important baseball tweets

https://i.imgur.com/r23p8Dl.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/jELury3.jpg

@BarryBonds
How about that @AROD go-ahead grand slam last night? #Clutch

hahaha

https://twitter.com/billshaikin/status/641481111156035584

so chill

@MarcCarig
Juan Uribe just offered me a wad of chew soaked in Kahlua and honey. I tell Juan Uribe I'm working. Juan Uribe yells "JUST A LITTLE BIT!!!"

@Marlins
A note: @MarlinsPark concession stands are all out of Pepsi Perfect. All other Pepsi products are available. Apologies for the inconvenience

Make alternate plans.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CQ5Z7jBUcAAxrbM.png

https://twitter.com/CMBaseball41/status/662729655208685572

http://i.imgur.com/2RotSIZ.png

http://i.imgur.com/O9dkQBR.png

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CZRwVa3WcAE80kj.jpg

https://twitter.com/JohnnyCueto/status/690300168730742788

that's cueto hoss you got there

https://twitter.com/hunterpence/status/689525463773937664

#ad

https://twitter.com/AlexPavlovic/status/698580094843883520

@pedromoura
Dave Roberts and White Sox manager Robin Ventura took a picture together at Cactus League media day. “Black man and Robin,” Roberts said.

https://twitter.com/pabloozuna38/status/705057945890004992

https://twitter.com/TonyLaRussa/status/712716335780728832

http://i.imgur.com/RKe7IDn.png

that is brilliant.

http://i.imgur.com/XGT4zlB.png

dan haren @ithrow88
@JArrieta34 saw you gave up a run, hang in there. Thinking of you.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BE_2mY4Q6jg

#PuigNotScared

@LennyDykstra
Oh so this is Twitter? I can say whatever the fuck I want right?

right on time

lmk when he tweets himself out of the '86 Mets reunion on the 28th

http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/baseball/mets/lenny-dykstra-live-tweeting-national-spelling-bee-article-1.2650815

@JoseCanseco
Make no mistake Brexit will crater the UK into recession and the pound will do a 25% faceplant. Capital will flee like its pants are on fire

obv an Economist reader

http://i.imgur.com/JsojfGq.png

https://twitter.com/keithlaw/status/776895750810767360

@darrenrovell
Andrew Miller says he hasn't washed his jock strap since his last bad outing on Sept. 7. That's 18 appearances and 51 days (H/T @BenReiter)

In unrelated news, Upper Deck is coming out with a limited edition Smell-o-vision series of cards featuring game used baseball equipment! Can't wait to check that out

I know two of the people featured in here: http://mashable.com/2016/10/28/mike-napoli-pooping-game-3

Sad that A's deleted their tweets as I fully support all the SmashMouth bashing.

http://www.espn.com/mlb/story/_/page/QTP_161029SmashMouth/twitter-feud-oakland-athletics-smash-mouth-ensues-following-coco-crisp-world-series-hit

https://twitter.com/Noahsyndergaard/status/797100165110730752

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Czp-lzYUQAIuB_5.jpg
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Czp-lzYUQAAsgJF.jpg
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Czp-lzaUcAAbIQE.jpg

this is an apostrophe

Motivational speaker and author Aubrey Huff took to Twitter.

@aubrey_huff
I mean seriously what the hell is going on? If you have time 2 march, protest and riot. Maybe it's time for something called a job!

@jeffcdwyer
You swung a stick at a ball for a living. Fuck off.

‏

@aubrey_huff
@jeffcdwyer yeah not a lot of boys grow up wanting to do that! I'm such a looser for accomplishing that.

https://mobile.twitter.com/hayesdavenport/status/825913321668870144

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C4UDZl7WcAAPY7b.jpg:small

https://twitter.com/Smatz88/status/834175589695229953

https://twitter.com/Chron_MattYoung/status/834827079560601600

Gary you push through kids to get autographs for a living. I truly don't care my signature won't pay for your PornHub subscription anymore https://t.co/XOiWVyWFzQ

— Micah Johnson (@Micah_Johnson3) May 3, 2017

FENWAY IS CLOSING??? https://t.co/HikPSSYyDb

— DVS (@DVSblast) May 3, 2017

Happy "Loving" day pic.twitter.com/vgwPm0aipi

— Dexter Fowler (@DexterFowler) June 12, 2017

A 15-inch mound in a ballpark lit by 60-watt bulbs. Dodger Stadium in the '60s produced less offense than an Osmond Christmas Special. https://t.co/cMucrArcGV

— Joe Sheehan (@joe_sheehan) July 10, 2017

You, a nerd: why do you like baseball it's boring
Me, wise: cock like a ball bat pic.twitter.com/YsMAOMtCTH

— ak? they gay (@alyssakeiko) August 15, 2017

So Arpaio is free....among people he illegally attempted to detain. America's Toughest Sheriff? We're about to find out. Good luck, Joe.

— Michael Young (@MikeyY626) August 26, 2017

You sound like my agent trying to get me a job after my 2013 season with the Nationals https://t.co/15QaLwk1RI

— dan haren (@ithrow88) August 29, 2017

(his 2013 wasn't awful actually)

welp

http://deadspin.com/willson-contreras-slides-into-mia-khalifas-dms-refuses-1800663882

4.2 bsr @fangraphs so you should 🤐 https://t.co/56MKFvbgoE

— Tommy Pham (@TphamLV) August 13, 2017

These are two interesting tweets: pic.twitter.com/v5KiOEXyY3

— Marc Carig (@MarcCarig) September 19, 2017

hmmm

Folks, I did the math.

Assuming this is his last start, Trevor Williams must allow 3 ER over 5.2 IP in a ND to finish 6-9 with a 4.20 ERA. pic.twitter.com/zifRBMeRn6

— Connor Newcomb (@ConnorNewcomb_) September 26, 2017

Folks, it gets better.

If Homer Bailey goes 6 IP, allows 4 ER and gets the win tomorrow, he finishes 6-9 with a 6.90 ERA and 69 ER allowed. pic.twitter.com/TsTA7BbtC3

— Connor Newcomb (@ConnorNewcomb_) September 26, 2017

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┻┳| •.•) This is a bad idea.
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— Mariners (@Mariners) September 27, 2017

For some reason, C.J. Wilson’s car dealership paid to advertise on the big screen between innings at this meaningless Angels-White Sox game.

— Pedro Moura (@pedromoura) September 29, 2017

He has a Mazda dealership in Chicago. When I was with the Cubs he let me borrow a cherry red Mazda SUV. Zoom zoom

— dan haren (@ithrow88) September 29, 2017

✔

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DLYOZviXkAAd4g3.jpg:small

@Dodgers tell @BMcCarthy32 he’s in. He tells them paint in office sucks. Then says thanks, likes a Flake tweet, chooses arbitrary snack.

— Michael Young (@MikeyY626) October 24, 2017

How do you believe humans arrived on this planet?

— AUBREY HUFF (@aubrey_huff) November 14, 2017

Will be at ur show in Jan. I’m sure you’ll make a stop at @Onnit Let’s train and get weird @joerogan

— Jake Arrieta (@JArrieta34) November 17, 2017

Hi Robert - Yes. Die Hard is a Christmas movie. #BooneAMA https://t.co/et6ukeBK6C

— New York Yankees (@Yankees) December 6, 2017

🏹🏹🏹 pic.twitter.com/9c2nw5hRiw

— Minnesota Twins (@Twins) December 15, 2017

https://deadspin.com/there-is-now-an-app-for-triple-crown-ratio-lines-on-bad-1821792463

time to take a big sip of coffee and check out MLB all-star Sammy Sosa’s engagement photos pic.twitter.com/qfRHNOTFWk

— KT NELSON (@KrangTNelson) February 11, 2018

yikes

walking up Broadway in NYC, i am always startled to see on the sidewalk plaques that they had a parade for Sosa there.

Clayton Kershaw, on if he’s gotten over the World Series: “I don’t really take something and move on. I just kind of absorb it.”

Is that healthy?

“I’m not sure. I’ll let you know, if I explode at some point.”

— Andy McCullough (@McCulloughTimes) February 13, 2018

I pitched a few seasons completely out of the stretch actually, just not by choice https://t.co/13bDxVOzsF

— dan haren (@ithrow88) February 21, 2018

Dan Haren's like a modern day Bob Uecker, hope he sticks around

Pedro Moura looks exactly like I expected him to look

Been sitting on this... Exit velo and launch angle and it’s correlation to % chance of becoming a homer. 2014 vs. 2017 pic.twitter.com/UrfVVFVuJB

— Justin Verlander (@JustinVerlander) March 2, 2018

We..worked on this story for a year...and...he just...he tweeted it outhttps://t.co/E4prSi2A4F

— Ben Lindbergh (@BenLindbergh) March 2, 2018

lol

(this is re: juiced balls i take it?)

well, in the absence of other explanations for increased HR likelihood

U know what’s really unexpectedly cool about playing right field? I get to be eye level with the fans sitting on my side. Had some fun roasting a guy yesterday lol

— Dexter Fowler (@DexterFowler) March 15, 2018

Pay your debts https://t.co/jOxGJscA3O

— Noah Syndergaard (@Noahsyndergaard) March 29, 2018

I hear from some of you tweetsters that my Seinfeld episode was on tonight on Pix. That means I’ll get a nice little check. Enough to pay for dinner tomorrow with the boys in DC. GN

— keith Hernandez (@kher8286) April 4, 2018

Ozzie Guillen In A Venezuelan Telenovela pic.twitter.com/xpk2sUbiIA

— Gustavo Vega (@iamvega1982) May 2, 2018

https://i.imgur.com/n5zZ055.png

zach cozart seems really fun

Zack Cozart on the #Rays starting Romo on back-to-back days: “It was weird...it’s bad for baseball, in my opinion...It’s spring training. That’s the best way to explain it.” #Angels

— Fabian Ardaya (@FabianArdaya) May 20, 2018

v. v. good for baseball, of course

Dear couple that clearly broke up while standing near our bullpen in the 5th inning today,

Lovely entertainment for a few minutes, but we hope you’re ok. Feel free to come back tomorrow and discuss with us. We can provide the third party point of view!

Love,

The Jays bullpen!

— John Axford (@JohnAxford) May 26, 2018

THIS WEBSITE IS FREE @keithlaw pic.twitter.com/DghkOQtQR9

— MillennialFalcon (@zak_vargas) May 25, 2018

pic.twitter.com/B3p5aEHSlb

— Danny Duffy (@duffkc41) June 1, 2018

PJ Conlon after being reacquired by the Mets in less than a week

pic.twitter.com/NS2wWzGSOV

— PJ Conlon (@pjconlon29) June 6, 2018

ha ha ha

Giants fans should be really excited with Bumgarner back. Now guys like Samardzija, Cueto, can drop the load on their big horse

— Pedro Martinez (@45PedroMartinez) June 6, 2018

https://i.imgur.com/RYADfsJ.png

I have never taken a selfie in my life🤣😂so here it is, happy #NationalSelfieDay everyone!! Let’s see yours,,,BE BLESS!!🙏🏽 pic.twitter.com/pWkswOkAWF

— Bengie Molina (@BengieMolina1) June 21, 2018

great selfie

I look at the first 10 digits of line scores in case one forms a phone number. I found one this year, I can’t tell you the game, that would be intrusive. I called the number, and a guy answered! I hung up without speaking. What was I going to say, your number is a line score?

— Tim Kurkjian (@Kurkjian_ESPN) June 27, 2018

there's a lot of downtime in baseball

Happy 4th you filthy animals pic.twitter.com/xpteIuqTV4

— Joe Kelly Jr. (@JosephKellyJr) July 4, 2018

This is the face of toxic masculinity pic.twitter.com/rhIL6SIW3g

— Mina (@maddc8) July 11, 2018

Some players have racist and offensive old tweets and then there's Lucas Giolito. 😂 pic.twitter.com/tLhoLdNR1N

— Mike (@ChiSoxFanMike) July 18, 2018

pic.twitter.com/zJkYwLYSUq

— Name cannot be blank (@BryonHull) July 22, 2018

follow-up to that: https://deadspin.com/sounds-like-everyone-should-lay-off-that-cubs-fan-who-1827798042

this man wasn't a baseball thief - he actually runs a local charity dedicated to giving away baseballs to the most deserving children in the tri-state area!

but good on him. honestly, i occasionally work in the camera pit at baseball games and have witnessed some of the most pathetic behavior possible re: adults wanting baseballs, so the clip (as it appeared on the surface) didn't surprise me

Brewers acquire Joakim Soria @SenFeinstein 1st

— Jon Heyman (@JonHeyman) July 26, 2018

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DjH4kcqV4AE2Q9X.jpg

hoo boy

well, there are three Twitter teenagers exposed... surely that's the end of it

Please stop digging through my tweets. I’ve already deleted all my tweets about liking pineapple pizza. Thx.

— Trevor Williams (@MeLlamoTrevor) July 30, 2018

"As The Washington Post notes, fan rivalries may have played a role in the revelations about Newcomb and Turner, whose Braves and Nationals compete in the same division. The newspaper observes that the past tweets were dug up by Twitter accounts apparently run by fans of the opposing clubs"

https://www.npr.org/2018/07/30/633933951/offensive-tweets-remind-major-leaguers-that-on-social-media-the-past-is-never-pa

oppo dump c/d?

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/dc-sports-bog/wp/2018/07/30/sean-doolittle-theres-no-place-for-racism-insensitive-language-or-even-casual-homophobia/

JOE BUCK: Welcome to the top of the 47th
[Sun rises]
[Sun keeps getting bigger]
BUCK: yes
[World engulfed by flames]
BUCK: oh god yes

— Justin Klugh (@justin_klugh) October 28, 2015

Sports Twitter canon

I'm sure you're all familiar

https://www.theawl.com/2017/08/five-years-of-crab-rangoon/

Don't try to lecture Mike Clevinger on his long hair. He'll roast you.

We've got your Twitter beef recap ➡️ https://t.co/g7OPNEw4fX pic.twitter.com/QHnipZgNdB

— Yahoo Sports MLB (@MLByahoosports) August 20, 2018

169 actually. Official distance.

— Trevor Bauer (@BauerOutage) August 17, 2018

We see that the time honored tradition of @Indians rehabs affecting the @EasternLeague playoffs is continuing this year. #TravisHafner2008 https://t.co/NirueuvzJA

— Bowie Baysox (@BowieBaysox) September 6, 2018

Well, when you guys make the playoffs, we're sure the @Orioles will have some MLB-quality players to send out on rehab. #2035 https://t.co/C0YpmOlrOP

— Akron RubberDucks (@AkronRubberDuck) September 6, 2018

ethered

I just started typing the words “I got” and my phone’s suggestions for the next word we’re “to,” “for,” and “DFAd.” This is not a joke. It’s just happened that many times.

— Ty Kelly (@tykelly11) October 18, 2018

On this day 46 years ago the American League adopted the designated hitter rule. The age of strategy was gone; that of sophisters, economists, and calculators had succeeded; and the glory of baseball was extinguished forever.

— Bill Kristol (@BillKristol) January 11, 2019

most anyone else and I could detect snark

"Whit Merrifield has one of the best social media accounts in the game" 🤔 pic.twitter.com/rB8slfkZJ9

— Scott Walker's Bald Spot (@TacoAffcionado) January 28, 2019

If we get 1,000,000 RTs, we'll lick the foul pole.

No, we're not warm yet.
Yes, we will do it. pic.twitter.com/aiykd0UpQV

— Cleveland Indians (@Indians) January 30, 2019

if they get 2 million retweets, they'll rename the team?

pokemon that have the same hair as major league players, a thread:

— Shanna Shi (@shanna_shi) January 30, 2019

watching professionla sports teams interact w ewach other in the thread under that cleveland tweet is deeply ufcked up, like, it just hit me really viscerally hard right now how insane a bunch of poorly paid 20 somethings more or less professionally roleplaying a billion dollar organization online is (esp when the org can get in trouble if they do it wrong)

also lol that pokemon thread rules

also leave clint frazier alone, he's on smoko

#ExposBowl Update - End of 1st QTR
🏈 1995 Expos Draft Pick: 0
⚾️ Expos Catcher Jerry Goff’s Son: 0#SBLIII

— Montreal Expos ⚾️ #Expos50 (@Montreal_Expos) February 4, 2019

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Dy0X8XuXgAUPJ-s.jpg:small

The #rays Kevin Cash says they plan on three starters and two days with an opener.

— Neil Solondz (@neilsolondz) February 12, 2019

is opener what we are calling them now? confusing since that's also uhh what we call a game in march

https://www.instagram.com/jarrieta49/p/BucFApIgeDd/

@Morbs

right?? I WANT THIS FEATURE IN ILX SO BAD

Herbs, ranked:

1. Tarragon
2. Chive
3. Dill
4. Cilantro
5. Thai basil
6. Marjoram
7. Mint
8. Bay leaf
9. Thyme
10. Rosemary

— Phil Hughes (@PJHughes45) March 1, 2019

I would have put Herb Tarlek way up there.

sage advice

Umpire cam.

MLB needed this like yesterday. pic.twitter.com/HDHRlfr8xh

— Brodie Brazil (@BrodieNBCS) March 18, 2019

damn that's cool!

that's like a real life the show game

Hrudeycam

I'm sure umpires association will object to it but this is awesome and shld be implemented

i'm not advocating for robot umpires, but....if robot umpires, then there could just be a camera behind the catcher that could capture the same view

kickass data viz:

Top 10 all time @MLB walks by year starting in 1900. 🚶🚶🚶 pic.twitter.com/3PCgqfsPI0

— Daren Willman (@darenw) March 20, 2019

fantastic

das ma shih

Now you're just showing off, @Max_Scherzer. pic.twitter.com/Ucniizt5C0

— MLB (@MLB) March 23, 2019

we don't deserve Joey Votto pic.twitter.com/7AKZxO9qa1

— Sr VP of Trivia (@RedsGM) March 27, 2019

awesome

https://i.imgur.com/AJTreuB.jpg

perhaps not important, just sad

https://nypost.com/2019/04/02/ron-darling-digs-in-lenny-dykstra-has-backers-as-fight-gets-ugly/

who could have guessed

for God's sake don't look at Dykstra's Twitter

2019 Flow Chart Guide to running on A's outfielders pic.twitter.com/Q8Gao2baGq

— Ken Arneson (@kenarneson) April 2, 2019

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/D3WmROKWwAcCCOR.jpg

lmao

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/D4cQsjtUEAIPMUl.jpg:small

Grichuk otm

"let the kids play" "rewrite the rules" ok but in the bottom of the 2nd, down by five runs?

Brendan Rodgers has arrived. Let’s do this @Broddddd3! 👍 pic.twitter.com/o7vQMViMb1

— Colorado Rockies (@Rockies) May 17, 2019

Spotted this guy on the train in Tokyo. Asked, “How ‘bout dem O’s?”

Very dryly he responded in a German accent, “Oh. I see. It’s because of the, uh [points at hat]. I just like the duck. I think it’s cool.” pic.twitter.com/9k0LR62jFj

— Ryan Dorsey (@ElectRyanDorsey) May 18, 2019

ht deadspin

^awesome

pimping homeruns doesn’t matter the planet is dying.

— Ty Kelly (@tykelly11) June 15, 2019

Wow. His bio there is awesome as well.

yeah instant follow!

a Jewish, vegan, extremely online utility man who once led the majors in BB/K ratio :D

He's doing good things in SLC (.294/.378/.374), should be called up to Anaheim soon.

SO HE HAS 68.8 CAREER WAR, THE MOST ANYONE HAS HAD AT HIS AGE. SO IT'S NOT JUST HIS ELITE HITTING, BUT THE FACT THAT HE'S AN EXCELLENT RUNNER AND PLAYS A PREMIUM DEFENSIVE POSITION. HE'S LIKE A HEALTHIER MANTLE. HERE PULL OUT YOUR PHONE AND I'LL SHOW YOU HIS PAGE ON BASEBALL REF- pic.twitter.com/O61y8ycuKE

— Foolish Baseball (@FoolishBB) June 15, 2019

(1957) Splitting time between Brooklyn and Los Angeles could make both sides happy

— Past Fangraphs (@pastfangraphs) June 25, 2019

That page is hilarious.

Often when people move from New York to California they worry about losing their touch. https://t.co/Z8R9OxuAVv

— Richard M. Nixon (@dick_nixon) July 3, 2019

Just a friendly 4th of July reminder that absolutely no one is going to watch the video of fireworks you recorded on your phone

— Dexter Fowler (@DexterFowler) July 4, 2019

Furries

— andrew mccutchen (@TheCUTCH22) July 5, 2019

um

Took extras to beat us again. https://t.co/7JSCL3MUD4 #RaysUp pic.twitter.com/hzYzlK3mDY

— Tampa Bay Rays (@RaysBaseball) July 6, 2019

Put Yadier Molina in the HOF rn pic.twitter.com/Z14SjwLPOW

— RIP TYLER (@PlsBillyEppler) July 8, 2019

yadier molina has already been elected into the hall of fame

One time, while I was catching a game against the Rockies, Troy Tulowotzki didn’t like a low pitch called by the umpire.

He turned to argue, but before he could I said,

“Troy, did you think that pitch was TULO?”

😬😬😬

— John Baker (@manbearwolf) July 26, 2019

There's a lotta stuff going on rn

— Cincinnati Reds (@Reds) July 31, 2019

Guys, we were just chillin at a @rockies baseball game, and my brother decided to step into a speed pitch challenge...he hit 96 mph 😳 @MLB Let’s get him signed! pic.twitter.com/g0fKrvUxzt

— Christian Patterson (@cpatterson_7) July 15, 2019

(check the follow-up, caveat: could be some #viral #astroturfing)

baseball wives and gun control

https://deadspin.com/lucas-giolitos-wife-calls-out-anthony-swarzaks-wife-for-1837068317

Lots of concerns about Gilead but my main question: are there dogs? Because every time June goes sneaking out at night, there are A LOT of dogs barking in the background and I’d just like to know what the deal is. Thx

— Ty Kelly (@tykelly11) August 15, 2019

.@tmorello leads the 3rd Tour Series in @StratOMatic 1-0 hrs searching and coming for my ass yo. Damn Mule Suttles is killing me 4 home runs in the last 2 games . I intentionally walked him the last 3 times at the plate. So Team Morello is coming at me . 10 runs & 3 HRs .. sht pic.twitter.com/oiSkw7QRhy

— Chuck D (@MrChuckD) August 27, 2019

I saw strat in the window of my local game store and basically did the Chris Christie pointing dot jpg as I walked by

Relax Roxane https://t.co/enTB1OpNIv

— Christian Yelich (@ChristianYelich) August 27, 2019

i stand behind you, Christian

BIG SERIES BEGINNING TONIGHT VS. CUBS. OFF DAY WAS GOOD FOR THE METS. THEY ARE AN EMOTIONAL & SPIRITED BUNCH. LIKE TO SEE THEM CALM DOWN EMOTIONALLY DURING GAMES. IT'S TOO DRAINING. MUST STAY ON AN EVEN KEEL. THEY ARE YOUNG AND WILL LEARN. LGM

— keith Hernandez (@keithhernandez) August 27, 2019

I’ve been informed that large caps means screaming. I was not screaming and I won’t use large caps again unless I’m really screaming.

— keith Hernandez (@keithhernandez) August 27, 2019

why isn't he screaming LGM, though?

#apathy

i think you know what happened next

The brothers Moran. pic.twitter.com/cpnJ0YtyrS

— Pirates (@Pirates) September 4, 2019

ive been very away from ilx for a while and just saw that yelich tweet but are they trying to make "relax roxane" the baseball "i'm trying jennifer"?

roxane's original tweet has been deleted so i don't know the context

she was carping at him being a bad influence on kids for posing nude for the espn thing

charlie made a meh-meh

Photo credit: Lindy Powers (1994) pic.twitter.com/PBPUYYLrnt

— Charlie Manuel (@CMBaseball41) September 23, 2019

His twitter name is fried chicken, and he said some weird things to me, so I told him to eat fried chicken for every meal until he dies

— ダルビッシュ有(Yu Darvish) (@faridyu) October 11, 2019

Baseball is uncanceled pic.twitter.com/Dqggkbv8Il

— alyssa, a longtime Nats fan, (@alyssakeiko) October 24, 2019

lmao

waited a long time for that one

that is a hell of a burn

George Will is the worst baseball writer who ever lived. https://t.co/3QaizUDFB4

— Richard M. Nixon (@dick_nixon) October 30, 2019

But for the grace of god did The Mick predate Twitter

https://i2.wp.com/diamondhoggers.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/mantle.jpg?w=590

Yu Darvish is perfect. pic.twitter.com/NUFPdzz5Yw

— Holly (@holly_holl) November 13, 2019

More from thread legend Aubrey Huff.

Aubrey obviously better with a gun than he was with the bat during his Tigers interlude in 2009. Batted .189 with a .567 OPS during his 40 games with Detroit. Stationary targets are, like political enemies, preferred targets of the right. https://t.co/eBZyINjgPs

— Lynn G. Henning (@Lynn_Henning) November 27, 2019

lol

looks like Blake Snell got word of the trade pic.twitter.com/XLzSepKEpN

— DRaysBay (@draysbay) December 6, 2019

Totally agree, Aubrey! I could take instruction from a softball player but not an ex female! Only a current female. https://t.co/b26Ej0zdlH

— Ty Kelly (@tykelly11) January 17, 2020

The Shining. pic.twitter.com/Y1T0gaXNKG

— Amazon Movie Reviews (@AmznMovieRevws) February 7, 2020

haha, whoops:

Favorite moment from the 2019 College Baseball Season

Kumar Rocker with a no hitter thru 6.2 innings in the NCAA Super Regional...

Duke calls an "Offensive Conference" (to mess w/ Rocker's rhythm). Rocker gets the K & screams at Duke's bench 🗣️

Kumar throws a 19K No Hitter 🔥 pic.twitter.com/Dum074XP4U

— Rob Friedman (@PitchingNinja) February 7, 2020

Hahaha

Is that John Rocker's kid jk

they let him throw 131 pitches in that game >:(

anna calcaterra otm

Last night:

Me: Got any homework?

Anna: Nah.

Me: Whatcha gonna do?

Anna: Have a map I’m working on.

Just found this on her desk. pic.twitter.com/9uulpX1Pve

— Craig Calcaterra (@craigcalcaterra) February 12, 2020

First thing I’m doing is changing my bunting rating from a 20 to a 99 Bc I’m an absolute bunting unit https://t.co/ZMVvcqzROU

— Braden Webb (@Bwebb_30) February 13, 2020

Here’s something to make you feel old: Don Kelly turning 40. https://t.co/I7pTiX6oA3

— Jason Beck (@beckjason) February 15, 2020

Mercy. pic.twitter.com/wATyzseOcH

— Lindsey Adler (@lindseyadler) February 16, 2020

of course then racist astros fans responded with pics of yuli gurriel making “Asian eyes” during the World Series a couple of years ago

Commissioner Manfred is hurting baseball, but MLB's wealthy owners don't mind as long as he protects their huge profits. https://t.co/LxFqwnhcXq

— Bernie Sanders (@BernieSanders) February 18, 2020

if Sanders is the nominee he should campaign mainly on baseball, fixing baseball, the guys ruining baseball, etc., also mention giving old people more social security more often

— 'Weird Alex' Pareene (@pareene) February 24, 2020

They are very few of us who can confront the dragon alone

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 24, 2020

Is Jose making a salient point or talking about his dick? Who knows!

maybe it's a steely dan / heroin ref? don't confront the dragon jose, alone or otherwise!

This is Addison Russell’s entire blurb in this year’s @baseballpro annual. pic.twitter.com/Vp6GLEvcip

— Shaker Samman (@ShakerSamman) February 20, 2020

Ryan Zimmerman, Patrick Corbin, Trea Turner, Daniel Hudson and Kurt Suzuki all played golf with Donald Trump in West Palm Beach on Sunday afternoon.

— Jesse Dougherty (@dougherty_jesse) March 9, 2020

what are we even doing, man?

— Andy McCullough (@ByMcCullough) March 12, 2020

otm

A few important public health messages for everyone #ThrowbackThursday style pic.twitter.com/ltaUJXOhN8

— Dick Allen (@DickAllen_15) March 19, 2020

In G2 of the 1998 ALCS, Chuck Knoblauch stopped to argue a call at 1B while the play was live, allowing the go-ahead run to score from first on a bunt. Asked after why he had done something so stupid, Knoblauch said, "We call it the Chinese Virus because it came from China."

— Steven Goldman (@GoStevenGoldman) March 20, 2020

lol

I call trump the woman President because he came from a woman. Look it up

We know you all missed Opening Day as much as we did. In the meantime until we see you again soon, here’s a special message from someone who always makes us feel better. pic.twitter.com/Na3ea1bjMh

— Los Angeles Dodgers (@Dodgers) March 27, 2020

Hello everyone,

Hope all of you are doing good.

These are difficult days and I wanted to know how are you.

I'm doing fine, being careful.

Don't let fear control you and follow the instructions so you can stay healthy.
Thanks to all of you for being here.

— Bill Madlock (@MadlockBill) March 27, 2020

Jason Giambi as sandwiches - a thread pic.twitter.com/rOdiD9yJE0

— jay | certified sopranos expert 🗽 (@jaydestro) March 27, 2020

East Texas long toss #QuarantineLife pic.twitter.com/EV0ROe5DXZ

— Grayson Rodriguez (@G_Rodriguez16) April 2, 2020

S/D Unconventional Stadium Dimensions

(xposted)

cc: @RaysBaseball pic.twitter.com/pQyMhyGOUA

— Adam H. Johnson (@adamjohnsonNYC) April 8, 2020

the mannequins look as lifelike as Cardinal fans

Biden should do this for the DNC imo pic.twitter.com/Vg4sEYWxHt

— Adam H. Johnson (@adamjohnsonNYC) April 13, 2020

the mannequins look as lifelike as Cardinal fans

that's not true. i don't see any of those mannequins cheering wildly for the productive ground ball out to the right side that moved the runner from 2nd to 3rd with still only 1 out, for example

if grapefruit MLB starts up, i'm gonna make a homemade mannequin to sit and watch the games with me at home

will it be a Mike Shannon figure?

the mike shannon figure will reek of budweiser and be draped over a guardrail barfing, just like in normal times

mookie is this your work? :)

*Checks current competition for "baseball's most ferocious sandwich-based logo"* pic.twitter.com/Utck3i9C6b

— Minor League Baseball (@MiLB) April 13, 2020

no . . . but if you see any tweets about randy 'macho man' savage's minor league career, that's probably me

if i was a hat person i'd wear the augusta and trenton ones, maybe start a new streetwear trend

Joe Kelly busting a window while practicing his change up is exactly what this quarantine needed pic.twitter.com/mizSujtHL2

— Allie (@allie_g18) April 16, 2020

yes, posted on the chatter thread. amazing scenes. linchpin of the 2018 postseason!

whoops!

my dad's reply to this video:

'well, he always could through it through a brick wall. IF he hit the brick wall!'

pic.twitter.com/7KJcvMZPME

— Richard M. Nixon (@dick_nixon) April 17, 2020

Several years ago, Kentucky Senator and Hall of Famer Jim Bunning and I were sitting on a bench outside the Otesaga Hotel looking out at the lake. "Promise me you'll never believe anything Mitch McConnell says," Bunning quietly requested. I have upheld Bunning's request.

— Peter Gammons (@pgammo) April 23, 2020

Warms my heart picturing you sitting on the couch thinking about me https://t.co/6TnVQGqhB6

— Ross Stripling (@RossStripling) May 14, 2020

Lol

Last night, my son was shot in the eye with a rubber bullet while peacefully protesting for justice for George Floyd. His story is not unique. Countless others have also experienced this use of excessive police force while trying to have their voices heard.

— Dale Murphy (@DaleMurphy3) June 1, 2020

June 1, 2007: AA Mississippi Braves manager Phillip Wellman with one of the all-time great manager tirades. pic.twitter.com/kHkQV4mIJz

— This Day In Sports Clips (@TDISportsClips) June 1, 2020

What an insufferable dumbass

I just high fived a dude in the grocery isle not wearing his mask like me. We didn’t sanitize after. Wait...that sounded gay. Shit that was politically incorrect.

— Aubrey Huff (@aubrey_huff) June 9, 2020

little fuckin pansies scared of some shit you cain't even see

click through for the full effect:

0 times divorced, but if he keeps walking the lead-off batter, I’ll consider filing 🤔 https://t.co/iAgvPcrazV

— Sara Stock (@sara__stock) September 2, 2020

awwww. they seem great!

Call him a career minor leaguer, call him a journeyman, a failed prospect, a long shot, a lost cause, a little too old, call him what you want. But today, call him a Major League Baseball player.
I am so deeply proud of this man. He waited his whole life for this opportunity... pic.twitter.com/LnV0IOpWjM

— Sara Stock (@sara__stock) June 25, 2018

In @MLB the @astros r now up 2-0 vs @Athletics : happy for @OgSwaggerdick Dusty Baker . Astros sending message we r for real after all the embarrassment caused by cheating in the past .

— Dick Vitale (@DickieV) October 6, 2020

i didn't realize that eric andre was ogswaggerdick dusty baker

and it's unclear whether or not dick vitale realized

LMFAO LETS GO #RaysUp pic.twitter.com/DSqLnVIklj

— Manuel Mar🐐 (@Tuataggy) October 10, 2020

https://twitter.com/juanctoribio/status/131480074813641113

Randy Arozarena posts the dance battle against Brett Phillips on his Instagram. He said: “Today I took home the crown. I won my rematch.”

Phillips and Arozarena are now tied. pic.twitter.com/OvteU49zQd

— Juan Toribio (@juanctoribio) October 10, 2020

Good lord

I made an embarrassingly stupid mistake, believing I was off-camera. I apologize to my wife, family, friends and coworkers. I believed I was not visible on Zoom, as there's a drive into deep left field by Castellanos and that'll be a homerun. And so that'll make it a 4-0 ballgame

— Emma Baccelleerie 🎃 (@emmabaccellieri) October 19, 2020

far be it for me to judge a working writer but she's missing out on Booccelleerie imo

you can't tell me that tweet isn't just from an episode of brockmire

Let’s take a vote .How about we have a Bobby Bonilla day every year .Hand him an oversized check and drive a lap around the stadium.Could be fun

— Steven Cohen (@StevenACohen2) November 20, 2020

I'm not sure if this is cool or kind of needy...both?

Here are my 2 Gold Gloves and Silver Slugger! pic.twitter.com/j7FvDu3Kr5

— Jesse Barfield (@JesseBarfield29) November 24, 2020

Maybe the only Jays history I was ever present for: Barfield's 40th HR in 1986, first Jay to do so.

i saw jesse hit many home runs through the windows of the textile mill behind bill meyer stadium in knoxville tennessee when i was very young. one night he broke his bat and my dad asked the batboy if he could have it. quite a treasure now.

Excellent. He was awesome in '85 and '86--Rickey Henderson was better, maybe Dale Murphy, and that was it for outfielders. Years after I saw that game he was at the Skydome for autographs; I of course mentioned being there when he hit his 40th, and--as is usually the case with baseball players--he remembered the pitcher, the count, the pitch, everything.

I’ve been saving this anecdote for a story, but screw it. Too good to squirrel away.

Someone suggested Rays pitcher Tyler Glasnow try to get angry before starts. To do this, he would look at pictures of one person. He pulled out his phone and showed me.

It was Martin Shkreli. pic.twitter.com/TJHpgp1iTE

— Jeff Passan (@JeffPassan) December 21, 2020

oh my god

astounding

wow, that's a great anecdote

I’m fighting tonight for everyone who’s tired of Barstool Sports being on the internet

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 5, 2021

Luis Guillorme drew a 22-pitch walk in the 5th inning. Relive the entire at-bat right here 😤 😤 😤 pic.twitter.com/cS57po7ulf

— SNY (@SNYtv) March 14, 2021

i was there

watching on tv i mean

he's the guy that casually caught the flying bat a couple years ago

he rules

That’s nuts. Was that a fluke, or is this guy some quick-hands god?!

he is in fact a quick-hands god

i will give you this heavily cardinals-centered answer: that was jordan hicks' first appearance since 2019, when he had tommy john. the weird thing with him, his whole career, is that he doesn't have a high strikeout %, despite a 104 mph fastball and a wicker slider that's even better. it is bizarre. i am not a pitching expert or stats pro, i have no idea why this happens. but he has always been a pitcher that quickly gets to 2 strikes and then induces weak contact. he's awesome. i love him. he's great. but of all pitchers to have a 22-pitch walk, it's him

and it's pretty amazing that the average MLB player can at least make consistent contact on 104 mph

every time i watch him pitch, it's like a wholesome reminder that "these guys are good"

that is cardinals-centric, but also i feel like it might be more relevant than this 80 wRC+ rookie's contact skillz, that's right, sick BURN on the mets, i am officially RE-IGNITING the CARDINALS-METS RIVALRY, and i guarantee 100% cardinal victories this season, starting now, in spring training, right now

the METS do DRUGS

and the mid-80s cardinals do NOT do DRUGS!

luis guillorme is, by every measure for years on end, a defensive genius. also he caught that bat out of fucking mid-air.

dude would be a fucking folk hero in pittsburgh but instead he'll be quad-a fodder in syracuse

the mid-80s cardinals do NOT do DRUGS!

https://i.imgur.com/spdyfDE.png

Get his ass

*and my parents naming me Dick Staff.

Fixed it https://t.co/bZDGXI7Umn

— Noah Syndergaard (@Noahsyndergaard) April 9, 2021

Baseball fans need to watch more cricket and appreciate baseball's relative brevity

No thanks

T20 is basically the length of a baseball game, no?

It’s kitten season 😽⚾️ pic.twitter.com/4PTYhIWWuD

— Charlie Manuel (@CMBaseball41) June 10, 2021

You know what fucking time it is. https://t.co/T7BjGKiAby

— David Roth (@david_j_roth) June 28, 2021

idgi

“Remember Some guys” is a low level sports meme

Guess it hasnt made it to the old country yet

i have to admit, i had totally forgotten about puig and russell, and thought was A. Gonzalez had long stopped playing

feel like a Guy I Remember fairly often is Wilin Rosario, on account of i thought he was gonna be the next great hitting catcher at one point lol

Bob Melvin said he watches Friends reruns after losses. Seen every episode. So I had to ask: did Ross cheat on Rachel, or were they on a break?

"Don't even get me started on that," he said. "I do have some ideas on that but I'm not going there. That's a loaded question, Steve."

— Steve Berman (@BASportsGuy) July 24, 2021

Ha ha!

Chipper Jones raw dogged every Hooters waitress between Chattanooga and Tampa but scared of the jab? Make it make sense. Still love the guy but the math ain’t math-ing there!

— Everyone Hates Chris (@ckssense) March 12, 2022

loool

https://i.imgur.com/aFvAW3A.jpg

not fair someone should be that good at baseball and that good at twitter

Pour one out for the Rays’ ballboy pic.twitter.com/69fN1dU1mi

— Ben Palmer (@benjpalmer) July 16, 2022

Not baseball per se BUT

pic.twitter.com/KXyqUQEuI9

— meaning machine (@EricThurm) November 2, 2022

as soon as i read the first tweet i knew what the second would be

I'm sure Aaron Judge is reaching for his phone as I type.

Aaron judge I am getting ready for you let's see if you can hit a baseball as far as I can hit a softball I doubt that very much let me know when you're ready we'll do the competition for charity pic.twitter.com/riWXN8Z878

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) January 5, 2023

(Is punctuation considered bad form on Twitter, or is it that you're wasting precious character count? That tweet reminds me of 10,000 student journal entries I marked.)

real ballers don’t need punctuation

the lack of punctuation is just part of what makes him a Tru Poster

It's possible he was influenced by Ulysses.

if you're not for canseco, you are against canseco. and he thrives on competition, so watch out

I TROLLED JOSE CANSECO

His strikeout vs me this year shouldn’t count

— Andrew McCutchen (@TheCUTCH22) September 21, 2023