Has ILE become too pally?

But threads that are nothing but interesting deep discussions are just as dull as those that are just banter. (Neither are as dull as the ILM list threads, though.) Give me some ebb and flow and I am happy.

I found the in-jokes and special ILX lingo slightly daunting to begin with, but I just lurked for a week or so to get the gist of it all before diving in. And I'm very glad I did :)

I don't think it's the palliness that people object to, but rather the endless allusions to things that happen offboard at meetups, FAPs, etc. - this makes you feel very left out and out of the loop and unpopular if you weren't at said events.

Or maybe that's just me.

x-post: this is getting too pally now. I will go away for a while ;)

ILM is easier for me when I don't feel like revealing too much of myself or getting into things too deep because there is a focus, and a topic to remind me not to get too personal. (Not that this works, but relatively, it seems to work.)

(unless you're talking about someone besides me, then I hate you)

Aw, you know it's you ... No, wait, alt.fan.geri-halliwell? I don't even know you.

As for the FAP's and such, I'm obviously unable to attend them since I don't live in the UK or the US (or New Zealand or Australia). But that's okay; I don't come here to chat with friends I'd meet anyhow outside the InterWeb. I come here because you folks are genuinely fun to talk with, and even though your threads sometime are dull and injokey and cliquesque, more often they are funny and intelligent and a pleasure to participate in. If that wouldn't be the case, you wouldn't see me here.

[SOPPY MUSIC]

[CURTAIN]

I wonder if the thread's author should have a moral right to be able to say "um, can we get back on topic please" when things start to disintegrate? Just a thought out loud, not a suggestion.

Of course they should. And people do, I'm pretty sure.

I've never met another Ilxor, haven't been on AIM in months, and that never bothers me.

Like I said upthread: someone, somewhere, is always bitching about ILX. Either it's too pally/in-jokey/chat-roomy/twee/nice/cliquish, or it's too hostile/unsafe/argumentative/overrun-by-new-people. You can't have it both ways. You can't fix both problems. All you can do, apparently, is keep swinging back and forth between the two. The complaining is probably part of the cycle, which means we're about to be overrun with personal attacks, stalkerish behavior, and a few people leaving the boards or threatening to -- or maybe we have, cause I'm not caught up yet.

Josh, if the reason you left Usenet was because it became too pally, I have to wonder at how you're defining the word "pally".

Yeah you can, in theory. It doesn't have to be either of things. In practice, maybe you're right that those are the two traps it can fall into.

i read and post on the "earnest" threads bcz the chances of finding somewhere else in the world where i get my ideas this stretched or challenged = v.slim indeed

My take on it is that the serious threads are often less about exchanging ideas and much more about scoring points off of each other in a genteel, academic manner and if I'm going to be involved in a point-scoring contest, it's much more entertaining to me to involve dick jokes.

Conversely, I really like the way people are treated when they post personal problems to the board. The outpouring of well wishes and sympathy usually staggers me, even given that many of us have met each other.