Alexander Isak will be on Homes Under The Hammer - Premier League 2025/2026

Decided to bite the bullet. Haven't started a thread in many years.

Will Arsenal finally win the league? Will Liverpool be worse despite spending 200m? Will Man City get relegated due to 115 charges or grimly return to form? Will Man United stop being funny? Can even one promoted team stay up? How angry can Newcastle fans get?

Have at it!

Something about Spurs. Setpieces/violent roughhousing?

Finally, on the right board

Hooray! Looking forward to watching MOTD with the boy and not otherwise engaging unless Liverpool win something and there's another parade.

Oh and beating that cunt from Mumford & Sons at FPL again. Is there an ILX FPL league out there?

You won't watch it live? I have to say through a combo of getting older, TV subscriptions, Liverpool being fairly consistently good, and general ennui of life, I am prob deeper in than ever. Several podcasts a week, BT and Sky at home etc. Maybe also Liverpool finally winning the league then repeating it means football doesn't have the grinding painful anxiety it had every season when I was younger. I can enjoy it more.

i look forward to another season of grinding painful anxiety

Tbh after I posted that I started thinking how anxious I was even when we were miles ahead last year.

I dunno, it's so hard to find a stream these days and I just have so much to do every Saturday anyway. Might be changing jobs soon though so maybe things will change a bit. It's something to talk about at family gatherings, though the family still in Liverpool either support Everton or Forest (long story)

All three promoted teams to go straight back down for, I think, the third season in a row?

Have seen a couple of pundits tip Leeds to buck the trend at the expense of Wolves

A couple of evil pundits.

Sunderland have spent loads also

West Ham not great?

West Ham will be fine I reckon. Brentford seem the best candidates to keep one of the new teams up but I doubt it tbh. I reckon City will win it. My football consumption (other than League 1) is just Second Captains and 3min highlights on YouTube

Brentford hiring Keith Andrews with zero management experience is a brave move (though to be fair he does have some assistant manager experience, though to be even fairer it was for MK Dons and they were relegated that season)

Definitely a worry. He is red hot favourite to be sacked first.

I wish Keith well obviously as long as he finishes below us

Bournemouth have decided to set the fifa setting to ultimate for iriola and he's clearly done a great job but I think they'll struggle , same with forest. not enough to go down tho probably.

in amongst all the money lfc are throwing around I hope I've missed them extending konate's contract or are they going to let him leave for nothing next summer?
if lfc don't win tmrw then the winless in the league streak stretches to what 5 games?
slot out in that case.

I think city will be closer to last season version than 2019-2024 version.
think arsenal will win the league.

Sounds like Konate could be off. There were even a few rumours Real might try to buy him this summer.

I think they need to keep him if at all possible. the way the team sets up this season him and vvd will have to do a tonne of one on one defending and I trust both of them to manage that, not sure anyone we've been linked with could cope as well. of course it helps to have allisson mind you.

I know it's twenty mins in but feel like there's not a lot of attacking coherence in Liverpool at all.

Good game this.

Liverpool all over the place defensively

Never in doubt (that Mo would score in the opening game).

What a game. Unbelievably sad to see Mo crying at the final whistle as the whole stadium sings for Jota.

I think Liverpool's problem is midfield exposing the defence. Wirtz is quality but isn't going to do anything besides attack. Szobo at 8 is too undisciplined, and Gravy is suspended. That said, Konate was terrible tonight.

Ekitike looks brilliant tho, exciting player. Wirtz still settling but love how his first touch is almost always a pass.

Could be a mental season with this attacking setup but I hope they find a more controlled structure for the sake of my health.

indisciplined*

For three seasons we’ve had more points than any other team in this league, which is incredible. That’s how you have all the consistency. Now we have to do it in a season to have one more point or the same amount of points and more goals different than any other team. That’s the objective.”

apparently this isn't even true, man city have more, but also... this is why people dislike arteta. he makes it sound like they need to just flukily be top of the league when the season ends having done the harder bit of having a good average points score.

not sure whether to watch this

looks like Martinez is suspended for Villa, wonder what happened there?

Sent off at end of last season

[lightly quivering] not ringing any bells

Yeah i detected the note of fake insouciance

Not notably missing Martinez so far

new guy looks good so far. he's had more to do than I'd like

Well yeah, he's done good tho

Every pass is going wrong, this is getting tiresome. That said, the tempo is pretty crazy. Newcastle’s midfield get in there so fast

New goalie looks legit, this could be a big step up from Olsen

Weird seeing both teams in the same colour shorts. What is this, Ted Lasso?

Think Villa had a bit more impact in the last 5 minutes, hopefully they build on that

Welp, the Prem's back baby

newcastle could really use a prolific striker, you feel.

Classy celebrating like they've just won the league tho

not sure there are many groups of fans who will relish hating one of their own players as much as newcastle fans will with isak.

if there's one thing Newcastle fans can't stand, it's Jamal Kashoggi's widow. But if there are two things they can't stand, you can add A Player That Doesnt Give His All For That Famous Black and White Shirt as well

alan shearer - got newcastle relegated

alexander isak - won a trophy for newcastle for the first and last time in their history

yet the latter is the villain here???

only one goal in the prem so far today and it's richarlison

Richarlison’s second goal was tremendous.

Forget yer Arsenal v. Spurs or Chelsea v. Fulham or whatever, Newcastle v Sunderland games are going to give the Premier League a taste of a truly venomous derby.

Grant Xhaka as Sunderland captain should def help with that

so wolves are going to beat man city 4-0 then

https://i.postimg.cc/B6dXNmZS/Screenshot-20250816-165109.jpg

I'm enjoying this brief moment of respite trying to work out e.g. if West Ham are shit or not

before I end up crying into this thread in a bit

Wolves playing p well so far

Well yeah buf

It’s completely bizarre. £100m quoted for Tonali too.

I suppose City did pay pretty close to the same for Grealish, adjusted for inflation.

our fans will melt down when Morgz doesn't go for anywhere near that

Ugarte's done his ACL and could be out for 9 months apparently, which means United won't be selling him anytime soon

Mateus Fernandes to Spurs for £85m seems like a done deal.

guess united don't need him now ugarte is staying

Apparently Utd offered 70m+15m while Spurs are paying 85m with no add-ons and wages of £250,000 a week

He's obviously talented but that's mad fucking money

It seems central midfielders with a couple of decent seasons under their belt are now one of the most valuable commodities on the planet

Utd currently only have two senior midfielders though (pending arrival of Ederson) so that's slightly terrifying

Looks like Spurs are going to get Tonali for £100m too. £240m down. You’d imagine they’d need to spend at least another £100m - £150m up front if they’re not going to end up starting Richarlison next season.

Pretty impressive stuff tho with a good manager at the helm.

hm

these seem like average players to me tbh

Let's not forget Elliot Anderson is like the third most expensive midfielder of all time... or sumthin'.

Didn't Utd get actually good Ederson for like 40m this summer?

Subject to a medical after the World Cup, but yeah seems done.

Fernandes is 21 and should maintain a pretty good resale value as long as he doesn’t succumb to the Spurs curse. Tonali, I think there’s probably a substantial premium being applied to the idea that he has an attitude / mentality that they’ve been missing in midfield. They’re definitely overpaying but I guess they want to get business done quickly.

Get Savinho, Summerville and maybe Santi Giménez (the latter on the cheap) and clear out a lot of the dead wood and I could see a decent season, with no European distractions.

Still a lot of work to do, though.

Tonali has looked great generally imo when I've watched them.

I don't know who Santi Gimenez is but the rest seem like a sensible signings. Spurs should go back to midtable, but we can all hope they continue to Spurs it up.

Tonali passes the eye test but he's a bit of a jack of all trades, master of none and Newcastle fans don't seem particularly fussed about losing him

I'm surprised teams aren't throwing money at them for Guimares but he is on the older side

I get "slightly better Ugarte" vibes off Ederson but I hope I'm wrong

For all the euphoria when the Saudis bought, their model isn't hugely different to Mike Ashley, apart from the big cash injection at the beginning. The whole thing seems completely stalled at the moment.

Chelsea got rid of Ranieri, Man City got rid of Pellegrini, nearly five years in and Newcastle still have Eddie Howe. Just does not indicate any great ambition to win the prem.

have to clear out yesterday's dead wood in order to get in tomorrow's

coming to terms with your team's mediocrity

at best

Pereira out, Glasner in - https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/articles/cy8dgze1n8go

they missed out on Gary O'Neil

gon baby gon

This keeper!

Wrong thread lol

Forest will either be European contenders again or Glasner will fall out with the owner and get sealed inside a drum and be thrown into the sea by Christmas

🚨 EXCLUSIVE: Tottenham Hotspur reach agreement with Newcastle United to sign Sandro Tonali. Deal for 26yo Italy international to join #THFC from #NUFC £92.5m + £7.5m in potential add-ons based around multiple Champions League qualifications @TheAthleticFC https://t.co/dWEZtjFzFK

— David Ornstein (@David_Ornstein) July 1, 2026

Vuskovic to Brighton for the best part of £50m and 20% of sell-on value. Shame we never got to see him at Spurs but seems like decent value.

similar to the marcus edwards structure in that we get an opportunity to match any offer also in future

i wonder if there is a vital characteristic for epl defending that they just dont think he has

and why that same level of discernment doesnt seem to apply to any of the cunts we have given games to in recent years

Manzambi to Villa 🫡
Tielemans to Utd 🤢

Utd throwing darts at a wall of midfielders

I heard Ederson was off and they were also in for some Chelsea second string guy?

Sir Jim sold his guitars and bought turntables
Sir Jim sold his turntables and bought guitars
I'm losing my edge, £50m for any Brazilian midfielder

I was there in 2023 when Andrey Santos made two appearances on loan for Nottingham Forest

Trossard to Besiktas seems like a strange one, but I didn't realise he's already 32 because he looks like Owen Jones' 12 year old brother, and I guess Arsenal will have incomings in that position soon

after a very fallow period for Joaos, Villa seem to be about to sign Joaos Gomes and Palhinha; the former feels like a pretty big coup and the latter seems an overpriced loan, but anything to stop him killing our midfielders may be worth it

Richarlison being linked to Juventus and Inter apparently being unable to meet the asking prices for Curtis Jones and Trevor Chalobah is a pretty good indication of where the respective leagues are. Probably close to the point where the likes of Santos and Bergvall can only move between EPL clubs because nobody outside of KSA (and PSG, etc) is in the market for a £50m midfielder.

I see [former Manchester Utd striker who will not be named] has fucked off to Fenerbahce also

Looks like he fell out with everyone at Marseille

I'm gonna miss Joao but he never deserved to be shackled to our Champo season. Price seems on the low side tbh but hey

I reckon Villa probably just backed up the truck containing the less-than-ideal £35 million they just got for Tielemans and unloaded it all on Wolves' driveway with no complicated payment structure

I think prices have to take into account whether players want to leave and do they deserve to be forced to stay so I'm not criticising anybody for the deal tbh

It'll be interesting to see how he does in a less donkey-centric environment

Trossard seemed to struggling in the second half of the season and only had one year left on his contract. Talk of his replacement veers wildly depending on what you read from big names like Barcola to some Greek lad playing in Belgium.

There is also ridiculous numbers being floated around about Julian Alvarez but it seems strange to replace a 20 goal a season striker we just spent £60m on with spending 9 figures on a 15 goal a season more all rounder who doesn’t want to leave Spain. I suspect it is an agent really earning his bonus.

I am more intrigued to see what happens at other clubs tbh. Let the new manager intrigue begin.

yeah there's a lot of intrigue there, excited to see a lot of teams' first few games

there have been a lot of extremely promising managerial appointments and at least one of them quite simply must shit the bed catastrophically

Ah I'm sure GON will be fine for a fortnight

Looks like Rogers to Chelsea for £117m.

God damn