas and doing dodgy ads.

Everyone’s got one. Even some of the women.

۩, Friday, 2 May 2014 13:03 (ten years ago) link

Christ this is one of the most inane things I've ever read.

Matt DC, Friday, 2 May 2014 13:07 (ten years ago) link

Voting #10. I know I never went down the pub pre-Britpop.

Matt DC, Friday, 2 May 2014 13:08 (ten years ago) link

I'm really, really glad that I didn't click on that link now.

Bramble Bluebell (Branwell Bell), Friday, 2 May 2014 13:09 (ten years ago) link

I'll never hear the phrase "wahey!" without cracking up laughing again.

― Trayce (trayce), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 06:49 (10 years ago) Permalink

Mark G, Friday, 2 May 2014 13:11 (ten years ago) link

The trickle-down is still being felt on Radios 1 and 2, 6Music, Absolute and Xfm today.

never really thought of trickle-down as an incontinence metaphor before, but there you go

john wahey (NickB), Friday, 2 May 2014 13:18 (ten years ago) link

I know; this is clickbait. Nothing but clickbait because in 2014 if it’s not clickbait nobody is interested. Everything black or white, nothing in between, because that’s not a G**d St*ry. I know that these things are also supposed to wind up people like me.

But this guy has a career. This guy gets paid. This guy has the vote. This guy is allowed to help bring children into the world.

And you know what it’s like for people like me to look at this? It’s nothing to do with envy or “I should have trained as a journalist in 1980 when I was given the chance.” It’s to do with sitting in class, doing my best to pay attention and to learn and interpret what I’m being taught. Sitting up the front of the class and there are these jerks at the back who just smirk and laugh and sniff their armpits and throw paper darts and don’t give a shit about learning or what’s being taught.

And then you wake up thirty years later and somehow these people at the back have all got ahead of you and now control everything. To hell with basic spelling, grammar, syntax and argumentative logic. And the worst thing about it is that maybe it’s not even these people – it’s people who have been expensively and privately educated, who went to the right college and made the right friends, making sure that people like me will never catch up, will continue knocking themselves out trying to write something different that gets read by a couple of hundred people at best, because they know that all people want now is lists, and received opinions that confirm what they already think, and online they mainly want to gawp at shit that looks like Hitler.

It’s like the metaphorical boot of the school bully stamping on one’s face again while he sneers: “You are INFERIOR. Bend your head.” All my fucking life.

i suppose at this stage it will shock no one to learn that this guy also enjoys making racist jokes about ~ethnic names

https://twitter.com/michaelhogan/status/462148077508644864

lex pretend, Friday, 2 May 2014 13:25 (ten years ago) link

Thanks, Lex. That's him blocked.

why the fuck he and i have FIFTY-FIVE mutual followers i have no fucking idea

lex pretend, Friday, 2 May 2014 13:29 (ten years ago) link

yeah i am surprised by how many of my followers follow him. That is a really fucking depressing article. And pure modern hack prose.

woof, Friday, 2 May 2014 13:33 (ten years ago) link

Gender fascist, racist... can we go for the full hat trick? I'm in a bad mood but this guy is repulsive.

OH WAIT BUT IT'S ALL BANTZ, AMIRITE?

Bramble Bluebell (Branwell Bell), Friday, 2 May 2014 13:33 (ten years ago) link

terrible article... i mean the reasons are bad enough, the premise is terrible in itself, but the writing is just bad, tossed off rubbish and offensive with it too.

1 pONO 3v3Ry+h1n G!!!1 (dog latin), Friday, 2 May 2014 13:35 (ten years ago) link

I'm generally fine with clickbait listicles as long as they're interesting and informative but Marcello is absolutely right about the implicit flippant smirk being completely intolerable. That tone of 'none of us really care about this, so let's just throw some lazy joeks together' is completely infuriating.

Yuri Bashment (ShariVari), Friday, 2 May 2014 13:35 (ten years ago) link

implicit flippant smirk being completely intolerable. That tone of 'none of us really care about this, so let's just throw some lazy joeks together' is completely infuriating.

Sounds like ILM

۩, Friday, 2 May 2014 13:36 (ten years ago) link

I should just stop reading hack prose like Hogan's. On a medical level, it’s not good for my blood pressure and I’m under doctor’s orders to eliminate or minimise all stress factors in my life (easier said than done, but you do what you can). All stuff like this does is annoy me and makes me go AARGH and the worst thing is that it’s kind of the point to annoy people like me. Not only is the piece deliberately stupid, but its stupidity is ladled on with relish, and that’s what really stinks about it. But yes, I just need to learn to ignore/disregard this stuff and, if I can’t, stop getting so annoyed about it.

xp fair point, should probably hand back all my paychecks I got for posting here

From Tha Crouuuch To Da Palacios (DJ Mencap), Friday, 2 May 2014 13:52 (ten years ago) link

The ubiquitous, artfully distressed gastropubs of today owe a debt to “The Mixer”.

keep coming back to read this because it's probably the most innocuous statement in the whole thing, yet also the most astonishingly hit-the-corner-flag inaccurate

From Tha Crouuuch To Da Palacios (DJ Mencap), Friday, 2 May 2014 13:55 (ten years ago) link

Yeah, it was always "a pub", wasn't it?

The way to spot a 'fake-punter' was if they 'complained' that they were doing "souvenir t-shirts" over the counter there (apparently, they always did).

(Never went there, although I used to go to Camden a lot)

Mark G, Friday, 2 May 2014 14:00 (ten years ago) link

to briefly lower discussion to his kind of level...

Apparently mine was “a proper big old man’s one”, whereas his was “patchy ginger bumfluff”. I pooh-poohed this, obviously – I’m not a complete monster – but was secretly delighted. We even exchanged tweets the following morning, comparing hangovers, and he again mentioned his “serious beard envy”.

https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/3073159154/8fd3aa9e63f0f97538398c425ce93392.jpeg

nah.

Merdeyeux, Friday, 2 May 2014 14:09 (ten years ago) link

This guy had me at "cool, exciting new stuff...Friends"

goth colouring book (anagram), Friday, 2 May 2014 14:10 (ten years ago) link

i can't stop laughing at number 8. the notion that britpop and foodie culture are somehow connected through that well-known britpop pinup, jamie oliver, is one of the craziest things i've read in ages

ginuwine's cousin (monotony), Friday, 2 May 2014 14:14 (ten years ago) link

TBF Jamie Oliver was the Britpop chef.

1 pONO 3v3Ry+h1n G!!!1 (dog latin), Friday, 2 May 2014 14:16 (ten years ago) link

seeing his wretched little pubic trimmings stuck to his giant shiny penis head like that makes me think he had a point with the beard/penis comparison, even if it only applied to him.

gyac, Friday, 2 May 2014 14:19 (ten years ago) link

"Why black-frame glasses are the new Porsche"

Mark G, Friday, 2 May 2014 14:20 (ten years ago) link

I used to go to Camden a lot

This is where I get all misty-eyed and rhapsodise about the Good Old Days of Rhythm Records, Compendium Books, Rock On and MVE. And Marine Ices before it was sold and lost every single factor that made me want to go and eat there. Even that Goth place near the Lock that sold CDs in the basement. Love’s Secret Domain by Coil for a fiver? That’s where you went.

Now I can’t think of a single reason to go there. Out On The Floor? Not what it was. Charity shops? More hit and miss than they used to be.

The reasons I go there is that the kids love it there. And, yeah, it's nice etc..

(And I do remember all the things you mention there, apart from Marine ices, guess I missed out there)

Mark G, Friday, 2 May 2014 14:25 (ten years ago) link

there there there etc.

Mark G, Friday, 2 May 2014 14:26 (ten years ago) link

let's have it! mad fer it! parklife!! etc.

marcos, Friday, 2 May 2014 14:32 (ten years ago) link

look at this badboy! wallop!! pukka! etc/

marcos, Friday, 2 May 2014 14:33 (ten years ago) link

From Three Lions to the Gallaghers' Man City shirts, the beautiful game became linked with the music scene for the first time since George Best.

This is complete bollocks isn't it? Chas'n'Dave & Spurs, Rod Stewart & Celtic, Elton John & Watford etc

john wahey (NickB), Friday, 2 May 2014 14:52 (ten years ago) link

Mark E Smith is a big football fan too right?

dollar rave club (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Friday, 2 May 2014 15:05 (ten years ago) link

he's mad fer it! parklife! etc.

marcos, Friday, 2 May 2014 15:05 (ten years ago) link

maybe he just meant 'since George Best by the Wedding Present'

john wahey (NickB), Friday, 2 May 2014 15:06 (ten years ago) link

even then, 'World In Motion' was from 1990 right?

john wahey (NickB), Friday, 2 May 2014 15:11 (ten years ago) link

Remember 'Luv'd Up' being a phrase.

1 pONO 3v3Ry+h1n G!!!1 (dog latin), Friday, 2 May 2014 15:23 (ten years ago) link

the thing i love is that the whole article's point is basically "Britpop made it okay for young white men to act like drunk assholes and like sports!"

like wooow yeah that's so novel

dollar rave club (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Friday, 2 May 2014 15:38 (ten years ago) link

Are there any complete sentences that actually are true?

Mark G, Friday, 2 May 2014 15:39 (ten years ago) link

pukka!

marcos, Friday, 2 May 2014 15:40 (ten years ago) link

wallop!

marcos, Friday, 2 May 2014 15:40 (ten years ago) link

etc.

marcos, Friday, 2 May 2014 15:40 (ten years ago) link

There wasn’t just a Britpop band called Menswe@r (doesn’t that “@“ date them?):

It was short for Menswe@britpop.com

Mark G, Friday, 2 May 2014 15:42 (ten years ago) link

All of you mithering about a transparently and incontrovertibly moronic listicle aren't contributing constructively to any discourse, merely indulging in ILX's favourite sport

Actions, not words. Egg Hogan's house. Protest outside The Telegraph's offices. Publicly burn copies of Parklife. Of course, none of this shall be done, so it is as though we are yelling into a preposterous void through which Hogan's paycheck flutters unconcernedly

The other option would be to mercilessly spam his Twitter feed. You all seem to have the time. To it, soldiers.

imago, Friday, 2 May 2014 15:57 (ten years ago) link

smh i BEEN yelling at him and his racist mate john niven on twitter already

lex pretend, Friday, 2 May 2014 16:09 (ten years ago) link

you are an honourable exception :D

imago, Friday, 2 May 2014 16:17 (ten years ago) link

none of this shall be done, so it is as though we are yelling into a preposterous void through which Hogan's paycheck flutters unconcernedly

― imago, Friday, 2 May 2014 16:57 (20 minutes ago)

this is as it should be

its a cold world out there and people do worse things than michael hogan in order to feed their children in n16

though gotta say im intrigued about whether he /does/ get paid

he liveblogs about the most worthless of tv shit in the telegraph, he writes the odd article for its website (this got 7 comments last time i checked), his twitter and cursorily checked internet presence don't suggest he does a whole lot

is this a viable program for a sustained existence? idk, maybe the barclay brothers routintely write blank cheques to anyone who can come up with shit like

Michael Hogan @michaelhogan

Weirdly, Tamiflu Stockpile is my porn name

sixteen retweets.....this along with his lavatorial sensibility and paeans to the merits of class a drugs don't even suggest he is a neat fit for telegraph media group

what is he even doing?

Little Saint Hugh of Lincoln (nakhchivan), Friday, 2 May 2014 16:29 (ten years ago) link

Torygraph: what are the main avatars of britpop according to an expert on shit reality tv
Hogan: nose, Best

wins, Friday, 2 May 2014 16:41 (ten years ago) link

(ilxor: nooooo, &c)

wins, Friday, 2 May 2014 16:42 (ten years ago) link

Telegraph Media Group editor in chief Jason Seiken has outlined his vision for creating a "digitally native" news organisation which can thrive in a new "golden age" for journalism.

Speaking at the Newsworks conference in London (read full address here) he said: "The pessimists say we are living in desperate times...We are actually living in a golden age of journalism".

He said that historically "disrupting technology" has led to "better choices for consumers and better economics for producers".

and representatives of the scott trust have also contracted with him to haemorrhage content 114 times in the last couple of years, cf

A recent spoof news story claimed that Oasis will stage a comeback later this year under the new name of Noelgallagher: "Sources close to the Manchester band said the music will sound the same in every conceivable way but with a slightly deeper and less annoying voice." Elsewhere on satirical site The Daily Mash, God responds angrily to Noel's claims that he is an Oasis fan. "I'd never actually heard of them until yesterday," says the bearded deity. "Having had a quick listen, I'd say it's a load of derivative, sub-Beatles tosh fronted by divs. I'm more into harp music."

This summer's a biggie for Brand Britain. Not only does Queen Gawdblessherbeth II celebrate 60 years of waving, but there's some sporty thing called, like, the Olympics? To capitalise, the combined UK tourist boards are launching a £5m campaign called "Make it a GREAT 2012". The shouty caps are theirs. It's the written-down version of a Brit raising his voice to make Johnny Foreigner understand he wants A PROPER CUP OF TEA.

Talking of tea, the ad opens with Stephen Fry sipping some. What could be more British than Twitter's top walking thesaurus wielding a cup and saucer like a tweedy Lady Gaga?

Little Saint Hugh of Lincoln (nakhchivan), Friday, 2 May 2014 16:46 (ten years ago) link

mad fer it!

dollar rave club (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Friday, 2 May 2014 18:49 (ten years ago) link

wallop!

marcos, Friday, 2 May 2014 18:50 (ten years ago) link

etc

marcos, Friday, 2 May 2014 18:51 (ten years ago) link

I never met anyone that said mad fer it. Not once.

۩, Friday, 2 May 2014 18:56 (ten years ago) link

Nice having some bantz w you marcos :)

dollar rave club (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Friday, 2 May 2014 18:56 (ten years ago) link

wahey! etc.

marcos, Friday, 2 May 2014 18:59 (ten years ago) link

'fucking' written phonetically as 'fookin' something that predates britpop?

voted for #8 cuz i can't think of any cuisine less appetizing than that made by a britpop stan

le goon (J0rdan S.), Friday, 2 May 2014 19:04 (ten years ago) link

He is worse than just a harmless britpop stan, behind the fake perky everybloke front he is quite a bigoted prick.

under the cobblestones, le dogshit (xelab), Friday, 2 May 2014 19:14 (ten years ago) link

let's have it!

marcos, Friday, 2 May 2014 19:16 (ten years ago) link

'fucking' written phonetically as 'fookin' something that predates britpop?

― the final toasting before making a dash for the frigid regions upstairs (soref), Friday, 2 May 2014 20:04 (26 minutes ago)

theres a thinkpiece somewhere abt this saying it infantilizes the north to print that but not 'fuck'

Little Saint Hugh of Lincoln (nakhchivan), Friday, 2 May 2014 19:32 (ten years ago) link

the fookin thing was around when I first read the music press. Thought it was stupid then too

۩, Friday, 2 May 2014 19:46 (ten years ago) link

I remember when the NME started to write the word fuck uncensored. a momentous day. suddenly it felt like we could do anything

From Tha Crouuuch To Da Palacios (DJ Mencap), Friday, 2 May 2014 21:09 (ten years ago) link

were you mad fer it?!?!

marcos, Friday, 2 May 2014 21:10 (ten years ago) link

Yeah, the fookin thing was always around - as well as other ways of transcribing accent phonetically - especially during Madchester. It did always come across as awfully patronising.

I was a weird teenager who assumed I was on the verge of being interviewed extensively by the NME and Melody Maker, and I was very paranoid about this. I remember taking elocution lessons specifically to ensure I couldn't be done over in this way. The first proper gig I went to was the Manic Street Preachers in Edinburgh in early 1992. Afterwards, me and my friend ended up in their dressing room. No one else: just me, him and the Manics. Dismal times for the Manics no doubt. I had the ear of Richey Manic and all I really talked to him about was whether he felt he had to make a special effort to talk proper to the music press. He didn't.

Eyeball Kicks, Friday, 2 May 2014 21:17 (ten years ago) link

Is this real?

I genuinely can't tell what is satire in this article and what is for real. I never get most British comedy or puns....minus Fawlty Towers.

Dreamland, Friday, 2 May 2014 21:17 (ten years ago) link

I only ever read the NME between '89 and '91 and can't even remember their swearing policy, am sure Swells used to swear a lot, bless his soul.

under the cobblestones, le dogshit (xelab), Friday, 2 May 2014 21:32 (ten years ago) link

I never met anyone that said mad fer it. Not once.

― ۩, Friday, May 2, 2014 6:56 PM (3 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Likewise.

Toni Braxton-Hicks (Turrican), Friday, 2 May 2014 22:11 (ten years ago) link

Well yeah, imagine saying that. You can't. QED.

wins, Friday, 2 May 2014 22:17 (ten years ago) link

^am given to understand they changed the name to the far more dignified 'The Ferret'

From Tha Crouuuch To Da Palacios (DJ Mencap), Friday, 2 May 2014 22:48 (ten years ago) link

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

System, Wednesday, 14 May 2014 00:01 (ten years ago) link

I forgot about this poll

۩, Wednesday, 14 May 2014 10:06 (ten years ago) link

I don’t mean that tedious “wahey, boobz and bantz!” kind of laddishess.

I mean an old-fashioned, faintly roguish joy in just being a cheeky tearaway who likes football, beer, rock music and male bonding. Let’s have it! Mad fer it! Parklife! Etc.

You couldn't get a fucking fag paper between these stereotypes. Does Liam Gallagher stopping a huge gig and refusing to play until he sees a "bird with her tits out" on the big screen count as "wahey, boobs and bantz" or "roguish mad fer it cheeky tearaway"?

I voted for blood sausage in accordance with my duty as a British ilxor.

pick it up for ripple laser (onimo), Wednesday, 14 May 2014 12:12 (ten years ago) link

If that was the Oasis gig I went to (Wembley, the one on the Video), she had already. Liam asking for something that was already there...

Mark G, Wednesday, 14 May 2014 12:20 (ten years ago) link

I was going to vote for food, it's always a good idea to have some.

Then I read the 'entry' um....

Mark G, Wednesday, 14 May 2014 12:21 (ten years ago) link

Great article

james lipton and his francs (darraghmac), Wednesday, 14 May 2014 21:06 (ten years ago) link

mad fer it!

marcos, Wednesday, 14 May 2014 21:09 (ten years ago) link

etc

marcos, Wednesday, 14 May 2014 21:10 (ten years ago) link

wallop! etc

marcos, Wednesday, 14 May 2014 21:11 (ten years ago) link

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marcos, Wednesday, 14 May 2014 21:11 (ten years ago) link

pukka!

marcos, Wednesday, 14 May 2014 21:12 (ten years ago) link

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

System, Thursday, 15 May 2014 00:01 (ten years ago) link

this wastemans twitter feed is the most abject shit imaginable, nexus of aging landfill media cunts retweeting each others tryhand bantz about the worthless british culture of their youth, every single one of them is human faeces

Little Saint Hugh of Lincoln (nakhchivan), Thursday, 15 May 2014 00:26 (ten years ago) link

^^^^^^

nothing but contempt and immense disapproval of everyone i know who tacitly approves of that shit

lex pretend, Thursday, 15 May 2014 06:40 (ten years ago) link

On the 'ead!

now I'm the grandfather (dog latin), Thursday, 15 May 2014 09:16 (ten years ago) link

Fancy a ruby? Man on!

now I'm the grandfather (dog latin), Thursday, 15 May 2014 09:17 (ten years ago) link

Are we gannin down the pub or wot?

Mark G, Thursday, 15 May 2014 10:15 (ten years ago) link

jfc stfu with this

lex pretend, Thursday, 15 May 2014 10:16 (ten years ago) link

kmt

james lipton and his francs (darraghmac), Thursday, 15 May 2014 10:18 (ten years ago) link

Hang on, I've only just realised this is a Daily Telegraph article which tacitly endorses cocaine.

the joke should be over once the kid is eaten. (chap), Thursday, 15 May 2014 12:33 (ten years ago) link

John Niven is the worst of these cocks, there's this poisonous mix of casual racism and sub-Frankie Boyle shit whenever he's called out on it.

Matt DC, Thursday, 15 May 2014 13:07 (ten years ago) link

wallop! etc.

marcos, Thursday, 15 May 2014 13:12 (ten years ago) link

ReferEEE!

now I'm the grandfather (dog latin), Thursday, 15 May 2014 13:23 (ten years ago) link

'Avin it LARRRGE

now I'm the grandfather (dog latin), Thursday, 15 May 2014 13:25 (ten years ago) link

SHUT THE FUCK UP EVERYONE

lex pretend, Thursday, 15 May 2014 13:36 (ten years ago) link

fuckinell you're literally as bad as the cunt who wrote this

lex pretend, Thursday, 15 May 2014 13:37 (ten years ago) link

Yeah, shut up with the top bantz everyone.

now I'm the grandfather (dog latin), Thursday, 15 May 2014 13:43 (ten years ago) link

lol lex if you don't want to deal with people having some fun ripping on this loser why the FUCK did you click on this thread?

marcos, Thursday, 15 May 2014 13:56 (ten years ago) link

lex's intriguing ILX style strikes again

online hardman, Thursday, 15 May 2014 13:58 (ten years ago) link

i'm all for seeing everyone rip on him but this isn't that

lex pretend, Thursday, 15 May 2014 13:58 (ten years ago) link

IMITATION IS NOT SATIRE

lex pretend, Thursday, 15 May 2014 13:58 (ten years ago) link

He Wants to "deal with" etc.

Mark G, Thursday, 15 May 2014 13:59 (ten years ago) link

xpost in some cases it is.

now I'm the grandfather (dog latin), Thursday, 15 May 2014 14:07 (ten years ago) link

actually in quite a few cases, it is.

now I'm the grandfather (dog latin), Thursday, 15 May 2014 14:07 (ten years ago) link

in fact i'd like to see an example of satire which has no grounding in imitation what so ever.

now I'm the grandfather (dog latin), Thursday, 15 May 2014 14:08 (ten years ago) link

double bubble!

Prostitute Farm Online (Bananaman Begins), Thursday, 15 May 2014 14:11 (ten years ago) link

lex in terms of people sarcastically talking like this guy ITT thread would it be fair you say that you are NOT, in fact, mad fer it, parklife etc?

dollar rave club (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, 15 May 2014 14:14 (ten years ago) link

I'm gonna whack my ol' man right up 'is alley. Oi oi!

now I'm the grandfather (dog latin), Thursday, 15 May 2014 14:22 (ten years ago) link

pretending to hate the bants = classic m8

Prostitute Farm Online (Bananaman Begins), Thursday, 15 May 2014 14:27 (ten years ago) link

Gertcha!

Prostitute Farm Online (Bananaman Begins), Thursday, 15 May 2014 14:28 (ten years ago) link

Fackin love Chas n Dave, fackin legends

Prostitute Farm Online (Bananaman Begins), Thursday, 15 May 2014 14:28 (ten years ago) link

i literally have no idea what the fuck you ppl are talking about

and

i'm mad fer it tbh

dollar rave club (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, 15 May 2014 14:55 (ten years ago) link

i'm listening to sleaford mods now and i love it but i understand less than 50 percent of what this tosser is on about

dollar rave club (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, 15 May 2014 14:56 (ten years ago) link

Cool it mat, we're only havin a laugh mate. It's just a laugh mate.

now I'm the grandfather (dog latin), Thursday, 15 May 2014 15:10 (ten years ago) link

Sleaford Mods are kind of the antithesis of this crap.

Matt DC, Thursday, 15 May 2014 15:34 (ten years ago) link

yes

now I'm the grandfather (dog latin), Thursday, 15 May 2014 15:37 (ten years ago) link

Earl Brutus, the ghosts at the Britpop feast

Angkor Waht (Neil S), Thursday, 15 May 2014 15:51 (ten years ago) link

Sleaford Mods are kind of the antithesis of this crap.

― Matt DC, Thursday, May 15, 2014 10:34 AM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

oh i know! they rule!

just they drop a lot of references and slang i don't know.

dollar rave club (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, 15 May 2014 18:29 (ten years ago) link

is not understanding references and slang such a big deal for you? when i hear US slang in rap songs i get over it or perhaps learn something, rather than going OH LOL AMERICANS ARE SO WACKY AND WEIRD

lex pretend, Thursday, 15 May 2014 23:07 (ten years ago) link

no. it's not actually, lex, and i resent your use of "LOL" and all caps.

dollar rave club (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, 15 May 2014 23:32 (ten years ago) link

I don't understand most lyrics tbf

now I'm the grandfather (dog latin), Friday, 16 May 2014 00:48 (nine years ago) link

fair dinkum

dollar rave club (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Friday, 16 May 2014 01:20 (nine years ago) link

American tech, Italian food, and Scandi design

Could be anyone in the world yes?

calstars, Friday, 16 May 2014 01:31 (nine years ago) link

dog latin appears to be auditioning for Republica on this thread

۩, Friday, 16 May 2014 23:27 (nine years ago) link

he seems to be ready to go!

Toni Braxton-Hicks (Turrican), Friday, 16 May 2014 23:38 (nine years ago) link

two years pass...

Michael Hogan ‏@michaelhogan 39m

More just in: pranny/prannet, fucktrumpet, spunknugget, ninny, muppet, knobjockey, cockwomble, poltroon, corsair #alternativestotheRword

Michael Hogan ‏@michaelhogan 47m

Suggestions so far: numpty, pillock, git wizard, prat, berk, bellend, div, fuckwit, wazzock #alternativestotheRword

― Little Saint Hugh of Lincoln (nakhchivan), Thursday, May 1, 2014 6:45 PM (2 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

oh, amazonaws (wins), Saturday, 25 June 2016 09:14 (seven years ago) link

trump is such a twatting prannet!

oh, amazonaws (wins), Saturday, 25 June 2016 09:15 (seven years ago) link

two months pass...

Michael Hogan ‏@michaelhogan 2h2 hours ago

Bought my usual Geordie comedy monthly but it's full of rent boys, coke and poppers. Turns out I picked up Vaz Comic by mistake

soref, Saturday, 10 September 2016 16:11 (seven years ago) link

more like Shitpop

you can't drowned a duck (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 10 September 2016 16:28 (seven years ago) link

\o/

mark s, Saturday, 10 September 2016 16:31 (seven years ago) link


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