Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

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Well, it did seem kind of improbable that the US would be less litigious than the UK about anything, but while we are talking about national stereotypes it did seem possible that the laws might be less in the employee's favour...

russ conway's game of life (a passing spacecadet), Friday, 29 April 2011 15:07 (thirteen years ago) link

"i'm disappointed in you. i'm feeling disappointment with you. in fact, i'm even – i don't know, just disappointed. i expected more from you. and you've provided me with a lot of disappointment. frankly, i feel like you haven't lived up to what i imagined your potential might be, and i'm not sure i can write a good recommendation for you any more. it would just say i'm disappointed, unless you can do things my way for the next few weeks, and really finish out the year strongly" (pause, while she studies my – kind of incredulous – face) "and i'm sure you're going to take that in your head, and you've already twisted it so it seems like blackmail or whatever but you know that's not what i mean"

She's clearly aiming for that new supervisor job that's opened up in Scranton.

Ned Raggett, Friday, 29 April 2011 15:08 (thirteen years ago) link

lol Ned

'what are you, the Hymen Protection League of America?' (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Friday, 29 April 2011 15:08 (thirteen years ago) link

wow, good luck Remy -- I'm glad your supervisor knows the score

Latest issue of the magazine I work for is about 10 days late to the printer because of undisclosed issues with the editor/publisher. (And one day late because of storms, and one more day late because the Staples in Morgan Hill is apparently staffed by the bastard sons of Jeff Spicoli.) Hopefully I can get it all off to the printer today.

the wages of sin is about tree fiddy (WmC), Friday, 29 April 2011 15:25 (thirteen years ago) link

many of my normally quite nice and not annoying at all co-workers seem to have turned into zombies passing comment on the dress some woman on the television is wearing at her wedding.

The New Dirty Vicar, Friday, 29 April 2011 16:04 (thirteen years ago) link

Not annoying, just funny: helped a co-worker who was having trouble burning files to a DVD. Turned out she was trying to burn them onto that clear plastic disc that sits on top of the spool of blank DVDs.

You're fucking fired and you know jack shit about horses (James Morrison), Saturday, 30 April 2011 00:38 (thirteen years ago) link

Helpdesk TL: "can you fax this customer a domain name application form?"
Me: "uh... ok" (thinking: if you knew they needed one would it not have been faster to take 5 mins to print one out and fax it to them while you were on the matter, instead of passing it to me, who doesnt do such work normally, and who put it aside, so it wasnt done til an hour later when you asked again? DONT SIGH HEAVILY AT ME. Fuck sake.)

The man who mistook his life for a FAP (Trayce), Tuesday, 10 May 2011 03:02 (thirteen years ago) link

Like seriously, he might as well have said "I need to call this customer can you dial the number for me please?". Nuts. Sick of the interruptions. I've started counting them so I can go back to my boss and say "see THIS is where all my time goes, 2 hours of 5 constant, 5-10 minute interruptions from these idjits".

The man who mistook his life for a FAP (Trayce), Tuesday, 10 May 2011 03:03 (thirteen years ago) link

Please stop with the laughing for 20 seconds at a time after every sentence.

ljubljana, Tuesday, 10 May 2011 03:34 (thirteen years ago) link

I can't stand when people do that. Every single one of my co-workers laughs uproariously at everything they say, no matter how inane: "How am I doing today? Well, it's Monday! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

shake it, shake it, sugary pee (Tarfumes The Escape Goat), Tuesday, 10 May 2011 03:41 (thirteen years ago) link

Maybe thats the "you have to laugh, or you'll go postal and kill everyone with a chainsaw" thing.

The man who mistook his life for a FAP (Trayce), Tuesday, 10 May 2011 05:25 (thirteen years ago) link

I think a lot of insecure ppl do this. Like one of the few people at my work who flat out refuses to say hello/acknowledge your presence when you see them in the lift or wherever and just stares at the ground to avoid eye contact is the loudest cackling disgrace in the office when she's with her 'team'.

yuoowemeone, Tuesday, 10 May 2011 06:20 (thirteen years ago) link

Yeah Ive been known to slightly exagerate a crap joke, small talk or hearty laugh at work on occasion out of nerves/hating small talk. Dont do it all the time tho.

The man who mistook his life for a FAP (Trayce), Tuesday, 10 May 2011 06:51 (thirteen years ago) link

Every single one of my co-workers laughs uproariously at everything they say, no matter how inane: "How am I doing today? Well, it's Monday! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Peter: Does anyone ever say to you, "Sounds like someone has a case of the Mondays?"
Lawrence: No. No, man. Shit, no, man. I believe you'd get your ass kicked sayin' something like that, man.

My new coworker has Asp3rg3rs and my stereotypes of little Spocks who find humour puzzling have been shattered, as this guy dissolves into uncontrollable giggles for about 5 minutes every time anyone mentions anything not going 100% to plan, any slight incidence of human error, etc, which is pretty much every time anyone speaks

(we are all trying to hold together some pretty badly thought-out projects in the face of general incompetence, oblivious upper management and insane timescales, but then isn't everyone who's ever had a job?)

russ conway's game of life (a passing spacecadet), Tuesday, 10 May 2011 09:02 (thirteen years ago) link

xposts - the laughter comes literally after every other sentence, not just after lame jokes. As if the whole of the job, and life, is a continual stream of WRY and IRONIC and GOSH WOULD YOU BELIEVE IT and sometimes WE ARE HAVING AN UNCOMFORTABLE CONVERSATION.

ljubljana, Tuesday, 10 May 2011 18:21 (thirteen years ago) link

Dude sitting across from me has the volume on his computer absolutely cranked so every mouse click is echoing across the whole office and the new Outlook mail tone is ridiculously loud. Somehow none of this seems to bother him at all.

'what are you, the Hymen Protection League of America?' (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Thursday, 12 May 2011 14:05 (thirteen years ago) link

DUDE, how can that not be annoying the shit out of you?

'what are you, the Hymen Protection League of America?' (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Thursday, 12 May 2011 14:39 (thirteen years ago) link

he's got popcorn stuck in his ears.

Crooked Lust (thebingo), Thursday, 12 May 2011 16:20 (thirteen years ago) link

lolz

'what are you, the Hymen Protection League of America?' (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Thursday, 12 May 2011 16:21 (thirteen years ago) link

Haven't had to post here in a while, still love the new dept, but...

Last week, long after I've rolled off this project and we'd transitioned to the ongoing te., I get questions from two of the managers asking about missing info from two of their tools.

I point out that anything 'missing' wasn't in the requirements I worked from, and that we found multiple occasions of this prior to me rolling off. Nothing I can do about it, told them what dept they should look to for filling in the gaps, since it's their responsibility now.

So nonetheless, they go to my boss's boss and try to get me tapped to fix their tools...even though three of their people and our client signed off on it prior to my rolloff and I am no longer aligned to them.

My boss's boss thinks they're childish and pushed back...

But then yesterday, I return to the office after a sick day Friday to find a frantic message asking me for files to use in training.

Files that I permanently saved and gave them links to on TEN or more occasions, and that I have permamently deleted from my own drive.

Got sick of it and gave them the links yet again and told them sternly that I am no longer responsible for these, and that they need to save these bookmarks and quit asking us.

Tired of grown adults who can't manage their own affairs!

las bolas de sudor (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 17 May 2011 13:14 (thirteen years ago) link

the interns here drive me crazy...useless. I get back at them by taking my morning shit in their bathroom.

Crooked Lust (thebingo), Tuesday, 17 May 2011 15:55 (thirteen years ago) link

upper-deck?

got electrolytes (The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall), Tuesday, 17 May 2011 16:28 (thirteen years ago) link

Goddammit. Nothing ruins a nice cup of coffee more than the rancid smell of burnt cheap-ass, "lo-cal" popcorn. I'm just going to start microwaving rancid week-old McDonald's cheeseburgers and throwing them in the trash under her desk.

'what are you, the Hymen Protection League of America?' (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Monday, 23 May 2011 14:56 (thirteen years ago) link

they have a rule at my place that you're not allowed to pop popcorn on any floors other than the one the cafeteria is on. POSs break it all the time and burnt popcorn smell permeates and I want to poison the entire building when that happens.

she rub A LINK in your poke (Neanderthal), Monday, 23 May 2011 15:08 (thirteen years ago) link

we have a no microwaving fish rule!

tehresa, Monday, 23 May 2011 15:50 (thirteen years ago) link

the interns here drive me crazy...useless. I get back at them by taking my morning shit in their bathroom.

― Crooked Lust (thebingo), Tuesday, May 17, 2011 11:55 AM (6 days ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

upper-deck?

― got electrolytes (The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall), Tuesday, May 17, 2011 12:28 PM (6 days ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

Goddammit. Nothing ruins a nice cup of coffee more than the rancid smell of burnt cheap-ass.

― 'what are you, the Hymen Protection League of America?' (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Monday, May 23, 2011 10:56 AM (52 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

Wacky Way Lounge (Evan), Monday, 23 May 2011 15:52 (thirteen years ago) link

thanks Evan for the much needed LOL right now

she rub A LINK in your poke (Neanderthal), Monday, 23 May 2011 15:53 (thirteen years ago) link

:D

Wacky Way Lounge (Evan), Monday, 23 May 2011 15:53 (thirteen years ago) link

&%^^%$%#$@$#@#$#@^%$&%*^%*^%&^%

The man who mistook his life for a FAP (Trayce), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 02:07 (thirteen years ago) link

Get told to sort something out involving ordering phone lines for new office. No one in the staff seems to have any direct idea how this would be done, which beggars belief because SOMEONE here must have ordered the damn things last time we mmved. It's dumped in my lap.

I keep hitting walls when I ask the people I'm told to ask, who all say "go ask these people". I'm getting nowhere. My boss doesnt answer the email where I ask for assistance and then this morning isnt in, so I quickly go ask the billing manager for a copy of the invoice the lines are on so I can work out more clearly who to order new lines from.

AND I GET TOLD OFF FOR ASKING SOMEONE ELSE FOR HELP AND NOT MY BOSS WHO WASNT IN.

Ok SURE, NEXT time I'll just sit here and let it slide and when we move office in 2 weeks and have no phone lines you figure out why. OK THEN.

The man who mistook his life for a FAP (Trayce), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 02:10 (thirteen years ago) link

He has this BIZARRE chip about me going to/involving other people when I'm trying to do my job, instead of him. Hes a director. I dont want to involve him with every nitpicky little pissant thing, he has better things to do. Its like hes paranoid he wont know whats going on if I dont keep him involved, which is so strange to me.

The man who mistook his life for a FAP (Trayce), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 02:12 (thirteen years ago) link

he should reply to an email then if he's so worried!

got electrolytes (The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 02:33 (thirteen years ago) link

Indeed. Ah well, its sorted out now.

The man who mistook his life for a FAP (Trayce), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 02:35 (thirteen years ago) link

no phones for anyone.

got electrolytes (The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 02:36 (thirteen years ago) link

tin-cup-and-string for all.

got electrolytes (The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 02:36 (thirteen years ago) link

\o/

The man who mistook his life for a FAP (Trayce), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 02:37 (thirteen years ago) link

honestly any manager who would get upset that you tried to do something without them is fucking retarded.

independence and not disturbing your boss all the time are two skills you're supposed to learn. mine have always been annoyed if I just immediately ran to them for everything.

she rub A LINK in your poke (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 02:43 (thirteen years ago) link

I hate when co-workers gossip to you about people at work you like and respect. Like this one part-timer, a woman, whom I don't like very much. She told some people that my boss was once disciplined for sexual harassment at his old job. I know for a fact this is pure bullshit. This kind of talk is toxic and I consider it a form of sexual harassment.

Deremiah Was a Bullfrog (u s steel), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 13:53 (thirteen years ago) link

It is toxic and completely awful, but I don't think it is exactly "sexual" harassment.

'what are you, the Hymen Protection League of America?' (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 13:54 (thirteen years ago) link

I don't mean that the behavior is sexual harassment literally, I mean, it has a similar effect, when someone intimates to you that your boss is a creep and an enemy of women when you find him professional and not lecherous or inappropriate at all.

Deremiah Was a Bullfrog (u s steel), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 14:30 (thirteen years ago) link

gotcha

'what are you, the Hymen Protection League of America?' (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 14:31 (thirteen years ago) link

I mean, it's like saying you disrespect women by respecting or associating with some creep.

Deremiah Was a Bullfrog (u s steel), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 14:31 (thirteen years ago) link

Ugh. She's burnt two bags of popcorn in the last two hours. I have never known hate like this.

'what are you, the Hymen Protection League of America?' (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 15:31 (thirteen years ago) link

Have you ever told her this is a problem? I mean, you might actually make it stop happening.

out to brunch (WmC), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 15:38 (thirteen years ago) link

I myself haven't, but several other people in the office have. She got really defensive and spouted off something about her having "limited snack options" due to "dietary concerns" and that it isn't fair to limit what she can cook in the "public" microwave.

'what are you, the Hymen Protection League of America?' (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 15:42 (thirteen years ago) link

Like, fine, but your "dietary concerns" don't mean you have to burn it every time.

'what are you, the Hymen Protection League of America?' (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 15:42 (thirteen years ago) link

haha.

The Chicago Choad (thebingo), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 16:54 (thirteen years ago) link

charcoal diet?

Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 16:57 (thirteen years ago) link

tell her to eat shit and see if she is a literalist

she rub A LINK in your poke (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 24 May 2011 19:21 (thirteen years ago) link

I'm six weeks into a new job and i haven't anyone to complain about yet. Maybe they're all being polite because i'm new.
One of the partners PA's asked me if i'd like a liquorice allsort, she talks like the Queen, it was bizarre.

not_goodwin, Tuesday, 24 May 2011 19:43 (thirteen years ago) link


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