The dying days of the Fourth Reich: it's the 2007 AUSTRALIAN FEDERAL ELECTION

btw I adore the thread title.

By christ if I really was a union official I would have banned hacky sack on the lawn outside the arts common room.

If I were a union official I would've banned meetings to discuss the end of year office party using STRONGARM tactics if necessary.

^^^ THIS

I MEAN CHRIST I AM ONLY HERE TWO DAYS A WEEK NOW AS IT IS, YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO PUT ASIDE MY REAL WORK AND ATTEND A MEETING FOR A PARTY THAT NO BASTARD IS EVER HAPPY WITH JUST SO I CAN GET THE BLAME FROM VARIOUS DEPARTMENTS, YEAH THX.

Imagine what it would be like if Labor got in with its OMG GIANT UNION SPATULA.

In fact I'm tempted to start a picture thread depicting the disastrous consequences of union power.

http://www.happyworker.com/smile/be-a-happy-worker-m.jpg

That happy worker in the cubicle on the far right is checking ILX!

Which one, Snooze Bloke or Cheeseburger Girl?

TS: Snooze Bloke or Cheeseburger Girl?

Remember those ads where various worker bots are relieved that they can ring the fairness hotline and have their contracts assessed under the 'Fairness Test'. What a joke. My partner rang that hotline yesterday because she'd been asked to sign a 2 page contract which effectively had her as a contractor working a 60 hour week for this company. The first thing that happened was that a recorded message told her that nothing she was told could be relied on as legal advice. The second thing that happened was that she was put on to a 19 year old stoner who told her 'Gee, I don't know. You're a props builder? I don't know. Do you carry things or build things? Both? Well which one, it can't be both! Maybe you should have a look at our website. Hang on, I'll speak to me supervisor. *click*'

Sounds fair.

Last month my work compulsorily sent us all an official government information bulletin explaining the fairness test and what our rights are. The salient points were (a) the bulletin contained fuck-all information, providing only the useless phone number that your partner called and (b) IT WAS OBVIOUS POLITICAL CAMPAIGNING. Even the HR manager who sent it agreed that it was just an ad for the government.

http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2007/10/25/wbRATES_wideweb__470x314,0.jpg

loooooooooool

70% of a Labor government would be former trade union officials.

But did any of them live at home until 32 like our beloved PM?

"70% of a Labor government would be former trade union officials."

That ain't the half of it - 100% of ANY Rudd cabinet, INCLUDING the PM, the Deputy PM, the Treasurer, the Foreign Minister and the Attorney General, would ALL be CARD CARRYING MEMBERS of the AUSTRALIAN LABOR PARTY!!!!!!!!

Watching the news this evening my mother says "that Joe Hockey is such a lovely man"

... she wasn't being sarcastic. God.

Regardless of your political philosophy, moral philosophy, sexual orientation or even your species, Joe Hockey is NOT an attractive man.

Not even in comparison with John Howard or Peter Reith or Fabulous Phil Ruddock or Wilson Tuckey.

(But given the choice between the Hockmeister and Bronwyn Bishop....)

The Australian 'Big Brother' grand poo-bah has been given the elbow and replaced with two dimwit morning DJ's.

All Rudd/Howard has to do now is convincingly pin the blame on Howard/Rudd for this development, and all other issues will become instantly irrelevant.

I'll vote Liberal if they ever introduce the death penalty for Kyle Sandilands and Jackie O. Or, even better, Ryan "Fitzy" Fitzgerald.

Who's up for an ARIAs running commentary tonight?

No thanks, I think I've put up with enough Silverchair this year already.

Well my daughter is adamant we're watching the Veronicas. As for the Chair, cheer up - this is almost certainly the last year.

Back to POLITICS, I was driving past Yatala Prison today - proud home of Evil Terrorist Mastermind David Hicks. I seriously lolled at all the Liberal posters on Grand Junction Road on the other side of the jail, like that's going to do them any good.

Now, if you're planning a little Election Night shindig, maybe I humbly suggest that you put this record on to get the party started?

http://www.triplem.com.au/media/shows/getthis/images/getthis_johnlawscover_400x.jpg

I HAD that record! I SAMPLED it on the I&S track 'Point of No Return'!! Oh jeez, what happened to it? King Boy, do you have the inner sleeve photos?! Can you put 'em up??

No, unfortunately not - I found this gem lying around on the internet!!

Golly, I really wish I had it through (and the rare Alan Jones cover of Spandau Ballet's To Cut a Long Story Short).

That doesn't exist, you made it up.

It exists. It's a compendium of his poetry, read by him, and interspresed with whimsical arranged music peices that would not be out of place in a Neil Diamond or Englebert Humperdinck middle eight. I found it at folkways. My dad probably sold it at a Bondi sale for $1 along with all my other valuable records. Someone out there has it.

Your father is the worst man alive.

Fuck politics, this is fascinating.

Did anyone ever see that christmas album he put his arse face to? That was bad enough.

Because I'm home sick today I can watch the debate and relay information to you all LIVE, including what the worm's doing.

Dat crazy worm.

12:34 Old bloke is talking about nothing

oooh they're shaking hands

they've lost the coin!!! OH NO

Wayne Swan won the toss and will speak first

Swan's worm is flatlining, going up slightly

why is the debate in the middle of the day?

"economic plan for all australians"
"enhance national prosperity"
"investing in people"
"climate change + water = challenges yu0"
"downward pressure on interest rates"
"economic conservative" <-- worm dipped at this point
"low taxes"
"economic wankspeak blah blah"
"market reforms"
"prosperity"
"mining boom"
"golden opportunity being squandered"
"11 years of inaction on hospitals/schools/infrastructure"
"inflation & interest rates rising"
"skills crisis"
"rba has warned you fuckers Y0U DO NOT LISTEN"
"education and training" <-- worm loves this, goes spastic
"broadband"
"fair + balanced" <-- OH NOES SHUP YOU MENTAL
"enterprise level bargaining" <-- worm dipping, probably bored
"working families have never been better off my arse" <-- paraphrasing
"my package is enormous"

Worm moderately positive most of the way through. Costello looks like jabba the hut for some reason.

He's STILL talking and I need to go to the toot.

why is the debate in the middle of the day?

-- electricsound, Tuesday, 30 October 2007 12:40 (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

Because it's in the normal press club luncheon slot, and because nobody wants to see accountants talk for 90 mins

Costello is getting positive worms omg

"good economy better"
"climate change"
"harness economic resources"
"literacy & numeracy" <-- note absence of critical thought
"find cures of tomorrow"
"diseases which we can't treat properly at present" <-- e.g. being in the Liberal party
"look after pensioners"
"jobs"
"unemployment rate is lower, budget is in black"
"good fortune wasn't luck ffs, no accident you cunce"
"gst is good" <-- worm collapses; first negative all day in fact
"i have a plan!!! no really"
"more competitive tax system"
"figures marginal tax rate money fiscal primary forecast dowaward pressure etc etc" <-- worm doesn't understand this either but LOVES IT
"extra technical schools"
"young people will get technical training"
"training time for small business"
"$168 million over five years for training vouchers etc"
"aged & disability pensioners, carers, retirees" <-- worm likes this
"strong economy"
"IN PER PE TU I TY"
"provisioning for the future"

Worm moderately positive again. Compare & contrast this with howard's blatherfest last weekend

Stephen Lewis, News Ltd: "Should Aus sustain four automotive manufacturers?"

WHO CARES

No surprise the Murdoch journalist asks the pointless questions

Costello answering first, getting moderate negatives from the worm. Fucknose what he's saying. He looks lost actually.

Worm ended on a high for Costello there.

Swan: "future for manufacturing in this country". worm is giving him a big wet gob job

woah and I think it's swallowing now

Paul Bongiorno, Ten News (oxymoron): "Will Swan commit to not mounting a challenge within first 18 months of govt, and will Costello not mount a similar challenge" (audience erupts in laughter)

Swan:
"I commit to being Rudd's treasury secretary" <-- OOPS
"treasurer for >10 yrs; no interviews to biographers" <-- jab at Costello; worm v happy

Costello:
"won't commit to not challenging to Rudd, because i need to challenge economic inexperience" <-- worm grumpy
"i will serve howard into next term, or as long as we work together" <-- worm lukewarm, knows lies when it sees them