Tiger Woods car/life crash

think of what he could have sandwiched his golf club between

Club Sandwich 24 up, 13 down

Similar to a threesome but involves 5 people, 3 male and 2 female, in a stack arrangement that resembles a Club Sandwich. In order to hold the stack together one of the women must wear a strap-on otherwise known as the 'toothpick' in the sandwich.

Could my two friends and I interest you ladies in a Club Sandwich?

club sandwich sandwich threesome 3some gang bang

by MattMc Sep 14, 2006 share this

that snap hook shot on 9 was siiick

Its pretty even money around the office that he wins this thing. And yes, that second shot on 9 was amazing.

Regardless of his horrible taste in women (his wife notwithstanding), dude can play some golf. It is proven.

That Nike commercial seems like the worst idea ever.

don't even understand it - is there something to understand?

People are making a lot of remixes of it that aren't very funny.

xp - Tiger's dad is dressing him down for sticking his dick in any available hole?

or, more likely, sticking his dick in any available hole and getting busted

(nb: Daddy's been dead for a few years, so they repurposed old audio for this purpose)

that sounds incredibly creepy & fucked up

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OEkomaBTppY

remix that's amusing:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1TO6wI9OQRE

I thought that's what it was milo z i.e. he's exploiting (or letting nike exploit) not only the dick-hole thing but also his father's death - I don't understand

I don't understand

ah!

Wow - Nike endorse philandering!

The Nike commercial is fantastic. It reminds me of the New Yorker Obama cover--it takes everything that's out there and throws at back at you in a way that upsets a lot of people. I'm not saying that their motives are altruistic--their only interest is in salvaging a public image so that they can continue to make piles of money--but in terms of the mess they have to extricate themselves from, I can't imagine a better way to handle it.

Also, people are talking about it a lot.

i hven't seen it, but i'm struggling to imagine a way that it couldn't be deeply awful

It's worse than you could possibly imagine

that sounds incredibly creepy & fucked up

That's Tiger for you!

i'm basically hearing earl as mufasa telling tiger to man the fuck up, that might be cool actually.

It's worse than you can possibly imagine.

I don't get this at all. Nike decided to stand by him--good for them; I think those who bailed are spineless--and now they have to figure out a way to move past all this as much and as quickly as possible. Should they have stayed on the sidelines for a few more months, and then at some point have snuck in a pre-scandal-type ad of Tiger hitting golf balls or some such thing--a pay-no-attention-to-that-elephant-in-the-room ad? Would a jokey ad have been better? Seems to me that would have really infuriated a lot of people. I think it's an ingenious (and relatively artistic) attempt to defuse a complicated problem.

youtube parodies of this are much less funnier than I would have thought possible.

that ad is terrible. it's trying to get tiger back to where he was before, but since he wasn't there before anyway because ~there~ is just an illusion, and a dull one at that, it is a horrible, contemptuous, cynical piece of crap.

the snl parody was somehow better than almost all of them

haven't checked out any of the other parodies, but the bit on Colbert w/ different voices on the audio -- especially Gene Wilder in Young Frankenstein -- was hysterical

that advert makes him seem like a sociopath

When Tiger pulled a shot on the one of the back 9 holes he muttered 'Tiger' to himself with a voice and a childlike frustration that reminded me of...Michael Jackson.

Mark my words, etc.

The post-final round interview was all me me me awful...fine if he doesn't want to change his ways round the course (the attempts to get him to lighten up a bit are pathetic) but he shouldn't pretend to go along with it.

I'm starting to wonder if the little ritual we've developed for celebrity scandals (give a press conference with a wife standing quietly behind you, vanish into some treatment center for a while, and then come out declaring that Everything's Changed) is starting to break down.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIFmUtXJheo

"tiger woods... you sssssssssssuck. god damn it."

Golf is extremely frustrating. I had to quit for a while because I would curse and scream after every missed shot. He shouldn't change his attitude on the course, he should just tell others to fuck off if they don't like it.

well, the problem is that he explicitly said that he was going to try and change his attitude on the course, so that's pretty much why he's getting scrutinized over it

did u curse yourself in third-person

thats the creepy part imo

i have cursed myself in third-person on the course. it's shameful but it happens.

cheating on his wife like 4,750 times is more bothersome that cursing on the course IMO

is anyone saying it isn't?

He shouldn't change his attitude on the course, he should just tell others to fuck off if they don't like it.

yeah, that'll go over real well.

All screamers and club-throwers need to get a fucking grip on the course, even the multimillionaire ones.

He's the best golfer to ever live. I think whatever he's done to this point is good enough to keep doing for the rest of his career. His attitude doesn't have to 'go over real well' with anybody, he just needs to have the lowest score at the end of Sunday.

All screamers and club-throwers need to get a fucking grip on the course, even especially the multimillionaire ones.

fixed

thanking u

the analogy jim nantz is making is so dum that he should be fired for making it

also, this --

I think whatever he's done to this point is good enough to keep doing for the rest of his career. His attitude doesn't have to 'go over real well' with anybody, he just needs to have the lowest score at the end of Sunday.

-- is baloney. Tell that to Tim Finchem, the companies that have kept his sponsorship deals, the companies that have dropped his sponsorship deals, parents of kids who said "god dammit" for the first time because they heard the best golfer in the world say it, etc etc. They'll all tell you to buy a fucking vowel and solve the puzzle. If he doesn't improve his image, he'll be toast within five years. It's okay, he's got enough money to last the rest of his life. But if Nicklaus' majors record really means anything to him, he's got to make a PR move to go with the golf talent.

Wow, Jim Nantz is on fire in this Simmons podcast.

xp what'er they gonna do, kick him off the tour? not sayin his image and his game dont go somewhat hand in hand but if he wanted to he could go total scorched earth fuck everything (no pun intended) and still prolly take down the majors record

Wow, Jim Nantz is on fire in this Simmons podcast.

― no turkey unless it's a club sandwich (polyphonic), Tuesday, April 13, 2010 4:57 PM (11 minutes ago) Bookmark

what do they talk about

Masters, NCAA tourney, NFL overtime.

He's very fiery!

I don't know. It's an interesting and complicated question. For one thing, I think there's a minimum number of events that PGA Tour players are supposed to play in per year. Tiger would lots rather just emerge from seclusion for the majors, but would Finchem let him? Also, TF has been real quiet and behind-the-scenes in penalizing players, but that smooth facade kind of got cracked by John Daly. Would he suspend Tiger for a week or a month for on-course cussing? Doubt it.

xpost to crunch