Classic or dud: pissing on your belt

archers of durchlauf

WOW

can I just... wow

quimwow

can't wait till I go to class tomorrow and explain what I was doing instead of the reading.

omg @ all of u

yeah i'm supposed to be working, i can't be farting around in this thread all day

i mean shit i have an exam tomorrow

(xxxpost) the prof is unlikely to accept your watered down excuse...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QwRISkyV_B8

you might say...that shit got shelved

another day down the crapper

Perhaps tomorrow you can make a U turn and be flushed with success.

Um, my father and I discovered the Japanese toilets with the "heated car wash" option on trip to Asia a few years ago. He has one in his remodel, and I've added the electrical outlet for one of my own, someday. I feel as though I've been a filthy savage for most of my life.

WASHLET

great now I have Del's "Pissin' on Your Steps Belt" on loop in my head

uh derelict please elaborate???????

I thought the shit shelf was designed to allow Germans to inspect their shit specifically because of the amount and variety of pork (and raw pork, can that be right?) they ate. This made them particularly susceptible to tapeworms, which gave them a special reason to want to inspect their shit.

ew ew ew, suddenly this thread isn't awesome anymore

piles of shit on a shelf is okay but piles of wormy shit is a step beyond the pale?

AGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGH

nope, still funny

IMAGE POST

this thread has gone to shit

this thread is a shitshow

As a 1/2 German American, I can attest to the compulsion to marvel at my feces.

classic because then wolves will no the belt is yrs and not to borrow it

again, holy lolz

this thread is such a treasure, i want to print it out, put it on a shelf and inspect it

Can I just slightly derail to note that sometimes in English it is deemed useful to add "own" to make "your own" and sometimes it isn't? Compare this thread with the R.I.P. Boyzone singer one: Pissing on your belt / Choking on your own vomit. Nobody blinks at that "your own vomit" but what if this thread had been called "Pissing on your own belt" ?

English is weird sometimes.

Thank you, carry on! :-)

this changes the meaning of a girl having a shelf forever.

the thing is Stan, pissing on someone else's belt is unambiguously classic

And choking on someone else's vomit? :-/

unambiguously dud

I have nothing to add at this point, but I feel like it would be a crime if I didn't post on this thread

GBX, for about $700-800, you can purchase a toilet seat (Toto Washlet) that will fit atop your standard western toilet that draws water from the tank, heats it electrically while you are seated, will spray said warm water either from the front or rear. The spray can be adjusted for pressure, temperature, oscillation, and positioning fore and aft using a wireless control pad at eye level. There is also a warmed air drier.

By inventing this, I think the East has bypassed a lot of slow cultural evolution, much as some developing nations have simply bypassed wired telecommunications. We cannot allow our nation to fall behind in toilet technology. Cue Also Sprach Zarathustra.

http://www.chinasmack.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/squat-vs-sitting-toilet.jpg

(xpost) You were risking court marshall!

geez i turn off my internet for one hour to finish a paper and LOOK what happens, shit everywhere

when I think "heated car wash", I think of this:

http://www.badgerlandcarwashequipment.com/images/topBrush.jpg

and that + my scrotum = not a good time

they have sex toys like that...smaller scale of course

I was lucky enough to be present at an example of someone choking on somebody else's vomit. New Year's Eve in the pub, a friend of mine had drunk excessively, to the degree that when he suddenly realised he was going to be sick it was too late, and all he could do was jam his hand up to his mouth in an attempt to stop it going everywhere.

The rather remarkable an extremely memorable effect of this was, because of the pressure of vomit building up, to send violent jets of vomity liquid shooting out at various angles from behind my friend's hand.

He was sitting down at the time, and to the side of him, standing up, was the local wide boy, volubly telling a humorous tale of some sort.

One the jets of vomit shot into his open mouth. He stopped quite quickly and started saying 'Ugh, what was that?' a question he never finished because it had become clear what it was, as my friend was now vomiting all over his hand.

The sounds that the chap made were quite remarkable. Gagging and shouting at the same time, uncertain of whether to drink or spit. It was, to everyone bar the two main participants, incredibly funny.

Next to each other? Is that for couples? How romantic!

not to spoil the fun, but can i just say i have been living in germany for nearly a month and have not seen a single shit inspection shelf toilet. how often did you actually see them dan?

the family I was living with had one, so every day!

(mind you this was 1991, things may well be different now)

holy balls I'm old

http://www.totousa.com/Default.aspx?tabid=272

"As practically every German is health-insured, we tend to go to the doctor (as recommended) at least every two years for a throrough (and practcally cost-free) check-up. For that, you will have to bring some of your, er, feces in a specialized container the doctor will give you. So how do you get at your, er, sausage if it is swimming in water? With a German toilet, this is dead easy."

Oh boy. This Friday is not going to be fun.

okay so at the point in that video when she sat down I got very, very scared

"do what you came to do, then reach for the remote"