Tastiest of America's Most Fattiest Foods

Testicle Festival!

Liver mush? That's scrapple, dammit, and should have been Delaware's entry into this list rather than that crab pastry nonsense, which I've never even heard of it, much less eaten.

I'm gonna go with deep dish pizza. This is a sane person's vote and deep dish pizza is definitely the first thing I ate on this list. We didn't have turducken when I was a kid.

gravitating toward the frybread/beignet/utah scone side of the house. yum,

Those all tempted me too. Fried bread owns.

eskimo ice cream is...just

Things I would eat even multiple times per month:

Deep-dish Pizza
Deep-fried crabmeat
Chocolate chip cookies
Empanadas
Bacon Bleu Cheese Baked Potato
Chicken Fried Steak
Frybread
Fried Cheese Curds
Philly Cheesesteak

This list cheated imo with all those multi-cow burgers.

I mean, the picture of eskimo ice cream looks like you cut open the torso of a really fat person and had their guts spill out into a big mixing bowl

traditional recipes called for meat and fat from caribou, moose, bears, seals, and fish.

So, this is "ice" "cream" made without, afaict, no cream at all but, instead, fat from every local animal?

Want to let you all know that Fat Darrel should totally win this but probably wont because most of you have never had it.

Stevie D have you even had a cheesesteak

yes but I mean come on!

O! Country Ham! But then...In N Out Double Double!...But then....Beignets!...Corn Dogs!

I'm getting a little teary thinking about country ham. I don't love cold ham, but damn dude, roasted in the oven with the glazeyness and tastyness, it's like a whole different side of meat when it's hot. Also: CHRISTMAS!

But I do have a love for Corn Dogs, since they were my first 'murican food that I ate when I first visited. And DeNio's fleamarket in Roseville has the hugest awesomest corndogs in Northern Cali, I would swear my life on it.

Oh shit and Philly Cheesesteak? My first Philly Cheese with 'wiz was almost a religious experience. Usually I find the fact that greasy juice is pouring out of a sandwich kind of disgusting, but with a Philly Cheese, it's like it's weeping tears of joy that you're eating it.

Fuck I'm hungry

gtfo with Eskimo Icecream. Makes me sad/angry thinking about how much that would NOT taste at all like icecream.

Right now I'm imagining an Inuit gangsta rapper saying: "Yo! Whassup, my eskimoh?"

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, July 28, 2003

i am a cheesesteak purist so i rarely order them cuz restaurants rarely get them right outside of the tri-state area. out in california people do stupid things with cheesesteaks like adding lettuce, tomato, and mayonnaise. it's a crime.

Can't wait for the Sufjan Stevens album/self-inflicted obesity documentary.

The thing I want most out of all of these things is a corn dog. /minnesotan

i'm not sure i can make it past the eskimo ice cream. ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

ok the breakfast burrito is to share between a large family gathering right? right? going through this list may make me cry.

10 layer cake! otoh picture has fruit in it, and thus it is currently my vote.

how is a mountain of bacon a blt? where is the lt? and poor family of pigs it must take to make that.

turducken: another reason i hate 'synergy'

livermush: lol name but not as scary as the rest.

double down - if there was a picture of george w. bush/hacksaw jim duggan eating this that picture would go under 'america' in my homemade dictionary.

braaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaains... on a small bun.

most wtf replacement for a bread bun: chicken v. krispy kreme - fite!

(wtf would you want a sugary doughnut bun for a burger? fools!)

no-one can fit that arizona burger in their mouth, come on.

garbage plate - what about the macaroni salad makes it a salad? Does America just assume that by putting 'salad' on to a menu makes a meal a bit healthier? def gonna have a garbage plate, the salad will do my insides some good

cannot hate on a pizza even if the fat content is 5 times yr daily allowance. just a bargain imo, 5 days food for one go.

delaware just providing a pastry? slacking imo

i once took a poo while hungover and needed to throw up before i had a chance to flush the loo, layering my sick on my poo: the loco moco. hawaii is winning in the eww race so far.

cookies can't be evil even if they are big.

2 foot hot dog - when something is as tall as my nephew, maybe it is too big.

virginia offers..... a serving of ham. surely they could do better than part of a sunday roast.

empanadas: also disappointing. a normal pastry is not enough to make a guy throw up and thus is not enough for the list.

the double double is actually talking to me.

and now i am back from a meeting, i will continue the most pointless liveblogging of discovery

coleslaw cool, fries cool, deep fried poo droppings not cool arkansaw

fat darrwll supposedly involves both lettuce and tomato, presumably they have become that thing rotting on the roll. fries in a sandwich like this is smh material

redonkadonk wins on name alone. it is a meat platter within two grilled cheese sandwiches. 1. if you cannot attempt to fit it your mouth it isn't a sandwich imo. 2. lol the token layer of unidentifable salad leaves.

surely texas can do better than a corndog? how do you eat it, is it still in a bun? because two layers of carbs around the dog seems wasteful [lol].

rocky mountain fried poo drops

iowa's nuclear beef sundae

seriously that is not a 'food'

idaho presents a baked potato. smh.

new mexico presents a fun meal to share with friends

monster thick burger looks like it would give godzilla a belly ache.

flamethrower looks like a pussy compared to the monster. lettuce? what a gay 1/2lb burger.