Realest Of Football, Realest Of Talk: Football League, Blue Square & Beyond, 2009/10

Middlesbrough sack boss Southgate

Wow, didn't expect that, especially as they're only a point behind the leaders.

I feel a bit sorry for him, I've always liked him for some reason - think cos he seems calm and reasonable, plus he looks a little bit silly, and I'd always assumed that team would come good given the time. Might be completely wrong tho.

Apparently rumours of Hope Powell becoming the next Grimsby manager, would be a huge story

Strachan In (?)

same as suedey, tbh, i like southgate, although i'm not sure he's a football manager. assistant job for him at a premier league club?

I'd have him.

Something is really rotten at Grimsby Town F.C. and I'm not sure any manager's gonna be able to turn it around on their own.

Unexpected benefits of League One - coming back to 1-0 down to gub the Franchise 3-1 is fuckin' sweet.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1222134/Pictured-The-moment-fuming-football-captain-launched-astonishing-attack-fan.html

fing abaaht lower league, raaht, is the interaction between the players and the fans, raaaht?

http://dl.getdropbox.com/u/818963/brawl.jpg

What accent are you doing there?

weasel, from the wind in the willaaaahs

looking fwd to this qpr match more than i have any premier league match that didn't involve spurs in quite some tme. kinda fuck the premiership lately imo.

oh shit a taarabt

who should probably be playing for spurs, now that we have palacios to put behind him and threaten him.

Newcastle United have announced their stadium will be known as the sportsdirect.com @ St James' Park Stadium for the immediate future.

oh man, that is heartbreaking

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/hampshire/8342992.stm

shall we just talk about Portsmouth in this thread from now on for practicality's sake?

If the Sunderland board have got anything about them they'll put in a bid for the St James' Park sponsorship rights tomorrow.

The Newcastle stadium thing is simultaneously really funny and really depressing.

just funny imo.

You won't be laughing when Arsenal's stadium gets named after some sponsor or other.

no, i think that would make me cry.

The Doves Farm Organic Wholemeal Bread Stadium

The best bit is that Ashley said he was putting the rights up for sale... and now he's given them to his company. Newcastle United are now in a situation where their chairman has renamed their stadium in an attempt to get one over on the chairman of Wigan Athletic.

cmon ipswich, let's get the last minute winner this time rather than giving it away.

and where are the non-prem ilxors on a saturday?

You won't be laughing when Arsenal's stadium gets named after some sponsor or other.

i'm sure andrex could find a good in somewhere.

Good a bye younger Fergie.

for all those spouting off about southgate's totally inevitable sacking at boro - peterborough's is what an actual crazy decision looks like.

props to gordon strachan btw, keep up the good lolwork.

what the actual fuck @ peterborough

i guess that's just what you get for selling us back super tommy 'didnt fecking square it in the 2003 play off final v cardiff which is now sure to repeat itself' williams.

Gus Poyet announced as Brighton and Hove Albion's new manager, hmm.

Living off his coaching success at Spurs and Leeds.

good luck to Gus

darraghmac in charge of a football club, i don't think there's any real surprise here.

"'Dear Players of Grimsby Town FC

'I am writing with regard to my absolute astonishment and disbelief as to the sheer magnitude of your complete lack of talent and failure to carry out the job for which you are paid to do. I am not aware of any swear word or other derogatory phrase in my current vocabulary which comes close to a description of your 'performance' (and I use that term loosely) this afternoon, but let me just say that you have collectively reached a level of inadequacy and ineptitude that neither I nor modern science had previously considered possible.

'In fact I recall a time, in my youth, when I decided to call in sick at work and instead spent the entire day in my one bedroom flat wearing nothing but my underpants, eating toast and w***ing furiously over second-rate Scandinavian porn. Yet somehow, I still managed to contribute more to my employer in that one Andrex-filled day than you complete bunch of toss-baskets have contributed to this club in your entire time here.

'I would genuinely like to know how you pathetic little p***flaps sleep at night, knowing full well that you have taken my money and that of several thousand others and delivered precisely f**k all in return. I run a business myself, and I believe I could take any 4,000 of my customers at random; burn down their houses, impregnate their wives and then dismember their children before systematically sending them back in the post, limb-by-limb, and still ensure a level of customer satisfaction which exceeds that which I have experienced at Blundell Park at any time so far this season.

'You are a total disgrace, not only to your profession, not only to the human race, but to nature itself. This may sound like an exaggeration, but believe me when I say that I have passed kidney stones which have brought me a greater level of pleasure and entertainment than watching each of you worthless excuses for professional footballers attempt to play a game you are clearly incapable of playing, week-in, week-out.

'I considered, for a second, that I was perhaps being a little too harsh. But then I recalled that I have blindly given you all the benefit of the doubt for too long now. Yes, for too long you have failed to earn the air you've been breathing by offering any kind of tangible quality either as footballers or as people in general. As such, I feel it's only fair that your supply runs out forthwith.

'I trust, at this precise moment in time, that Mr Fenty is in his office tapping away on the Easyjet web site booking you all one-way flights to Zurich, complete with an overnight stay with our cheese eating friends at Dignitas. Don't bother packing your toothbrush - you won't need it.

'In the event that our beloved chairman can't afford the expense (understandable given that he's soon going to have to assemble a new squad from scratch), then I am prepared to sell my family (including my unborn child) to a dubious consortium of Middle Eastern businessmen in order to pay for the flights. Christ, I'll drive you there myself, one-by one, without sleep, if I have to.

'Failing that, understanding that most dubious Middle Eastern businessmen are tied-up purchasing Premier League football clubs, I ask you to please take matters into your hands. Use your imagination, guys - strangle yourselves or cover yourself in tinfoil and take a fork to a nearby plug socket, or something. Just put yourselves and us fans out of our collective misery.

'So, in summary, you pack of repugnant, sputum-filled, invertebrate b***ards; leave this club now and don't you f**king dare look back. You've consistently demonstrated less passion and desire than can commonly be found within the contents of a sloth's scrótum, so frankly you can just all f**k off - don't pass go, don't collect your wages, don't ever come back to this town again.

'I look forward to you serving me at my local McDonald's drive-thru in the near future.

'Yours sincerely
A very disillusioned Mariner'"

just coming here to post that :)

http://thefishy.co.uk/cgi-bin/forum/Blah.pl?m-1257631840/s-0/

Peterborough saga gets a bit odder - Fergie Jr's replacement is apparently set to be Kettering gaffer Terry Cooper. Which doesn't suggest a club looking for a quick fix, since he's completely inexperienced at this level. Kettering have done well under his stewardship, but we're hardly talking Nigel Clough levels of achievement.

Still - Exodus Geohaghan for the Championship, anyone?

Whaat? Mark Cooper has been tootling around a few jobs in the upper end of non-league for a bit, trees have generally not been in fear of being pulled up in his presence.

If they'd appointed his dad as you suggest that would have been a different matter...

Gus Poyet's assistant at Brighton - Mauricio Taricco!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LsLO2KVv0Mo&feature=related

At the 1'07 mark, classic material.

Mauricio fucking Taricco.

^^lol yes

Can I just? WOOOOOOOO. Thanks.

Not sure if it belongs on this thread, but seeing as football doesn't get any realer than this... I mentioned a while back about how I'd thought youngsters were being trained properly these days, only to be put right by seeing some actual kids' action. More of this going on as I made my way home tonight in atrocious conditions. Actual coaching of a sort too, with shouted instructions like "Try something different, Ryan" and "Don't let this mob settle".

Anyway, as well as savouring everyone lining up in the middle for a corner kick which bounces before it reaches the 18-yard box, I was tickled enough to get a couple of snaps of the loneliest kid in the world:
http://img134.imageshack.us/img134/3968/theloneliestkidinthewor.jpg

If the wind weren't in his direction, he would have had no involvement in the game whatsoever. The camera hasn't picked it up, but it's absolutely tipping it down too - 45° right-to-left in the second shot.

Still - Exodus Geohaghan for the Championship, anyone?

― William Bloody Swygart, Friday, 13 November 2009 22:04 (1 week ago)

BOOM GOES THE DYNAMITE

OH SHIT

probably the greatest part of finally meeting Swygart last weekend was attempting to pronounce Exodus' full name and being corrected by the master with scarce a beat missed

Disappointed they didn't work 'Player Exodus' into the headline.

is his name not just pronounced like "gay-gun" or what

There's an England C team?!

yeah, an amateur-only team. or semi-pro. something like that.