i for one am excited to determine the fate of the australian building and construction commission

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it's critical for the nation to have its say about whether the powers of the watchdog should be slightly more coercive than they are now or remain approximately as coercive as they are now

Autumn Almanac, Sunday, 8 May 2016 12:25 (eight years ago) link

Fellas, I don't want to scare you but: TRADE UNIONS

David Goey (King Boy Pato), Sunday, 8 May 2016 12:35 (eight years ago) link

witch hunt royal commission now

Autumn Almanac, Monday, 9 May 2016 00:11 (eight years ago) link

duncan is a terrible terrible man who needs our help must be crushed so that the australian building and construction commission can acquire slightly increased powers

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 12 May 2016 02:03 (eight years ago) link

Turnbull is such a pus-filled shithead

And a shit filled pus head.

Stoop Crone (Trayce), Thursday, 12 May 2016 03:02 (eight years ago) link

yeah, and saying "oh but the party won't let him do what he wants to do" isn't good enough, he's the leader and can make better choices and pick the not-cruel battles

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 12 May 2016 03:54 (eight years ago) link

exactly. you don't sell what little soul you have for power and get to pretend you're better than that.

incredible how he's always been "yes marriage equality" then gets in and commits to abbott's bigoted bullshit $200m not-even-binding plebiscite

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 12 May 2016 05:02 (eight years ago) link

"the people deserve a say"

no

they don't

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 12 May 2016 05:03 (eight years ago) link

"the people" are fuckwits who think offshore detention is protecting us from something. if having these fuckers in charge didn't hit me and my family too, i'd say Australia deserves everything it gets voting the coalition back in again

same

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 12 May 2016 06:07 (eight years ago) link

welp Murdoch ruins another family and their lives, must be a day ending in 'y'

David Goey (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 12 May 2016 12:42 (eight years ago) link

mentally ill bloke who has had trouble with the law and is paid $520 per fortnight from Austudy >>>>>>>>> Hitler

David Goey (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 12 May 2016 12:45 (eight years ago) link

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CiQIAJzVEAA7bIW.jpg

the day rupert murdoch dies in a vat of his own fucking vomit will be the single happiest day of my entire life

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 12 May 2016 13:53 (eight years ago) link

if this guy has convictions — IF — he's done his time and doesn't need to be penalised all over again ~10 years later by a rabid fuckhead who doesn't approve of a single generic question he asked on the public broadcaster

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 12 May 2016 14:00 (eight years ago) link

at last, words of advice from the voice literally nobody asked to hear

Autumn Almanac, Friday, 13 May 2016 04:47 (eight years ago) link

I dunno, I guess I am okay with The Tone Government-In-Exile bringing down this pissweak-and-still-sending-12 month old babies-to-island-prision-camps government if it works.

David Goey (King Boy Pato), Friday, 13 May 2016 08:20 (eight years ago) link

The Tone Government-In-Exile

opposition leader berg shipton tony abbott

Autumn Almanac, Friday, 13 May 2016 08:25 (eight years ago) link

oh, i'm happy if they bring them down, i just don't believe it will happen, and in the meantime I don't want to ever hear from her again

that makes 25 million of us

Autumn Almanac, Friday, 13 May 2016 11:19 (eight years ago) link

well I understand that Peta will be exclusively appearing on Sky News so, yes, nobody will hear from her again

David Goey (King Boy Pato), Friday, 13 May 2016 13:49 (eight years ago) link

coming up next on credlin: seeeething entitlement

Autumn Almanac, Friday, 13 May 2016 14:00 (eight years ago) link

er did anyone see bloop straddle talk to the public in complete sentences tonight, also I understand malcolm turnbull was there

David Goey (King Boy Pato), Friday, 13 May 2016 14:23 (eight years ago) link

apparently bert strangle romped it in and mal alternated between raw condescension and being all over the place

Autumn Almanac, Friday, 13 May 2016 14:24 (eight years ago) link

mal 29, shegdon 42, undecided 29

29 is a huge undecided number for a murdoch-staged event with more than zero lnp speakers

Autumn Almanac, Friday, 13 May 2016 14:27 (eight years ago) link

good on ya bangle shogun

reckon mal got the 29 for just showing up in ~western sydney~, I would have been impressed that he rocked up

David Goey (King Boy Pato), Friday, 13 May 2016 14:29 (eight years ago) link

they were asked about banks, beef shortbread offered to set up a royal commission and mal said he spoke very sternly to some banker mates at a westpac office party (i am not making this up)

Autumn Almanac, Friday, 13 May 2016 14:37 (eight years ago) link

can't believe malcolm turnbull bloop scotch wants to piss away money on a marriage equality plebiscite royal commission into the banks

David Goey (King Boy Pato), Friday, 13 May 2016 14:57 (eight years ago) link

http://theaimn.com/is-everybody-happy-now/

Duncan is now under suicide watch. His poor mum can’t bare to lose another child – she’s already buried one son.

This week, Duncan has been pushed to the brink of suicide. The character assassination needs to stop.

so uh mission accomplished?

Autumn Almanac, Saturday, 14 May 2016 03:06 (eight years ago) link

fucking the day rupert murdoch dies of asphyxiation in his own rancid shit i will be buying drinks for everyone

everyone

Autumn Almanac, Saturday, 14 May 2016 03:07 (eight years ago) link

all hail peter 'lizard boy' dutton, the new king of the dog whistle

David Goey (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 18 May 2016 22:54 (eight years ago) link

We should get on that darknet guess-the-death-day hitman website for dutton, all chip in a few dollars

funny how the worst bigots are also the stupidest people

xp dutton will die the day he tries to reach the last biscuit in the biscuit barrel and his head gets stuck

Autumn Almanac, Wednesday, 18 May 2016 23:09 (eight years ago) link

** Di Natale 'forgets' to claim farm and underpaid au pairs, 'all politicians are hella dodgy' shocker
** AFP raids ALP because someone told them that the Libs' NBN is shithouse
** Lizard Boy taunts asylum seekers with his exceptional mastery of the English language

David Goey (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 19 May 2016 10:32 (eight years ago) link

transgender is literally hitler

Autumn Almanac, Wednesday, 1 June 2016 03:07 (eight years ago) link

Huge news: MALCOLM TURNBULL HAD A FATHER, POSSIBLY WAS WELL OFF

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Monday, 6 June 2016 09:49 (eight years ago) link

DID UNION STOOGE BILL SHORTEN HAVE A FATHER???

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Monday, 6 June 2016 09:49 (eight years ago) link

Malcolm turnbull has lived in flat, is man of the people

Turnbull said he would not take part in Sky’s people’s forum on Wednesday night – even though Bill Shorten would be attending – and he criticised Sky News for neglecting protocol and then pressuring him to attend.

“Sky News announced they were inviting me and Bill Shorten to attend a debate on a particular night,” he said. “What we’ve said, normally you would have approached us and sought to come to some arrangement.

“(Sky) chose not to do that and to issue in effect is a decree, and we’ve said no.”

lolwut

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 7 June 2016 09:46 (eight years ago) link

it really is the Tone News Network

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 7 June 2016 09:51 (eight years ago) link

turnbull pisses off murdoch-> murdoch retaliates -> turnbull loses -> australia wins

Autumn Almanac, Tuesday, 7 June 2016 10:01 (eight years ago) link

leigh sales: [difficult question]
malcom turnbull: jobs and growth and jobs and growth and jobs and and and growth

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 8 June 2016 11:32 (eight years ago) link

half of sky news is sorta nice to beige now hmmmm

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 8 June 2016 11:33 (eight years ago) link

have no access to sky news, but a channel that appears to give shows to people like andrew bolt and alan jones can go fuck itself

Turnbull refuses to remove the GST on womens sanitary products. Might I remind the men in the audience that razors are GST free.

Apparently "we cant afford" the revenue loss. Its only 30 million fricking dollars.

Stoop Crone (Trayce), Thursday, 9 June 2016 00:54 (eight years ago) link

I don't even use a razor because i'm unkempt. Women don't get to so easily say, 'Ah, no need for pads for me!'.

it's hard to see how any prospective leader wouldn't score a net win by removing gst from sanitary products. this more than anything indicates just how fucked up aust political discourse has become in the last 15 years.

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 9 June 2016 01:53 (eight years ago) link

Apparently some time in the recent past Shorten gave the govt shit for NOT removing it. Now he's all 'well we arent gonna lie about what we can and cant afford in this budget, so too bad, its not happening'

At least he's honest?

Doesnt affect me personally anyway (implanon is the best) but yeah, its a womens vote winner and he's a twat.

I'll prob still vote labor anyway. Im still registered in melb ports and Danby's unfuckwithable and has been in the seat for like 30 years or something insane.

Stoop Crone (Trayce), Thursday, 9 June 2016 01:58 (eight years ago) link

its a womens vote winner

but what about meeeeeennnnnn

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 9 June 2016 02:05 (eight years ago) link

danby's telling everyone who'll listen that the greens hate jews, which seems to be provoking caulfield/balaclava into asking what the actual facts are

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 9 June 2016 02:07 (eight years ago) link

in fact all i ever hear about danby is that he's vaguely pissed off about something or other, never that he's done a or b or c for the electorate

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 9 June 2016 02:10 (eight years ago) link

I'm in Mayo, hoping like hell we'll finally see the back of safe-seat-warmer Jamie Briggs

Yeah Danby is odd - my other half does some work for him (poster design) and its all this weird anti-Iran shit.

Stoop Crone (Trayce), Thursday, 9 June 2016 02:58 (eight years ago) link

hmm

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 9 June 2016 04:16 (eight years ago) link

danby's telling everyone who'll listen that the greens hate jews

my local Labor member was recently bleating that a vote for liberal was a vote for the dismantling of capitalism, because they hadn't explicitly ruled out preference deals with Greens yet

glandular lansbury (sic), Thursday, 9 June 2016 04:52 (eight years ago) link

fuck it what's truth any more

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 9 June 2016 05:13 (eight years ago) link

he and other local once-admirable ALP members were on community radio this week saying it's unfair how the Greens only campaign & try to get members up in selected electorates, whereas Labor have to campaign across the whole of Australia

glandular lansbury (sic), Thursday, 9 June 2016 05:21 (eight years ago) link

The ALP can go fuck itself. It has sold out so many of its once-values, and now it bleats about a party that's actually willing to NOT make some compromises for power. The whingeing torture/rape camp-enabling pricks can see the results of their lack of spine in their shrivelling support, but they still don't see how to stop it.

he and other local once-admirable ALP members were on community radio this week saying it's unfair how the Greens only campaign & try to get members up in selected electorates, whereas Labor have to campaign across the whole of Australia

― glandular lansbury (sic), Thursday, 9 June 2016 15:21 (16 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

the greens can't sponge off the coffers of massively wealthy corporate donors but hey

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 9 June 2016 05:55 (eight years ago) link

It has sold out so many of its once-values, and now it bleats about a party that's actually willing to NOT make some compromises for power.

this exactly is the problem. i don't even know why the alp exists now. it cherry picks policy positions from the liberals, from the nationals, from the greens etc., and then it moans that the greens are interfering or whatever. if the alp hadn't abandoned its fucking base the greens wouldn't have scooped it up. and as far as the lnp goes, stop being pricks to foreigners in rickety boats and we'll stop accusing you of being like the lnp.

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 9 June 2016 05:57 (eight years ago) link

fuck.

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 9 June 2016 05:57 (eight years ago) link

stop actively promising to carry out almost all the policies of the LNP and we'll stop etc etc

glandular lansbury (sic), Thursday, 9 June 2016 08:02 (eight years ago) link

basically James OTM

glandular lansbury (sic), Thursday, 9 June 2016 08:02 (eight years ago) link

I'm in Mayo, hoping like hell we'll finally see the back of safe-seat-warmer Jamie Briggs

that would be quite good but do you really want a Xenophon nutbag

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 9 June 2016 10:14 (eight years ago) link

my local Labor member was recently bleating that a vote for liberal was a vote for the dismantling of capitalism, because they hadn't explicitly ruled out preference deals with Greens yet

well I suspect this was a poor Beige Curtain-esque zinger attempt

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 9 June 2016 10:15 (eight years ago) link

can I just say: I have concerns about the Di Natale/Bandt-turtleneck Victorian hipster wing of the Greens (Di Natale did impress me and made me overlook the very odd way he took over as leader but recent developments have raised eyebrows) and the unreconstructed shouty stans of the NSW Greens

basically this isn't your dad's Bob Brown Greens and they should have gone with Ludlam as leader

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 9 June 2016 10:19 (eight years ago) link

in summary: Vote 1 Bullet Train For Australia Party

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 9 June 2016 10:22 (eight years ago) link

Ludlam didn't want, nor believe himself to be qualified, to be Greens leader, and was not in contention.

glandular lansbury (sic), Thursday, 9 June 2016 10:53 (eight years ago) link

having seen him on kitchen cabinet tonight i don't know how he'd cope with all the attention tbh

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 9 June 2016 11:07 (eight years ago) link

Do like lydlam a lit, and yes the greens arent perfect, but i go along with maybe 80% of their policies, and given that the environment and treatment of refugees are my main concerns, theyre the only party with anything useful or sensible to say

Ludlam, not lydlam, sorry, ipad fingers

the fact that he considered himself not worthy probably makes him more worthy, will have to have a look out on the Kitchen Cabinet appearance however

Larissa Waters would be good too

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 9 June 2016 11:24 (eight years ago) link

expect the big news story tomorrow morning will be Greg Hunt getting blocked by Ellen on Twitter, I would put money on it as nobody has been racist for several hours

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 9 June 2016 11:42 (eight years ago) link

as nobody has been racist for several hours

actually laughed out loud at this

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 9 June 2016 12:08 (eight years ago) link

I adore ScottyLud but yeah hes not leader material.

Stoop Crone (Trayce), Friday, 10 June 2016 00:40 (eight years ago) link

https://twitter.com/petermadden2u/status/742211894908321793

australia has reached a new low

Autumn Almanac, Monday, 13 June 2016 07:48 (eight years ago) link

pasting the full tweet here before the fucking savage deletes it:

Though Orlando is abhorrent, it doesn't change the real & present dangers of the gay marriage agenda to Aus children.

a person actually said that, in real life, without irony or satire or apparently self-awareness

Autumn Almanac, Monday, 13 June 2016 07:52 (eight years ago) link

"person"

good point well made

Autumn Almanac, Monday, 13 June 2016 08:33 (eight years ago) link

"what a dickhe-- ah, family first candidate, that explains it"

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 14 June 2016 09:29 (eight years ago) link

FUN FACT: The Coalition is preferencing for the Senate, ahead of any other party, in New South Wales, Tasmania, the Northern Territory & the Australian Capital Territory... Fred Nile's Christian Democratic Party.

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 14 June 2016 09:34 (eight years ago) link

aw, and I was looking forward to not numbering every single box, for the first time ever (have always done it so as to put Fred or Elaine last)

glandular lansbury (sic), Tuesday, 14 June 2016 10:45 (eight years ago) link

fuckheads

Autumn Almanac, Tuesday, 14 June 2016 11:45 (eight years ago) link

htv cards should be banned outright

Autumn Almanac, Tuesday, 14 June 2016 11:46 (eight years ago) link

they're by the corrupt, for the imbecilic

They should just force everyone to vote BTL fully so this stupid fucking preferencing shit is done with once and for all.

Stoop Crone (Trayce), Wednesday, 15 June 2016 00:06 (eight years ago) link

oh my god did you hear that LABOR IS ADOPTING GREEN POLICIES**

** - well apart from that "not sending asylum seekers to inhumane island prison camps" policy

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 15 June 2016 14:00 (eight years ago) link

ikr, it's like labor doesn't have an identity

Autumn Almanac, Wednesday, 15 June 2016 14:34 (eight years ago) link

at least I get the chance to vote for someone, with mostly sensible policies, called Meow-Ludo Disco Gamma Meow-Meow

glandular lansbury (sic), Wednesday, 15 June 2016 14:52 (eight years ago) link

heyo you need to ask QGP about the Meow-Ludo Disco Gamma Meow-Meow story

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 15 June 2016 21:30 (eight years ago) link

heyo you need to ask QGP about the Meow-Ludo Disco Gamma Meow-Meow story

oh does QGP have a Meow-Ludo Disco Gamma Meow-Meow story?

glandular lansbury (sic), Thursday, 16 June 2016 09:05 (eight years ago) link

^ like the opening lines to the worst thought-through knock-knock joke ever

oh does QGP have a Meow-Ludo Disco Gamma Meow-Meow story?

yes QGP has a Meow-Ludo Disco Gamma Meow-Meow story

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 16 June 2016 11:33 (eight years ago) link

[cut to Liberal Party HQ]

'hmmm we got a marginal seat here, labor only has it by 0.2 per cent...'

'get the pizza bloke'

'uh I don't...'

'get him!'

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 16 June 2016 11:35 (eight years ago) link

please can we hear the Meow-Ludo Disco Gamma Meow-Meow story

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 16 June 2016 23:09 (eight years ago) link

wellllllll it involves certain substances if you get me drift

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Friday, 17 June 2016 10:46 (eight years ago) link

turns out that bloop stanton is better at the Facebook than the inventor of the internet, great stuff

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Friday, 17 June 2016 10:47 (eight years ago) link

https://www.buzzfeed.com/aliceworkman/a-b-double-d

Ironically, if the Turnbull government is re-elected on July 2, it might not have the numbers it needs to pass the ABCC legislation.

another dd then?

Autumn Almanac, Tuesday, 21 June 2016 08:12 (eight years ago) link

get blunt snoozy close enough then let basque slippery actually win the damn second election

well I knew Malcolm was left-wing but jeez whiz Andrew you were right about this

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 21 June 2016 13:01 (eight years ago) link

this morbsian wordplay has finally outpaced me

glandular lansbury (sic), Tuesday, 21 June 2016 13:52 (eight years ago) link

prime minister bung shaka

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 22 June 2016 09:53 (eight years ago) link

prime minister belch snazzy

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 22 June 2016 09:53 (eight years ago) link

prime minister basted slurpee has just let 500,000 muslim terrorist refugees in and allowed the greens to squat in mum & dad's investment property

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 22 June 2016 09:55 (eight years ago) link

prime minister malcolm 'lives in the 21st century' turnbull will let us vote on marriage equality but his party won't even if we do because hurrrrrrr

also; labor needs to stop over-egging the medicare tilt (we get it, we get it, stop giving the right wing press some ammunition), hype up marriage equality a bit more, really hype up that Brexit is due to a massive gap in opportunity and outcome in pommieland and, oh oh oh, mention negative gearing reform more to get the under-40s hyped up

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Sunday, 26 June 2016 11:59 (eight years ago) link

vote for this: <photo of mal>

get this: <photo of tone>

spoken by b. hunter for the australian labor party canberra

--> labor wins 142 seats

Autumn Almanac, Sunday, 26 June 2016 12:25 (eight years ago) link

if it's tone eating the onion, they'll get the full senate too

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Sunday, 26 June 2016 12:40 (eight years ago) link

<wink>

--> labor takes all states & territories

Autumn Almanac, Sunday, 26 June 2016 12:47 (eight years ago) link

the plebiscite still doesn't have proposed legislation or question text or a date, and the crackpots want to rig the count so it structurally favours bigots, and a 'yes' vote would only mean the party will then consider whether they should think about having a vote, and half the party's said they'll ignore it and vote 'no' anyway, but sure good policy why not

Autumn Almanac, Wednesday, 29 June 2016 02:09 (eight years ago) link

vote 'yes' for us to have a think about whether or not 45% of the chamber can be fucked thinking about having a vote on something or other that's ~secret~, trust us

vote 'no' because gay is icky

Autumn Almanac, Wednesday, 29 June 2016 02:11 (eight years ago) link

imagen if we had a vote on if black people are actually people and can vote and such

in 2016, not 1967

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 29 June 2016 11:56 (eight years ago) link

where's my fucken referendum on the republic, mal

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 29 June 2016 11:57 (eight years ago) link

imagen if we had a vote on if black people are actually people and can vote and such

in 2016, not 1967

LET THE PEOPLE HAVE THEIR SAY, if the bigots win then the oppressed are victims only of democracy

DEMOCRACY

Autumn Almanac, Wednesday, 29 June 2016 23:51 (eight years ago) link

voted. pre-polling was as packed as election day usually is.

glandular lansbury (sic), Friday, 1 July 2016 04:26 (eight years ago) link

that slick empty motherfucker's getting back in again, isn't he?

Best we can hope for is a hung senate and an expanded green stronghold in inner Melbourne, which probably means an immediate leadership spill for labour and one in 12-18 months for the liberals.

American Fear of Pranksterism (Ed), Friday, 1 July 2016 04:39 (eight years ago) link

i lost hope in australia a long time ago

Autumn Almanac, Friday, 1 July 2016 05:26 (eight years ago) link

I'm praying for mojo

I mean a hung parliament

Stoop Crone (Trayce), Friday, 1 July 2016 05:29 (eight years ago) link

that slick empty motherfucker's getting back in again, isn't he?

He hasn't gotten in once yet, remember

glandular lansbury (sic), Friday, 1 July 2016 05:43 (eight years ago) link

remember this election is a referendum on the slightly altered powers of the australian building and construction commission

Autumn Almanac, Friday, 1 July 2016 06:16 (eight years ago) link

hung parliament: okay, I am okay with this

several One Nation senators: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I'M OUTTA HERE

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Saturday, 2 July 2016 12:20 (eight years ago) link

Technical question, assuming the next senate election is not another DD, which senators get tossed first?

American Fear of Pranksterism (Ed), Saturday, 2 July 2016 12:29 (eight years ago) link

I thiiiiiiiiink they chuck out the 6 who got fewer votes in each state, but ca not remember that for sure

whoever gets elected to the first six years get the full two-cycle term but Senate election/quotas are a ~dark art~

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Saturday, 2 July 2016 14:16 (eight years ago) link

maybe there won't be a fucking plebiscite now

Autumn Almanac, Sunday, 3 July 2016 03:58 (eight years ago) link

Its about marriage, not fucking

give it time... cory bernardi may just yet grow his Senate power base

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Sunday, 3 July 2016 21:58 (eight years ago) link

it'd be interesting if bernardi abstained from a crucial vote because he just couldn't get his dick out of that horse

Autumn Almanac, Monday, 4 July 2016 00:51 (eight years ago) link

So 2 things:
- how is Hanson able to run for office again when she was jailed for electoral fraud!?!?
- how is Hinch able to run for office when he's proudly been a non-voter all his life?

Stoop Crone (Trayce), Monday, 4 July 2016 06:52 (eight years ago) link

AND BOTH OF THEM WIN.

Stoop Crone (Trayce), Monday, 4 July 2016 06:52 (eight years ago) link

and hinch has been imprisoned at least twice that i can remember iirc

Flamenco Drop (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, 4 July 2016 07:35 (eight years ago) link

Sadly, hansons conviction was overturned

Gerry harvey can go stuff one of his cheapo hard drives up his arse

this is still going onnnnnn

labor: thanks for the support and lol malcolm you suck but you need to make this work
liberal: MEDIIIIIIIIIISCAREEEEE U MEAN

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 5 July 2016 10:23 (eight years ago) link

Nice to see turnbull in the shit, long overdue comeuppance on its way

i love how he was all "this is my fault, i take full responsibility, we must not blame everyone else, btw how fucking scab was that labor mediscare campaign ruining my election and all the getup protesters rigging tasmania jfc"

Autumn Almanac, Tuesday, 5 July 2016 13:52 (eight years ago) link

And Julie Bishop and Scott Fuckface Morrison being all, "We have listened, we take on board the criticisms!" But when asked what their faults were, they say, "Our campaign was too positive."

loooooooool

Autumn Almanac, Wednesday, 6 July 2016 01:58 (eight years ago) link

they refuse to acknowledge that their relentless attack on 90% of australians destroyed their vote, and that turnbull's smiley face and relative lack of baggage only saved some of the furniture

Autumn Almanac, Wednesday, 6 July 2016 02:01 (eight years ago) link

three weeks pass...

Remember when Andrew Denton tried to hire a bounty hunter to get Christopher Skase? I reckon a kickstarter to kidnap George Pell and force him back to Australia might get quite a lot of funding.

hey, then pell could call for an investigation into kickstarter too

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 28 July 2016 01:33 (eight years ago) link

half-expecting pell to issue a statement to the victims saying "sorry if you were raped"

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 28 July 2016 01:35 (eight years ago) link

people who take rejection very well and don't try to get revenge afterwards: kevin rudd

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Friday, 29 July 2016 13:55 (eight years ago) link

Mr Rudd had previously received vocal support from former Liberal leader Brendan Nelson, though South Australian Liberal senator Cory Bernardi had urged his colleagues not to endorse a "dysfunctional", "vengeful", "unstable", "megalomaniac" like Mr Rudd.

I mean

Shakey δσς (sic), Friday, 29 July 2016 16:23 (eight years ago) link

one seat majority babey

part of that one seat majority: george christensen

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 2 August 2016 10:46 (eight years ago) link

ugh

Autumn Almanac, Tuesday, 2 August 2016 10:47 (eight years ago) link

and good ol' onion boy

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 2 August 2016 10:50 (eight years ago) link

fuck

Autumn Almanac, Tuesday, 2 August 2016 10:52 (eight years ago) link

Sources have confirmed the Federal Cabinet voted 11 to 10 in favour of nominating Rudd but it was Prime Minister who made the final decision not to support him

oh man I had missed Kevern related cabinet leaks

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 2 August 2016 11:28 (eight years ago) link

three months pass...

remember when it was such a good idea to hold a double dissolution

[points out that Ricky Muir, The People's Senator, is no longer and the house of review is populated by One Nation nutbags going off about global warming conspiracies]

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Saturday, 19 November 2016 13:26 (eight years ago) link

anyway here's more outright racist guff from potatohead boy

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Saturday, 19 November 2016 13:27 (eight years ago) link

we're three years into what america is about to enter

Autumn Almanac, Sunday, 20 November 2016 07:27 (eight years ago) link

give us a wave

Flamenco Drop (VegemiteGrrl), Sunday, 20 November 2016 07:30 (eight years ago) link

hugs is more appropriate tbh

so hugs

Autumn Almanac, Sunday, 20 November 2016 07:56 (eight years ago) link

<3

Flamenco Drop (VegemiteGrrl), Sunday, 20 November 2016 15:47 (eight years ago) link

And we don't even require people to vote

El Tomboto, Sunday, 20 November 2016 16:21 (eight years ago) link

one month passes...

so, how 'bout these ministerial rorts

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 10 January 2017 12:24 (seven years ago) link

these ministerial rorts while vulnerable members of our society are considering suicide over this fucking centrelink debacle

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 10 January 2017 12:37 (seven years ago) link

m8 you don't understand, the poor are bleeding this country dry with all their accrued debt that doesn't exist

Autumn Almanac, Tuesday, 10 January 2017 22:35 (seven years ago) link

if only they respected taxpayers' money, like sussan ley

Autumn Almanac, Tuesday, 10 January 2017 22:36 (seven years ago) link

welp another LNP 46 / ALP 54 2PP poll result

LIIIIIIIIIIIIBBBBSSSSSPPPPPIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLL

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 24 January 2017 10:54 (seven years ago) link

Malcolm "Even Less Popular Than Tone" Turnbull, folks.

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Tuesday, 24 January 2017 10:55 (seven years ago) link

sco mo fucking mentum

Autumn Almanac, Tuesday, 24 January 2017 12:48 (seven years ago) link

Libs should be smart enough to realise Tone did the damage and there's nothing to be gained by putting someone else unpopular and useless up front with 3 years to go

(±\ PLO;;;;;;; Style (sic), Wednesday, 25 January 2017 05:55 (seven years ago) link

Libs should be smart

rest of your sentence is redundant imo

Autumn Almanac, Wednesday, 25 January 2017 05:57 (seven years ago) link

Libs should be smart enough to realise Tone did the damage and there's nothing to be gained by putting someone else unpopular and useless up front with 3 years to go

a) they aren't
b) mal is plenty unpopular and useless anyway
c) word on the street is that certain libs want to double down with potatohead boy

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 25 January 2017 10:32 (seven years ago) link

potatohead boy

does
not
narrow
it
down

Autumn Almanac, Wednesday, 25 January 2017 13:23 (seven years ago) link

point taken, (a) i can't see that guy being the leader of so much as a stapler and (b) they are all fucking potatoes

Autumn Almanac, Wednesday, 25 January 2017 14:25 (seven years ago) link

scott: potato
tony: potato
bronwyn: potato
barnyard: potato
george: potato
arthur: potato
the current pm (forgotten his name, the rich guy with the internets): potato

Autumn Almanac, Wednesday, 25 January 2017 14:31 (seven years ago) link

a) well I once thought onion boy couldn't lead a pair of scissors but then
b) potatohead boy has allegedly taken over the far right from onion boy
c) read a tweet about how not even scomo was mentioned in potential rollings
d) but he was
e) sorry that I cannot find the tweet
f) I think it was a genuine one
g) happy invasion day, people

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 25 January 2017 14:33 (seven years ago) link

also I take offence that you have forgotten malclot turnip's name

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Wednesday, 25 January 2017 14:33 (seven years ago) link

i mean this is wall to wall fucking depressing

Autumn Almanac, Wednesday, 25 January 2017 14:48 (seven years ago) link

b) mal is plenty unpopular and useless anyway

this is what I'm saying

(±\ PLO;;;;;;; Style (sic), Thursday, 26 January 2017 00:23 (seven years ago) link

ah yeah you did

carry on, champ

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 26 January 2017 00:42 (seven years ago) link

talcum murnbull: donald trump is a sensible fellow, carry on chaps

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Monday, 30 January 2017 09:22 (seven years ago) link

talcum mornbill: as prime minister it is not my job to find my own balls, somebody find my balls please

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Monday, 30 January 2017 10:01 (seven years ago) link

after 18 months of ~pointless~ it seems extraordinary for him to front the nation and say "uhhh not my job"

Autumn Almanac, Monday, 30 January 2017 10:22 (seven years ago) link

Talcum attacks Bridge Shanter! For the second day in a row!

Does this meant... Brunch is doing a good job?

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 9 February 2017 10:59 (seven years ago) link

it means trumble has lost his mind and is lashing out. he's not even saying anything of value, just indiscriminately yelling "YOU ARE" at brittle shetland

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 9 February 2017 11:27 (seven years ago) link

yeah you're right about Taman Shud about losing his mind

but don't worry, lots of persons of sound mind on the Coalition frontbench

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C4NA5LeWEAANq_z.jpg

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 9 February 2017 21:03 (seven years ago) link

it's like cruft's but for dickheads

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 9 February 2017 21:25 (seven years ago) link

two weeks pass...

TONE IS COMING BACK

GET EXCITED

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Friday, 24 February 2017 09:53 (seven years ago) link

(unless you work weekends and rely on penalty rates, I would understand that you'd be less than excited by things this week)

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Friday, 24 February 2017 09:54 (seven years ago) link

i love how tone's list of remedies is transparently a giant load of horse shit

Autumn Almanac, Saturday, 25 February 2017 23:02 (seven years ago) link

"we will fix australia by punishing the human rights commission" uh okay

Autumn Almanac, Saturday, 25 February 2017 23:02 (seven years ago) link

superb

Autumn Almanac, Friday, 10 March 2017 07:30 (seven years ago) link

haw

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Friday, 10 March 2017 09:30 (seven years ago) link

never before has there been such a relentless procession of leaks in the news

estela, Friday, 10 March 2017 10:24 (seven years ago) link

lock thread

Autumn Almanac, Friday, 10 March 2017 10:28 (seven years ago) link

openly vilify entire segments of society in a major national newspaper: fine because free speech

use same platform to cry like a fucking baby when criticised: fine because free speech

be happy that he's dead: absolutely not fine stop it at once you lefty communist

Autumn Almanac, Saturday, 11 March 2017 01:44 (seven years ago) link

I have googled bill leak and support his death

El Tomboto, Saturday, 11 March 2017 03:05 (seven years ago) link

australia's already better off without him, but murdoch's the one who really needs to go. the country will transform overnight when that piece of shit dies.

Autumn Almanac, Saturday, 11 March 2017 05:49 (seven years ago) link

omg Estela <3

Stoop Crone (Trayce), Saturday, 11 March 2017 06:08 (seven years ago) link

btw I'd like to think things would change with Murdochs death but nah. it's too ingrained now. Bolt or someone will gloop into the hole he leaves like a ... big ugly toxic gloop.

Stoop Crone (Trayce), Saturday, 11 March 2017 06:10 (seven years ago) link

true but all the cash murdoch keeps throwing at his loss-making propaganda will probably be cauterised by whomever succeeds him, since the majority of news corp seem to be heavily against keeping his shitrags on neverending life support

Autumn Almanac, Saturday, 11 March 2017 06:18 (seven years ago) link

well, yeah, it'll be a sad day for The Australian's reader

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Saturday, 11 March 2017 06:55 (seven years ago) link

he can always read the spectator

Autumn Almanac, Saturday, 11 March 2017 07:03 (seven years ago) link

btw i'm entirely happy to assume it's a "he"

Autumn Almanac, Saturday, 11 March 2017 07:03 (seven years ago) link

I don't think yr rong there. in fact it's prob my dad.

Stoop Crone (Trayce), Saturday, 11 March 2017 07:41 (seven years ago) link

My lifelong leftwing father reads the australian religiously and it is affecting his brain. Every time we talk he now he goes off on whatever the latest Hobbyhorse of the paper is. 18c, safe schools, whatever. It's so depressing.

I hear from this arsehole again, he's going in the river (James Morrison), Saturday, 11 March 2017 11:13 (seven years ago) link

that astonishing wronghead universe in which 18c is critical to ultimate freedom but two men shouldn't marry because ~~~~~~~~reasons~~~~~~~~

Autumn Almanac, Saturday, 11 March 2017 11:20 (seven years ago) link

ha! barnett & pauline got fucking slaughtered. currently it's lab 39 against lnp 15.

Autumn Almanac, Saturday, 11 March 2017 13:32 (seven years ago) link

trumble is so fucked

Autumn Almanac, Saturday, 11 March 2017 13:34 (seven years ago) link

bring back onion boy hot takes! get your bring back onion boy takes here! hot off the Murdoch press!

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Saturday, 11 March 2017 14:12 (seven years ago) link

oh christ, like he doesn't do immense damage every time he opens his facial slit and farts words through it

Autumn Almanac, Saturday, 11 March 2017 15:11 (seven years ago) link

enjoying a coopers premium light

Autumn Almanac, Wednesday, 15 March 2017 22:25 (seven years ago) link

i'm voting for clive palmer's tweets next election

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 16 March 2017 11:03 (seven years ago) link

So I may be partially responsible for this

http://mobile.abc.net.au/news/2017-03-16/josh-frydenberg-jay-weatherill-verbal-biff/8359056?pfmredir=sm

American Fear of Pranksterism (Ed), Thursday, 16 March 2017 11:39 (seven years ago) link

that was glorious

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 16 March 2017 12:55 (seven years ago) link

how were you possibly partially responsible?

Autumn Almanac, Thursday, 16 March 2017 12:56 (seven years ago) link

what even is this situation where the federal government and states are trying to outdo one another on energy projects? I'm only confused because in our situation it would be the red side building pipelines and the blue side building wind farms, clear cut, orcs vs elves, etc.

https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2017/mar/16/malcolm-turnbull-says-snowy-hydro-plan-will-outdo-south-australian-battery-storage

SFTGFOP (El Tomboto), Thursday, 16 March 2017 16:53 (seven years ago) link

So I may be partially responsible for this

thank u for giving the SA Premier his nads then

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 16 March 2017 21:09 (seven years ago) link

what even is this situation where the federal government and states are trying to outdo one another on energy projects? I'm only confused because in our situation it would be the red side building pipelines and the blue side building wind farms, clear cut, orcs vs elves, etc.

yeh but the red side will come out in 6 months time and say it's not feasible and then advise again that 'coal is good for humanity'

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 16 March 2017 21:11 (seven years ago) link

(noting that the red side here is the blue side, of course, if anyone is confused)

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 16 March 2017 21:12 (seven years ago) link

anyway here's the guy that some people claim might be our next prime minister after Talcum gets rolled: https://www.buzzfeed.com/lanesainty/its-all-same-sex-marriages-fault?utm_term=.gmbmerB7N#.iiYJXVp9P

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 16 March 2017 21:21 (seven years ago) link

If Dutton becomes PM I am declaring my self a freeman of the land and signing up for a one way trip to mars with space X.

American Fear of Pranksterism (Ed), Thursday, 16 March 2017 21:42 (seven years ago) link

anyway here's the guy that some people claim might be our next prime minister after Talcum gets rolled: https://www.buzzfeed.com/lanesainty/its-all-same-sex-marriages-fault?utm_term=.gmbmerB7N#.iiYJXVp9P

― Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Friday, 17 March 2017 08:21 (three hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hoo boy

Autumn Almanac, Friday, 17 March 2017 01:13 (seven years ago) link

Peter Dutton has hit out at pro-marriage equality companies for shoving their “politically correct views down our throats”

i object more to people shoving their potatoes down our throats but okay

Autumn Almanac, Friday, 17 March 2017 01:14 (seven years ago) link

magnificent

Autumn Almanac, Friday, 17 March 2017 02:48 (seven years ago) link

For anyone interested this is what the event was actually about.

http://reneweconomy.com.au/agl-goes-live-with-virtual-power-plant-linking-household-battery-storage-16810/

American Fear of Pranksterism (Ed), Friday, 17 March 2017 07:25 (seven years ago) link

good that you got exposure, probably not the kind you wanted though

Autumn Almanac, Friday, 17 March 2017 12:11 (seven years ago) link

Yeah, there was a great interview on abc local radio in Adelaide Witt the guy whose garage it was.

Anyway normal service is resumed Bob Katter wants to preserve Australians' god given to wade in tropical creeks unmolested by homosexual Muslim crocodiles.

https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2017/mar/20/katters-australia-party-push-to-legalise-crocodile-hunting-after-queensland-attacks

American Fear of Pranksterism (Ed), Monday, 20 March 2017 08:27 (seven years ago) link

knob batter

Johnny Cage - 4'33" Fatality (King Boy Pato), Monday, 20 March 2017 09:56 (seven years ago) link

when the country collapses under the weight of its own personal debt crisis, stuff like that will be a hilarious account of how complacent and fucking stupid we were in the lead up

fucking pop records (Autumn Almanac), Monday, 20 March 2017 11:21 (seven years ago) link

can't wait to be more racist

fucking pop records (Autumn Almanac), Tuesday, 21 March 2017 03:13 (seven years ago) link

and here's two white guys to explain why we should be allowed to be more racist

and here's a white guy from the party to do some press

and here's the white guy who got done for being a monstrous lying fucking bigot falling victim to a cruel law that gives innocent people respite from having to deal with racial attacks all fucking day restricts his freedom of speech

and here are some examples of 18c cases that went literally nowhere robbed white supremacists victims of the right to be racially charged aggressive fucks speak

fucking pop records (Autumn Almanac), Tuesday, 21 March 2017 11:50 (seven years ago) link

there are too many days when i really fucking hate this country

fucking pop records (Autumn Almanac), Tuesday, 21 March 2017 11:51 (seven years ago) link

i mean white malcolm turnbull announced it alongside white george "people have the right to be bigots y'know" brandis, what the galloping fuck were they thinking

fucking pop records (Autumn Almanac), Tuesday, 21 March 2017 12:03 (seven years ago) link

at last we can do all the racist things we already did, but with even more permission

fucking pop records (Autumn Almanac), Tuesday, 21 March 2017 13:05 (seven years ago) link


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