Your (Non-ILX) Dreams

two-parter: hotttt sex dream involving ex, followed by ex pushing me off a roof.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p0pM5dm--yQ&feature=player_embedded

my friend from high school died in a scuba diving accident in a pool, and my mom took me out of class (in college) to tell me, and i was like "mom i know, he was wearing his jeans" (this kid wore this one pair of distinctive jeans in high school)

I was on my way to Williamsburg to "take care of some music stuff" at a guitar shop, but I was wearing a jacket and tie, and on the way I decided to eat lunch in the Brooks Brothers Restaurant. I sat down at a table with some very preppy looking kids in jackets and ties, who didn't say anything to me but looked at me funny. Waiters kept coming over to our table, looking over at me and then walking away. The menu was really expensive and I felt awkward. Finally a waiter asked where we were from, and everyone else at the table was from some prep school, and I had to explain that I didn't actually know them, I was just "on my way to Williamsburg to take care of some music stuff." Everyone looked sort of nervous and awkward and a couple tried to politely ask me questions about it. I finally looked for an opportunity when waiters weren't watching and just got up and left. I then had to walk many floors of a parking garage to get to Williamsburg, for some reason.

Lucky you all--I don't remember my dreams. Or if I do, the memory fades after an hour or two.

gay revolution led by Godzilla.

it was all in doubt until he rose from the ocean with stars for eyes.

Don't usually have the trippy dreams, but this afternoon during a nap Neko Case, dressed as a Confederate General, kicked a man into a suitcase on a mountain.

This is the only image I recall.

Woke up an hour ago, still so fucking groggy and weirded out.

Jesus that looks like Mad Libs.

this afternoon during a nap Neko Case, dressed as a Confederate General, kicked a man into a suitcase on a mountain

This is the best thing I ever read.

Going 2 repost from my facebook:

Last night I dreamt I was watching an inverview with Prince and he was in a room lined with all-purple books and record box sets and purple-framed gold record displays. Then it turned into an interview with Scorpion. Who apparently, in my brain, sing "the Dream Police". Which I then sang along to, but Apu-style.

What The Hell at brains.

I know right!? Its like mine was just flipping through random "things i know" and smooshing them all together.

Most dreams are fascinating to the dreamer and boring to any audience: T/F?

yes i just posted about this somewhere else recently tbh!

if the audience is me, T

i enjoy hearing or reading about dreams, with the same constraints as apply to any other sort of storytelling. has to be an interesting story, and it has to be told reasonably well. i mean, a lot of kafka stories and lynch films resemble transcribed dreams, and i love those.

In a dream the other morning an old woman was berating me because I took a Post-It note off her coffin. It was made of Post-It notes.

^ a reasonable objection, imo

i had a fantastic dream last night that may have involved a nocturnal emission. I was getting busy with this hot redhead and tossing her salad and it tasted like cookies, then i proceeded to break into an impromptu version of Teslas "Love Song" for an audience of 500 at the mall, which had the entire crowd singing along. Afterwards I went back to the soundbooth to get a recording of it and they told me it wasn't on the tape and i didn't own the rights to it. I proceeded to got to "Weintraub" the lawyer and he told me I couldn't purchase the tape, then the redhead appeared again and turned into a giant chocolate chip cookie and shot me with her cookie guitar. i think i probably busted a nut when i was tossing her cookie salad, but it could have happened when i was playing tesla.

^^^ trifecta of lol, o_O and TMI

A++ instant all-time classic post imho. "i think i probably busted a nut when i was tossing her cookie salad" is the first truly great line of prose of the 2010s. please can somebody make that the new board description and elevate it to meme status thru endless out-of-context repetition?

also, dibs

that leaves out the best part, though

Yeah! but it could have happened when i was playing tesla really makes that sentence imo.

tru

it was a fantastic dream of epic proportions.

read that as "could have happened when i was playing tetris" which actually elevated for me but ymmv

dreamt that i was playing ice hockey against the highwaymen. waylon jennings was at the point on their power play and had this amazing slapshot that bounced off the ice multiple times like skipping a stone on water. it was nearly impossible to stop.

had this amazing dream last night about one of the interns here. fuckfest 5000.

Today in real life she just came up here and was talking to me, i had to sit down cuz i was getting a fatty.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p0pM5dm--yQ

cant see it roxy.

move your beer gut

it is billy joel's "tell her about it"

haha. yeah that would go over like a lead balloon (erection).

I had a very vivid dream last night that I was rehearsing a duet with Bob Dylan. We were sitting at a piano together, and the song had this bittersweet chorus that went something like "Life gets in the way/of the dreams of yesterday," -- it was sort of New Morning style, and we were sitting at a piano together, and Bob and I were supposed to be harmonizing but I couldn't get him to sing anything close to the right note. When I woke up I could sing the song and I had a harmony part in mind, but I lost it later in the day.

a few nights ago i dreamt i was having a very detailed conversation with someone about the cleveland barons

in my dream last night i collaborated on an album with the xx, cosi fanni tutti, and madonna. they had all done an ep together and let me add in my own ideas later in the process -- so it became closer to a full-length once i was done. my bf heard it and decided it my parts were amateurish and entry-level, and he laughed at the phony english accent* i was reading poetry with. when i woke up, i told my bf about it; he thought the dream-life version of himself was a dick.

*this was a collaboration with MADONNA, mind

the dream-life version of himself was a dick

this has happened to me too, alas

Wow. More pies in my dreams please.

― Archel (Archel), Wednesday, October 6, 2004 9:50 AM (6 years ago) Bookmark

lol

cosi fanni tutti

COSEY. sheesh, i *am* entry-level.

well, shit, i just started a new DEATH DREAM thread without seeing this new revive.

PROTOCOL BREACH, sorry gang

i read that as "protocol beach" and was all "pitch idea for a baywatch reboot?"

going to repost from john tesh thread because i think it's worth it:

I'm not sure where else to put this, so I will put it here.

I had a super weird dream last night that I was related by marriage to John Tesh, and he had suffered a brutal rape (which I did not see) on an airplane and the whole world was after the guy who did it. It was like this huge international media thing, and John Tesh was sort of enjoying the publicity, but lamenting the fact that he had to be brutally raped in order to have this sort of attention. He was like "what about my music? What about 7th Heaven? Was that worth nothing to these people? I had to be attacked by that animal in order to be recognized?"

That's all I remember. He knew who had done it, and he knew that once that guy was found, he (John Tesh) wouldn't get as much attention, so he just told me. It was a guy named Gary Pflower.

― Ralpharina (La Lechera), Saturday, March 26, 2011 12:45 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

so did john tesh spell that name out to you

― goole, Saturday, March 26, 2011 1:39 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

yes. yes he did.

― Ralpharina (La Lechera), Saturday, March 26, 2011 1:45 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark

u so crazy <3 <3 <3

how else would i have known how to spell Pflower?! it's not intuitive.

i have met a woman who claimed her name was Pcarolyn -- "but the P is silent"

i am v. serious

hahahahaha omg
that is funnier than any dream
even funnier because every person i know named (p)carolyn is kinda nuts (in a good way, but nuts)

http://i51.tinypic.com/23vhsg4.jpg
?

posting these here for posterity:

last night i had a dream that the san francisco giants in full uniform minus tim lincecum and joined by my BF were trying to light my feet on fire

November 28, 2010 at 1:10am · Like

i was thinking if tim just showed up he would put a stop to it

November 28, 2010 at 1:11am · Like

andy said every time he flicked his lighter to take another hit of weed i would jerk my feet around in my sleep

November 28, 2010 at 1:11am · Like · 1 person

last night i again dreamed of tim lincecum, he had been fired from the giants and was in an early american literature class with me in full giants uniform

6 hours ago · Like · 1 person

I had a dream that I was hanging out with a moustachioed Barack Obama and Bo found a pile in the snow that turned out to be the hacked up corpse of one of my coworkers (minus the head and arms) wrapped in a blanket. Additionally, there was a secret tunnel that had been dug into the earth next to the corpse. At the entrance to the tunnel was a hank of my hair, one of my teeth, and two little cardboard jewelry boxes which had some geographical coordinates written on them in my handwriting. I hadn't killed my coworker, but I realized inside the little boxes was evidence that would implicate me. I was freaking out about how I would hide the boxes without the president knowing.