<3 <3 <3
― horseshoe, Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:11 (fourteen years ago) link
yeah I was gonna say: what bothers me the most itt is that laurel feels the need to have to defend her rxn.
― crazy farting throwback jersey (gbx), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:12 (fourteen years ago) link
yeah and that passing spacecadet said she didn't like how people were all like "get over it" and guess what she got
― harbl, Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:13 (fourteen years ago) link
i just want to say, Laurel, apart from the race stuff, i think you are routinely brave and awesome in these threads and i thank you!
― horseshoe, Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:13 (fourteen years ago) link
I don't think it's that the men who do this are few and far between; it's that the men who do this CONSTANTLY NON-STOP AT ALL TIMES REGARDLESS OF SITUATION AND BOUNDARIES are few and far between.
This is the opposite of what this thread is saying, a lot of guys on here are saying, that's normal, all men think like that all the time, get used to it because it's not up to you. Now you want to have that both ways?
― WHY DON'T YOU JUST LICK THE BUS DIRECTLY (Laurel), Wednesday, December 2, 2009 12:00 PM (7 minutes ago)
for the billionth time, you're not distinguishing 'thinking' and 'acting'. i have the right to objectify anyone i like; the onus is on me to react to these feelings in an appropriate manner in a working or social environment, or suffer the legal/disciplinary or social consequences (respectively)
― brutt fartve (k3vin k.), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:14 (fourteen years ago) link
Of course it's not wrong. If it upsets you, it upsets you! I'm just still a little unclear to what exactly it is that ppl find upsetting. Is it the fact sometimes people say wildly inappropriate things based on a woman's appearance? That's what I thought this was initially about. However, it seems to have become about men making judgements about women based around whether or not they find them sexually attractive. If it's the later then I really don't understand why this is upsetting. Of course men do this. We all do this on some level whether we realize it or not.
― bear say hi to me (ENBB), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:16 (fourteen years ago) link
i've known enough crepey dudes in my life that laurel's rxn is justified
― it's like 10,000 goons when all you need is a trife (m bison), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:16 (fourteen years ago) link
kevin the component of this that you are missing is exactly the thing that a passing spacecadet articulated that you then blew off as "overthinking"
― max, Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:16 (fourteen years ago) link
I think there are two entirely distinct ways of interpreting the phrase "everyone does this offensive behavior nonstop". One is that, at any given point in time, someone is exhibiting the behavior described. The other is that everyone is exhibiting this behavior at all times. It is certainly understandable to be creeped out when you are talking about scenario B and someone else is talking about scenario A.
― Huckabee Jesus lifeline (HI DERE), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:17 (fourteen years ago) link
yeah kev you are sort of missing the point imo?
― crazy farting throwback jersey (gbx), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:18 (fourteen years ago) link
srs: breifly describe the "point"
― brutt fartve (k3vin k.), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:18 (fourteen years ago) link
If he is missing the point than I am too. Sorry but it's just not clear. There is a huge distinction between thinking and acting that needs to be made but hasn't.
― bear say hi to me (ENBB), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:19 (fourteen years ago) link
the social interaction part of this b/n the two guys is massively uncomfortable imo. its like the guy is telling you he has a boner
― bnw, Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:19 (fourteen years ago) link
lol!
― harbl, Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:21 (fourteen years ago) link
It's like he's leading into inviting you over to his house to watch videos.
― kingkongvsgodzilla, Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:21 (fourteen years ago) link
lol bnw otm
― curtest hipness (Curt1s Stephens), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:22 (fourteen years ago) link
kev I guess what I perceive u missing is what spacecadet laid out: even tho u and lots of ppl routinely "objectify" or w/e attractive ppl in the street, it is still perfectly acceptable and rational to find that fact upsetting
― crazy farting throwback jersey (gbx), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:23 (fourteen years ago) link
i think laurel is totally reasonable and otm itt
― goole, Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:24 (fourteen years ago) link
Except for the predilection towards writing "nigger" for no reason, you mean.
― Huckabee Jesus lifeline (HI DERE), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:25 (fourteen years ago) link
ok if i havent made this clear, i don't disagree with that (3rica has said the same thing). i just don't think that's what we've spent 500 posts arguing about!
xp gbx
― brutt fartve (k3vin k.), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:26 (fourteen years ago) link
when I worked at a library the dudes who used to come in and watch porn always brought two liter bottles of sprite in with them for some reason
― super sexy psycho fantasy world (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:26 (fourteen years ago) link
You ran a porn library?
― Mark G, Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:28 (fourteen years ago) link
― crazy farting throwback jersey (gbx), Wednesday, December 2, 2009 12:23 PM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
GBX - please clarify whether you are talking about people doing this and voicing it outloud or just doing this internally.
― bear say hi to me (ENBB), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:28 (fourteen years ago) link
nah I worked in the basement of a university library, on my training day the dude showing me around was like "uh people come in here and watch porn, call the cops if its child porn"
― super sexy psycho fantasy world (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:29 (fourteen years ago) link
Were the bottles empty?
― Nuyorican oatmeal (jaymc), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:29 (fourteen years ago) link
okie dokie, i think you're in for a lifelong uphill battle if you're going to be constantly worried about who's looking at you and who's thinking what, but i understand you on a basic level
xps
― brutt fartve (k3vin k.), Wednesday, December 2, 2009 10:20 AM (2 hours ago)
^^this is what i said earlier, how we've still been discussing this for 2 hours is anyone's guess
― brutt fartve (k3vin k.), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:29 (fourteen years ago) link
hammering on the but it's just thoughts aspect is unproductive, if only because everyone gets so defensive! ppl that check ppl out don't want to be lumped in with the creeps, and ppl that are uncomfortable with that kind of behavior don't want to be lumped in with hysterical prudes (I am guessing). xps on ZING
― crazy farting throwback jersey (gbx), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:30 (fourteen years ago) link
the bottles were full
― super sexy psycho fantasy world (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:30 (fourteen years ago) link
one day a dude had a root beer bottle
bnw killin' it in this thread
― all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:31 (fourteen years ago) link
btw it strikes me as fundamentally unfair that this thread is happening while Tuomas is tied up with the 80s album poll
― all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:32 (fourteen years ago) link
I guess social networking blew up their spot though because people at the school just started posting their pictures up online with the words LIBRARY MASTURBATOR and shit
― super sexy psycho fantasy world (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:32 (fourteen years ago) link
I stopped showing up to that job at some point
mostly i think my saying that there's nothing wrong with lusting someone has been confused for finding illegitimate the negative reactions of those who do
― brutt fartve (k3vin k.), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:34 (fourteen years ago) link
if desire begets speech then can one speak on desire
― super sexy psycho fantasy world (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:35 (fourteen years ago) link
OK. Since nobody is answering the question and it has definitely not been clear throughout this thread . . . here's how I see it:
GENERALLY GROSS AND NOT OK AND PERFECTLY RATIONAL TO BE UPSET BY = Men making unwelcome advances or lewd comments to random strangers or women in pretty much any setting.
TOTALLY OK AND NOT ALL THAT RATIONAL TO BE UPSET BY = The fact that all people regardless of gender make judgements and have opions on one another based on our outward appearances which may lead to us thinking sexual thoughts about people we see but do not know. This means that yes someone who sees you walking down the street may think a sexual thougt about you and in their eyes you are nothing but your outter appearance but if you have not had any other interaction with them, of course this is going to be the case. We are animals and sex is a huge part of our world and interaction with one another.
― bear say hi to me (ENBB), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:35 (fourteen years ago) link
patently false
― super sexy psycho fantasy world (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:37 (fourteen years ago) link
for example
― crazy farting throwback jersey (gbx), Wednesday, December 2, 2009 12:30 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
ppl that check ppl out
^^ This is pretty much every single person at least on some level and so I am sorry but I do think that, while not wrong, it is a little unhealthy to be uncomfortable with this idea.
― bear say hi to me (ENBB), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:38 (fourteen years ago) link
yep
― brutt fartve (k3vin k.), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:39 (fourteen years ago) link
― super sexy psycho fantasy world (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Wednesday, December 2, 2009 12:37 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
OK. I respect your right to think that and mine to believe otherwise.
― bear say hi to me (ENBB), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:39 (fourteen years ago) link
ENBB OTM I kinda can't fathom any argument to the contrary (but feel free to go ahead and make one)
― strange asses outside liquor stores (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:43 (fourteen years ago) link
totally agree w/ENBB
― hope this helps (Granny Dainger), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:44 (fourteen years ago) link
Lock thread?
― kingkongvsgodzilla, Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:46 (fourteen years ago) link
― strange asses outside liquor stores (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, December 2, 2009 12:43 PM (2 minutes ago)
http://static.pyzam.com/img/funnypics/4/pyzamnothanks.jpg
― brutt fartve (k3vin k.), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:46 (fourteen years ago) link
i dunno, it's true but i feel like plain old ppl that check ppl out were never in question. maybe i'm wrong because this thread has too many wordsoh, no? ok.
― harbl, Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:47 (fourteen years ago) link
im not sure what happened to this thread and i still couldnt tell you what any of the arguments are
― max, Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:49 (fourteen years ago) link
me neither. oh well.
― harbl, Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:50 (fourteen years ago) link
― brutt fartve (k3vin k.), Wednesday, December 2, 2009 12:34 PM (16 minutes ago)
this is basically my position, i'm gonna let yall have at it now
― brutt fartve (k3vin k.), Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:51 (fourteen years ago) link
no thanks
― harbl, Wednesday, 2 December 2009 17:53 (fourteen years ago) link