What it is about BEING SINGLE and/or LIVING ALONE that is so ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC!

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this thread makes me want to VOMIT!

― blueski, Thursday, 1 March 2007 14:28 (seventeen years ago) link

That'll be the onion rings, then.

― Forest Pines, Thursday, 1 March 2007 14:31 (seventeen years ago) link

man, my colon has the unique ability to turn something as innocuous as onion rings into zyklon-b. it's terrible. BUT I LOVE ONION RINGS!!!

― chicago kevin, Thursday, 1 March 2007 14:37 (seventeen years ago) link

chicago kevin again finds the nub

― Tracer Hand, Thursday, 1 March 2007 14:37 (seventeen years ago) link

i don't know what that means but if it was a crack about living alone then you can cram it with walnuts ugly.

― chicago kevin, Thursday, 1 March 2007 14:44 (seventeen years ago) link

get to die alone, and no-one berates you for it....

― darraghmac, Thursday, 1 March 2007 14:50 (seventeen years ago) link

man, my colon has the unique ability to turn something as innocuous as onion rings into zyklon-b. it's terrible. BUT I LOVE ONION RINGS!!!

You're not alone. I'm just as bad, and so's my father.

― Forest Pines, Thursday, 1 March 2007 14:51 (seventeen years ago) link

i COULD cram it with walnuts, if i lived alone >:(

i meant you had found the paradoxical nub of the question!

― Tracer Hand, Thursday, 1 March 2007 15:01 (seventeen years ago) link

It would be nice for once in a while to come home and find all my cleaning/dishes done for me. But other than that it's okay, I get to park all four of my bicycles in the kitchen which I'm pretty sure I wouldn't get away with if someone else lived here

― Ste, Thursday, 1 March 2007 15:56 (seventeen years ago) link

i meant you had found the paradoxical nub of the question!

Is that like the proverbial egg in the briefcase?

― jaymc, Thursday, 1 March 2007 15:59 (seventeen years ago) link

Bosko Balaban Stats For Season

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Team Aston Villa
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― 688, Thursday, 1 March 2007 16:04 (seventeen years ago) link

wrong thread dude

― Ste, Thursday, 1 March 2007 16:08 (seventeen years ago) link

it is?

― 688, Thursday, 1 March 2007 16:20 (seventeen years ago) link

don't have to hide secret identity even at home, can drip-dry super costume in bathroom, kick back

no awkward "maybe we can be crime-fighting team" talk when identity inevitably discovered

uninterrupted brooding, revenge schemes

― rrrobyn, Thursday, 1 March 2007 16:23 (seventeen years ago) link

hahaha i heart rrrobyn

― tissp, Thursday, 1 March 2007 16:26 (seventeen years ago) link

If it's not I have no idea of the joke

― Ste, Thursday, 1 March 2007 16:29 (seventeen years ago) link

Kate, I hope your gig goes well, and that you flirt with many, many fans/boys/girls - I have not yet heard Shimura Curves, because you haven't toured Massachusetts. YET!

As for single/couple - separate space is important, because it's good to feel like you're single sometimes. i would prefer separate houses - even separate houses in various countries- but I live in an apartment, so we have worked out: two computers, two tvs, one bedroom, which is MINE, (no clothes tangling up bother) but he usually sleeps there, a "guest" bedroom where his stuff is all happily stored. With all of the boy stuff, including the gigantic tv, the xbox, the remotes, and his clothing. And detritus. And ephemera.
It has taken years to figure this out.
I THINK having kids pretty much rules out the huge internal searching that leads to the "separate, but equal" form of the intimate cohabitation situation.
Unless you are very rich and can have nannies. And multiple homes on various continents.

My unhappiness can be the cause of a breakdown in any system, including this relationship. Having my own "walls to color on" can be the antidote to the situation.
I like to sing, once a week, at an Irish/Celtic music session. I go by myself, get smooched by many musicians, and return home satisfied by my performance, by the companionship, and by the smooches of others. (No tongue, of course!).
I think, Kate, that singing and being adored is going to make you happy and smoochy.
Good luck!~

― aimurchie, Thursday, 1 March 2007 16:52 (seventeen years ago) link

masturbation without explanation. or compulsory participation.

― anhell*ca, Thursday, 1 March 2007 18:52 (seventeen years ago) link

No fear of being one of those couples I see ALL THE TIME that sit together in pubs, restaurants wherever, in stony silence because there's nothing left to talk about and looking as if their souls have completely withered away. Trapped together out of fear of being single. Fun times.

Have been thinking about this since yesterday. Completely otm.

― Hard like armour, Thursday, 1 March 2007 21:59 (seventeen years ago) link

Yeah, dudes, stay out of relationships in case you can't walk away from a shit one? Good theory.

(I am glad, also, that you have such insight into silence. We often sit in a comfortable silence, never thinking what it looks like to others)

― ailsa, Thursday, 1 March 2007 22:44 (seventeen years ago) link

Perhaps people are looking at me thinking "oh noes, she is unhappy and trapped in the seventh circle of hell". Ah, fuck 'em.

― ailsa, Thursday, 1 March 2007 22:46 (seventeen years ago) link

― lauren, Thursday, 1 March 2007 22:50 (seventeen years ago) link

I like being with people who, if the desire to talk isn't there, don't feel compelled to jabber.

― Michael White, Thursday, 1 March 2007 22:58 (seventeen years ago) link

OTM.

― G00blar, Thursday, 1 March 2007 23:01 (seventeen years ago) link

I think Skot said the most important thing on this thread maybe:

'm a hermit by nature. but other people keep me honest. and human.

― Trayce, Thursday, 1 March 2007 23:09 (seventeen years ago) link

Weird, Rob Sheffield said the same thing on Fluxblog yesterday.

― jaymc, Thursday, 1 March 2007 23:14 (seventeen years ago) link

im a cover hogger.

― homosexual II, Thursday, 1 March 2007 23:26 (seventeen years ago) link

Yeah, dudes, stay out of relationships in case you can't walk away from a shit one? Good theory.

Sorry Ailsa, didn't mean that I'd actually noticed other couples like that before, the sentiment just resonated because that is what happened to me after 10 yrs in the same relationship.

― Hard like armour, Friday, 2 March 2007 00:07 (seventeen years ago) link

And not through lack of goddamn trying on my side.

― Hard like armour, Friday, 2 March 2007 00:08 (seventeen years ago) link

Shit, that sounds bitter. Not bitter, just a little sad that after all the time invested it didn't work.

― Hard like armour, Friday, 2 March 2007 00:17 (seventeen years ago) link

i like having my bed all to myself and being able to have radio 4 switch itself on really early and be on for 3 hours before i get out of it (bed, not radio or my head) in the morning..

― emsk, Friday, 2 March 2007 00:57 (seventeen years ago) link

http://images.dmusic.com/v7/emoticons/zzz.gif

― am0n, Friday, 2 March 2007 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

I think Skot said the most important thing on this thread maybe:

'm a hermit by nature. but other people keep me honest. and human.

This is mad otm. I generally don't like other people, but I do sometimes love them.

― kenan, Friday, 2 March 2007 01:20 (seventeen years ago) link

Same - every time I have lived completely on my own, I've become completey batshit.

― Trayce, Friday, 2 March 2007 01:41 (seventeen years ago) link

I kind of like the system they have in some flats in expensive cities in England (the only place I've seen it, though I'm sure people do it everywhere) where they have big bedrooms, so they turn the sitting room into a bedroom and people just share the kitchen and the bathroom and they all have separate little hideaway rooms to live in. I'd like that. Private, but not completely alone.

― accentmonkey, Friday, 2 March 2007 08:14 (seventeen years ago) link

ability to conduct multiple crazy alarm schemes lasting roughly 1.5 hrs before actual out-of-bedness without ph3r of disturbing partner OTM.

messiness and up-late-solitary-drinkin etc are much more mixed blessings. i mean in coupledom you can sort of block out time for alone dipshitness tho, if yr forthright about it.

watching truly stupid stuff on tv without fear of judgement tho--priceless.

― s.clover, Friday, 2 March 2007 11:03 (seventeen years ago) link

choosing not to answer the phone. yum.

― Ste, Friday, 2 March 2007 11:06 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh silly rabbits, this thread didn't attract flack because of the question, it got the flack because it was me asking.

It's funny to talk about my "bitterness" because the ironic thing is that it was actually relationships that made me bitter, not being single. Being single is just like having a stone in your shoe - being in a bad relationship is like having nails driven through your feet. Or something.

I enjoy living on mine own. I'm an introvert, I appreciate the time and the space and the silence. If I want to deal with people, I go out. Even when I lived with other people, I spent much more time in my room than the social areas of the house. So getting to live alone is an advantage of being single for me.

Another thing I find really freeing is just not having to concentrate or worry so much about your appearance. Have the extra pint of beer or seconds of curry if it's going to make you happier, no one to complain about your putting on extra weight. No one kind of glaring at you with their arms crossed over their chest all "Are you REALLY going to wear THAT?!?!?" when you leave the house.

I'm thinking about the bitterness thing - most of the time, I'm actually a lot *less* bitter than I have been in the past. But maybe bitterness needs its own thread.

― Masonic Boom, Friday, 2 March 2007 12:40 (seventeen years ago) link

no one minds if you play late 70s deodato

― 688, Friday, 2 March 2007 12:42 (seventeen years ago) link

i find it's more likely to be people outside one's living space that judge their appearance.

― electricsound, Friday, 2 March 2007 12:51 (seventeen years ago) link

Partners have criticised my appearance more than anyone else except perhaps my mother. Everything from my weight to my hair colour and cut to my clothes to even what kind of glasses I wear.

I don't know why this is - I am *really* not a "does my bum look big in this?" kind of a girl. Maybe that's why.

― Masonic Boom, Friday, 2 March 2007 12:54 (seventeen years ago) link

Hehe - I was just sorting through some CDs to take down oxfam and I a deodata one out and I really can't decide whether to keep it on not.

― Ned Trifle II, Friday, 2 March 2007 12:54 (seventeen years ago) link

Kate, they are idiots...anyone who has seen the flickr set knows you're the hots!

― Ned Trifle II, Friday, 2 March 2007 12:56 (seventeen years ago) link

I don't know why this is - I am *really* not a "does my bum look big in this?" kind of a girl. Maybe that's why.

This is probably why--those comments inevitably lead to: "No, of course not!".

― G00blar, Friday, 2 March 2007 12:56 (seventeen years ago) link

Thanks, Ned. I wasn't fishing for compliments, though. Just perplexed. I don't ask "does my bum look big in this" of partners because I *know* my bum is big.

If I need reassurance on my appearance for photo shoots or whatever, that's what my more glam girlfriends are for.

― Masonic Boom, Friday, 2 March 2007 12:59 (seventeen years ago) link

Sorry - I knew I shouldn't drink and post...

― Ned Trifle II, Friday, 2 March 2007 12:59 (seventeen years ago) link

I SO knew that you'd start this thread, Kate.

haha me too! damn nu-ilx and its fun-hating "let's tell you who started a thread on the new answers page" horseshit.

single = never having to make any excuses for anything, basically. it's lovely. but it's also lonely sometimes, just as being in a relationship is lovely but also claustrophobic. ain't nobody gonna win this one.

― CharlieNo4, Friday, 2 March 2007 13:26 (seventeen years ago) link

upside of being single and living alone: girl texts me at 7 to meet for drinks at 8 i don't have to think of a quick cover story why i'm going out or why i stayed out until 2:30.

downside of being single and living alone: came home to empty apartment, again.

rebounded upside of being single and living alone: sleep alone is rarely a huge mistake.

― chicago kevin, Friday, 2 March 2007 14:29 (seventeen years ago) link

You should have fucked the girl, stop wasting your upside!

― Matt DC, Friday, 2 March 2007 14:32 (seventeen years ago) link

matt you have no inkling of how much of a bad idea that would have been.

― chicago kevin, Friday, 2 March 2007 14:35 (seventeen years ago) link

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